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July 20, 2008Answers:
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JustJessOx
about
hey my name is Sarah and i love to give people advice! I love to play sports and take pictures.
Be who you are, not what your not.
& Please Don't be afraid to ask for advice.
advice
so me and one of my good friends have been talking for about and things are going great. he lives about 3 hours away from me is the only down side. he came down to see me friday and stayed the night and left saturday and everything was great. We stayed up all night talking, cuddling, and kissing. I loved it. When he left i asked if we were still "talking" and he said yeah. I asked him why later and he said he wants to wait until summer so he has time. My friends tell me that they think hes a player and i dont know why. Hes really nice to me and treats me good. Do I listen to them or just go with what i think?
i hate being far away from a guy because you never know. Maybe if you know some of his friends you can ask them some things. or if he has like myspace os facebook, a little spying never hurts.
haha
But what if she gets really mad? I mean like, she is IN LOVE with this guy, i dont want to break them up, you know? And like, should i tell her i feel unsafe around him? I feel a little afraid that when me and him are left alone he mite try something
well, i still think you should tell her.
to me it sounds like she is IN LOVE with
a complete jerk. just tell her how you
feel about him, and how he really acts.
i think its worth a try
just think if you were in her shoes
you would want someone to tell you
that this guy your in love with
is being all flirty flirty with a good friend.
14 female
Ok sorry its so long!
Ok so a long time ago (well like three months ago) and i really thought we were going to start dating. I thought this because we went to the beach and hung out like ALL day together! Him and one of my best friends were really good friends and she was like IN LOVE with his best friend. well like a month later, he asked her out!! i was soo mad. she said yes. after like a month of them dating she changed COMPLETELY!! our friend talked to her about and she apologized and then kept making the same mistakes over and over again. This guy tried to hug me and thought we were really good friends and i just gave him the evil eye and walk away each time. The more and more they got closer i knew he wasn't right for her. She is so annoying now! She always complains about her "problems" but when me and our friend want to talk to her she runs off with her boyfriend or her new best friend. Her boyfriend knows i REALLY hates him now. every time i see him and we make eye contact its like this intense stare down of pure hatred (both ways) our mutual friend told me he really likes ME and is just dating my friend to make me jealous!! this made me so mad, but i didnt want to tell my friend because i didnt want to hurt her feelings cause she really likes him. like a lot. and last Saturday, HE CHEATED ON HER!!! he kissed another girl!!! and then he was blaming her for not giving him any "action" and he was being completely immature about it. Well, she FORGAVE HIM!!! ugh this made me sooooo mad!! and now, i have to spend ALL day with him tomorrow!! its a long story why but im afraid im going to yell at him and make the wrong move!! My friend is still really into him but he isnt into her, at all. I heard him talk to his friend how he is still trying to get me to go out with him!! Now i feel really insecure about being around him. Im afraid of what he will try to do. What should i do? Should i talk to her about it? I really don't want to be around him all day but i have to!! SOMEONE HELP!!!
oh my.
well i really think you should tell your friend.
i mean, sure, she probably will get really mad.
or might not even believe you, but atleast you tried.
and this guy sounds like a complete ass.
get rid of him.
Hi my frend and me and always best frends when were together but i feel like she just calls or texts or comments my myspace when her other friend cant hang out.
i cant talk to her about it b/c she will get mad b/c thats how she is. and i dont want a fight. so i dont know rely what to do about it. and shes also rude sometimes and it hurts my feelings.
well if shes rude and hurts your feelings
she doesn't sound like much of a friend
age: 15
gender: i'm a girll (:
okay, so, this might be a pretty dumb question to ask to some people, but i have to ask. okay, so at my highschool, no guys seem to be attracted to me, as a bf. but, outside of school, it's the opposite, you know? i just wanted to know, have you gone through this, and if you did, how did you cope with it? i mean, i just feel like an ugly duckling when i'm at school :( it would be really helpful if you gave some tips or whatever, to get me through this crap. haha.
ok, well.
yeah i do feel like that sometimes
just be confident with who you are.
