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Friend vs. Boy
I put a question like this on here a few days ago, but I'll go over whats going on again.
My friend and I both liked a guy, then I backed off so she could have him, then she didn't want a bf. So I stepped up and now I like him and he likes me and outa no where she says she likes him again, so I told her I liked him too and now shes all wierd about it. I told her I didn't want a bf though, and now me and Andy (the guy) have been hanging out alot and I really like him, and when I come home from our dates I hear "Amanda really likes Andy, what are you doing?" and stupid stuff like that. What the hell am I supposed to do? I mean I can't control my feelings, and she had her chance with him. And I'm not going to date him right now anyways b/c I want to get to know him...so people are making it into a lot bigger deal than it is...what do I do?
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niknik is totally rite.. she had her chance n u gotta tell her that.. say "Amanda, you had ur chance with him.. and you know that we really like each other a lot.. i repect you enuf as a friend to have backed off but now your not doing anything so since i like him.. i thought id take a shot' *hope i helped* love alwaiiz, aLi
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it seems like your friend wants to have her cake and eat it to...like thats how it was with me and my Ex best friend...she had a boyfriend who she loved and he loved her although she wanted to have every guy and like she wanted to put her name on all of them...and if i liked someone she would say she liked them knowing that she had a boyfriend and i was single and unhappy...it seems to me like your friend doesnt care if your happy...and she has the same name as your friend "Amanda" but anyways just talk to her and tell her that she cant have her cake and eat it to...and that she should be a friend to you and want you to be happy...and that she cant say she likes someone one day and then find out you had a better chance with him then she did and then go off and get mad at you for likeing him when she said she didnt then changed her mind...tell her stright up that you like him and he likes you and if she cant be happy for you then shes not a true friend...this guy could be the love of your life or even someone who you may marry someday so just talk to her and tell her how you feel.
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ok-tell your bestfriend to back down a little-tell her you told her she could have him and she didnt take the chance-its her lose-and its your turn-tell her you love her but its not fair because she had her chance and blew it-
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if you like him, and he likes you, go with it. she should be happy for you because that's what you did for her.
you're right. it is your turn. take it and run with it. tell her that if she didn't want to be with him that's her choice, however, she shouldn't infringe on yours. and tell everyone else that they have no place in your personal life like that. if they have a problem with who you like and who it bothers, they can keep those opinions to themselves. everyone has the right to be happy.
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You are perfectly right in everything you are doing. Don't rush into things with Andy, because it could ruin your friendship with Amanda. Talk to Amanda about it and be like you know im just friends with andy, right, because i wouldn't steal a guy you liked away from you. since she seems to change her mind alot, she'll probably never go out with him, or stay with him long, and by then, you'll have a good relationship with him. Or,you could tell her "you said you didn't want a boyfriend, but i did, i'm sorry if i hurt your feelings". It sounds like your relationship with Amanda is more important that the one you share with Andy, and you shouldn't be quick to dump a friend like her.
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ok first off, you shouldn't put him 'before' her.. bc she IS ur best friend.. BUT, you were a good friend in giving her her chance w/ him and she blew it. That's her fault, you shouldnt be held responsible for her 'change of heart'.. Also, my advice would be to be totally open. If you said 'i dont want a bf' just to get her off your back, its going to upset her a lot more later on down the rd. when ya'll inevitably get together. Just be honest w/ her and let her know that you value her as a friend but you have to go with your feelings. If she's a true friend she'll be there forever, if not, you've done nothing wrong and you've cut your losses.
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