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my mom
My mom has a drinking problem. She has gotten drunk at least 3 or 4 times. I hate it when she gets drunk. My sister and I told her to not buy wine again and she promised she wouldn't, but tonight she was got drunk because she has been hiding wine from us. The next day she ALWAYS denies it. What should I do to make her admit that she lied and to make her stop??
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
tell her to take therapy or something
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It's good that you and your sister have confronted your mom about her drinking, at least it's out in the open. Keep on confronting her when she drinks, don't allow her to pretend that no one notices.
I suggest that you and your sister confront your mother together and tell her how it makes you feel when she is drunk. Be completely honest and let her know how much it upsets you both. Let her know that even if she doesn't think she gets drunk, the way she behaves when she drinks makes you both feel uncomfortable and scared for her.
You can try videotaping her if you want, but most likely she will still deny it. People generally only hide things that they are ashamed of, so if she's hiding wine, she already knows she has a problem.
Despite your best efforts, your mom may still continue to drink. Sadly, no one but your mom can stop herself from drinking, and if she does stop it will be because she wants to.
If things don't improve, you should let a family member or a family friend that you trust know what is going on.
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Video tape her. Then talk about it with her the next day like you normally do. When she really starts to deny it, break out the tape and show it to her. Tell her she either changes or someone else will take care of it.
♥
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hunny... if shes hiding the wine from you then she has a serious problem and needs professional help.. if you mean 3 or 4 times a week then that's bad.. but if it's only 3 or 4 times ever.. then thats not bad at all... theres lots of places that she could go to like alcoholics annoynomas.. etc. i think you should write her a letter and stuff.. but idk ? i hope everythign works out for the better =/
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My mother is an alcoholic, and when I was growing up with her, I hated it when she would drink. It was like having a stranger in the house when she drank, but she didn't think she acted any differently.
I had the same problem. I told her how I hated it when she got drunk, but she would try to hide it and do it anyway. I could always tell... it wasn't hard to tell. :-(
One night (I was probably 14 or 15 at the time) she was drinking, and I had an idea... I plugged the microphone into our stereo system, put a blank cassette into the cassette player, and started recording... Then carried on a conversation with mother.
Then amazingly, we had unexpected company (I've always thought he was sent by God), and I let this person know what I was doing. So we both asked her general questions like "What's your favorite thing about so-and-so" etc... She gave some answers that were completely whacked out and some that were just horribly, unbelievably embarrassing for her.
So, the next day, I told her that if she thinks she doesn't act differently when she is drinking, she needs to listed to this tape. She listened to it, and she was mortified. Especially since the guest was there and witnessed it all. She honestly had no idea she acted any differently whatsoever, and thought I was just being unreasonable when I told her I hated it when she drank.
She stopped drinking for many years after that. She only really started again when I got married and moved out. But there's only so much a person can do. *shrugs*
Anyway, a modern version of that idea would be to use a video camera, or borrow one, and video tape her when she's drunk. Then show it to her when she's sober. Maybe it will wake her up.
Good Luck.
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