Ok so this isn't my problem, it's actually my best friend's. She confided all of this to me yesterday and was in need of some advice. I tried to help her out as best as I could, but I couldn't say too much because i've never really experienced anything like this. That's where you guys come in. So here is her dilemma: (I apologize, as per usual it's gonna be ridiculously long.)
Ok so my friend, Jane, has been having problems with her boyfriend Dave. She met him through work (which will later play into a large part of the problem) and at first she really liked him. But at the time she wasn't really looking for a relationship (she had previously been having issues with another guy who she worked with and hooked up with). But Dave started showing signs that he liked her and eventually asked her out on a date. The whole time he was a complete gentleman and even ended the night with a simple kiss on the cheek. They spent weeks just going on dates and talking and getting to know each other before they became official. At first she was smitten - they had so much in common and she got along so well with him, and that lasted for quite some time. However, it still was only the start of the relationship. As time went on, he ended up meeting most of her family and friends, and they all loved him. (And I as a friend agree - he's one of the greatest guys I've ever met and I couldn't have been more happy for her.) But now as the relationship starts to get on, the problems begin to arise:
- First off, they work together. And he's one of her supervisors. A.k.a. If some people they work with find out...big "UH-OH". They could both lose their jobs. [Which would be problematic for both, him being that it's his career, and her for the fact that it's an internship in connection with her school, and it's directly related to her major and what she wants to do in life.) But so far they've had no problems in keeping their relationship a secret. However, as of late she's starting to feel like she's missing out on something...which will tie in with the next issue...
- Friends. Dave dislikes many of the people that they work with. So that causes a problem for Jane on two levels: 1.) She can't go out with certain people from work whom she'd like to hang out with because if Dave wants to spend time with her as well, she can't bring him because they can't be seen together. and 2.) Even if they are people who she doesn't have to hide her relationship from, Dave doesn't like them. Now she could just simply divide her time up and hang out with them and then hang out with him another time, but again that goes into another issue...
- He wants to spend WAY too much time with her. He's crazy about her and loves her and they spend a lot of time together. But whenever she wants her distance and a night out with the girls, he gets upset and feels as if she doesn't want to be with him, which in turn makes her feel bad. And angry at him at the same time.
Now that you know all the little nuances, it's time for the MAJOR problem at hand (that ties them all in). There's an age difference between the two of them, she's 20 and he's 26. Now age really ain't nothin but a number, and it's not that big of a gap, but it is starting to come into play in this case. Since she's only 20, she wants to live her life and experience college and have fun. Him being 26 and pretty much settled in life, has different ideas about that. She has a very energetic and magnetic personality. She likes to command attention from everyone (but not in an obnoxious, annoying way) and she loves making new friends and having lots of different people around her. She usally makes many friends at work, but because of Dave she hasn't really been able to do that (because of the two situations mentioned above). So when she sees her friends and people from work hanging out outside of the job, she feels as if she's missing out. Also, she's going to be graduating early [in like, less than a year] so with that in mind, and with most of her friends being older and graduating this coming year, she wants to spend as much time with them as possible and have as many experiences as she can before college is over. However, she feels held back because of Dave and it's driving her crazy. That's coupled with the fact that he's really in love with her. To the point that he's stated that he wants to marry her and spend his life with her. Now that's the FARTHEST thing from her mind right now and she's definitely not ready to get married at any time soon, nor does she think about it. Also, as of now she lives in Rhode Island (that's where she goes to school and works) but her hometown is New York. So when she's done with school, she's definitley coming back to New York. He's been thinking of also coming to NY to pursue a teaching career. This bothers her because she doesn't know if he's doing that to just follow her or because he actually wants to teach there, and she doesn't want him making life decisions like that based on her alone. She's tried talking to him about some of these things, but he usually just gets very upset and doesn't really understand her reasoning. And she gets upset talking to him about it because she really cares about him, and she doesn't want to hurt him, but she feels like no matter what she says will.
