okay, right now i'm going thru finance problems and i am tierd of being broke and my mother is rallying on me to give her some money for the holiday (she wants to throw a party) so i need money like yesterday. i ran into an oldd high school friend at my part time job he is very interested in me. he has three cars, two jobs and makes a lot of money. he gave me an ultimatum of being with him and all my finance problems will go away plus an apartment and a car but the problem is i'm not attracted to him so I told him no but now i'm thinking about it because it would mean the world to me if i could get my mother some money for her to do what she has to do for the holiday. so what do you think should i go with this chance or just let it pass me by?
Financial issues make people do crazy things. Happens to me all the time. I hate being broke as well, but look at it this way. If you had money, and he gave you the same ultimatum, you wouldn't go through with it, right? This guy basically says, "I'll pay you to f!@# me", and if anything, you should be insulted that he even made that offer. You're not a hooker. He shouldn't be offering to buy you (even though I will admit, that offer is pretty incredible lol). Don't devalue yourself for money. You'll just end up hating yourself, and breaking someone's heart, because you're only in it for the money. It's not fair to either of you.
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I met this guy at my friend’s party. He was his ex boyfriend but also best friend. Me and him started talking a lot on the phone after we meet, we text everyday for 2 months straight and call each other every night. I think I like him I don’t know. At the beginning he told me he also liked me, but then I told him some stuff about my ex and he told me I GUESS THIS IS GOODBYE and since then we haven’t been the same. We still text everyday but it’s not a lot anymore, and we haven’t talk on the phone for more than 2 weeks. But I think it was because my best friend (also his ex girlfriend) started to talk to him again; they know everything about each other because they been friends for almost 6 years! She told me that he wanted something with her and she just wanted to play with him.I don’t know what to do anymore I cant tell him what my friend is going to do. And they are going to see each other this week. I want him to like me but I also cant date him because of my bestfriend. Everything is very complicated. Please help me.
I’m a 15 year old girl.
RELAX! Without knowing what you told him about your ex, I can't really tell you why things changed between you two. As for your best friend, don't you think it's a little rude that she would mess with him at all...even if she is just toying with him, especially, since she knows how you feel about him? That doesn't sound like much of a friend to me. Is that the kind of person you want to associate with? Don't get me wrong...I'm not judging your friend. I can't because I don't know her, and I don't know the whole story here. I just had to ask, because if it were my friend (which has happened to me A LOT!), I'd feel a bit betrayed. I would confront her about that. I'm not saying "go start a fight" or anything, but if it's bothering you, and if she really is your friend, then you should be able to tell her that.
As for the guy, you may have somehow offended him with the info about your ex, but if he's still talking to you, there's still hope. I can't count how many times my boyfriend told me "goodbye" or "don't ever talk to me again" before we started dating. Keep the lines of communication open. It may be awkward now, but that fades with time. Talk to him. Ask him if there is anything that you said/did wrong. Explain to him that you feel like you two are getting more and more distant. Ask him again how he feels about you. But, guard your heart. You may find out that things have changed and he isn't interested anymore. If that's the case then, obviously, that's gonna hurt quite a bit. If you brace yourself for bad news, it won't hurt nearly as much, and you can get over it easier.
You are so young. There will be plenty of other guys, crossing paths with you. Don't get all wrapped up in this one guy (unless you two do start dating). If it turns sour, then don't let it phase you. It's his loss, and you will someday meet one who is perfect for you.
I really hope that helps! Good luck!
