sabrinax's advice column

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Q: Ok 14f and I have this friend that is just perfect. Not perfect in looks though, but ive gotten pass that. I feel like hes a good friend and a great person. And I luv him. but thats luv as for friends and family. Sometimes I cant help but question if I like him or not. I wouldnt say I do but its deep down inside that questions it. One day I was talking to him and he was carrying something for me and as he was near me but I was talking with my friend, I couldnt help but think "wow I luv this kid more and more each day" and funny thing is I almost blurted it out until i realized what i was thinking and that he might of heard. im so confused. Because.. When do I know when LUV turns into LOVE ?

people usually say love is a hard thing to determine. i think it is very easy once you meet the RIGHT person. now this person might not be "mr. Right" or "mr. Perfect" but you will know you LOVE them.

I cant really tell you if it is love or not, but i can tell you how i think i am in love. I can say that i love my boyfriend. i trust him, i want him close all the time, i want to spend the rest of my life with him, and the feelings i get in my "heart" just tell me that i am in love. And btw, i am in a long distance relationship but i still feel this. Now you might not feel exactly these things, but people love others for different reasons. Sometimes i actually, literally FEEL love.

If you wanna go for it, start flirting or talk about boyfriends/girlfriends with him and see what his thoughts are. I always tell people life is a crazy random thing and sometimes you have to take chances, or just plain do what you want.

Q: does anyone know where i can get cute internet graphics such as these:

http://i140.photobucket.com/albums/r24/vaviolet112/dream.gif

and

http://s140.photobucket.com/albums/r24/vaviolet112/?action=view¤t=z118632177-1.jpg

and

http://i140.photobucket.com/albums/r24/vaviolet112/closeyoureyes.jpg

any website that doesnt contain "glitter graphics" would be nice and ones that have things similar to those above would be greatly appreciated.

go to google and search "myspace xanga graphics". because xanga usually has people who make sites with text and picture graphics like those. there are also blogrings you can click on which take you to other xanga sites with graphics.

Q: 15/f
ok so i used to date this boy--Brent. we were together for a year and a half on and off. he was my first love but he was also a pothead. well one night at our school's homecoming game bonfire, he got high and decided to blurt out to my step-sister Brittany that he had cheated on me. at least thats what she says; he denies it. well this was about a year ago. since then ive dated his friend--Cody. and Cody and i had this thing over the summer where we were talking and long story short-he turned out to be a complete butthole. well im still not completely over Cody but lately Brittany has been trying to get me to give Brent another chance and he was myspace-messaging my best friend; Amber trying to find out if i still liked him. so i messaged him and asked why he was bugging my friend. well we had this big long talk about how hes still in love with me and he was begging for another chance; even tho i told him i couldnt go through that again. well i dont like him anymore but i dont know how to tell him. but on the other had, i kinda want to give him another chance. Brittany and Brent both say that hes done with pot and everything but im scared. thank you if you took the time to read this long question and please help!

Everyone will probably think - if you go back with him, you will make a mistake and get hurt again. Or if you dont then he will get hurt.

I never think that way though. what i will ask myself is "what do i feel like doing?". if you dont want to go back with him, don't. say f*** it and forget about it. if you do, and you still have feelings for him, go for it! life is a crazy random thing sometimes you have to take chances.

Make sure you find out exactly how detailed this cheating explanation was, ask the girl too, make sure you find out before you make your decision.

also think about whether or not you dont want to deal with a changed personality while he is doing pot. i say this because people who quit pot usually do it once in a while. now this isnt everyone, but usually it is the case. you MIGHT have to deal with another sudden "blurt out" if you ever go out with him.

take all these things into account and make your decision based on what YOU want.

