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paranoid?
[note: this will be long]
I'm 19/f he's 20/m.
I've been with my boyfriend for what will be 3 years in August and I love him very much. But sometimes I can't help but think things like what if another girl comes along that appeals to him and will take him away from me?
My boyfriend always reassures me that he will never cheat, and I believe him for the most part, it's just that I can't help thinking these morbid thoughts. He's a people person who gets along with everybody. But as you know some girls mistake being nice with flirting...and I'm afraid that his social skills might get him into trouble someday.
We don't live as close to each other and don't get the opportunity to see each other as often as we'd both like. He lives a half hour away and we only see each other on the weekends. I don't know if I'm being paranoid or what, but I've never thought such things before...why all of a sudden now?
Some say I'm just overreacting but sometimes I don't know what to think. I am a good girlfriend who's stuck by him through everything and supported him through his ambitions; I don't restrict him and let him go out with his guy friends; I'm moderately attractive; the sex is good...so odds of leaving me are very slim unless there is another part of a guy's standards that I'm not fulfilling? Even so, what can I do to banish these thoughts? And can someone tell me WHY am I even thinking such thoughts when I should have no reason to...?
Thanks!
-Devoted
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It's natural to feel insecure sometimes.
The thing is everything will most likely be fine.If you both love each other then you just can't worry about it 24/7, it will make you nuts.
You just have to trust him to handle it if some girl takes his being friendly the wrong way.
I don't know why you are having these feelings all of a sudden.Is he somehow treating you diffrentley? You just can't dwell on what might happen in the future.I don't know how to tell you not to do this, you just have to.Trust.
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Have faith in your love.
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These questions may be coming frm your own past behavior. My question "Why pick a peoplw person if you are not?' My suggesstion is to consult a qualified MSW Therapist. I am a people person and we all know they come in two genders. Just because he talks to "people" does NOT mean he wants them sexually. If your relationship is goodenough to ask thie question it should be "good enough" to seek professional help. I did and it no only gave me peace of mind, I found out just what "didn't work" with and about me
Blessings
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Devoted,
I think that your paronia is getting the best of you. You have nothing to worry about you have been together for 3 years now and he has yet to cheat on you. Your proabably just letting your insecurities get the best of you. You love him so much and after three years you dont want to lose him. To me it seems normal. I tihnk after fateing someone for 3 years we all began to think like that. As for banishing these thoughts they'll go away with time and confidence. hope ive helped.
x0 - Chenise
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Dear Devoted,
Funny thing about trust. It requires a little bit of faith. Also, a funny thing about thoughts, you begin to feel them and then you start acting them out. First thing, learn to control your thoughts. If your boyfriend is going to leave you, which judging by your letter, I don't believe he's planning on it, what you are thinking right now will drive him away faster than anything else. When you have these doubts, I don't believe it's him that you're worried about. You are doubting yourself. Try to do things and think thoughts that make you feel better about yourself. Wear clothes that make you feel comfortable, happy and good about yourself. Smile. Be friendly. Be positive, in your thoughts and your actions. Everybody has doubts, however, give yourself some credit. You sound like a great girlfriend and I'm sure he realizes it. Please, please, please, just make an effort not to act upon your doubts. Good luck!
Lindacht
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your just worried and u love him s0o much thta u dont want to lose him! you just care about him a lot and dont want to lose him! good luck! =) x0x
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