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i had this friend ever since freshman year. let's call her A. anyway. A and I are seniors but over the summer and this year our friendship has been fading into almost nothing. It was uncomfortable for me to be around her for some reason. She wanted me to go to Emporia with her so we could be roomates but i didn't really want to roomate with her. i told A I got into Emporia, but she hadn't heard anything from them yet (this is a good college for education, something we both wanted to do) and her reaction was exactly like this "WHAT! UGH!! WTF. i applied way before you did." I thought she'd be happy for me but I guess not. So recently I found out A had been talking to one of our mutual friends, emily, about me. She had told emily how i had gotten into Emporia before I did and how I had gotten into all these colleges and that I was indecisive about where I wanted to go and it made her mad about how indecisive i was. I had asked the Emily what she said and she confirmed that she talked about my indecisiveness about college, but then I came to find out A had told another Emily in our class the same thing. So that was at least two people she was complaining to me about. I'm a little offended that she talked about me behind my back. what should i do about A?
Honestly, I think that you know the answer to your question. You need to talk to her. There is obviously a lot more going on than she's letting on, and if you two were really as close as you say you were than she should be able to talk to you about this.
You two are about to go to college, and it sounds to me as though "A" is being extremely childish. Gossip, talking behind your back...she should have been passed all that in junior high.
You aren't excused either. If you knew that something was going on, you should have gone straight to the source. Relying on hearsay is dangerous. You know how in elementary, we'd all sit in a circle, and someone would whisper something to one person. Then it was everybody's job to pass it on, and 9 times out of 10, the end result was totally screwed? Gossip circles work the exact same way.
She could be acting this way for many reasons. She may feel the relationship going to two different directions and that could make her upset. She could be jealous that you got your answer before she did. Maybe she's upset that she doesn't have as many options as you do. Whatever the case, both of you need to cut out the middle people, and handle this like women.
The conversation will probably be unpleasant, but if you two are REALLY friends...then you can work through it. It's totally understandable that you wouldn't wanna room with her. Part of the college experience is breaking away, and meeting new people. It's a door to all sorts of new and exciting experiences (that sounded really really cliche lol...sorry about that, but it's true). Just because you aren't rooming together, doesn't mean you can't still be friends.
Bottom line...you two need to talk. You need to establish where you are in your friendship, and where your friendship is going. And as painful as it sounds...VERY few high school friendships last forever. I'm not saying yours won't, but it is a possibility that maybe you two are heading in opposite directions.
Whatever the case, I hope you two work things out.
Best of luck!
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im 21 and me and my fiance have been trying to have a baby, im really good with children, have experience, just having some problems, i have a thyroid problem, taking medicine for that, is there any other ways, i never get my period, maybe like every 6 months i get it,it breaks me to see alot of my family having babies,we have been trying but just not working,please any ideas will help me
There are many many reasons that you may be having trouble getting pregnant, and not all of the are your fault.
Reasons for infertility in a man could be any of the following:
1. Abnormal sperm production
2. Problem delivering the sperm properly
3.Overall health (obesity, alcohol, drug usage, and even tobacco can make it difficult to conceive)
4. Overexposure to pesticides, chemicals, or heat (saunas, hot tubs)
5. Damage caused by cancer or its treatments
6. Age (men over the age of forty have a harder time conceiving)
The female could also be the problem for the following reasons:
1. Blocked or damaged fallopian tube
2. Endometriosis (when the cell from the lining in the uterus, grow on the outside for some reason
3. Ovulation disorders (the eggs are not being released properly
4. Elevated prolactin (prolactin is the hormone that produces breast milk. Too much can make it harder to get pregnant)
5. Polycystic ovary syndrome (your body produces too much of the hormone androgen
6. Early Menopause
7. Benign tumors in the wall of the uterus
8. Bands of scar tissue that bind organs after pelvic infection, appendicitis, or abdominal or pelvic surgery
9. Some meds can cause infertility
10. Thyroid problems
11. Cancer and treatments for it
That's a lot of scary things considered, but if you're having problems getting pregnant, then you have to consider every possibility...even the bad ones.
I highly recommend going to see a Dr. and letting them run the proper tests. It could be nothing at all. Sometimes it just takes a while. Besides as long as you're enjoying the process, it can't be all bad ;)
Best of luck!!
