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Family affairs.
My mother is having an affair, thing is. If she gets caught by my step-father, he will kick both her and me out. I have two years of school left, and I need to get good grades to get into further study because i dont have much $$. How do i convince her that she's gambling with my entire future?
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You can tell your Mother that you don't approve of her affair and you are scared that your stepdad will find out. However, most likely you will not be able to control what either of them does. Think of it this way, good grades aren't necessarily dependent of what school you are in, that part is all up to you not them. If your Mom suddenly becomes a single parent you may qualify for financial help. Where there is a will there is a way!
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i think you and your mom should sit down and seriously talk about it! becaouse that would be like really bad if you got kicked out and your grades slipped! so yeah try and talk to your mom about it! tell her how you feel and stuff
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well after those other two answers there isnt really much else to say really, try talking to your mum about it. she will be understanding. if you want more help then talk to someone at school/college, there is always someone there who will gladly listen to your problems. they are there to help. i hope this helps a little, sorry i couldnt be more helpful, but if you need anything email me
the-one-you-love@hotmail.co.uk
love Xx
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let's say that's your given position...
on the side of your step-dad:
i would get really mad if my wife REALLY has an affair with another man... i won't blame him!... but consider this, are they really having an affair?!
on the side of your mother:
don't you know you're cheating on your husband?! alright, w make a lot of mistakes on our life... but do we have to risk our marital relationship to please ourselves?
on the side of your mom's other one:
SCREW YOU! don't you know she's taken?!
on your side:
i'd consider first the fact that my mother is cheating on my step-dad rather than your schooling coz this has a greater impact on YOU!
ADVICE:
i suggest that you should keep this as secret as possible to your step-dad... help your mom... but you have to confront your mom and tell her on what she is doing (and that is cheating on your step-dad)... let your mom tell your step-dad coz on this way, you won't get caught... part of being married are obstacles like this one... let them fix these problems... don't butt in... it's their responsibility not to let YOU carry burdens such as these...
tnx
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so your step-dad deserves it...
ask yourself "is it right that you will cheat on your husband?!"...
tell your mom to confront your step-dad before everything is too late...
don't hesitate to talk to her...
communication is good for the couple and the soul
-BiAnCa-
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This is a very unfair position for you to be in, particularly at such a crucial time in your life when you really need to be focusing on more important things.
Obviously, you can't tell your Stepdad what's going on because that would make matters worse but denying that it is going on means putting far too much pressure on you. She may be your Mother but their relationship should not be your issue to resolve.
The only thing you can really do is to speak to your Mum about it. Wait until your Stepfather is out of the house and talk to your Mum. You haven't said whether or not she is aware you know about the affair but if she doesn't know, you need to tell her. Explain that although there must be something missing from her life to make her go out there and cheat on her husband, the fact that you know she's doing it is putting an unreasonable burden on you because you shouldn't have to lie to your Stepfather on her behalf.
At the end of the day, this is a problem with your Mum and in order for you to be able to carry on as normal, she needs to sort herself out. Tell her that what she's doing is putting a strain on your life and she needs to either stop cheating on your Stepfather or end the marriage because carrying on both relationships at once is going to have a negative impact on you.
This should, in theory, make her stop and think twice about what she's doing and make an effort to sort herself out. If it doesn't, you might want to consider talking to another adult for some more advice, perhaps a different family member (if her Mother is still around this would be a good option. Nobody does telling off quite like a Mother!). A teacher may also be a viable option because if it starts to have a bad impact and your grades do start slipping, they will need to know why.
Most importantly, PLEASE try not to let this affect you too badly. I know it's easier said than done and I can only begin to imagine how you feel right now but you need to be responsible for your future so don't let your Mother's actions rob you of opportunities you could have.
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