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Another one of those stewpid love questions. and it's really
As indicated by the subject of this question, this is another one of those 'omg am i in love? or is it lust? or is it... something my mind made up to mock me?" type questions. So please bear with me. this is going to be a LONG question or series of questions. If you don't believe me go ahead and scroll down and look.
My first question would be to the guys: Do you guys enjoy flirting with a girl before making any type of move? It seems to me that guys find it fun to seem interested in a girl then totally shoot her down. Or something to that effect. Do guys believe in real honest-to-goodness true love? Or do you guys just see flings [right word?] as the right thing and see how many girlfriends you can get and then dump before you graduate high school/college? Right now, I would to state that no, I am not biased in seeing guys as heart-breakers and have no feelings. I'm just wondering, since I have no idea what a guy's notion of flirting is. Do guys believe in love at first sight or true love? Or is it that the only love left in this world is more similar to lust? Do you guys have high standards in what you expect in the 'perfect' girl?
Girls. Do any of you girls find yourselves falling in love with every single guy that comes along and makes an impact or small dent in your life? Do you find yourself daydreaming about the cute guy you've never talked to before or one of your new guy friends falling in love with you? Do you believe that out there, somewhere, there is a perfect guy? Do you believe that you'll meet him before you graduate high school or after? before you graduate college or after? I'm the type of person who wants a soul mate before graduating high school. High standard but what can I say? Almost every girl dreams of finding the perfect one before too long. Is it wrong to have too many high standards for what you want in a guy?
Now this section is to either gender. How do you know if you're truly 'in love' and not lusting? People probably have asked this question many times before, but I'm still curious. I've fallen in and out of love faster than you can say "omgimthinkimlove~". I can't really trust my feelings so saying things like "just trust your heart" does not bode well with me. What's the difference between love and lust as in how do you know when you feeling lust instead of love? Can you trust yourself to truly to be 'heads over heels' in love? Can your deep feelings of love be a fabrication of your mind when it senses that you're really lonely? Define true love, give me how you feel when you believe you're truly in love.
Anyone who bothers to read this entire question passage and cares to think deeply about the questions i've asked and answers thoughtfully would definitely get a 5. I would be really surprised if more than three people answer more than three questions or bother to answer at all. Answer more than two questions at least please. If you read this far, congratulations you get a virtual cookie and probably a 5 if you answer all the above questions [depending on if you're a girl or guy] or more than three. Idiots who have no idea what they're saying and are trying to sound philosophical will have a 1 branded on their foreheads or something.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Wow everything Ive ever wanted to ask about love you have just done so well. I am a girl and Im gonna answer the second question first. I dont fall in love eaisly but I do give my heatd to every Tom Dick and Harry(metaphorically speaknig) But yeah I do fall fast and I feel good about it until the insainly harsh break up and I go straight into a freaky depression. I thought I found the perfect guy a month ago. He was Christan, never cursed, working, making movney, paying my way, called every day, and spent time with me. Mr. Perfect right? ahh how I am one to be so eaisly fooled! I live in Callahan fl and everyone finds there soulmate in hs and I thought I did until yesterday when I broke up w/ the a/hole bc him and his x bonded again. And when I went to go break up with him she was there! So I was a succer and thought it was love at first sight! My standards are about as high as they can get and I could care less. They have to be drug free, christan, and a real man. He was 3 out of 3 until about a couple days ago. So its ok to have these standards and yeah love is a word that is just tossed and I plan on finding my guy in HS so Idk what else to say to that. To answer your 3rd question....
