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Driving with annoying parents
Anyway, whenever I drive with my parents in the car there always yelling at me, speed up, watch out, your gonna crash. They need to realize that I'm already nervous. All there doing is fueling the flame. They've gotten so nervous they haven't even let me drive for about a month now. Thing is i've never crashed and I know I'm not that bad of a driver. They say they expect me to get my liscence next year. I'll be 16. What do I do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
When I was 16 and learning to drive, I went through a similar experience with my mother. She would put on her seat belt with a resigned look on her face, as if she felt she were going to die that day under my watch.
Then, if I made any turn, she'd hold onto the the handle in the inside of the passenger side door and brace herself as if we were going to crash. She also reduced me to tears by second-guessing my every move.
I had to tell her this:
1)I have never made a mistake.
2)If you shout out stuff and you make me nervous and distract me, YOU COULD CAUSE ME TO HAVE AN ACCIDENT. And it will be YOUR FAULT.
3)You will not live forever and you need to realize that you can't baby me forever.
4)I take driving seriously and I know that driving badly risks my life, the life of my passengers, and the lives of others on the road.
I am a responsible person in many areas of my life and just because you have memories of me as a helpless baby unable to feed himself/herself, does not mean that I am frozen in time like that forever.
5)Finally, you are being disrespectful. How would you like it if while you were driving, I criticized every thing you did? Before you made every turn, I told you to do it? Would you be happy?
If you tell your parents this (gently), they might wake up to the fact that they're being obnoxious. And they're not helping you learn.
Now that I am an adult, I have one rule for my parents- particularly my mother. You are riding as a passenger in my car. Your house, your rules; my car my rules. If you do not like my driving and say so, I will drop you off at the nearest store or gas station and have you call dad to pick you up. I will not tolerate a backseat driver in my car, is that understood? I have never had to put this ultimatum to her ever again.
Best of luck,
Old Mongoose.
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It's VERY rare for parents to be able to teach their kids to drive. My Mum drove me NUTS when I was in the car and learning with her!!
If they can't sit in the car with you without driving you up the wall (or into it!) try suggesting you have professional driving lessons with a proper driving instructor. You don't have to tell them it's anything to do with them. Just explain to them that you want to get your license next year and maybe it would be a good idea to get a few lessons with a professional.
They shouldn't mind doing this, although the cost might be a factor, in which case it will depend on how badly you really want it. If you don't have a job and can't afford to pay for the lessons yourself, you may have to do a few extra chores to work off the cost. If your parents really are making learning that difficult, it will be worth the effort.
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you should talk to your parents and tell them - in a nice way - to back off they need to let you learn to be a good driver, you can't be perfect straight off, you need to learn by making mistakes and you can't do that with them yelling at you and destracting you
hope it all goes well
xshandzx
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Hi! Ok I have to say that every family goes through this! I just turned 20 years old, and when my parents are in the car, they STILL tell me how to drive! It drives me crazy so I know where you are coming from! From what you are saying, it sounds like you are their first child to reach this age and get a license! They are very scared and nervous, and are unsure of exactly how to teach you to drive, so they will yell and criticize every mistake you make. The only thing you can do is sit down, and talk to them, when all of you are calm. Before you go out for a drive, tell them something like "I appreciate the fact that you are willing to put up with me and help me learn how to drive, but can you try and teach me without yelling and criticizing me too much, because that only makes me more nervous, and makes me pay more attention to you that to the road." Hopefully they will see that you are being nice and mature, and they will go easier on you! But they will still yell every now and then! But the best thing you can do is just block them out, focus on the road, and don't yell back at them while you are driving because that can be dangerous! Don't worry, eventually things will get better!! hope that helps! :) good luck!
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although i cant drive yet, i hope this helps :)! alrighty, first you should know that your parents are always going to correct what you are doing. tell them that you are not going to drive the car if they keep this up. maybe they are this way because of a bad experience they had with driving when they were younger so try to understand where they are coming from. be honest with them, they will appericate it. hope this helps! ♥ ♥ ♥
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