Have you talked to your brother about this? Or your parents?

I feel like this whenever my sister comes and visits. Nothing bad, just love. But when she was going to college I found it helped some to write her letters (you may prefer emails) and send her care packages. Like a box with food or cookies in it, maybe bring the rest of the family in on this as postage can be pricey. Otherwise maybe use IM or a webcam to talk to him? Set a scheduled time and stick to it.

Hopefully that helps a bit. Otherwise there's not much you can do, they get really busy during college & sometimes you do feel a little bit left behind which is natural because you ARE left behind. But that doesn't change who they are and the fact that they love you dearly. You gotta hold to that.

Ah. I think I'm gonna go and pen a letter to my sister now.

Take care!
Jaelle

At our local hospital teens can get involved with the seniors, talking to them, playing games or listening to stories. Other teens do hair or makeup or paint nails. Some help with dishes. It depends - ask someone in the hospital what they need help with.

Sometimes hospitals need more money as opposed to more bodies. In that case, organizing a fundraiser might be more appropriate.

Good job, though, for trying to volunteer!

Take care & have fun!
Jaelle

60's sounds waay too hot for me so I vote "PAMPERING!!!"

On a side note you are so lucky to have a week off! I have some time coming up in September, can't wait until then!

-- Take care & have fun!
Jaelle

You ask her for a talk and say, "Mom, I just wanted to let you know I got my period. I didn't want to tell you because you put everything on Facebook and I don't want something so private to be made so public. I would really appreciate it if we can leave that info off the 'web."

And hopefully she does. If not, you've set a clear boundary which she's broken... and you have a bigger issue of why she doesn't think you're worthy of respect.

I recommend this website to you for any further body/period/sex questions (I found it's helped me tons!):

http://www.scarleteen.com/

Take care out there and good luck!
Jaelle

Not sure what's going on or how old you are so the answer is going to have to be generic. If the issues are fairly mild - disagreements, etc, mild fighting - then ask if it's okay to meet at a neutral location to talk about things. You may want a neutral person - think someone you trust who is not involved in the issues - to be present to help keep the peace. Sit down with Dad and talk about how things are going, how it makes you feel, and what can be done differently. It's important to use "I" statements and keep them short.

I.E. "When I am relaxing at home and there is a loud disturbance it sets me on edge and makes me angry and scared."

Is better than "When you yell at me I get angry."

If the issues are more serious then you need to ask for help & involve a professional. This may be a trusted person like a counselor or pastor, someone who can help you respectfully articulate how you feel.

Take care out there and good luck!
Jaelle

I haven't been in a natural disaster but I have experienced some trauma. The things you mention - constant worrying, focusing on what happened, etc - are signs of you trying to process what happened to you.

Because it's been two weeks and the dear hasn't abated, I think you should go see a doctor and get evaluated for having Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Either way you need to get this out of your system, otherwise it will continue to eat and eat at you.

http://www.aftertheinjury.org/learnTraumatic.html?gclid=CP61ofzL5KoCFcYUKgoddDgB9g has more info on this disorder. Depending on how you feel about this I understand if you feel shame about going to talk to someone. You're not crazy or mentally ill & I want you to remember that. You are a normal person who has experienced something horrible, and who is having trouble "getting over it". Some people have better resiliency skills and can just get over things but others (like me) need a bit of an extra hand in order to recover from what happened.

Please do yourself a favor and let yourself get some help.

I feel like this a lot sometimes - no matter how awesome you are, you always feel like it's not enough. So to help me combat it (because I am a creative type, and yes, this is a creative project) I went out and got myself a huge sheet of poster board.

On the top of it I wrote: THINGS THAT MAKE ME AWESOME.

Then I brainstormed what made me awesome, whether it was from working with adults with disabilities while earning a Bachelor of Arts with a Gender Studies minor to the fact that I know all the words to "Don't Stop Believing". You are awesome, just sometimes you need a reminder of it. And a visual poster is always a good reminder.

I also (because feedback is nice) made little business cards. On the card it says, "You are awesome because _______." Then I went to people I knew, and told them why I wanted them to write down something awesome about me. A few didn't want to write which was cool but I got some really nice comments about things I didn't know about. Or you could ask this question on Facebook. See what happens, what people say.