Q: hey i have ares 2.0 and i want to move the songs from that library to the apple itunes..thanks for your help p.s i tried dragging the songs to the library and it doesnt work

thanks a lot!

i'm not sure what ares 2.0 is. In itunes, when you want to upload songs, you go to file >> add to library and select the file.

if you have the music files saved into your computer, you can do that easily. but if ares has the music files built into the program (hard to explain) then you can't do what i mentioned above. if you can't get the music files out of ares, go to my computer or my documents and there should be a search bar. type in the name of one song and it will search your computer for that file name. take that file and upload it into itunes.

sorry if it doesn't work, but i hope i helped!
sabrina

Q: ok so i heard this song and i know part it's like "i'm trusting you and i'm taking the long way home" or something then it's like "but baby we're invincible" does anyone know who sings this song and what it's called if so please tell me thanks in advance

the artist is A Rocket to the Moon and the song name is Baby, we're invincible

here are the lyrics:
http://www.seekalyric.com/song/Rocket_To_The_Moon__A/Baby__We_re_Invincible

hope i helped!

Q: is there anyway to stop emails, like arcamax always emails me and i dont want it to anymore i dont even know what it is!!!

before you open the emails or do anything, get a virus program for your computer if you don't already have one -- you can download one off of download.com

search around your email program and see if there are any options to block certain addresses. if not, open the email (after scanning it for viruses/making sure its ok) and see if theres somehting in it that says "stop sending me blah blah" or "do not email me newsletters" or anything like that written in the actual email itself. theyre usually links, which lead to where you can cancel something.

if nothing works, make a new email address. you can use your aim screename @aim.com, like "example@aim.com" would be your email if example was your sn. you can also use hotmail, yahoo, or search around the web for free email providers.

and finally, if you don't feel like making a new email, search google for "stop emails" or "block emails", you can probably find out there too :)

hope i helped!

Q: So, I met this amazing girl about 6 months ago and she's my very good friend now. Erm, she has a twin sister that I'm pretty good friends with but still not as good as a friend then her sister. Sooo I was wondering, at their birthday [Sweet 16], should I get only my really good friend a present or should I get her twin sister one too? I have never had twin friends so I don't know if I just get one of them one or both or if I get them totally different or similar things or a more "better" gift for my really good friends and a lesser one for her twin sister. AHHH what do I do with the presents??????

DEFINITELY get them both presents. even if you don't know the other twin as well, she would probably get upset that she didn't recieve anything. you could try giving them both gift cards, but to different places. you could get them the same thing (purse, jewlery, etc) but in different colors. i got two of my twin friends the same handbag with different type patterns on it. so basically, get them each one thing and don't make the two presents really different from eachother. or give them what everyone likes, money! (same amount though!)

hope i helped!

Q: i can't wear sandals or flip flops to school because my feet start to sweat really bad, is there something i can do to fix this?

i have the same problem, it annoys me alot. don't get any of the 'old navy' flip flops because those leave nasty sweat marks. get a pair of flip flops that look like they are basket/woven, like tropical kinda, from roxy or billabong. pacsun (in the mall) would probably have flipflops like that. i find those are the best with my kind of feet. when i wear ballet flats, i usually wear those really short socks that just cover your toes and back of your foot so you can't see it when you wear the shoe. good luck!

Q: I just found a Cartier gold clock, shaped like a bear, in my room. According to my parents, I got it for my thrid birthday from a friend(eleven years ago.) I was wondering if anyone knew how much it was worth?

ps PLEASE don't tell me to google it.

you should probably get it appraised. try taking it to a jewlery specialist, one who specializes in cartier, or an antique appraiser. check your local listings (yellow book) for appraisers.

Q: this is kind of vague, but what kind of shoes are in right now? not more than $100 plz. also, i would appreciate links or sites. thanks in advance!

flats, peekaboo shoes (shoes that have a small opening that show your toes), and pvc shoes are in. pvc shoes are like shiny shoes (not loafers though!!). mary janes are also cute, and for boots-avoid fur. also avoid chunky heels for any type of shoe.

some great sites are:

alloy.com
stevemadden.com
nordstrom.com
delias.com (similar to alloy)
ninewest.com

what i would do is subscribe to a couple of store catalogs or look at catalogs or online pictures. you can get some great ideas and everything that is shown in new catalogs are up to date.

good luck!

