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So lonely..
I'm a really shy, boring, ugly girl. Don't say I'm not ugly, believe me, I look awful - frizzy hair, horrid skin, big teeth - you'd be sick if you saw me. I don't have a life. I don't ever go out or have fun anymore because the friends I have are so immature and I don't really like going out with them because they always end up bullying me or asking random guys out for me, it's so embarrassing, and the boys say something like, "No way, she's a minger". I can't make more friends because I hate talking so much and I feel sick just thinking about it. I have 2 best ever friends in the world but I moved house and I can only speak to them on the phone, I want to move back because I hate it here - but my mum won't budge. I really want a boyfriend and I'm lonely but I'm so ugly and boring that no guy would <u>ever</u> be interested. Why is it I'm so ugly, what have I done to deserve this? I hate being me. I don't know what to do because I can't change the way I look and I've always been shy. I'm 14 and never had a bf, and I know I'm not the only one who hasn't but I feel ready. No boy would ever like me :/ I don't really see the point in life because I never have fun, every week is the same, and my grades are slowly going down at school because I can't sleep at night any more. I just want to feel loved.. sorry if that sounds pathetic but that's what I feel like. They say there's someone for everyone out there, but I guess some people were made to be single. I don't want to be single, and with Valentine's Day coming up I feel even more depressed. Also if you can help, I really need to 'let myself go', like I want to have fun but I get worried I'll look stupid so I don't do it, how can I stop being scared of everything Sorry I have so many stupid problems but please help :'(
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ya, i feel real bad for you, get braces, lose weight, get some frizease and it'l all work out, try not to be so imbaressed by things either, if you act more confident and wash your hair you'l be super popular, read alot of books and act super smart and people will hate you so that will be coool, ps love you will you marry me and my chicken
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You don't sound pathetic. I felt this EXACT same way for about two or three years. When I was 14 (Which was last year, lol) I still never had a boyfriend either. It's okay...some people bloom late and some bloom early. Some people grow like weeds and some people grow like trees. Kind of corny, but it's true! It hurts, but the depression phase WILL go away. I'm not just saying this to make you feel better, I've experienced it myself. At this very moment my bestfriend is going through it too.
I'm sure there IS a boy that will love you for who you are. I'm not saying you'll find him in two days, or two years, who knows when he'll come. I'm just saying you will find him in time. In the meantime, you need forget about boys. Find some cool friends to hang out with. Be happy. Friends and laughter take your mind off of everything. Why must our lives have boys to make us happy? Find some NEW friends, GOOD friends. There ARE people that will instantly click with you and they WON'T treat you like trash. You just have to be willing enough to find them. Don't be afraid to try new things to meet new people. If you never took a risk you'd never get anywhere. Concentrate on school and getting those straight A's. Good grades definitely get me cheered up. Clubs, clubs, clubs, and community service. They keep you occupied from bad thoughts, and you might meet some new people.
Feeling ugly is horrible, and I've felt ugly before, even if people told me I wasn't. Even if you aren't ugly there is nothing people can do to change how you feel about yourself. So what I'm saying is, you're going to have to get your self esteem up yourself. Look in the mirror, pick out things you like about yourself. Come on, there must be at least one thing. It could be your eyes. ANYTHING. Make progress over time and get your self esteem up.
Wanting to feel beautiful isn't bad. With society these days it's hard to feel beautiful without doing so many things to yourself. You can try things like straightening your hair, getting braces, going to a dermatologist. Make up perhaps, but please don't go crazy with it. I prefer natural people...I think they are much more beautiful.
Maybe you just need someone to talk to someone in the meantime. Feel free to email or im me...I'd love to talk. Please do! You'd be doing both of us a favor =) (Email: hyperchick@gmail.com) (AIM: HyperactiveMiss)
Valentine's Day doesn't have to be about being with your boyfriend. Make it wonderful! Every day's a celebration. It could be hanging out with friends, spending time with family, or treating yourself like a queen and eating lots of sweets. =)
There are many theories about what the point of life is. Maybe it's to find who your true lover is. Maybe it's to spend your life surrounded by good family and friends. Maybe it's to make good memories. Maybe it's to reach heaven. Maybe you have your own destiny to forfill. I can't tell you what it is. But wouldn't you like to know what the point of life is? Don't you want to experience it? Then just get out there and maybe you'll run into it!
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Honey, at 14 you SHOULD be single, and not defining yourself by the attention of a boy. I know you're lonely, but here's what I did when I was 14, because I was fat, and no boy would look at me......I made friends through doing things I loved. I loved horses, so I'd save my allowance and rode on the weekends. I went to church, and joined the youth group. That led to weekend campouts, parties, etc., all without having a boyfriend. The Explorer scouts are for girls and boys, and have all kinds of interest groups. Make a list of things YOU LOVE TO DO, then find those groups in the phone book, or on line and connect yourself to the things you love. Meanwhile, ask your mom, or someone you trust, to take you to the dentist. The dermatologist can help with your skin, or call Mary Kay Cosmetics in the phone book, and ask for a free facial. I started using Mary Kay at your age, and it made a huge difference in my skin. They can show you how to put on make up too. Next, go to the local beauty college and see if they can give you suggestions on your hair. They might be able to straighten it for a fraction of what it would cost in the salon. If you can't do that, go to a local beauty supply , and explain you want to calm the friz in your hair. They might suggest using a perm, by combing the solution through your hair, letting it process, then rinsing. Follow that up with the neutralizer. Do this with an adult that can help you. This proceeder has helped many of my friends with curly, unruly hair. All this energy is going towards YOU, which should be the most important thing right now. You will be so busy finding out your passions in life, you won't care if boys are interested in you. Do this for now, and worry about boys later.....they are a lot of work, trust me.
