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* Caught Between The 2 *
Okay heres the deal...
Ive been dating this GREAT guy i mean he's perfect..But im not exactly the most loyal person..So over spring break i lost mah virginity 2 some one else..Yeah i kno its bad and n a way i regret it..But the otha guy well call him Will is soo hot, popular, cute, sweet, and hes jus a lil freak and we mesh good togetha. PLus i think (i know) i could really stop my game for Will which would be a HUGE achievement for me!! Now on 2 mah boifriend again well call him Jay. Jay is okay lookin, sweetheart, says he loves me 2 death, hes perfect ecspect..he cant make me laugh like Will and he thinks hes funni when hes not @ all..Me & Will jus have more n common PLUS he took my virginity!
Well i dont want 2 be with Jay anymore but im n fear of hurting him AND everyone says ill be making a huge mistake because hes so good 2 me.
But I would prefer 2 date Will jus for the simple fact we have more n common..
But i dont know what 2 do OR HOW 2 DO IT!!
-Caught Up-
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
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and you having sex with this other guy didnt hurt him already?
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You break up with Jay. Yes it's going to hurt him, even if you're nice about it. Date the one you want to date. It is up to you to decide not your friends, no matter how good intentioned they may be.
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Since you cheated, you deserve neither of them. Stay single to spare more guys heartbreak and grow up.
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Dear Caught Up (gotta love that song :D )
If you look back on your question you'll notice what I did....how much you talked about "will." It sounds to me like you are really into him and everything he has to offer. I can understand how you feel about the situation with "Jay" and how you don't want to hurt his feelings because he really is a great guy. But think of it this way ... you can't make yourself love someone. There isn't anything you can do to change him and mold him into a "will." It sounds to me like Jay is more into a serious relationship and I can tell that you aren't ready for that yet. You seem to be looking for someone that you can have fun and laugh with and be carefree .... a will perhaps! ;) You need to explain all of this to Jay and let him know that you just aren't on the same page and one day you may be ... but not at this point in your life. But please don't base your decision on the fact that will took your virginity. I realize that's very sacred, but it's not a reason to date one person over another. Trust me...I've been there ... done that, lol.
Oh yeah and about what everyone else is telling you. You need to listen to yourself and what YOU want and YOU need. Nobody else is a better judge of that than yourself. I've made the mistake of listening to friends when they told me to give this "nice guy" a chance even though I wasn't really into him and didn't find him attractive ... well he ended up being very abusive, mentally and physically. Please trust your own instincts and do what feels right!
I don't really know how to tell you to let Jay down gently. I can't really say since I don't know the guy. Just be as gently about it as you possibly can. Make sure you sit down with him one and one and be completely honest. Sugar coating anything isn't going to make it better for anyone!
Best of luck to you!
~ Amanda ;)
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I think you're in a tight situation there :). Remember, once you'll ease out of a relationship, chances are you can't return in it the easy way. Jay loves you but apparently you don't love him. If that's the case, tell him that. It's better hurting him now that it's still early than hurting him more when it's too late.
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