|
man I love is just like my father
I have a crush on this guy, actually it's more than a crush, I think I'm in love with him. We have been friends for 3 years, but I've always hoped we'd become more than friends. Well someone recently asked me what qualities about this man that I love attracted me to him. Then suddenly it dawned on me: He's exactly like my father!!! These are all the similarities:they both have dark hair and brown eyes, they both have really hairy chests, they are both very tight-wadded with there money, they are both workaholics, they both drink a lot of beer, they both are very flirtatious with woman, they are both humourous yet serious, they both have REALLY bad tempers, they both have been the boss of there own business, they both have been called an asshole behind there back, they both have been to court because of enemies made at work,they both are the oldest child, and they both have sex addictions (my dad cheated multiple times on my mom, and my crush admitted to me that he struggles with pornography.)
Well now that I've finally figured out why I'm so attracted to this man, it kind of grosses me out. Should I still have feelings for this man? Because in some perverted way it feels like I have feelings for my dad.
What should I do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Just because someone is a turn-on for you, doesn't mean they are good FOR you. This guy sounds like a bundle of misery for you. Trust me, after a few years with this guy, you would be tired, resentful, and aging before your time. You need to ask yourself if you would set this guy up on a date with your best friend or a close female relative that you care deeply for. Be honest with your answer, and then think about investing your precious years in a low-life like him.
]
Believe it or not many people often end up with this same situation. In my case I was raised by my grandparents and my girlfriend is remarkably similar in personality to my grandmother. It's a natural way to feel since that type of person has always been around and it offers you a certain feeling of safety and security.
]
i see how that can seem gross but its pretty normal. girls usually hvae an attraction to men simillar to thier fathers, and men will atract to women like thier mothers, im not sure why but it happens to alot of people. dont feel weird or grossed out, but if it is a problem for you then just dont date that guy or anything.
]
its perfectly normal. that happens to me, only its with my brother. yeah it is kinda discusting when you think about it, i mean, i always thought my brother was the uglyest thing on earth and now ive fallen for someone lik alsmost the same as him... its perfectly normal. there was a study done that said people are attracted to others based on the past acperences lol well i hope i helped :)
]
Look darling, as much as people still make jokes about Frued, not too many professionals take his views on sex and children and parents with complete seriousness anymore. Relax, you are not a freak, you are a human being who has grown comfortable and accepting of males who behave a certain way.
As for being grossed out, and I may be crossing the line here but his behaviour would gross me out whether or not my father ever behaved that way. You've listed some traits that I personally find rather unattractive...
Perhaps it is a good thing you have noticed this similarity. Do you really want to be with someone who had the same flaws as your father, who might give you the sort of life your mother had or do you want to aim higher? After three years of pinning over someone like this is this the realization that will make you able to let go?
]
well if this crush reminds you of your dad then why not go for it its not like your liking your dad you just like the qualities that your dad has and if he reminds you of him that is a good thing because he will provide and protect you be with you always and stay with you always and always love and care for you no matter what he is a strong loving hard working mature man that will step up when he needs to and step down when he needs to he willmake sure you and your family will always be safe and provided for and thats the kind of man that you want to love and be with so put a side that he is just like your dad and think of the reasons he will make a perfect boyfriend or husband and focus on that stuff because its not who he reminds you of it what you think of him on the inside and outside. good luck
-attractive
]
Hello there! I'm PurplePudgyPenguin and I'm here to... give advice (no duh, right? lol. Figured) Anyways -sips coffee and looks all professional- It doesn't seem to me like you shouldn't be too worried. If you really like this guy, you should push aside who he reminds you of and just love him for him. And actually, you're at a great advantage. If this guy is just like your dad, then your dad and him are going to get along perfectly! Dont worry about anything, you just have to ask yourself, "Do I still love him?" Now to answer this question (Yes, I am going to blab some more. MWAHAHAHAHA!). Try just hanging out with him for awhile. If you find yourself still majorly in love with him, then forget about who he reminds you of. You should just love him for him. Actually there is a saying like: "We marry our fathers" but forget about that. You love him for just him. Oh, and dont worry about feeling like you like your dad too. It's just an odd emotion that'll pass away soon. Just keep hanging with this guy and, before you know it, the thoughts of him reminding you of your dad, will fade away. I can't promise you that they'll just disappear because all minds are different and work in different ways. It's up to you if they fade faster or go slower.
I seriously hope I helped you. If not, there are plenty of other advice-givers here that are 10 times better than me. If I couldn't help ya, they definately will. Take care, hun! Have a good day!
Luvs,
~PPP~
]
More Questions: |