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My nephew hits me
Hi, My problem is that when I babysit my nephew he gets a bit violent. Today for example I had to get him ready to go to his baseball game. He didn't want to go, obviously. I have a slight handicap and he uses it to his advantege. He'll stike out and hit me on my foot. It's very painful. I've tried to explain to him why he can't do that. But he just rolls his eyes and walks away. My sister has tried to help but he keeps doing it. I can't stop babysitting him because my sister has college and no one else to watch him. So what should I do. I mean he is 8 years old, he should know better.
Elie Hayes
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Want to answer more questions in the Domesticity category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Babysitting?
I suggest the website called The Sitter's Weekly.
It's a free online guide to babysitting - includes advertising advice, babysitting rates, flyer ideas, how to handle the children, etc.
It's located at [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
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beat his ass and make him cry!!! if someone doesnt do it now he'll pay for it later in life when he catches a real ass whoopin from a man like me....and i dont mean a spankin..... if hes not taught now he wont get better...
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Ugh I can't believe some of the responces below.
Whatever you do, NEVER hit a child. If he continues to hit you when you tell him to stop then punish him. Take away something he loves for example television, games, no outside, etc. Talk to his mother about it make sure she knows about his hitting. If you have too yell at him a little bit and tell him to knock it off. Let him know that you are the boss and HE is the child.
-BahaiMa22
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Volleyball has absolutely no idea what she's talking about.
Personally, I'd backhand him. And yeah, I'm sure I'll get angry responses, but children are like puppies, before you can live with them peaceably you have to establish dominance. Punishing a kid by smacking them or spanking them is not abuse, anyone who says that has never been abused, and doesn't know what the hell they're talking about.
"He's not going to learn". Yes, he is. He's going to learn that he can't hit people and suffer no consequences. The trick is, to explain to him exactly why punishment is happening, and to deliver it without anger. Punishment exists to provide structure, not revenge. You act like a little shit, you get punished. Its an important life lesson that this kid has not learned, and bribing him is only going to teach him that hitting people is the right way to go about things, it gets you more than you'd get by being nice.
Outside of the physical route you probably don't want to take, you've got to punish him somehow. He does it because he can get away with it, because he knows there are no consequences. You have to impose consequences.
Start with privileges. Rather than bribing him, give him something that you can make normal, and take it away when he refuses to cooperate. Hell, you can buy a gamecube and a few age appropriate games for cheap, you can get movies he likes, etc. These things aren't rewards for good behavior, they are normal. They are taken away for bad behavior.
Thats another thing. You don't "reward good behavior". Good should be expected, not something special you get a prize for. Instead, you tell the kid that the prizes are normal, the fun is normal. And when he does something like hitting you, he loses normal, he loses fun.
Talk to your sister about getting some stuff that entertains him, and then take it away when he acts up.
Punishments are also effectie. Set a chair facing a corner of the room, and make him sit in it facing the wall for 20 minutes (thats generally more than enough, to a hyper 8 year old 20 minutes of boredom is torture)
Set standards of expected behavior and punishments for breaking the rules, and stick to them like glue.
When you tell him something and he rolls his eyes at you, punish him for it. Grab his bicep and refuse to let him walk away. Don't wheedle, don't yell, just look him straight in the eyes and tell him that his behavior is unacceptable and that you are not going to tolerate it.
Though, honestly, a kid who hits has to be physically stopped. Its not necessary to hit a kid back to establish physical dominance, you have to let him know you aren't scared of anything he can do, and that he should be scared of what you can do.
Its a matter of maintaining the upper hand. As he isn't your kid, he feels freedom from consequences. Show him he can't hurt you with impunity. I don't think you would be remiss, when he hits you, spank him three times. Let yourself calm down before administering, and keep the numbers the exact same. If he rolls his eyes and walks away after doing it, add one spanking.
Above all, remember to be absolutely consistent. Children need structure, and if you provide it and don't flinch an inch, he will at least respect that you are not someone to be defied.
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try playing a game with him. make an agreement that if he doesnt hit you for the entire day, he wins a prize. i know this is bribery, but bribes are only bad if the prize is big- like a new toy or something. for this prize- give him something small, like a cookie. or allow him to do something a little more mature- like staying up an extra half an hour or hour.
what you SHOULDN'T do is hit him back. thats child abuse and completely wrong. he wouldn't learn anything from that. you could punish him but nothing violent (putting soap in kids mouth is considered violent) a time-out is reasonable. or if he continues to do this, take away an hour of TV time.
-i hope everything goes well!
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