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My boyfriend got in a wreck a week or so ago. We used to see each other every weekend and every Friday. We were never apart. It was great. But now we barely see each other outside of school and I'm just not feeling our relationship anymore. This distance is terrible. I barely have the money and gas to go to his house and he has no car. We always said that the distance would never effect our relationship. I'm the first girl he ever felt strong feelings for and I never stop thinking about him, but not seeing him a lot makes me lonely and depressed. I try to hang out with friends and keep busy but I can't. How do I make these feelings go away? I could never ever break his heart.
Ok, first of all, I have to ask...was it him that you were into, or just the idea of being in a relationship? It sounds to me like you just miss hanging out with "a" guy...not necessarily "your" guy.
I could be wrong, but if it were my man, I'd find ways to get gas money. The longest I've been away from mine while we were together was 4 days. I'm sure it's probably been longer for you, but my point is that as agonizing as it was...my feelings for him never lessened. They got stronger. Do you at least talk to him everyday? It may not be what you want, but it's something that you can keep a link to him with. If you are really starting to lose interest, then it may be time to move on.
It's never easy to hurt someone, but the longer you wait, the more it will hurt. Of course, this is just my opinion. Yet, I assume that if you're on here, it's because that's what you're looking for (not necessarily mine, but someone's).
Best of luck!
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24/f, my boyfriend is 23/m.
Please don't think I'm ungrateful, it's just that I'm... not used to being treated well, or being appreciated.
I've been in two abusive relationships, one right after the other. My last ex liked to buy me things out of the blue, but somehow always held it against me (e.g. "I got you [blank] and you didn't [blank]! How could you be so ungrateful?"). The guy before him never gave me anything without getting or wanting something in return.
My current boyfriend is beyond wonderful. He somehow treats me like a princess and an equal; we don't play mind games with one another, and I really trust him, which is surprising, given my history. He loves to get me little things to make me smile. For instance, he picked up on me feeling kinda down one day, so he showed up after work with a stuffed animal, saying he thought I could use a fuzzy pick-me-up. I know, "why the heck would anyone complain about that?" But that's part of my confusion...
I feel so... strange about taking presents from him. He talks about all these things he wants to give me, and it's sweet, but it's not practical.
It also frustrates me a little, because while he's living with his parents, working part time, and able to spend his money however he likes, I'm living on my own; I have a cat to take care of, I'm working full time, have medical problems, and can barely pay my own bills. There's so much I want to do for him; so much I want to give him, but I can't. He understands perfectly, so far, but I guess I'm a little afraid he'll start holding it against me, or something.
I haven't mentioned any of this to him yet... I'm not really sure if I should, or how to do so.
What should I do about this? Should I even do/say anything? Or is it time for me to shut up and enjoy a healthy, happy relationship? Is this part of a healthy relationship? After my ridiculous past and boyfriends from hell, I'm not sure I know anymore.
Help a girl out? :)
Baby girl, I have been on both ends of the spectrum here. I've been with guys who have showered me with gifts, and most of which weren't even boyfriends at the time, and I've also been with guys who didn't give me squat unless it was a special occasion, or they thought it would make me happy because I'd been bitchy for a while. From what it sounds like, you've got a good man, and all he wants to do is make you feel as special as you make him feel for giving him an opportunity to be with you.
For girls like us, that's a concept insanely hard to grasp. We get so caught up in the idea of feeling like we have to repay him that we almost forget to show them that we appreciate them.
Your man has a job, and lives with his parents, which means he can do anything he wants with his cash, but he makes a constant effort to spend it on you. That has to count for something. Not only that, but it has to show you that you mean something to him. Since he's not really getting anything in return than you know that he's doing it out of the goodness of his heart...not because he expects anything in return.
The reason that you feel weird is because you have never been with anyone who has ever placed any value in you...therefore...you've placed no value in yourself. That makes it extremely hard to accept his gifts. The first thing you need to realize is that you deserved to be treated like the princess you are (and you are a princess). He understands that you can't always return the favor, and he's reasonable enough to know that you would if you could.
