chinita_95's advice column

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Q: My boyfriend and i of one year all we do is fight and sometimes it's for no reason,i really love him but i don't think he wants to be with me anymore? well example this happened the other day well i wanted to go city today with a friend and i invited him along this was on Thursday,when i invited him he asked who's going i sai my friend and i and her friend she wants to meet for the first time he just came from America,then he goes oh what you're still going to without me aren't you i'm like why can't i go he goes because there's going yo be2 guys there that you don't even know and its her first time ever meeting them i said doesn't mean i'm going to talk to them he goes so you even say hi and i said well obivously i'm gonna say hi but doiesn't mean i'll start a conversation he goes okay what if they asked you how are you would you tel them i said yes then he goes there you that's a conversation.he told me it's not jealousy he's just scared anyways i didn't up going for him because i was scared if i was to loose him he couldnt come he has something on and i got upset cause i really wanted to see him then we just started arguing and all and we just argue for nothing he always tell me we shouldn't be together then he says i can't break up with you and he just says so much crap and honestly all i want is for us to stop arguing and fighting and suggestions?

Well talk to him. You tell him that your tired of fighting for stuff that makes no sense. Tell him all your feelings, don't be scared or feel bad by telling him the truth. Then of course let him tell you his side. If tells you again "that you guys should breakup" or "shouldn't be together". Then tell him if thats wat he really feels, or if thats what he wants. Cause of wat you said that you really love him, am thinking you don't want to let your relationship go down the drain. Both of you should make a list of the things you don't like, settle down and talk about it, and maybe change things. You don't know maybe things do change.

But if they dont then maybe all you can try to do is move on. Cause am slightly sure that you don't like to be arguin all the time. So just try.

Good Luck :)

Q: alright so im a guy and im 16. well my bestfriend and i have been tight since we were like 7, and its always been tough for him (and me) cos his sister is HOT. (she's 16 too, they're twins). and i mean ive always been attracted to her, but ive never made a move cuz shes like off limits ya know? anyway, i went over to his place the other day but he wasnt there and i kind of just ended up chilling with her. shes a really cool chick and since then weve hung out a few times but my buddy doesnt know about it... and i mean i think i really like her (i havent even put my hands on her yet) and i want to ask her out on a legit date but jesus, i do not want to deal with my friend. its pretty out of charachter for me to not fool around with a girl i like so i know that my friend is going to automatically assume that ive been on her if he hears that ive been hanging with her. so im really stuck now. any advice would be great, thanks.

Alright its very simple. All you have to do is ask the girl out, and when you two are really dating, you both go and tell your friend. Maybe he might feel weird that his best friend is going out with his sister. But if both are you "tight" like you say, then i would say he wouldn't have a problem.

If he does then talk with him and everything. Don't let your friend hold you back. Ask the girl out and give it a chance. Maybe your friend might like that your going out with his sister. You may never know.

Q: 18/F

I've liked this guy for almost 5 months, and have been waiting for something to happen. He really is one of the sweetest, nicest guys I've ever come to know. He's also a bit shy, and his last few girlfriends were quite aggressive, which I kind of am not Finally, after 5 months of me liking him and flirting he kissed me (just a couple of pecks on the lips). Apparently, he had been texting my sister for advice about me and has been telling her how much he likes me, and he likes how different I am. This was two and half weeks ago.

However, lately I feel like I'm back to square one. While he was away for the first week (he had a family reunion about an hour away) we would text and he would tell me missed me and stuff. But now that he is back, I still have not seen him, and I hardly get any calls. I understand that he is super busy with football (he has practice from 2-8) but I feel like every attempt I try to make with him gets shot down. I know for a fact that some of his friends go out after practice, too.

Some of my guy friends tell me I should give up, while my other guy friends tell me to keep trying. I don't know what I should do. I'm sick of being the person to make all the effort. I WOULD talk to him about this, but since we never actually have had a conversation about "us", I feel like I would come off as the crazy stalker girl.

