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Welcome to my advice column. My name is Dawn. First, I assure you I am not like other young people at all. There is nothing about me that is overly special. I have an extreme fear of going back in time, getting stuck there then contracting a disease that's curable now but not curable then, and of being drowned by peacocks. o.0 I have little respect for what hasn't earned it, most of the world is little more than my plaything or a joke to me but what makes it inside my walls is there forever. I was probably tampered with as a child by aliens. Godspeed.


This is an advice column. I have little patients for idiots...


Q: Can I ask you a question?


A: You just did, now I'm all out of answers for today, try again never.


Q: What's the song that goes like this ... ?


A: How is this asking for advice?


Q: I had unprotected sex 23,086,165 times, am I pregnant?


A: Take a damn test and stop being such a whore.


Q: Does he like me?


A: If you have to ask stupid questions like this, to complete strangers who know neither of you, then I highly doubt it. And if he does, then he's an idiot.


Q: Ok, I have to write this essay on (fill in the blank), what should I write?


A: Try growing a brain to think for yourself. You'll never amount to anything if you try to get others to do your homework for you.


Q: Rate this picture, am I ugly?


A: Once again, how is this asking for advice. Stop trying to get self-confirmation through strangers online. You have real self-issues and should probably see a therapist.


Q: Lyk how do u no if u r a lez?


A: You should really learn proper spelling and grammar. It's beyond me how anyone can understand a thing you said.


If you have a serious question, I can be one of the most helpful people you know. I may be only 22, but I have experienced a lot in my life. If I don't know the answer to your delema, I wont pretend to know it and give some random answer that sounded good at the time, I will simply let you know that I don't have the answer, and reffer you to some place that you can find the answer.


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