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i want my guy to take more control
how can i get my guy to take more control in our relationship when it comes to intimacy? it seems like whenever we do anything i have to make the first move. i mean once i make a move hes into it... but he wont do ANYTHING unless i do it first... is it cause hes scared hell offend me or what? so why and how can i change it? thanx
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
Guys are afraid a lot to make the first move for fear of embarrassment mostly. Once he feels comfortable, he'll make better moves. Guys like many fantasies, for example a big fantasy for a lot of guys is having sex with his teacher. Find out his fantasy and play off that. He'll feel more comfortable and ready to make a move because he knows that you are ready to give him what he wants. Or he'll just bitch out and not realize a good thing when he has it and not do anything at all. This is very rare though :-)
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A lot of guys are shy about taking the first steps because, yes, they are scared that you wont like it or they will attempt to do something that you wont like and you will hold it against them or something.
the big thing here is communication. Tell him you want him to take charge sometimes. Discuss each others boundries and exactly how far you are willing to go right now in your relationship. And continue to discuss it as your relationship grows.
If you feel uncomfortable doing something tell him. Encourage him to do the same. If you guys have this talk i can almost guarentee that he will take charge at times because he will already be informed on what not to do and what you will like.
Hope it helped hun
<3
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He doesn't make the first move when it comes to that because he doesnt want to seem like he's pressuring you into doing it. Because sometimes girls don't want to get all into it and when a guy tries to make the move they get all pissed off. Some girls are like, not saying you are. So, he's just respecting you and treating you really good! But, if you still want him to make the first move, just talk to him about it, just be like "I've noticed I always have to make the first move when we're making out, I really appreciate you respecting me and all, but just to let you know, you can make the first move too, it won't make me mad or anything" Just say something like that. I hope that works! If you need anything else, just leave a message in my inbox.
♥ Kourtney
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be like im cold...it works for me
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Thats called Respect!!! Just tell him you`d like for him to take charge instead of you all the time.. Tell him you want him to suprise you every now and then.. ♥ Dez
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How about asking him? Or talking to him?
If subtle hints haven't worked then it is time to spell it right out for him. Maybe even send him a script or a story of exactly what you'd like him to do.
He is probably afraid of doing something you don't like or of being laughed at. You need to make it absolutely clear what you want and like and he needs to be able to trust you enough to take those risks. So get talking!
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