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Is he gay?
Ok, I am 44 yrs. old and my husband is 47, we have been married about 6 months, and are professonal decent people. My problem is my husband is not interested in making love to me, when we first married, we had a decent sex life,. then no more for the past several months. If I bring it up he gets mad. Says hes just tired,or could be his antidepressants he takes, etc.. But he has time to be internet addicted, and reads a lot, anything to keep from being with me. I had caught him on the net several times talking to men, over a year ago, but he had a excuse for that, he was "just messing" with the gay guys for a laugh. Now I wonder. Ive tried talking to him but about this, but he dosent want to discuss it. So what do I do? I love my husband dearly but what do I do, Lonely
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I believe you know the answer to your question.
Don't be a victim, trust your instincts, get some counseling. This has EVERYTHING to do with you...and less about him. If you have a relationship where you address a concern and you get "blown off" for WHATEVER reason. The burden goes to you. I wish you luck and strength and the faith in yourself to be happy.
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Give him time to figure it out. It's probly really tough for him to be going through this if he is gay. And if he is, he needs to know you're be there for him. If he's not, I'm sure things will be back to normal soon.
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siNce he qeTs mad Over the subject yOu shOuldn`t pressure him into talkinq abOut it. I dOn`t think he`s qay..and i cerTainLy hOpe he isn`t qay but if yOu susPect that then i think yOu shOuld check intO it withOut him knOwinq. He seems paranOid abOut the discussiOn sO i think yOu shOuld let him take his time answerinq..he`sz qOinq tO qet mad either way-yOu miqht as well jusT tell him hOw yOu feel..
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The lack of sex can be a product of anti-depressants.
Don't let this get you down. I'm sure your husband cares about you. You don't need to question that, but perhaps he is trying to escape from what really is bothering him by distracting himself with things such as the internet.
Since you are not specific, I have a few theories in mind I would like to share with you.
It's possible he is questioning his sexuality or WAS and now he is making an effort to escape that. Having you around might be a constant reminder of his possible conquest.
If anything has changed in his life recently, either than your marriage to him, it may have a lot to do with the stress levels. Has anything changed in his life lately? A new job? A disagreement ?
Depression and anxiety can leave people feeling insecure and unwanted. It's MORE possible that he is fearful you might leave him and has such irrational thoughts in his head. Some people react as unusual as ignoring their partner or escaping to different areas of the house or anywhere and anything else in order to contain this fear within the walls.
Just be understanding. Don't pressure him. Give him lots of hugs and give him a reason to open up to you, even though you are husband and wife.
Still try to discuss it with him. When he gets mad, just try to talk to him calmly and show physical affection. Such intimacy allows people to open up more.
If more trouble occurs, then I would definitely recommend a couples therapist. No they're not just for troubled couples, but for healthy ones as well. Sometimes, the best solution is to get help from a professional who can improve your marriage through actual human-to-human contact.
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You might want to check into marriage counseling. Tell him he either needs to go to counseling with you, or tell you what the problem is. You are his wife, you deserve to know what's going on with him, don't take no for an answer. Him avoiding the situation isn't going to fix anything.
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may be your husband is gay(as u sed uve caught him tlkn to guys). i mean im only 15 years old so i dont know what its like to be married but i do know about sex. maybe its just getting boring for him so go look at books and stuff and see if he wants to try any new postions or something.. hope i helped good luck hope thinkgs get better!
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ok i think hes gay.but ya never know maybhe just likes messin around with them.i dont advice you to ask him about that how about while hes on the internet chating wih the gay people go to another computer with the same website and look at what he writes mayb its not a good idea after all.and i think its weird that a man doesnt want to have sex with his wife.i dont know if this is a good thing to day but mayb hes cheatin on you or mayb hes just gay or mayb i dont know.
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i think he is gay..and is embarresed to tell u
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lOnLeY~
talk to your husband about your suspicions. could be that he isnt lying. but why would he mess with gay guys just for a laugh? tell him how you feel and why you feel that way and i'm sure he'll understand. alot of gay guys "use" women as a cover up that they are not gay so that may be the case. orrr maybe hes just getting old and his desire for sex is decreasing... (viagra any1?) u said that hes on the internet alot... do what my older sister's friend did when she suspected her bf was gay.. i know that this may be considered "snooopy" but she went on his computer and saw what he was actually doing on the internet. i probably wanst alot of help.... but i hope i helped ya a little bit! good luck! xOxO, aLeX
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