Q: Okay well i have a boyfriend and he loves me and cares for me and stuff but he wants to kiss me but i dont know if im ready i toled him i would but i keep puting it off . then i get pressured to do it my my friends anna, emma, and meagan. They all have boyfriends and they kiss. Do i have a problem that i cant kiss my boyfriend or not cuz i really want to kiss him. i just dont know how i should or how long. HELPPPPPP!!!!!

you don't have to do anything that you dont want to. dont do anything that doesn't feel right, just go with your gut feeling. your friends aren't real friends. they should be supporting you, and understanding you, not pressuring you. if you let them convince you to do this now, they can convince you to do even worse things in the future because they know you're vulnerable/weak. talk to your boyfriend about this. if he doesn't want to be with you because of this, whatever. if he cares about you, he should be able to wait for you. you do not have a problem, everyone is ready to do different things at different times. if you really want to do something instead of kissing, just hug. hugs from friendly hugs to intimate hugs are another way of showing you care, but remember, you dont have to do this either. always go with your gut feeling. don't do anything uncomfortable.

hope i helped!

Q: i did this graffiti thing on my wall in acryllic paint and i dont like it anymore but its huge so i dont know what to do about it! i cant paint over it because i cant get the paint. what can i do?????

well, there are several things you can do.

you can paint the WHOLE room a new color, to just start fresh.

you can also paint some walls one color, and keep the old walls the same color. this only looks good if you ask an expert for a color scheme (palette) that looks good together or else it just looks like a mess.

you can also hire a professional painter, or someone who paints big murals/pictures to paint a huge painting over your graffiti. i'm not sure how much these cost, check the yellowbook or your local listings under painters, painting, murals, etc.

try wallpaper. ive never used it before, so ask an expert for help.

you can make a collage of posters/pictures of your interests over it.

before you do something new, make sure it is something that you will like in the future and ask people at the home improvement store. ive made this mistake before by painting my walls magenta! haha

good luck!

Q: How can I become more motivated to exercise? Please can you give me as many opptions as posible. Because I have tried and i just cant become motivated enough. :[

the only option that people haven't said is to go to a hypnotist. (it sounds crazy, but i heard it works). you tell him/her what you want to get in your mind and they say things while you are asleep to get it into your head, and then wakes you up. of course, this will cost money but it is very effective. hope i helped!

Q: im 14/f about 5'3" or 5'4" and around 125 pounds. i just want to lose a little bit of fat, which my guess is about 5 or 10 pounds. i want to drop those pounds at least by summer. im trying out for lacrosse in 2 weeks, i dont know if i will make it because i have a blood disorder (thalassemia) its a type of anemia it just makes me get tired a lot faster than everyone else but i have been in training for about 12 weeks and for the most part i did alright. i think that would be good exercise if i make it, but if i dont, or for when i dont have practice, are there any good cardio exercises you would recommend that wont wear me out as fast as running? or will they all be equally hard? and for food, i find myself snacking a lot after school and then not being hungry at dinner. how can i fix that? is there a specific food i can eat a small portion of for a snack that will hold me over till dinner? and also im not sure if this is true but i heard when you lose weight your boobs go first? is that right? wouldnt want that lol. thanks

take kickboxing classes. theyre great because you can go at your own pace and you sweat like a dog. seriously! I just started it and i want to lose some fat by summer, its a great excersize, and they're usually not that expensive. for food, take small baggies and fill them with like a couple pretzels, maybe some with carrots or celery, or fruit. when you're done with the baggy, you're done. then jsut go do somethng to keep you occupied unti dinner. your boobs eventually get A LITTLE smaller, but its not like a huge change. because you have fat in there that is burned. its not going to change your cup size or anything, it should be just a small change. hope i helped & feel free to leave one in my inbox!

Q: Okay. So I sweat really, really badly. Even when I'm not doing anything, just sitting around in school. I have this gross disgusting sweatmarks by 1st period and it's so nasty!!! It makes me feel really, really uncomfortable. I use deoderant (Ban) and everything...what can I do??

aahh, my best friend has the same problem, lol. try buying better quality deodorant, because ban won't give you the help you need. if NOTHING helps, you should go to the doctor's. you may have excessive sweating and would need special treatments (like there are botox injections into your arms, for example). I would go to the doctor anyway. Try not to wear dark colors like black, brown, navy, etc, because sweat shows up clearer on dark colors. instead wear bright colors, to help hide the mark (it works). hope i helped!

