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Hey, I'm 16 and cute and give excellent advice. I rate pretty high and Have been through almost anything you can throw my way. Just ask it and I'll answer the best way I can and I will always tell you straight up how it is. If you don't believe then just ask.

P.S. It doesn't hurt to have me as your favorite columnist- that way I can share my wisdom with you when you ask me directly instead of chancing that I'll come across it. :-)

advice

so i have a low confindence level.its like am afraid of popular kids in my school and i kind of want to be one .but i dont think i belong with tem .i like to watch them and know wats going on in their lives.what is wrong here.

There's nothing wrong, except that you are wanting to be someone your not. I know that the popular kids seem like they are really living the good life and that they are well-known so they must be lucky and such but it's not always true. I have been there and actually still am there. I hang out with a lot of the "important people" and once they get home they are normal kids just like the rest of us. Sure some my have more money than most and be able to spend it but they all have the same feelings that the rest of the world has just they cover all that up when they get to school. Next time you go to school and see the popular kids think about how happy they look and important they look and then think about how they could be having trouble at home or even if they aren't they could just be lonely or tired of everyone knowing their business. I know that I HATE going to school and having people I don't know ask me about old news and how I feel about the new stuff going on in my life. Even when they aren't being asked about their life they know that there are people wanting to know about it. So seriously don't be envious of others because they aren't always what they appear to be and you may have it better when it comes down to privacy and feelings.

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okay well whoever tells me an advice to this, thank you very much!!!!!

Okay, if your afraid of messing up your friendship then you should decide which is more important to you. Would you like to be more then friends with him and take the chance that you'll work out and even if you don't that you'll go back to being good friends or do you wanna make certain that you don't screw things up and remain friends. I think, just my POV, that you should give it time and see if you still have these feelings about him a few weeks from now and maybe then if you don't still feel this way then you won't have to decide. OR maybe the feelings you are having is a love for him as a best friend, kinda like you would love your brother. And perhaps it's just your friendship growing closer. Just give it time, that's the best thing I think she should do right now.

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i am starting to like this guy but no one knows. he sits next to me in one of my classes, and yea we flirt =] but one of my good friends has started coming over to my seat lately before class and really flirting with him and he flirts with her.. and the last couple days its been really bothering me b/c she never came to talk to me (but really she just talks to him) until him. should i say anything..? what else should i do?

You could ask her staight up if he she likes him and then if she says why, you could tell her the truth (that you like him) or you could just say you were wondering. But she can't know you like him unless you let her know or drop hints, otherwise she isn't doing anything wrong.

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I have this friend and lately her parents divorced. At first she wouldn't tell me but then she did and she started crying. I feel really bad for her, how can i make her feel better? She keeps on saying that people will think that she is a divorced child.. But she really isn't. Shes so nice.

Let her know that many people have divorced parents and they aren't spoiled or divorced children. It just means that her parents are doing what will make them happy and people wouldn't really be able to tell by looking at her. It will be okay, people get divorced all the time and she won't be made to feel any less loved. Hope it helps!

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I have this friend that died and I thought it was partly my fault and then her mom came to my house and told me that it was her other friend's fault. Lets just call her Mary Jane. Now Kylie(Dead Friend) had been hanging around with Mary Jane a lot and nobody knew about it. I used to feel sorry for Kylie and her family, and sometimes myself. But now I'm mad at her. It's starting to scare me bercause, how can I be SO angry and a 13 year old girl who died in a car crash?


**(((Mandy)))**

It's okay to be angry, but I think you are talking her smoking a lot. If that's the case then be angry, your friend was young and didn't need to be smokin or doing anything wrong. But you couldn't have known. It's better to be angry then to feel nothing. Your young and you'll learn to come to terms with how she died and who's at fault. Until then keep feelings things, b/c it's better to feel something bad and angry then to feel nothing at all.

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My friend Alexa and I wer'e haveing a fight over two Actors on TV and we shared our opinions. but Alexa took mine too seriously and now she won't talk to me. So i said our friendship's over, and she won't WONT reply to me!!!!!!!!!!!! What should I do?

This just means you need to be the bigger person and call her. You tell her that it was just your opinion and then it should all be ookay, but if not then you two don't need to be friends, because well friends should not stop talking because of an opion of an actor. Good Luck!

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I'm 14f and in eighth grade, and my i know this girl who is bagging. ((for all of yall who dont know bagging is a type of inhalance)) FWI she is NOT my friend. I've heard her saying things and mumbling to herself about things like "I'd burn this place up if they'd let me." and "Car Pe Duim." Now I know that's latin for seize the day and I'm really not sure that I want to to be the one to seize it. I htink it might be the fumes from the spray paint she's been huffing that are making her think this way. I'm worried about her and her parents, because there was this fourteen year old kid at my school who was bagging and he got himself killed. I'm not saying I like the girl or anything, but I don't think our little town or anybody else can handle another bagger death. We have had people come to school and talk to us about sex and drugs and this girl does it all. I need to talk to her or her parents somehow, but I'm afraid to go near her. If I don't do something she get her, and the entire town killed with her. HELP!! ((sorry if this was so long))

I think you need to talk to her parents or someone in the school (guidance counselor) because you're right she could get killed. It may be better to talk to the counselor if you don't wanna go near her. adn don't worry about getting her in trouble, it's better then letting her slowly kill herself. I think even if you don't like this girl it shows your human and care about people enough to get them help, Hopefully this girl realizes one day that you may save her life. Good Luck!

