Hi!!I am Emily and i decided to give advice because i like helping people and see them happy...Others tell me that i am understanding and sociable. The only thing i know for sure is that i am possitive thinking! I have one sister and i am a very good friend with her. My best friends are Ann and Geogre. I share with them almost everything. I have a lot of friends and we go out together all the time. My hobby is acting and that's why i want to become an actress or an advisor.Of course i like giving advice. The last one is the best!!!
I like Justin Timberlake and Nick Carter very much because apart from their talent they are very hondsome too. I also like Britney and Alyssa Milano. I watch Charmed and Smalville but i like California teens very much too.
I think that we should smile more often and that's why this is my nickname!I also believe that everyone should be more spontaneous. Everyone should be a little bit more his/herself! And somethin else! A general advice from me to all you: Be you and live every minute in your life like being the last one... Only by doing it you will be really happy! Kisses!!!
Gender: Female
Location: Greece
Age: 15
Member Since: December 4, 2005
Answers: 59
Last Update: December 25, 2005
Visitors: 6237
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Hey well i have this one friend and it seems like she is always pressuring me to do stuff that im not ready 4 like she pressured me into Kissing my boyfriend that i had only been going with 4 a lil bit and yah i didnt really know him that much but she always gettin in my buisness but i don't know how to tell her to stop!!
Like this week end she wants me to go to the movies only so that my bf and i can make out and i don't know wat to do cause i want to do wateva when im ready..!! So can some 1 give a sista advice on how to get her "friend" of her back??
love lissa (link)
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Look, what you should do is to tell her what you think. Because i am sure that she does it because she cares about your relationship with this boy or because she just cares about you don't get mad. Just tell her that you do what you want, not what everyone else tells you. Tell her that you understand why she is doing it but tell her to let you make your own choses. That's the best. If she continues don't tell her anything and do whatever you want. Don't do what she tells you. Just ignore her. Got it? I hope i helped...:):):):)
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Regards,
First of all, let me clear a thing... I'm fairly in the air... I had passed a hard day and for now, I'm exteremly confused, like i have never been before... I just need some help, adivse or anything that could be any of help...
My story begins from two months ago. when I actually decided to start a new PLP type relationship with a girl in my university for the first time in my life... we both are studying electronics engineering. I just have two term to finish the
lessons, while she has 4 terms to go... I dont know if these informations do any help, but in any way, I'm trying to be precise here...
Before this, I had absolutely no idea in dating with girls. I had never speaked with someone because of my FEELINGs. so when I came to this situation, I started to read some books. I learned a lot of things, but the most interesting, yet frightening part of them was the sentence " Hunters, Move FAST !!"... it becames the QUEEN of my mind...
I started some basics like intense gaze, making eye contact, giving a nod, doing body language, and sometimes, a very short smile... I was unexperienced, but I think that I was doing fine... she usually returned my gaze with a one second look and when I turned back and looked around, she did the same... after following this routine for a month or so, I decided to make the first conversation. I had nothing special to say, but I just wanted to let her know that I'm interested in her. I was still frightened from that sentence, you know... and that caused a lot of trouble.
One day, all of a sudden, I walked beside her in the corridor ( she was walking with one of her friends ) and asked her to listen to my words for a minute. she stoped walking and looked into my eyes. I become blind. i lost my words and started to say bunkum. I told her that I want to say something, but I can't. because it's a little bit hard for me for the first time... she looked again into my eyes and when she was leaving, she said that "it's not necessary to say anything"... i become fed up.
I had her phone number from before. so I wrote an sms and told her how much I love her... I told that this was all the things that I wanted to tell her in the first approach. but there was no reply.
after a week or so, I wrote another sms. romantic and warm. I wrote that I want to give it another try and I asked for her approval. this time, my sms didn't remained unanswered. she replied, but what a reply. she said that i must stop acting like this... she said that she is not interested AT ALL, and my previous SMS has no value for her. she also asked me to stop sending another sms... well, as I know myself, I don't give up easily. but this time, i felt that it's better to finish the game with one last try. i wrote another sms and I said that i feel sorry for acting unseasoned. i also wrote that if she give no answer, I assume the game finished. easy to guess. NO REPLY.
