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I think I'm being avoided.
I work at FedEx and there's this guy that got hired on the same time I did. We became friends, and we've seen each other outside of work but strictly as friends. Now, for no reason at all, he's stopped talking to me. He goes into work a different way so I don't see him. He doesn't talk to me online, and when he sees me online, he puts up an away message. I figure he's met someone but I thought we were just friends so that shouldn't matter. I hate feeling like someone is avoiding me like a plague, especially when I didn't do anything. What's going on?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?
So, have you heard of pod-people?
No, really, people are assholes all the time, for all kinds of different reasons. Maybe you said/did something that hurt his feelings, without even realizing it. Maybe he's confused about his feelings for you and, in light of his new relationship, isn't sure how you fit into the picture. Maybe he's just a jerk.
If you really value this particular friendship, you might consider sending out some sort of feeler. Not a stalk-you-down, "I followed you to work yesterday and saw you went in the back way to avoid me" way...but just in a "Hey, how's it going? I get this vibe from you recently, like you'd rather not hang out/talk, and I was wondering if there's anything going on that we could talk about, or if you just maybe need a little space right now?" way.
If you get the feeling that the new Significant Other is the problem, maybe help him straighten out the difference between a love-life and a friendship by interacting with him in neutral territory. I.e., instead of those long heart-felt talks on your instant-messenger, invite him to a baseball game with you and your friends. Keep your topics neutral and wait for him to realize that he misses your friendship enough to figure out his problems.
If, on the other hand, he continues to blow you off with no explanation, try to find a way to move on. Friends who drop you like a hot-potato the second they get some lovin' from someone else are not really very good friends at all. And how many bad friends do you really need?
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Well, I can't tell you exactly what's going on. Seems like you know the basic jist of the problem: he's avoiding you and you don't like it. My best advice is confront him about it until you get a straight answer. He could just be having a bad day or week or month, he could just be waiting for you to seek him out. The only way you'll know is if you ask HIM.
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Make a point to go out of your way to bump into him and be like, "Hey, man! Where've you been? I haven't seen you for a while! How're you doing?" etc etc. Keep a friendly tone. Don't overwhelm him though. Make it a point somewhere in your conversation that you didn't expect a relationship out of anything, but would like to retain the friendship. Keep the encounter lighthearted and brief, and hopefully you'll get the answers you want.
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If he's avoiding you, then clearly he is not worth your time. Move on. Guys just aren't worth the stress. Even if they are just friends.
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I guess someone is spreading rumors about you.
I hate that. I have plenty of guys who are freinds and have been accused of liking them liking them (if you get what i mean).
I reccomend talking to him and asking why. Be sure to mention that you realize you two are JUST FREINDS but you want to know why he's avoiding you.
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Let him off for a while, maybe he has some personal issues or problems to get over and wants to be alone for awhile. If he doesn't start being warm to you again, talk to him straight up and ask him why he's been ignoring you.
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