latinagurl256's advice column

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Q: ok well here it is i hadd sex 4 the very first time lyk 2 days ago and it hurt reeli badd...and i feel reeli gross...cuz im 13 and the guy lyk forced mii into doin it...wut should i do cuz i feel reeli discusted with mah self!!...and another problem is i want to become belemic cuz im fat and i hate mahh body its reeli gross every guy i lyk thinks im a cow and i reeli wanna break down and cry!! i feel so0o gross with mahh self

Dear "I have problems,"

What do you mean when you say the guy you had sex with forced you into doing it. Did he pressure you and you agreed or he completely forced you to have sex after you said no or stop. If he did then he raped you. If that's the case you should tell your parents of police immediately. Rape is a very seriousl issue. Also, you should not resort to making yourself throw up to lose weight. You shouldn't hate yourself instead you should learn to accept your body. If you want to lose weight the healthy way you should workout and eat healty foods. You should cut out junk food and fattening foods. Drink plenty of water. No one should make you feel bad about who you are of what you look like.

Good Luck:)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: hello.. im 14, and i've been having a lot of problems lately.. my parents have been fighting a lot for a while now and its mostly about me and my sister.. i always get yelled at for nothing and my dad gets mad so easily.. most of their fights r my fault cuz i always seem to do things to make them mad.. they yell at me for being on here too much but when i go by them they start fighting over something i say or just about anything.. also my sister has won herself the reputation of a whore.. and it bothers me because, arent u supposed to look up to ur sister? how am i supposed to look up to mine if she makes all these bad choices and lies all the time.. on top of all that my best friend found out i said something about her and shes pissed, i'm so stressed out over all this and when i get stressed i cut my wrists (any of u that read this.. dont start, i have sucha bad habit of cutting and it makes u emotionally depressed and it just makes everything worse) i no cutting is wrong but its sucha bad habit now i cant stop.. my head says it makes everything better but inside i because more depressed.. i think about suicide a lot but luckily i'm too chicken right now, i hate my life and sometimes i think that it would be easier to just pay someone to kill me.. my friends help me out and this guy that really likes me and i like is so worried about me and he said next time i cut hes telling my parents so the puts a lot of stress on me too.. its hard to quit such bad habits
i guess my question for u is.. what do i do with myself.. i need ur help.. please

Dear "Confused,"

I think you should really stop cutting. Even if it is a habit. One wrong cut on your wrist and you could kill yourself. About your parents you should really try talking to them and tell them how stressed out you are and that you're feeling really depressed. I'm sorry to hear about your sister's "reputation". Right now I don't think you should concern yourself with her problems. Just think about your health right now. You should think about the positive things going on in your life right now. Like that guy that likes you. Maybe a relationship can grow between the two of you. Even though he says he's going to tell your parents if you cut again he's only trying to look out for you the only way he knows how. Give him a chance.

Good Luck and I hope you get better :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: so i am goin into da 8th grade and my skin is tan and i have dark brown eyes .i dont kno which eyshadow to use, and i don't know what i shud do wit my hair, my hair is dark brown and is straight. please help.
I RATE :)

Dear "First day of school madness,"

Since you have brown eyes you should wear a light layer of gold eyeshadow. Gold really enhances brown eyes. As for your hair you could leave it straight but put half of it up in a really cute clip. That's what I do since I'm tan, have brown eyes, and brown (curly) hair too.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: Ok well me and this guy have been best friends since the 6th grade… im in the 10th now… We used to be so close… Everything we did was with each other and talked about everything… Well one day I get a letter from him (we used t write each other like every class) saying I think Im starting to like u again… I was like woah what do u mean again and I was so confused… Well we talked and he asked me out and I said yes… But going out with him was like umm dating a brother… And I broke up with him… He was so heart broken… But after that it was never the same… We never ended up being the same and it got worse and worse… We practically only say hi and bye now… Bu one day I was going through his folder and I found my pictures in the back flap of his folder and a four page letter saying how hurt he was and everything was about me… But its one of those notes that ur pretty much writing to ur self… And I was reading it and I was crying… But the other day I saw a picture of him and it brought every feeling I have ever felt for him back.. And its like haunting me… Everything I do reminds me of him and like in 8th grade I did like him a lot but I never told him and all this stuff is bugging me so much… And I found out he had a girlfriend I was so freakin jealous!! What should I do?

Dear "Confused,"

You really have to talk to him. In person not over the phone. You should really tell him exactly how you feel. Tell him why you broke up with him in the first place. As for the note of his that you read you should tell him that you read it. Even if you think he'll get upset. Honesty is really the best way to go in this situation. Also, since you were jealous about him having a girlfriend then you probably really do like him. Tell him that too. Tell him that you would like to have your friendship back with him and maybe even go back out with him again.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: ive been datin this older guy for 2 1/2 weeks....
wen we first started datin i was so excited..i really liked him!!!!!!
now i found a toatally different deppresed side of him....its startin to piss me of bc he trys and gets people to feel bad for him......
now evrytime we meet its always one of his friends on one of my friends is wit us..(i dont like to be alone wit him)its usually his friend brian who comes wit us
...ive known brian a lot longer than my bf and ive always had a crush on him....now spendin more time wit brian i like him a lot...and i just found out that he likes me...
but my boyfriend is odd, even if i cheated on him he'd neva break up wit me.....
i dont want to break up wit him bc he's so awsome and he's like my BROTHER (another reason i dont want to date him)...

how do i get him to dump me and stay friends...and dont tell me to tell him how i feel.....(it doesnt work!)pleeeeezzzzz help me!!!!!!!!

