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What happened? OK let me start from the beginining:
I was set up with this guy by my best friend. He is so cute and nice and I was starting to really get into him, but then he got too into me (i.e. he wrote all about me on his xanga and profile and invited me to prom on our 2nd date and he called like once if not twice a day at least.) So i had a talk with him telling him that I felt we were moving extremley fast and there was no reason for that so he took it so well and totally agreed, he even said "yeah I agree, I thought I might have been coming on very strongly." So everything was good and he laid off just a little bit. we hung out again not last saturday, but the saturday before and everything was fine but he hasnt called me since. When I go online and he's online, he doesn't IM me. I texted him yesterday and he didnt text me back (he is always good with returning my texts within like an hour.)
I really do like this guy, and I don't know what to do now. Can someone please give me advice (I don't want to sound desperate, so thats why I'm not calling him. I assume that if he's not calling me, there is a reason). Please help me. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I'll rate high.
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Hello there,
If you tell a guy to layoff, he will, if he is smart, let you make all the aggressive moves after that point.
He doesn't want you to think that he is coming on too strong anymore.
Basically you made him afraid to even say hello to you.
Best thing to do is to sit down with him and tell him what exactly he was doing that made you feel like he was coming on too strong.
The odds are, if you don't call him he will be afraid to call you because you might freak out on him. :-)
DangerNerd. ]
Well you did tell him to lay off a bit. Maybe he doesn't really know where the happy medium enlies.. You don't want to seem really picky, I understand that, but maybe you should text "hey? where are you?" you know? I think dropping suttle little hints will give him a point.. he seems like a really nice guy... ]
maybe he's just been busy with friends and stuff, don't stress it. ]
It sounds like this guy took what you said to him all wrong. He may have misinterpreted what you said to him, and what you wanted him to do. Many times with communicating, what you say <b>is not always</b> what they hear. The only way to fix this is to talk to him again. I always support talking to someone in person, but if you are better at expressing your emotions/feelings in writing, then try IM'ing him first. Don't beat around the bush, tell him straightforward how you are feeling and ask him what he thought you meant by saying that he was coming on too strongly. Guy's egos are very fragile, and it could be that he took your statement as a form of rejection, instead of you wanting to be comfortable with him first before spending too much time with him. Obviously he likes you a lot because he wrote about you in his journal. And how many guys do you know keeps a journal, let alone talks about the one they like in it? I still think that this can be repaired, but talk to him as soon as possible. ]
you brought it upon yourself, it was going too fast and now its too slow?? make up your mind ]
Tell him straight out how you feel and what you're thinking. Tell him that you miss hearing from him and that you miss his calls. Tell him its always nice to get a call from him. Make him feel as important as he is in your heart(if that makes sense, good. if not im sorry lol) xO ali ]
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