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What do you do if a friend becomes hostile to you and you do
I'm a stay-at-home mom who likes to go to the park with my daughter and baby. I met a man last year who is a great-grandfather who takes his two great-granddaughters to the park every day (well almost). I thought he was really nice and friendly and my daughter likes playing with the girls. I've known him since last year, and we always make pleasant conversation and he offers my daughter and I treats. There is nothing going on between us, I am married and he is just a casual friend. The other day he snapped at me for no reason and I still can't figure it out. What's worse, he did it right in front of one of the kids. My daughter was talking to her friend about another friend from school who called her a "cry-baby" because my daughter said she was going to tell on her about something. I said " Why would she call you that? That means you cry a lot." Sam, (my friend) said "No it doesn't, it means you tattle on people." I said "I never heard it used that way." Anyways, this is a silly conversation, right? He suddenly got really angry and said "I've been around a lot longer than you and have heard what kids say in the schoolyard. You talk a lot, but you don't know shit!" Now, was that necessary, just because we had a difference of opinion about something stupid? I looked at him, totally shocked, and said. "I never said I knew everything." He said "You think you do." I just looked at him again, like I couldn't believe his attitude, and I said "This is a silly thing to get so uptight about." I don't know if he heard me. He just got up and started to play with the kids. He wouldn't talk to me after that, and I didn't talk to him. I know I should've said. "We are both adults. There is no reason for you to be so rude. We both have a right to our opinions, and this is a trivial thing. You are setting a bad example in front of the kids." I know I should've said something like this, but I was so shocked, I couldn't think of anything. I think that maybe he was mad at me about something else, and was just using this stupid disagreement as an excuse to vent. Or just having a bad day. What do you think? I don't want tension between us because my daughter and the girls are really good friends. Any advice?
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For one reason or another this man seems to be very short tempered. I don't think it is necessary for you to be his friend just because you want the children to be friends. If your well being was not in any personal danger then you should just ignore the situation and play it by ear. I would be concerned about a man who curses you out right in front of your kid. Especially when he is a stranger. As an adult it is your responsibility to make sure that your children are in a safe nurturing positive environment. Is this the type of person you want your children to be around? That is a question you have to answer yourself.
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You kept your cool about it, which is great. I know some who would've snapped back, myself included. Ask him if he was upset. Also, remind me that things change over the years. Take for example, the saying "That's ill". The 'older' (not trying to offend) generation would think I meant "That's sick!", while the 'younger' generation would know that I mean "That's cool". Over decades of time, words take on new meaning. Another example, is the word "sad". "Man, that's sad" means "Man, that's pathetic", despite the fact that the word sad means depressed.
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i dont think you should worry about it. i mean everyone was has their bad days. if he continues doing stuff like that i think maybe you should be worried but i suppose watching to young kids everyday could take its tool on someone older
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Well if this continue to happen then try to talk to him about it. But don't ask him straight out about it. He might have had a bad day or someting else could have been bothering him. Don't hold a grudge just forgive and forget life's too short to live it worrying, cheer up! You don't want your kids to start getting into it now do you...so just think of it as nothing.
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Sounds like hes had a bad schoolyard experience before.
I would try to let it go unless he brings it up again. He may very well apologise or just pretend it didn't happen next time you see him.
He may have been having a really bad day, not an excuse I know, but it happens.
Since you have known him a while and this is is the only time something like this has happened, I think something just rubbed him the wrong way.
Perhaps the holiday season has something to do with it also. :)
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