Hope this helps..............Martita
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Sweetie,
I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself. It's so sad that you do, but don't feel bad. I feel the same way about myself but the only thing different is I have tons of guys hit on me and I have had tons of boyfriends but they only were dating me for the following reasons:
1. They so I'm SO "hot"
2. For sex or anything sexually *which none got*
3. Just because I'm such a great girlfriend and I fall for like everything that comes out of their mouth
Anyways...Sweetie you don't need a boyfriend to make you feel better about yourself. I have been single for 1 year and 1 month *tomorrow*. Trust me you don't need them they just cause pain, tears, and leave you heartbroken. Plus if you give them NOTHING they drop you like a hot potato(sp) or just cheat on you. I mean I don't know what to tell you to do because all of these things you think are mainly in your head you know. I have the same problems *all in my head* I mean some aren't but some are you know? I know I prolly just made you feel worse there and if I did I'm so so so so so sorry sweetie. Can you do me a big favor? Email me at miss_adriauna04@yahoo.com and tell me more about yourself and more of your problems I just might be able to help you and make you actually feel good about yourself with or without a boyfriend. By the way I'm 14 too.
~*Perfectly Imperfect*~
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Hey Girlie. keep your chin up.. Don't degrade yourself like that, there is a point to life and you will find someone and people that will like you for you. If people don't then they aren't worth it, trust me things will change for you, good things always come for those who wait.. I hope you feel better about yourself..Keep in Touch Itsallkaitlyn I hop I helped u!
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Wow, your story really did touch me, you sound sooo much like me it's not even funny. You know, I've only had one bf in my life, and that was a year ago, and now I am lonely too. Yeah like what you said, You gotta let go, and also let god. My friends and I call it "Let Go, and Let God" Let god handle things in your life. When he's ready for you to have a boyfriend, then sure enough he'll be right there in your face. You need to go out, have fun...I know it's hard when your alone but the more you worry about your problems, the sicker your gonna get. You need to be concerned about your schoolwork!!!! That's the most important thing! What if a man comes and decides he wants to leave, and you have kids, whose gonna take care of the children??? and how??? You've got to learn to love yourself too first. I don't like my looks and weight and all, but I have to deal with it. God made me like this for a reason, so I tuff it out. Even though it seems like you have no purpose, your here for a reason, and through God's eyes, were all special! So always remember that God Loves You and I do too! *sMiLeZ*, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here! I hope this somewhat helpz! God Bless And Beebyes!
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i am so glad you asksed this question i will be more than happy to help you being that i had this problem once look it really is all in self confidence u have to think you look good for other people t hink you look good trust me and for your hair try flat curlers and if that dosen't work you can pull it back in a pony tell and wrap it around like a bun they are so cute and start wearing mabe tighter clothe trust you get used to it but if you have a little wieght on you you can still get tight stuff just not where it showing everthing you got and try wearing things that show you care about yourself like lipgloss or makeup if your parents allow it and it will take time to get out of the shy thing but you will eventually and once people start noticing you and wanting be your friend the shyness will go awa easily if want i could be your frien i know everyoone needs one so you email me personall at bowsghettogurl02@yahoo.com
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You need a confidence boost. Guys don't like girls who are always hard on themselves. Talk with your mom and your real friends' moms. See if you guys can get together sometime because it would deffienatly help you to see some people who can listen to you. Maybe your school consuler could help you with the low self estem. To get a guy just be yourself. Go up to him and ask him with confidence. You will find someone. I hope I helped! ♥ good luck
P.S.- Use this quote from a song. One of my best teachers who left to be a school guidence consuler had us listen to a song that had this in it on her last day. It helps me and it can help you:
"Now can't you see life's easy if you look at things in another way in another point of view"
Good luck with everything!
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It sounds to me like you have low self-esteem, and those so-called friends of yours aren't helping. First of all, go look at yourself in the mirror, and tell yourself, "I am beautiful and intellegent, and any boy who can't see that doesn't deserve me." You should talk to your counselor at school, and possibly ask your doctor to recommend a therapist for you--I think you're bordering on depression.
As for your friends, either stand up for yourself and tell them not to do those things that hurt you, or (my personal recommendation) dump them and find new friends who like you for you. Join some clubs at school, go out for sports or a play--whatever interests you. Yes, high school is rough, but you'll get through it. Good luck.
--Jaede
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