Holy low self-confidence!

I know how it feels. I really do. I grew up poor (like rural farm kid in the dust bowl poor), pimply (I have bad eczema), nearsighted, and grossly overweight. Like you, I was totally a bookworm and longing to be one of the in kids. I was the "Eloise Midgin" of my high school. So I'm not kidding when I say I know what it's like.

However:

There comes a point (and I'm only now learning this, so take heed and learn it at your age, before you get too messed up) where you have to decide:

1) Stop comparing yourself to other people. You are not other people. You are you and when you say "I want to be like them" then you are saying you don't want to be yourself. Stop living your life by other people's terms. You have to be comfortable with yourself. My dad used to tell me "You were born into this world by yourself, and you'll go out by yourself. So you better be comfortable with yourself, honey, because you've got a lot of important things to do."

2) Decide what is more important in your life. In high school, I would have sold my right arm (or my mother's - somebody's arm, at any rate) to be thin and pretty. But beauty fades. And it can be faked. Character does not fade, and can't be faked, and lasts forever. It's about high time people realize that.

If you have back issues requiring surgery, then that happens. There's nothing you can do to fix it, so would you rather be pretty or healthy?

As for things to do: you don't need rich parents to give you lessons. I was dirt poor and found PLENTY of fun things to do and excel at. I started a 4-H club for bakers, did astronomy, and learned how to draw nature by watching nature.

It's a huge fallacy in this world that you need money in order to be good at something. "Gatekeepers" would prefer you believe this theory, in order so that the club can be exclusive and only the "right" (popular?) people can be a part of society. I say, screw that. If you want to be good at something, then go out and do it, but don't believe the crap "society" spews out.

Trust me: without knowing any more details than what I've read here, I can tell you that you are 100% because you are YOU. An individual. Don't become one of the sheep!!!!

I'll get off my soapbox now.

Well, I have one "public" profile which is for family, prospective employers, and potential mother-in-laws. This one is minimal in info, I maybe post once a week, usually some inspirational-sounding quote. Very bland and professional.

My REAL profile is altogether different. I'm not telling you to lie, here, just do some creative information management.

After all, the fact that your Mom doesn't trust you should have no bearing on the fact that you don't trust your Mom, should it?

I mean, if you are having this much of an issue over a Facebook page, then you are at some point going to have to talk to Mom about why she doesn't trust you and what you can do to get her to encourage her trust.

Okay. Ask yourself this question:

Would I want my dad to treat my mom like this? Would I want my daughter or sister or friend to be treated like this?

The answer should be no. Here is how I see it:

Anybody who cheats on you doesn't love you. He just loves how easy it is to mess around with you.

I say, even without knowing you, that you are way too good a person to be treated like that. How do I know? because you're still concerned with hurting him even after he's hurt you. I say drop him like a hot potato.

Nothing is 100% and it's always a good idea to have backup, maybe you being on the pill? Anyway, just don't double-up on condoms, that NEVER works out well for anyone.

Take care out there!
Jaelle

You say your life line is thin and vague with a break in the middle. Life lines that are thin can indicate someone with a general low level of energy, doesn't get too worked up about things, maybe a depressive personality. You're basically just chill 100% of the time. Mine is really deep, which corresponds to how I live (drama queen! Everything in exclamation points!!).

Life lines that break can indicate a major change in health or lifestyle. They can also indicate illnesses or trauma, struggle, or losses. I have a star (lines intersecting in a star or X pattern) about three centimeters in. Stars indicate a traumatic event which did happen in my case. I also have tons of lines which cross horizontally over my life line, these indicate my tendency to stress out and worry about every little thing.

If your life line has a smaller line next to it (like right next, not starting from one of the other mounds) it indicates you will either have time with your soul mate or there is someone present in your life who is a guardian/caretaker for you.

Now the fate line is different from the life line in that it tells us how the outside world affects you. Think of the life-line as your "inside" you and the fate line is the "outside" you. The stronger and deeper the line, the more strongly fate controls your life. If the line has many breaks or changes of direction, it means that you are prone to many changes in your life from circumstances you can't control. Mine intersects with the life line, indicating a point in my lifetime where I will have to surrender to the wishes of other people. I also have a lot of horizontal lines crossing my fate line, indicating struggle.