About a little over a year ago she was dating this other guy, Julio, who became somewhat possessive and didn't really like her hanging out with her friends too often. So he broke up with her after 6 months because of it. She's been dating Dave now for 5 months and she's worried that it might have the same fate, being that it's nearing the same amount of time and such. But she really doesn't want it to end and cares about him deeply -- but everything he's been doing has been pushing her away. Also despite this she's been trying to make time to see her friends and hang out with them up in RI, but they keep bitching about her saying that she doesn't invest enough time in them and that she's "changed", then when she makes an effort they blow her off (which is an entirely different problem...but it doesn't help her situation.) Also because of this, she's been finding herself attracted to other guys, but not in a sexual way. For example, she's developed this sort of "crush" on Ted, one of her higher-ups at work. She knows nothing will come of it (her being in a relationship and him being married) and she doesn't think of him "like that" at all, but she's just attracted to his personality and the kind of person he is, and she just admires him. It's nothing that will damage her relationship, but she feels it has a lot to do with Dave and the way he's been acting. Plus Ted does this thing with all his co-workers where he'll invite them over to his house and make dinner for them and they'll have a nice fancy dinner with him and his wife (he's a chef). He invited Jane a while ago, and she was going to go, and even told Dave in advance, but the day before she was going Dave flipped out on her about it. She still went, but it really upset her. And lately every little argument sets her off and they end up screaming at each other. Another big part is that his last girlfriend was in a committed relationship with him, but then ended it abruptly as college ended to go back to her homestate, which left him pretty devastated. I thought this might have something to do with the way he's acting in this relationship.
This has been taking a toll on her emotionally and physically, and she just wants some peace.
Sooo after this long rambling entry, the question is: What should she say to Dave? How can she let him know how she feels without hurting him or upsetting him? She doesn't want to end the relationship (again, aside from the fights here and there he treats her like a princess and is one of the sweetest guys she's ever met or been with) because she cares about him deeply, but how does she let him know that and also at the same time tell him that she needs her time away from him and to live her life? What else can she do?
Any advice would be appreciated, I really just want to see my friend happy. It hurts me to see her upset and hurting like this :(.
Thanks so much =)
Okay first off, I think their age differnce is a huge factor in this problem. I know she cares alot about him but he seems VERY attached and controlling.
Obviously, she is way too young to be thinking about marriage - she hasn't even finished college yet! College is about having fun and making life long friends. She shouldn't be worrying about her boyfriend. If he truly loved her and cared about her he would let her have fun without making her feel guilty all the time.
Usually it's the other way around where the younger person gets attached more so than the older one. So knowing that she seems more mature than he is. Personally, I would want a guy who is more mature than me for my sake.
Okay, so one of my friends, lets call her Jamie, is always making fun of my dislexia (and for those of you who dont know, dislexia is a learning disability that, for me, pervents me from reading and writing well).
She always laughs at me when I miss spell a easy word, or cant read a easy word. I also studder when I talk, which she makes fun of.
When i try to defend myself and bring up the fact that im getting strate A's, she brings up the fact that i can only write at a 4th grade level and have to type everything because my handwriting is unreadable.
Anytime i tell her to stop, she tells me to relax and that its just a joke. What should i do?
13/f
ok so you called her your friend.
it sure doesn't seem like shes a good one.
get serious when you talk to her about it
and stay strong cuz if u don't then she will
keep making fun of you.
im a graduated seinor moving on to a college. i got a job, a good job paying 10 dallors an hour. im supose to start on wensday. now all i can think is im going to be working till 11 at night and starting classes at like 6 in the morning if not earlier, i have to go full time or i dont get any money to pay for it, then i have to go to work full time. i have really bad anxiety and stress problems and i do not want to take pills for it, my boy friend was always there to help me with it, which worked for a really long time, now i wont have any time for that or even to study... if i dont work i cant drive to the college. but i need school.. i dont know what to do or how im going to manage my time. i was always full time high school and college courses, but i cant study at work, i dotn want to fail college. i have to be able to transfer to a four year university. what do i do what should be my priorities? am i going to fall apart and lose everything? i just need soem adivce and help. thanks in advance
ok so thats a long day.
i know this sounds weird but
you should try caddying at a golfcourse
its like a couple hours a day.
and my bro does it and he comes home with like 200 bucks each day. its sweett
idk if thats gonna help i doubt it.
just thought id suggest it
i really want this pair of cleats, i think they're called ringor. alot of girls have them and they come in like different colors and stuff, i checked alot of sports stores around where i live and none of them have them, does anyone know where i can find them? thankss
ohhh try looking them up onlineee
they have to have somee
17/f. I recently met a few guys down where I work, they dont work there they just go there a lot. Anyways I have kinda been like "talking" to all 3 of them and hanging with them and going to their houses. It's nothing serious we just chill and stuff but I am kinda just a friendly person and I thought it was all in fun but now all 3 of them constantly call and text me and talk to me as if I were their girlfriend.
