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not happy anymore
ok so my boyfriends best friend died in a fire and hes beside himself plus im starting highschool and we dont live near each other so he keeps telling me he needs me the most now and he cant have me he thinks im unhappy with him and im not im extremely happy when hes sober truth of the matter is tho he tried to drink himself to death if it hadnt been for my friend hed be dead by now hes just so unhappy and im unhappy knowing i cant do anything to fix it but what worries me is that he doesnt care that im so unhappy now theres nothing hell let me do about the situation he promised me he wouldnt try to kill himself but hes still drinking weve broken up or whatever but i miss hearing from him " i love you" and i miss saying it yesterday i was talking to him and he just sayd i gotta go bye and it hurt me so bad not seeing the i love you more than anything at the end im trying to be there for him but hes not letting me its like hes trying to shut me out i dont know what i can do i love him to much to just let him go and be in this depression i want to help but he wont let me what can i do??? -broken hearted
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aww sweetheart i*m so sorry. Well he*s not doing this to hurt you which I hope you know, but when he lost his best friend his method of coping i guess was just shutting everyone else in the world out.. he needs to know that alcohal doesn*t cure the pain it just numbs it (yeah i got that from 8 crazy nites.. good advice tho) anyway he needs to go to counseling because he*s grieving in a very unhealthy way. You also need to go for depression. I was very depressed about 2 years ago? and i went to counseling for a summer and i*m soooo much better. I truly believe everything happens for a reason and once you guys both go get help i feel like your relatonship can start a get and become stronger from this situation!! I hope everything goes well for you and once again i*m very sorry!! good luck sweety!!
Hope i helped!! xoxo, chelsea
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wow im so sorry for both of you. as far as he goes, it sounds as if you need to get him some help. anyone could do it. a parent,teacher, or even a phyciatrist. try and see him everyweekend and talk to him whenever he needs someone to talk to. once he gets over it (which im sure will eventually happen) you guys can go on with your lives whether its seperatly or together. but as for now, try to give him some space and find somebody else. give him time alone to do whatever he needs to do (except drink himself to death or do anything else to him). but do find him help, it will be the best thing you could do for him. good luck
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I was involved in a very similar situation long ago, and I've got to tell you: you're in over your head. This *isn't* something you can fix yourself.
He needs professional help. You should talk to him about it, if you're willing. If you're not comfortable with that, you need to talk to a responsible adult; his parents, a school counselor, his doctor, SOMEONE. Tell them how depressed he is, and tell them that you that you're very worried about him.
Now, he'll probably find out that you did that. And he may regard it as a betrayal. I'm not going to lie to you: this could seriously jeopardize your relationship with him.
But it's what he needs. He desperately needs help, as soon as possible. Because he's almost certainly not going to get better by himself - not soon, at any rate. And there's certainly a chance that he may hurt himself seriously in the meantime.
You need support, too. This sort of thing is incredibly hard to deal with; I was in college when it happened to me, and it was bad *then*. Since you're just starting high school, it's probably going to be much harder for you.
So it would be a good idea to talk to your parents about seeing a professional therapist yourself, at least for a little while.
I'm sorry that you're in this situation. It's a terrible thing to deal with - I still have bad memories of my own similar experience. At this point, you need to ask for and accept the help of adults, because the situation is far too dangerous to handle on your own. As I learned, to my regret, many years ago.
I hope everything turns out for the best. Good luck.
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wow thats a tought situation hun.. as for you two being unhappy.. its a hard thing to deal with.. just let him know that you care for him.. maybe he needs to hear it! who knows maybe hes waiting for you to tell him that you love him? as for his suicidal attempt... thats pretty serious stuff.. he sounds like he needs someone as you said.. if i were you id talk to him about what hes missing in his life? maybe he needs serious help or maybe he doesnt.. if you say he wont let you help.. then the best thing to do for him is tell him your always there and that he can lean on you! hope i helped...
-gingeralex
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Hello..
Sorry about your situation, but i think you need too call him & actually tell him how you feel. Tell him that you love him,that you hate seeing him upset & most of all that you miss him like crazy. You should try to talk either onn the phone or in person. Tell him you cant let him go and that you need him. Make sure he knows that you care..good luck..!
Chelsea
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