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my counciler just dosnt get it!
i have had some problems with friends in school latley and i got my unch period changed so i wouldnt have to be with those girls any more. the counciler wants me to tell him their names so we can all have a talk but my mom already tried and nothing worked. we asked him not to but he says he really wants to. they'll just make fun of me for telling on them because thats the way they are. even so the counciler wants us to do this. space fem, what should i do?
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i think you should tell your counselor no thanks, that your not going to let it get to you. if he or she still wants to do so..stop seeing her. i think you should just plat it off like your really dont care. look at them like they are dumb for doing what they are doing, and are just plain immature. cuz really they are...
it should work..thats how the human minds is..lol
good luck
xoxo Alyssa
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Tell your counsellor that you appreciate them trying to help you but that your family has decided that such a talk would be detrimental to your health/well-being. Let them know you will not partake and will not be having any further sessions with them.
Guidance Counsellors are NOT psychologists nor psychiatrists and really have little in the way of training to offer anyone sage advice on what to do with bullying, their life, career etc or very bad situations.
If you want help with your social skills see a psychologist and learn how to work to the point where nobody can bother you. If it's a physical bullying issue see a psychiatrist, work through the damage they've done, social skills, self-esteem etc and empower yourself.
As for this counsellor have your parents tell them or tell your principal that they aren't respecting you or your wishes at all and that you'll no longer be having sessions or having tem act on your behalf.
You can and should refuse to name your tormenters and be forced to "talk it out" It NEVER achieves a thing except to make them want to go after you even harder.
Go about your business you don't have to do a thing any counsellor at school says if you don't feel it's right or safe to do so. They've over-stepped their boundary and I'm sure your parents will set them straight. Don't offer up the names or other info if you feel it will lead to further problems.
Good Counsellors actually LISTEN to the people they are trying to help and do not force their will on others if the student isn't comfortable. This is why they're a guidance counsellor with no formal training in a school dreaming of doing a shrink's job.
If they won't listen go to the medical professionals who actually have a degree and training to do what this person can't. If they are physically attacking you at school and the bullying is more than words document it and learn how to fend yourself. Dump one of them on their ass and they'll back off.
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Councilors huh? In this case you should just stick to your guns and explain that you understand that he has a job to do and that he feels that this would be a good idea, but that you and your mom have already tried this to no avail and if you were to give their names you feel the trouble would get worse. If this doesn't work hun then I'm sorry that your friends are being so sucky, but just remember he cant force you to tell and if you really do feel that its in your best interest not to then good luck I know what like "friends" like that can be and I hope that it either gets resolved or you find new better friends!!
Good luck and I hope I helped even if the advice was a little rubbish!!
Dxxxxxxx
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