Love and lust I mix up so easily. Well I think I finally figured them out. Lust to me is what gou want from some boy and you dont care how it turns out in the end. Love is something you share with someone you know is right. When you look into that persone eyes you can see yourself lost and never wanting to come back. Love is when you can be in a room alone and stick out 20 of just talking and not making out ect. Love is when you can watch a movie youve seen befor and watch it. Love is just a feeling you get when he calls eveyday at the same time even though school endeed 20 minutes ago or you just left his house. But love can come back and bite you in the but.Love comes so fast that it makes you move to fast in the relationship and you end up seperated. Love can lead to sex on accident and then ruines everything. So I think Love can come but I would rather it develope to be stongeer then all come at once to ruine something. Lust is when your looking for a fun time!! So I hope Ianswered your questions bc you really help me answer mine. SOrry so long but I finally said what I had to say
Bianca
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Any time I see a guy that I just met or have a conversation that really makes me think. I begin to fall for them. Yes I always daydream about guys even if I don't know their names. And I will begin to think that if they look at me they think I am pretty and like me. I don't know, though I have mixed feelings all the time. Yes, I believe there is one perfect guy for every girl. Although I also believe that they are not gonna be perfect to EVERY woman's expectations but in your eyes when you are in love he seems SO perfect. I believe you will meet them after collage. Because when you are young every guy that is cute makes you turn your head. And when you are older you have had plenty of expeirence and you know what you do and don't want in a guy. I want to wait and explore my options and get to know as many guys as I can so I know I am making the right decision that will make me happy for the rest of my life.I don't realyl have a high standard. All I want is for a guy to care about me, respect me, and love me for me not my features. Yes it is every girls dream to find 'prince charming' No I don't think it is wrong but I do believe it will be VERY hard for you to find the guy like that. How do you know if you're truly 'in love' and not lusting? Hmmm this is a hard question. Love is when you want to be with someone so much you can hardly breath but lust is when you like someone but you could change when you saw another cute guy pass. I have fallen for many guys too. I am a big flirt and I know that sounds bad but I am. I mean I don't mean to be but I try to be nice and to people it looks like I am flirting. I can't really trust my feelings either and how I deal with it is to wait and see if the love lasts. Like if you 'love' someone else the next day or week you can more than likely tell it was just lust. but if it lasts atlease 4 months I say it is love. You can't trust yourself completely for everything but you learn more about yourself by listening to you heart. I know you said that don't bode with you but you may be have mixtures between what your HEAD is telling you and what your HEART is telling you. Can your deep feelings of love be a fabrication of your mind when it senses that you're really lonely?' yea they can. It is telling you that you need someone to love and you need someone to hold you. I get this feeling a lot. I think that may be the reason why I always hug everyone. True Love: That can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars over the fence, world series kind of love.(that is my definition of TRUE LOVE.) The real definition is..
True Love:
True love is very misunderstood, and despite the best efforts of philosophers through out the ages it still remains a mystery to most people. The definition of true love offered by Dr. Peck is worth considering, however. Basically, he explains true love as giving of yourself for the sake of the spiritual growth of other people and for your own spiritual growth.
The first thing you may notice about this definition is that it implies true love has a purpose, and that purpose revolves around personal growth. Love is not just an emotion, however intense and deep it feels. Central to this definition is the idea that through loving others we ourselves grow. Through the practice of loving we become a more loving person. Spiritual growth can thus be measured by how loving we truly are. True love of oneself is also included in this definition. To love yourself means doing what is good for your own personal and spiritual growth, even when it is uncomfortable or difficult. Loving ourselves does not mean just being nice to ourselves and satisfying all our earthly pleasures. (In reality, this is very detrimental to our spiritual growth because it makes us self-indulgent and self-centered.)
To love others takes effort, and in some cases this can be very hard work. Ideally, we should also be able to love people whom we do not particularly like or find attractive. This is not as unreasonable as it may sound, if you understand that love is not just a feeling, but it is expressed when you do something for another person that benefits their spiritual and emotional growth, which in turn helps them realize their full human potential.
When I think I am in love.. Is when all I can think about is him and that he is the best thing in the world. He can do no wrong and anything people say bad about him is NOT true and he could never do something that would hurt me or make me cry.
I hope I helped you. If you need more adivce ask me! I will try and help.
Xoxo,
TakeT_H_Achance!
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realy guys seem to have that reputation of flirting and then breaking hearts straight after huh? well i can almost guarantee that most guys will not do this on purpose. Of course everybody loves flirting but I guess the whole point of flirting is to test how compatible you are with that person, you can never really know how compatible you are with that person until you put them to the test ie. flirting.
Of course a lot of the time it turns out that the person isn't quite what you had in mind, and then interest would naturally drop. nothing personal against the girl, but it just didn't seem to click I guess. but i guess the moral of the story is enjoy the flirting regardless.
alright youre next question, is it lust or love? I always wondered about this too, and I came to a good test. What you do is ask youself: "would you feel earth shattering sadness if that person was to disappear forever?"
If the answer is Yes, then you know its true love because something really special would have ripped away from you.
If the answer is No, then even though they may have been the hottest person around they were not important for you. I can say that about Jessica Alba, damn thats one fine chick, however if she was to disappear forever I can safely say I wouldn't give it a second though. Defintely Lust.