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To tell the honest truth, I dont have a lot of friends & most of them when i call them (like tonight) make up an excuse not to go out with me. *yeah, i know, mean but please dont pity me* So, anyways i have nothing to do! Im not going to just sit around - but im not going out alone! wtf can/should i do? =/ Signed, Oh so lonely

Here's how I see it. Your friends are thinking of excuses because they are either hanging out with someone who doesn't like you or they aren't in the mood to be around you. If you don't wanna be in the house just sitting around then you could do something fun in the house (shopping online, chat rooms, be on the phone with someone who isn't busy) and when you get bakc to school you need to expand your friends to people who have time for you. Don't drop your friends now but just add some of those enemies or don't know yous's into the friend category. It never hurts to have more friends unless you have too many as is. Good Luck!

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Ok im sorry if it long but I just dont know what to do.
I met this girl (Sarah) she waas new in the beggning of the year. We turned out to be best friends. We did everytihng sleepovers, movies mall everything. All along there was this girl(Julie) who for some reason really badly wanted me to just leave so she could move in and take my spot as bff with Sarah. Ok so i ahd to miss school for 6 days right b4 april vacation. When i came back i saw SArah i nthe hall and expected a OMG YOUR BACK and stuff but she ignored me wehn i ran up to her to say hello. I was shocked!The hole week Sarah woyld leave Julies side. SArah would talk about hoe she hated the wa JUlies makep was and know she wearing it the same way. THat left me with no one, i eventually started to hang out with other people but still miss SArah as a friend ot talk to and hang around with. She not the same. I dont no what happend during those 6 days. Now about 2 or 3 months later whe ni tohught evrything would pass it didnt. I know it been a long time but i dont know.

Sorry its soo long
please any advice would be helpful!

I think what turned out happening was that this Julie girl started talking to Sarah about you. Not to jump to conclusions but that's the most likely thing that happened unless Sarah was holding some bad feelings toward you on a little situation and Julie just added to it. I think you should try and talk to Sarah and ask her what happened, maybe call her or talk to her when she's not arund Julie. I can't promise that the feelings of wanting your bestfriend back will go away because mine haven't yet (same situation except they were both my best friends and then one got mad at me and turned the other against me too). But from experience all I can promise is that it will get easier and maybe you will realize that Sarah may not have been such a good friend if she turned away from you so easily

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My best friend(we'll say lucy) is going to prom with this kid(we'll say nick). Well recently they got into a fight because nick went out and picked up our other friend and brought her out to lucy's house after we had asked him to. Well we promised that we would give him ten dollars gas money, since he was low, if he did this for us. Well lucy has been practically obsessed with nick for the passed two years but he won't give her the time of day. Before lucy and i started talking i had dated nick and it was actually through him that lucy and i became aquainted. Lucy and nick are both seniors and lucy's dream was to go to her senior prom with him. Luckily thanks to the help of her friends, nick agreed to go with her. Well when lucy worked her ways nd talked nick into leaving without that gas money, he got really mad. (because he was on E when he got home) And the reason she didn't give it to him was because she didn't have change for a twenty. When nick got home he txt messaged me to tell me that he wasn't going to prom with lucy and this really upset her. Then another fight broke out because I have been talking to him AS FRIENDS and some of lucy's other friends don't see this appropriate. But when i don't talk to him, everyone gets mad at me and yells because they say there is no reason to hate him just because he broke my heart. So me, trying to be the peace maker, started talking to him civilized once again and now we're friends. (NOTHING MORE)Well he called me today and we got to talking. I begged him to reconsider taking lucy to prom because i know how much this means to her, nd he said: "Hmmm, i have an idea". Well this idea isn't any good :( AT ALL-- He agreed to go with lucy again to prom on one condition; if i sleep with him. He has been bugging me to sleep with him for the passed 7months because i turned him down the two times we were together. I know I can't do that to her even though it would get her to prom. And i don't know how to tell her because it would devastate her. But what if i tell him no and he wont go to prom with her? Then i will feel like this is all my fault because i didn't betray my friends trust.. I'm so hurt and confused-- please and thank you for listening to me babble!!

I think you should tell her the conditions and explain that if she really waas your friend she'd believe you and not make you do it. And if she doesn't accept you not wanting to sleep with him or doesn't believe you then she isn't a true friend. Just do what you think is best in your heart adn don't let "Lucy" or "Nick" talk you into it.

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ok there is my two best friends we'll call them A and B! ok i have been best friends with A for a loooooong time and with B since 5th grade. ok my friends A and B have been hanging out a lot and im getting REALLY jelous b/c they dont really include me in a lot of things now. so my questions are... (i rate high)
1)Is this wrong for being jelous?...(and)
2)How can i tell them without them getting mad?

Thanks a bunch!

-*Marissa*-

I went through the same thing and my advice is to let them know how you feel. Don't go get mean and offended if you don't like their reasoning but you do need to let them know how you feel. If you think making the friendship better isn't going to work by talking to them then you are setting yourself up for exactly what happened to me. They will start to think that you aren't interested in hanging out or they will just assume you are busy. Before you know it they will be hanging out with out you and you'll feel left out and things won't get better. Talk to them and you'll be hanging out with them before you know it.

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