Well talk to him..Call him or txt him and tell him if you guys can meet up somewhere. Not somewhere fancy. Like a park or maybe even ask him to take a walk with you. Make up something that you need someone to talk to too, and that he is the person you need at the moment. If he goes, you tell him, that you have had this gut in your stomach and cant handle it anymore. And from there you tell him everything. Don't feel that your going to be a crazy stalker girl. Just get himm by the hand and tell him what you feel. Thats all. And if it doesnt work then your just wasting your time. Maybe you can do better.

Q: I am having these feelings about abnging any guy. I want sex but I am waaayyy too young(13)

Look your in the stage of becoming a woman. Why do you want to have it already, when you have a whole lot of time, and can enjoy life. Wait till your with the guy you love and want to spend the rest of your life with, instead of with a dude you haven't even know for so long. My suggestion would be for you to wait.

Q: I'm 15, I'm a girl, I'm in love with a 28 year old man, he is in love with me, we have never done anything, not even kissed, but we go on dates and meet up about 3 or 4 times a week.

Is this wrong? And does he just want sex? Because that is what I'd normally think, but we've been dating a few months and he's never so much as suggested anything. And we were friends for ages before that too. I don't know what to do.

And I know I'm young, and people say I'm to young to be in love, but I've never felt like this before.

Well, what I think is that there is nothing bad to fall in love with somebody...Just that your 15 and he is 28. There's a 13 year old difference there. I would suggest that you move on, cause you don't know wat can happen, cause he is 28, a man, and maybe he knows a way with the ladies. Don't get me wrong..but just because you know someone doesnt mean you know them very well. I would suggest you to move on and go out with guys your Age.

Q: OK

So i am getting married in December and as you probably deduced from the title, I have a dilemma.

My Biological father has always been in my life from timt to time. I only saw him occasionally, (like every other weekend) but our relationship has always been a good one. He's never been my provider though...

My STEP DAD has been married to my mother for 16 years, pretty much my entire childhood, and he was the provider and took care of everything I ever needed...the catch? He and I have NEVER had a strong relationship, HOWEVER, he and my mom are divorced now, and since the divorce, he and I have formed somewhat a pretty good relationship, he is still in my life. And helps me when he can.

SO SEE MY PROBLEM? heres a few things I was thinking....let me know what you think.

option 1: They BOTH walk me down the aisle. (i dont really want to do this. It just doesnt appeal to me, but everyone suggests it.

option 2: My dad walks me half-way, step-dad meets in the middle, and walks me the rest of the way, and gives me away at the alter.

now I have thought of another idea, one I really LIKE but I want others opinion on. Its not exactly tradiotional and Im not sure if its ever been done...here it is:

My BEST FRIEND Corey has been with me through everything. What if HE walked me down the aisle, and my dads were both standing at the alter with my Groom, and then when Corey gets me to the alter, he would hand me over to my dads and they would give me away, and Corey would resume his post as the groomsmen. That way they could both give me away and there wouldnt be any drama or hurt feelings??

HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

all opnions and advice would be great. thanks in advance!

21/f

Well I would suggest you go with option 2. It's better to let both of them walk you down, because both of them have been in your life. Let your step-dad walk you down first and in the midddle your biological dad. I think that you would like it and also your two dads. Have a great wedding and enjoy it.

-chinita 95

Q: I have a huge problem. I know it might sound wierd but dont laugh! I want to date men, kiss men,have sex with men,mary a men and have children with a men but i would'nt mind have sex with a girl! Am i a lesbian or not? But i want to mary and have sex with a men but like if a girl came to me and ask me if i wanted to have sex with her i would'nt mind and i'd say yes! So plz help me and tell me if you considered me a lesbian.
thanks

I wouldn't consider you a lesbian. But my opinion would be that if you like men and women i would consider you a bisexual. Don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong about it...just experiment with both and see which one you prefer or like better.