Girls like this (myself included) get to a point where they don't feel like they deserve to be treated as such. That gets dangerous because if you find yourself with someone who doesn't appreciate you the way you should be, you stick with it because you either don't feel like you deserve better, or you feel as though you can't get better, so you stick it out just for the sake of being with someone.
Once you realize that this man obviously cares a great deal for you, and once you realize that you deserve to be treated just as special as he is treating you, accepting his kindness will get easier and easier.
As for your financial situation, if he's as sentimental as you make him out to be, you can always make something for him. Just make sure its personal and from the heart. I've done everything from poems, to mix cd's of songs that remind me of him/us, to actual recording (I don't know if you sing or play anything...that's just one of my ways to make it personal). You don't have to spend a lot of money, and it is way more intimate than anything you could possibly buy from a store. Judging by the person you've made him out to be, it doesn't matter what you give him. He'll love it because it came from you.
So remember,
1. He only does it because you mean so much to him
2. He's reasonable. He knows you can't match his gifts, and he's ok with that.
3. When you can't buy it, make it. Cook a special dinner! They say the best way to a man's heart is through is stomach lol!
4. Screw your old boyfriends! They missed out!
You'll be fine. It's a rough transition, and painstakingly difficult to do, but you'll get there. You and your relationship will be all the better for it!
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So theres this guy at school thats now my boyfriend but before we were dating he kept saying " oh i dont wanna gf till i get my licence " blah blah blah but no we are dating. Did i or our friends presure him into this? Plz helpp
There's a million angles to come from with this answer. First things first, just how pushy were you and your friends with this guy? Sometimes this can be a deterrent. You'll have your guy wondering why everyone is trying to get him with you. What wrong with you and why hasn't anyone else gone for you? When you get pushy with a guy, it raises questions. But seeing as how he did end up getting with you, maybe it's not you who has the problem. It could be him. Low self-esteem is a tricky thing. It doesn't matter if you're an AV club nerd, or the star quarterback, everyone deals with it...a lot of us deal quietly. He could be so excited that someone...heck...anyone is interested in him. He may have jumped at the opportunity. Either way, these are not good foundations for a relationship at all. I'm not saying that you need to break up with him. Speaking from experience, I often feel like I pressured my man to get with me. But in the end, I couldn't be happier. I love him, and I know loves me as well. But that story doesn't happen for everyone. What you need to do is talk to him, and ask him one of the most difficult and frightening questions you could possibly ask anyone in a relationship..."Are you happy?", and "Do you feel like maybe we rushed into this too soon?". I'm not going to lie and tell you that the conversation is gonna be all candy and rainbows, but it is necessary. Even if it turns ugly. Why is that bad thing? Because that leaves a HUGE possibility of cheating. If he does feel pressured, then it's because he either lost a bet, or he is genuinely concerned about hurting your feelings (I pray that if that's the case then the latter is true). And if he's even slightly concerned about your feelings then there's the possibility of him screwing around behind your back. I am not saying, by any means, that he would do that because I don't know him. I say it because the two worst possible things to happen to any relationship, is to walk in on them in a compromising position, or hear it from someone else. If you hear it from someone else, it will obliterate any trust that someone would have for their partner. And that hurts a lot worse than just making a clean break. On the other hand, you may find out that he didn't feel pressured at all, but that he was just waiting for a cue from someone that you were interested. But, you may find out that he does feel like he rushed into something he wasn't ready for. Either way, in the end you will know the truth. You never wanna stay with someone just for the heck of it...whether it be status, self confidence, or just the fact that mommy and daddy didn't hug you enough. There is someone out there waiting for a girl just like you. Being patient SUCKS! But in the end it's worth it. I promise.
So remember,
1. Talk to him. That's most important! And talk to him alone!
2. Focus on you and the person you wanna be so that you can find your match
3. Be prepared for bad news, but don't let it break you. Your love is worth the wait, and he will be glad he waited for someone like you!
Best of luck!
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