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Friends in need
Lately, me and my best friend have been on this "tell each other everything" phase. Shes been telling me things that I never even imagined were going on in her mind. These things include, how she thinks she is insane, but would never accept anyones help (her mother tried sending her to a therepist a few years ago, but it backfired), how she has another world in her mind she sometimes likes to escape to, even sometimes she forgets who she is. Before this talk, she seemed perfectly normal to me. She insists she is fine, and insists nothing can help her, and the best thing that is helping is me just talking to her. We have recently decided not to talk about it so much, and she really does seem fine. I would never disobey her trust enough to tell someone else, but is there anything I can say to her that might help her?
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Dear Friends in Need,
Even though you don't want to be disloyal to the friendship, it is NEVER fair to hold this over someone IF it turns out that she is a danger to herself or others. You stated that she seems fine, but should that change, I trust that you'll do the responsible thing and tell her parents, a school counselor, teacher, minister or anyone who can address the situation.
Sometimes people who are in the greatest need of help are the most resistant to receiving it. The "backfired therapist" ordeal may be a signal that your friend is really in need of help. In terms of what you can say to her that will help, remember: keep it real and keep it honest.
I wish you well,
Earth Mother
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I'd say even if you're not going to talk about it so much, find a way to maintain the closeness of being able share everything. When you stop talking like that for a while, its hard to get it back when one of you does want to properly share something. So make sure you're regularly chatting about serious stuff as well as the usual light hearted chatter, and then if and when she does want to talk things through, or think of something you can do to help, she'll feel comfortable enoguh to confide.
xxxxx
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