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Confused
I am 25. She is 22. Together we have spent almost half a year together. However She has broken up with me after seeing a pornsite on my computer. My question is why has she now turned her back on me. Why has she cut off all means of comunication with me. I mean we were so close. I did everything for her. I held her when she cried. I gave her flowers when she least expected it. I did everything for her. Now she wont even look at me. I am so confused. I mean she wont even talk to me. I love this girl and would do anything to get her back. I am not much of a comunicator. How can I win her back when it seems hopeless. PLease help me.
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Dude! You were looking at porn on the computer. She probably feels she was not satisfying you so that is why you went to something else(porn). Not to be rude, but why were you dumb enought to leave it up on the computer? My advice, let her cool down first and you, do not do anything rash, out of spite, or stupid. Just wait. And if all else fails, jewelry, money, clothes, cars, do you see what I am getting at? Good luck
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Your ex-girlfriend probably feels betrayed by you - almost as if you have cheated on her with other women. While some women are okay with porn, some really aren't. And it certainly seems like your ex falls into this category.
There are lots of reasons why she might feel so strongly about it, but perhaps she did not feel as secure in your relationship as you thought she did. The way forward?
You need to try to get yourself heard by her. If she won't communicate to you, it doesn't mean she won't read something you've sent to her - it's almost human nature that she would. Take some time and think about what you would like to say to her, and then put it into a heartfelt and GENUINE letter.
Once you've said your piece, the ball is in her court. Hopefully she'll listen to you and possibly open the channels of communication with you - but there's a chance she won't. Either way, porn is something that probably needs to be discussed in the future (with her or others) if you plan be casual about it. Being open about something from the start can help prevent big problems later on.
Best of luck.
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A porn site? Hahaha this girl has her priorities COMPLETELY wrong.
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like mylinhthan said, a heartfelt voicemail or writing her a letter would probably help your case, depending on whether she's a visual or audial person. i know that i love it when my boyfriend leaves me messages at one in the morning and i wake up to find that i have one new voicemail and i get to hear that i am the most beautiful creature on the face of this earth and so wonderful and how glad he is to have me in his life, all right before my day starts, and that almost always just makes me have a good day. ^_^ (sorry, mushy moment there...) granted, we've been together for more than a year, but i won't put a time limit on love.
personally, i don't really care or mind if someone looks at porn as long as it doesn't because an unhealthy obsession (unhealthy as in they spend all their time and money on it). if she won't talk to you, you've got to try and figure out on you own why she was so upset by it. was she offended by the very fact that you were even looking at porn and she's a very devout catholic (i have no idea if that's the case, and i do know some catholics who don't mind and even enjoy the occassional porn ^_^)? why she angry because she felt like you wanted the porn instead of her? was the kind of porn upsetting to her (it's possible she doesn't like girl-on-girl action or something, but again, i don't know what's on your computer)?
in the end, i think you should definitely consider about whether or not she is good for you. to me at least, porn is not a huge deal in the big scheme of things in a relationship, so if she has such a problem with it then i would try moving on. still, try the voicemail/letter thing and see how it works out. just be very sensitive and explain the situation and be understanding of her whatever reasons for being upset by what she found on you computer.
hope this helped. i'd love for you to tell me about any developments. good luck!
~*kitty*~
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anonymous -
Although it is most likely that she will not answer when you call her phone, I would suggest that you leave her a heartfelt voicemail, or better yet email or letter explaining the whole ordeal.
Explain to her that a porn site doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean that you love looking at those girls more than you enjoy laying your eyes upon her beauty. Explain to her WHY you have a porn site there in the first place. Perhaps educating yourself on how to pleasure her, to make that special moment unforgettable and amazing for her because she really means THAT MUCH to you. Depending on how serious you two were together and depending on how intimate, I'd use that line...that is, if it really was your intention.
But you get all that out of the way, pour your heart out to her. Apologize if need be, and explain to her in words how much you really love her. Put your thoughts, feelings, and emotions into words. Words can do great things.
I hope this helps! Good luck!
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