I totally didnt realize what I was doing I didnt mean to lead them on but I have never done more than hugging with any of them! Now one of them is like obsessed and the other too are always asking to hang out and stuff like that.
I don't really like any of them enough to date them, and I'm in way to deep to just say I'm not interested. I only see them on weekends because I live about an hour away from them all (they all live close to eachother but dont really know eachother much).
I was thinking of telling all 3 of them that I met a guy closer to me at my school that I am seeing, so they will kinda back off a bit. I have tried ways of saying I just wanna be friends but it seems like its already gone to far. Should I tell them that? What should I do?! THANKS!!
you have gone really deep!
welll that could work but if
theyy found out that you weren't
youd be in deep s***.
deeper than you are now
soo i would talk to all of them
that you dont feel comfortable with
them being like this, i mean if you tried
it before and they wont' listen or gt the hint.
well maybe they are just creepy haha.
just talk to them .
and dont be shy about it
ok so im pretty sure mii friend thinks i like her boyfriend but i really dont i just like to talk 2 him. i laugh alot when im with him and i think she thinks its flirting. (sorry if that confused you) lol. but i dont want to stop talking to him cuz he's really cool but i dont want to loose 1 of mii best friendz.
what should i do?
ok so first of all.
i would think you and your bestfriend have either known each other for a while, or you guys are really close. or maybe both.
but if you guys call each other bestfriends then bestfriends trust each other and don't take their bestfriends boyfriend. im sure he is a really cool guy but i wouldn't want to lose your bestfriend over a guy. and you don't have to stop talking to him just set your boundries. all three of you could hang together. it would be fun :)
im 13(girl)
I have friends && everything but sometimes I just like to be by myself. Like, Idn why though?! I like to be with my family more && whenever I do hang out with friends I don' enjoy it alott. Am i a freek??! I cant help it, and Ido enjoy some friends like a few, but not all. I feel so stupid!! I don't reall care that I am loner kinda, but I know ppl will think im a freek! help?!
xoxoxox
ok well
i guess your just an independent girl
and you should be happy you are.
having your family be the closest to you is awesome and don't care what other people think of you. if you hang with friends and they are boring maybe you need more exciting friends haha
get to know more people.
Well, I have somewhat of bad acne. It's really not that bad. And I don't really care that I have some, my problem is that it's really red. Is there anything I can do to make it less red?
Thanks in advance(:
umm if your picking at it alot
then i advizeee you stopppp
16/ f
i really really like my best guy friend and weve hooked up before, and he wants to again
and it seems like he likes me but i dont think he does but my question is how do i make him think of me as more than a hookup?
p.s. i already stoped hooking up with him a few months ago and i always say no now
definately talk to him!
and just be yourself
cuz if he doesn't like you
for who you are
then its not ment to be
my friends on myspace dont comment my photos unless i comment theres first, you know when they say pc4pc. and i just wonder what would get there attention to my photo and comment it without me commenting on there photo first. Bc i always comment back on people who comment my photo.
thanx
maybe you should just be more creative with your picture and if you do that and own that picture
im 100% sure that they will comment you first!
one of my good friends likes my boyfriend and its totally obvious sometimes and she does that for ALOT of other guys, so i dont want to let it get to me, but even with that i still do most of the time.
what do i do?
ok this happens alot.
i think you should confront her on it.
ask her if he likes him and just tell her that you won't get mad if she does. cuz i mean if you guys are good friends then she will tell you if she does, and you should understand.
plus if your boyfriend loves you,
then he shouldn't pay any attention
to her and focus on you.