Overall it sounds like you will have a successful fate, but may have trouble with illnesses or health issues.

You cry two different types of tears. One is the reflex tears like when you cut onions or manage to smack your hammer into your pinkie. The other is emotional tears, like how you cried at the end of Lord of the Rings when everyone has to break up. (Maybe that last part is just me.)

The tear duct nervous system is actually really intense, with nerves going right into the cerebrum where your sorrow and pain centers are. So when you're watching Titantic and Jack dies, you feel sad. That sadness is recognized in your cerebrum which tells your endocrine system (tears have hormones in them) to start making tears.

Interestingly enough the cerebrum also controls speech. So some scientists who have studied tears have theorized that when our early ancestors died, and were burned at pyres, the reflex tears (from the smoke) combined with the emotional sadness sort of trained ourselves to start crying when we feel emotionally overwhelmed.

This could also explain why many more woman cry when they're on their period and emotionally mood-swingy. At least, that's going to be my excuse from now on. "Evolution, honey."

Take care!
Jaelle

I may have misread this question. But according to this article


http://pregnancy.emedtv.com/preconception/can-you-get-pregnant-without-sex-p2.html


there is a very small chance it could happen. I still think it's a good idea to get tested, but like i said, it's probably the stress making your body think it's pregnant. Let me know how it goes and take care!

-- Jaelle

First thing: go get yourself tested for pregnancy and STDs because you had unprotected sex. Even if it was just for three seconds or oral or grinding each other there was opportunity for an STD to be passed on. Also, a guy does not have to come to get you pregnant. When a guy starts to get hard he emits a watery fluid called pre-ejaculate which does have semen in it. If that enters you yeah, you can get pregnant.

Second thing: you sound way stressed and that can also affect your period. During times of lots of stress mine can also up & disappear or be super heavy. One of the best ways to combat that is again, see your doctor to go on birth control & also to talk to you about how to combat stress. The sooner you learn proactive techniques to deal with stress the better because it really only gets worse.

Also, I'm going to refer you to a great sex-ed website called http://www.scarleteen.com/ I have found it way useful & totally informative.

Take care of yourself!!!!
Jaelle

Avoid walking or jogging at night (safety reasons). Why not combine walking with a friend from class and make it a study/discuss session? 30 minutes of walking/talking is enough to help with exercise AS WELL AS debating topics in class.

Okay, just off the top of my head:

"Candyland" was a sort of broad theme, so I've narrowed it down to a silver/blue theme as well - kind of an adult-style Candy/Wonderland theme. (Think of a cross between Candyland, Lady Gaga, and Christmas. If that makes any sense.)

Invites - could be in the shape of bonbons, or better yet go and get some of those cheap flat lollipops. Print your invite out on circles of card stock and stick to the wrapper.

Centerpieces - gather some fake flowers and put candy in the center. Or attach (via hot glue gun) candy to a couple of tree sticks to make candy trees. You can spraypaint the tree sticks with silver and glitterly blue for extra punch.

Flower arrangements - go with those wee bunchy type flowers. In this color theme, blue and white. Or you could go with flower bunches in cups.

Table runner - Mirror tiles or a long mirror down the middle. Float candles in glass holders to give a sparkly effect. Or go with a peppermint theme- white and red placemats.

A couple of ideas, hope that helps - I'm not much of a decorator.

Take care (and enjoy your party!)
Jaelle

Okay, no offense, but when I think vampire a tutu does not come to mind... the black dress with the corset should work, but vampire = undead. So I would go with a sort of ragged edge/tattered look. Think trashy rocker and you're likely to be on track.

Hell yes be worried! Even if the guy doesn't finish he can leak a sort of pre-cum fluid which is also full of sperm. You need to wear a condom! You need to wear a condom even if you are on the pill because a) the pill is not 100% failproof and b) the pill don't protect against STDS!

You need to bring this to an adult. You could be pregnant or have an std or both.

If you are not smart enough to check that a guy is wearing a condom then you are not old enough to be having sex.

Personally.... I think "no guns" is better. If you don't want to go that route then a strict "no guns pointed at people" rule is in order, although good luck enforcing it.

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