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I've read all the "how do you know you're in love" questions in the archive, and I've asked a few friends, and all the situations involve either knowing immediately or not knowing for a couple of years. My Boyfriend and I have been going out almost a month now, and I *think* I'm falling in love with him. the thing is, people keep telling me "you'll just know... love isn't rational". I'm an overly analytical person. I need evidence.
And i've never had a boyfriend before, and he's never had a girlfriend before, so we have no experience to base this on. to be honest, I'm not sure how we knew what we were doing the first time we made out. As far as background goes, we were friends for over a year, I agreed to go to his prom as a friend (my exact words were "If you're desperate, I'll go with you," to which he responded "I was going to ask you, but I didn't think you'd want to go"). whenever one of us called the other to iron out the details, we just kept talking. our first date was the friday after his prom. we both entered this completely inexperienced, and plan to wait until marriage for sex. Now, I know I love him... I don't know how. That is, am I in love? is this a mutual crush? are we just really close friends with a some lust thrown in? I want to figure this out before I bring it up with him. this is a big deal and I refuse to use the L word until I'm absolutely sure. That's why I need all the help I can get :) and maybe I'm just going about this all wrong.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
hmm thats a bit tricky. because he is your first boyfriend you cant be sure that you even know what love is. Plus the fact that y'all have only been dating for a month...? i dont think thats quite enough time to know for sure. your probably just experiencing an infatuation where you think your in love with him when its nothing more than the euphoria of having a boyfriend and that euphoria is even more intense because he's your first boyfriend. my advice...take it slow and see what happens and check back after a few months, and even better, a few years to see if it lasted.
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Or maybe you're going about it all right. I must agree with you that Love is a word not to be taken with a grain of salt. But you two sound like a great couple. It's, not only awesome, but very responsible of you two to wait until marriage before having sex.You said you have known one another for a year now, and that's great you picked someone who knows you well. Now you say you know you love him but you don't know if it's really lust or a crush. Well, look at the chances of it being lust and the chances of it being a crush. Lust is always a sexual attraction, but you say you do not plan to have sex until your married ("people applauding") so it's most likely not lust. A crush is a strong, temporary feeling of attraction, you've known each other for a year and then you developed feelings for one another so it's probalay not a crush either. You very well might truly love him. Look at these qualities in him: do you think he'd make a good father? does he always look at you best interest? will he always be there for you? does he share the same beliefs you do? If all these were a yes, I can't see how you wouldn't truly love him. Love isn't always accompanied by a rapid heart rate, a fluttering stomach, and uncontrollable breathing,because that feeling is temporary. I'm not your only resource on information of love (true love that is) if you read 1Corinthians 13: 4-13 it tells you all the properties true love has. You two sound like there is a future in your relationship, but there's no need to rush to say you love him he should be able to pick that up already.
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Love is something people dont find the meaning for until there married -- And even after that it takes a few years -- Its hard to ask someone if youre in love because your the on in the relationship, Its kind of a feeling of missing them when you havent talked to them or seen them, knowing there the person you wanna be with, that theres no one else out there that could make you feel the exact same way -- But when you've only been with one person you question it, like how do i know if i havent been with anyone else -- Youll know if your in love or not (ok so i just said the same thing everyone else did lol) Its a great feeling of happiness, joy, and your just glad to be with them...
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If this is your first boyfriend and his first girlfriend, more than likely your just over reacting to how much you like him, theres a 1% chance you love him and will want to be with him forever, you have a lot more boyfriends to come in the future, dont make a mistake and tell him you love him this soon. Wait.. you'll see what I mean.
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