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Guy is interfering in friendship
I know that this is really long and confusing, but I really need help, so please read this!!!!!
There is this group of 5 girls, and we're not a clique but we are really good friends; Girl 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. So I will be girl # 3. 1 has just announced to this guy that she likes him. She is veryyyyy shy, and I used to be her very best friend. 2 is now hanging around with all these guys, forming another group of just guys, constantly flirting with them, almost turning into a slut. SHe used to be #4's best friend. 1 and 2 are now revolving their entire lives around this one boy, who really isn't anything special, and are basically ignoring us. One of the guys they have recently befriended is a complete pervert; you can imagine how that makes me, 4 and 5 feel. 1 and 2 are now constantly going to the mall with these guys, but not only that, they aren't inviting me, 4 and 5. Last Friday, we were walking home, without 1, so we were sort of in rows talking; me with 2, and 4 and 5 together (sorry if this is a bit confusing). My house is the first one we stop at, and then 5. 4 recently told me that when me and 5 left, 2 didn't wait for 4 but just kept walking, about 100 ft ahead of her, without even looking back ignoring her. These two girls have been best friends since 6th grade, and this is the first time that this has happened since. Now she is basically ignoring all of us, and walking to school today she ditched us for someone younger than us (1 wasn't walking with us). Why are they so mad? Do they have reason to be so mad?
So far, I think the only reason that they are so mad at us is because we aren't really supportive of them constantly spending time with that one boy and ignoring us. Talking on IM, 1 didn't respond to me because she was talking on the phone to the boy. 2 asked me if she was talking to me, and I said, no, shes probably talking to that boy. She doesn't stop talking to him. Then 2 got really insulted and said, "so? What's wrong with that? I talk to Tom (another boy who is also very annoying and completely perverted) all the time and we're not even going out. Yes, me and 4 know that, and we don't really apporve. She is talking to him so much that she missed a cancellation we had to make, because she was on the phone and we couldn't reach her. 1 also spends all of her time talking to the other boy, at least 5 hours a day, on the phone
Should we talk to them? Or should we just give up on their friendship, as now their lives are completely revolting around these idiot, perverted boys?
I will really appreciate and rate any answers.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
This was a bit confusing, but I think I understand what you're getting at. I would suggest sitting down with your friends and talking to them. Tell them that you miss the closeness you all shared before and want to spend more time together like you used to. Leave out the whole issue with the guys as it's bound to be an upsetting issue. Make the issue about the loss of closeness in your friendship. If they value the friendship like you do, they'll understand your feelings and try to work out a compromise that makes everyone happy.
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I would ignore them because they obvisously (no offence) don't really appractiate friendships the way friend should. once they realize that those boys aren't going to be there very long they are probably going to come running back to you. its you choice to take them back. personally, i wouldn't because i don't want friends who are going to desert me for boys. not happening. hope i helped. good luck.
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definatly very confusing, but i sort of understand. If i were your i wouldn't stop being friends with them. give them their space. a good friend is supposed to be there through thick and thin. right now things are just a little thick. i have a best friend who i've been friends with since elementary school. and ever since shes been with this boyfriend of hers she completly forgets i even exist. but im still gunna be there. becuase boys come and go but true friends are forever. eventually they will get sick of the boys their with and maybe even find different boys. but they won't forget about you. they just are experimenting with friendships and relationships. give it time. if you feel you've given it to much time. talk to them and tell them how you feel. if they are all mean about it and act like they dont care. thats when you should think about not being friends with them. but i really would wait it out and see how it goes.
hope i helped!
xoxox ash
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hi well in my opinon you should find a way to talk to 1 and 2 at the same time, and tell them what is going on be like we have been friends since 6th grade (or whatever) and be like are we going to let some pervert boys get into your friendship. it seems like by what your telling me they have totally become boy crazy which is ok as long as they don't forget who their friends are. talk to them that is the key point for them to relize what they are doing. its good that you and 4 and 5 are still not acting like this but you will be to someday. so hope i helped try to do whatever you can to be friends again.. and remember people do change and if you don;t want to be friends with a "boy crazy,on the virge of becoming a slut" type of girl then thats ok..
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee goood luckkkkk
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Give up the friendships and don't give them back. I've known people like this, they're bad, and they'll mix you up and make you sad over and over again.
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