Dear "How do I break up with him?"

I think the best thing to do is for you to break up with him. You don't have to necessarily have to tell him how you feel but you could give him a general view. Either way it's gonna hurt him. You should definately tell him that you think of him as a brother. That would help him understand why you want to break up with him. You definately shouldn't try to make him break up with you.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: hey .. i shave my legs every morning and by noon they r all prickily LOL well do u guyz know ne thing i can do to keep them smoother for longer* thanx

Dear "keep legs smoother,"

You should use Nair. It really works. Instead of cutting the hair from the surface of your skin like shaving does it removes the root of the hair. So even if it does start growing it won't show because it hasn't reached the surface of your skin yet.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: okay heres my story! me n my friend went to the beach together n i took her there for her birthday! and we met this guy who we both thought was hott there..i talked to him first cause she was too scared! and he is realli intrested in me and i'm into him too! but i don't wanna hurt my friend! and i feel bad now cause i told her i would take her to the mall when me n him went but i didn't..we went last night but she doesn't know we went cause i know shes gonna get mad! i don't know what to do cause i realli like him! and i've had rough relationships in the past and he feels right for me! and i don't think talkin is gonna do much good with her feelings so instead of talkin to her what else can i do?! i feel kinda bad..but i realli truely like hiM! he's a sweetie!
ugh! help me please! i'll rate high!

Ps:she is just a friend..not a best friend

Dear "Friend and guy problem,"

Congratulations on finding a guy you're really into. About your friend...you're going to have to tell her sooner or later. I do think you should definately keep things going with this guy you met. To break it to her you should ask her if she still likes him. If she says no then tell her straight foward what's going on between the two of you. But you have to tell her even if she says yes. Remember the longer you hide this from her the more it's going to hurt her.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: okay... ther's this guy at school that i really like. he is cute and funny and smart and stuff. he is also a really good friend of mine though. i dont know if he likes me. (i am not like really hot or anything but i dont think he is shallow) last time i liked a guy i wrote him a poem on valentines day and got laughed at for monthes. p.s. i dont like him anymore. i really want this guy to ask me out... but how????? help me!!!!!!

Dear "How to tell him I like him,"

I really think you should try flirting with him. He most likely will flirt back And don't be scared to drop hints that you like him. Most of the time guys don't realize that you are hinting but if he does then he might ask you. You could also get a friend(anybody reall6y) to ask him who he likes or to specifically asks if he likes you. If he says yes but never asks you then you should ask him out yourself. I know alot of guys that find it attractive when a girl asks them out. You could ask him what he's doing next friday. I hope I somewhat helped.

Good Luck ")
**Latina Gurl**

Q: well i have these two friends. in fact they are my best friends. we are all bffs and so there is one girl named alissa and the other one is micheal. well alissa went out with micheal for a while and then they broke up. then alissa went out with micheals best guy friend, dan. then they broke up and like now alissas mom told her she couldnt have a bf. well now micheal is the only guy that alissas mom likes so she said that micheal was the only one alyssa can go out with. now i just know they are going to go out. i mean it is going to ruin everything because like i sorta like micheal but he only thinks i do as a friend...and i am not going to tell him that i do because i just cant and that wouldnt change anything beetween us or anything so yea. they havent gone out yet but like i kinda am getting the hint from both of them that they are so idk...someone plz help me. i dont want them to go out. i am second choice. i even know it! alissa told me that micheal said that and now im just so...not really jealous but jealous...if you know what i mean. any advice?

Dear "Jealousy has taken over,"

I'm sorry that all your best friends are going out with each other and you like micheal. I think you should let them know that you don't want them to go out. And you should tell Micheal that you like him. If they trully are your best friends then they will both understand how you feel. Even if telling Micheal doesn't change anything between you two at least he knows you have a reason for not wanting them to go out.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: ok.. Ive been going out with this guy for a while and i just talked to his best friend and told me hes been cheating on this other girl with me.. I have heard her name b4 from his brother and i asked his best friend if that was the name and he said yeah, i really dont wanna lose him, but the bad part about it is i lost my virginity to him and he said he lost it to me, well his best friend told me out of the blue that he wasnt a virgin.. I don't know what to do, i actually fell for him and i know he is going to give me an excuse or make up a lie when i go and try to break up with him !! I dont know what to do!!!I will rate 5's for the effort!!!

Dear Confused,

I'm sorry to hear that your boyfriend lied to you. I think the best thing for you to do is break up with your boyfriend. Even if he tries to make an excuse for what he did don't listen to him. There is no excuse for cheating on someon no matter what the circumstances are. On top of that he lied to you about being a virgin, and losing your virginity IS a big deal. To me it seems pretty obvious that he probably only went out with you to have sex with you.

Good Luck :)
**Latina Gurl**

Q: Hey im Nikki and i broke up with my b/f about 3 months ago (this was an 7 month relationship) And i love him more then anything, idk if he loves me at all and he asks if i would want to go back out with him and idk how he feels buthwe acts like a complete jerk to me and jokes around like he isnt joking but then he says he is and makes me cry (boo hoo) so whats your advice..?

Dear Nikki,
I'm sorry to hear that your ex-boyfriend that you love makes you cry. Although you love him you have to ask yourself... is he worth getting hurt over? If he jokes around and makes you cry, and he acts like a jerk then i would say no. Even though he asked you if you would go back out with him you should move on a find someone that makes you happy instead.
Good Luck :)
**LatinaGurl**