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ok well im a guy soo i would have to say honestly i do like flirting with that girl befor ei make a moto se if she is really intrseted in me.... there a few who really are interested in the girl and care bout the girl but you have ot find the right one that really tlks from the heart and that really loves you..some guys bealive in hoest to true love but yet agiann you must find that type of a guy that does bealive in that..some guys jus see lings depends on the guy but me i bealive in true to honest love.. no well some guys want to see how many girls they can get before hs or college but that right guy for you will bealive in true love and be with you and love you with his heart and not see how man girls he can get before collge or hisgh scool.. yes well i can speak for guys like me i found the right girl for me at first sight but yet agian it depemnds on the type of a guy but me or a person llike me belaives in love at first sight...honestly no you dont need the perfect grl to be happy but what you really need it the RIGHT girl for you ...honestly what are high standerds what do you need them for what we guys well a guy liek me looks for is not high stnaderds but the right girl for me..
well for the there genders you now en your in luv wen all you want to do is see that girl tlk to her be with her and just overall see her in ur heart and love her with heart and soul...liek i said love is when no matter what happends you cannot get thatperson of your mind and all u think bout is care and love them and want to be with them and see them and talk to them lsut your jsu like basiclly iffy on things and not soos ure bout goin otut naht night...like for exaple love for what happened to em one time i was at a party and every one was dancing hot girls there and all and i just couldnt get her off off my mind i actually talked to her allt hrue the party that is love and im still in love with that girl at least a year later...thats love..theres nothin worng with bein heaed over heells in love becouse thats what love is about and if your heart and soul are tellingyou you love that person and think boutt hem and all of that stuff then theres nothin wrong with bein heads over heels..no hoenstly when your in love you no it truly throughout your whole body and you feel that love the time..when im truly in love that would be that example that i gave above about the party and liek right now i can tget this girl off my mind i told her i love her and all i do is think about her when i am around anyone girls or guys shes jus the RIGHT girl for me...
good luck if you have any other guestions ask me or im me on capsgoalie91
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Being a guy, I'm just going to answer what I can.
First, I want to say that boys DO enjoy flirting with girls, but I'm pretty sure that girls like to flirt with us as well. In most cases, we DON'T want to lead anyone on, unless it's the person we like.
I don't think it would be right for me to answer the other questions about what we want in a girl, because it's different for everyone. I think, basically, we just want somebody we feel comfortable around and that we can tell anything to.
Personally, I believe in true love. I don't believe in love at first sight at all. While physical attraction is initially important, it's personalities that grow on you and can play a much bigger role.
I think the difference between love and lusting would be what you want out of the relationship. If you want it to go somewhere and care very little about the physical aspect of it, then I think it could be close to love. You need to ask yourself what you would give up for them. Or what future you think you could have together.
I hope this helped. If you have any more questions, just ask.
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as for your qirl ?;s i'lll say this much its okay you have soo many questions & inputs on life! and as for you having high standards well one day a man that you will fall madly in love w. will in fact meet those standards. NOt to sound like one of those people in a movie .. buh there is a prince charminq for you some where out there and as of if you are meeting him be4 or after highschool well no1 can really tell right now you'll meet him when he comes along. and of course mostly all qirls do feel like they fall in love w. every quy they feel is speciall to them whether its a close friend,distantfriend, new friend, or an old friend they could poss. feel as if they are in love but most of the time its not love its just that qirls feel secure and comfort in knowin she has a quy who cares for her. you kno your in love when you qet thea ... like it doesnt matter weather the quy/qirl is hott or smart or sexii or beautiful [it kind of helps] but the onlii thing that matters in love is weather u like that persons personality and enjoys their company and loves spending time w. that person no matter what the circumstances are!And to me true love is caring about the person your claim to love NO MATTER WHAT weather they are poor or rich uqly or beautiful smart or dumn just pain and simple NMW happens to tha person you will always want to be with him/her!
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Hey, I'm a girl =P
I do tend to "fall in love" with every guy that makes a small impact in my life. I never realized that until now, like I'll start talking to some guy & then I'll tell him that I love him, and then I meet another guy and tell him I love him and I'll stop talking to the first guy. That's how it is with me, unfortunetly. =/ Haha, yes I do find myself daydreaming about my guy friends falling in love w/ me :) Yes, I think somewhere out there, there's that one special perfect guy, just for me! I'd like to tell myself I already found that special guy, but I shouldn't because I don't think I have, I'm only a sophmore in highschool. How pathetic is that? I'm not really sure when I'll meet him, hopefully soon but I don't know. :/ I don't think it's wrong to have high standards on guys, but I'm not like that at all. So, I don't have to worry if he's like fat or too tall or whatever.
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