Q: Ughh. I have an allergy disease, so everytime the weather changes drastically, I get awfully sick. So I'm dealing with this, and a sucky cold at the same time. ANYWAY my point is, I have this mucus bubble in my ear. Well, I think everyone has one, but mine's swollen I guess and it's really bothering me. Does anyone know of anyway that I can pop it? Or cure it? SOMEHOW?! I've tried yawning and burping haha..anyway
Thanks.

try popping it using a q-tip. or first, try to find it using one of those mirrors that you can adjust. you can usually get it at a weird angle, but it works. if you can't pop it, try dabbing a q-tip into astringent or any other face/acne cleaner and just put some on it. it will reduce the size in a couple hours. if nothing works, just don't think about it, lol. it really helps--do something that will distract you or make you forget about it. hope i helped!

Q: okay i really want to change my eye color for a picture i need for school for a project and I cant find any site that will let me download a compete photo of me with a different eye color. I tried i-village, but it doesn`t show my whole body, just my face & photoshop is expensive & complicated. I mean I just want to upload it for free. Please help me I don't want to fail.

go to jasc.com, and you can download paint shop pro for free (the trial, 30 days long). you can open your picture in that program, use the selection tool to select the colored section of your eye, then go to edit>>hue and saturation. (it might be under a different tool then edit, but the effect is called hue and saturation) and adjust the bars so you get the color you want. hope i helped and good luck!

Q: Ok this is kind of complicated. I am 13/f and all my friends have had 5+ boyfriends. I havent. I really like this one guy (lets call him James) and we flirt alot but hes also a close friend. I care for him so much. Well lately this month I have had about 4 guys ask me out. The problem is I DONT like them this way. My friends and other people are getting angry that im turning them all down but I feel as if if I go out with them im just lying to myself and not giving them what they deserve. They are all nice guys but I only like James. My friends are saying im being stupid and letting the chance to finnally have a boyfriend slip away. I have told them before that I wanted one but I want to share some sort of connection with the guy first. My friends all say its just a guy and I should just for the status but I dont know. Should I just forget about James and give these guys a chance? I have no idea...

no. don't forget about james, forget about those guys. you dont have to make yourself do ANYTHING that you're uncertain about, and especially being pushed into by friends. chances are, those guys only like you for your looks because they've never met you, and they haven't gotten to know you. james is someone you can trust to know you and it seems like you feel "right" when you are with him. your friends are trying to help you, but theyre putting wrong ideas into your mind. your friends don't value passion much, unlike you. it was right of you to turn down the other guys. don't rush anything and always go with what feels right. hope i helped! sabrina

Q: ok my sister is 16 and she wants to get a small tattoo of a peace sign down by her bikini line and she said some guy who's like thirty is gonna do it cus he does his own. i really dont want her to do it b/c its stupid and she's not telling our parents and they would definitly say no and everytime she does something bad and my parents find out its like a huge thing, my dad screams and yells and chases her out the front door, my mom freaks out and threatens to call the cops on my dad, my sister cries hysterically and me and my 8 year old brother sit together in my room and try not to panic too much. anyway i really dont want her to go through with it so what can i say to make her not?

well, tell her exactly what she told you back. like, emphasize how a 30 year old is going to be tattooing her bikini line. if it was me, i would be too scared to do that -- this sounds weird, but if she really doesn't listen, then scare her about the point that the guy is really 30 and you never know what he could do.

Q: Okay, so do you know what those little fuzzy things that are on shirts called? Like, you could have a shirt, all clean and stuff, but after a while it gets these little fuzzy thingies all over. Not lint or anything.. I actually have no idea what it's called. Hopefully, you understand me? & If you know what they are, why do they get there?

hmm i think its lint though. because you know those things called the 'lint rollers'? those are used to get the fuzzy things off the shirts. i know what you are talking about, and those usually go on sweaters/knits or dress clothes (well, mine at least). i know they transfer from other clothes to another in the laundry, and to get them off use a lint roller or some tape.

bio

hey everyone, my names sabrina (obviously)! i love playing tennis and i do kickboxing, and i play lots of video gamessss! ask me anything, i will be glad to help! sabrinaa