I did what i said. I started to forget all the things we left behind. but I couldn't resolve one thing... if she was not interested AT ALL, why she returned my gazes ? why she flipped for me, when standing a few meters away ? why she was always in my sight, wherever i was ? why she was doing womanish body language all the time ? in class, in yard, in everywhere ?
I couldn't figure that out. so after a month, I sent her another sms. I didn't act like before. I didn't give out my power. I wrote that I must speak with her. I told that the way how we do this is not important. I just want to say some untold and nothing more or less. 3 days after sending this unanswered sms, we participated in an common class. when the class has been finished, there were 6 person remaining in the class. me and 2 friends of mine, and she, and 2 friends of her... the situation was not suitable. so I left the class. but she remained. I stayed beside the class for almost 30 minute. but she didn't came out. so I assumed this as a passport and entered the class...She was sitting alone !! I started up with some ordinary words,but I felt that she's not interested at all. so i did a trick. I asked her that what I should do for now ? I asked this with smile. I tried to be funny and cooky. fortunately she looked at me and said "what ?" she apparently couldn't hide her smile... and we started a long talk... in the middle of conversation, she said that she doesn't want to become friend with a boy. I replied asap, "but I didn't asked you that". she smiled. I continued " what if I ask you to help me on a project?" and she replied with smile " I never ever participate on a project with a boy"... after a minute or two, I asked her if this is a type of one-way love and she said that "There is no DOUBT"... I gazed at her and asked the same thing again. she looked down and said nothing... in the end, she said that I better forget all the things. I asked her for a logical reason, but she had nothing to say. she just called it "something Personal". and we ends up like this... I said goodbye and left the class...
Now, I don't understand. what all this means ? is she still examining me ? Do I did something wrong ? do I have to forget all the things ? should I continue the same things again and again and again ? I'm pretty confused...
Please excuse my bad english. I'm just looking for an advise. I have never wrote a novel like this...
Thanks for all your generosity and attention in advance. (link)
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What a story! Ok, i am a girl and i understand her. I think she really doesn't know what to do. Maybe she doesn't want something with someone this period. But when we avoid someone we are always with others! We don't stay in class... And something else. Smiling and looking at you are good things! But, she said you that she doesn't want neither a friend nor a boyfriend. That means what she says. Well, she might likes you ok. But she doesn't want a relationship right now.
What you should do is to let her. Don't send sms and don't talk to her. Let her a little bit because some girls are like that:When you show them that you don't like them they want you because you make the difference(beautiful girls).
And i think that she needs time, space... Let her and see what she does. Coming where you are?Looking at you? Smiling at you? Then tell her sth. If not, let her and find an other one.Come on! There are a lot of girls out there!I hope i helped...
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All of my friends and family tell me that I am beautiful, and so pretty. But when I look in the mirror, I am like.."eww." I can't take it anymore, I feel disgusted at myself. When I first meet people, they go, "wow you are beautiful!" I don't know if they are telling the truth or not. I have had people come up to me and ask if I model. But when I look in the mirror, I just don't see it. I have a boyfriend, he is wonderful, but he never tells me that I am beautiful. I went to a dance with him and he calls me up after and says, "hey, sorry I forgot to say you looked really nice tonight." and well he never said I look pretty or anything. I just don't know what to do. Is there any way to gain confidence on your looks? I am very outgoing..but sometimes I get so self conscious that I feel like I just want to go home and stay in the house. I am pretty popular at my school so I know it isn't a social disorder thing, because I have no problem with making friends. I just am so self conscious. Does anybody know of a way to stop being this way?
-14/F (link)
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Of course!This is not that difficult as it seems. If you want to try you will do it!!! What happens to you is that you have genarally low self esteem and low self confidence.
Now,1) How to Feel Good When You Need to
Because self confidence and feeling good has a major 'hormonal' element, you can change the way you feel by re-living good times. If you can remember a time you felt really self confident, then excellent - use that! If not, then use a time you felt contented or happy. You could use a photo taken at such a time to remind you. This is just a start but an important one; taking deliberate control of your thoughts and emotions will have a huge impact on your self confidence and other areas of your life.
2) Beating Self Consciousness
Too much self consciousness is the No.1 enemy of self confidence. The trick is keeping your attention off yourself when you need to. Here's how...
a) When you feel self-conscious, (you can usually tell because you start to feel anxious), choose something outside of yourself to focus on and study it in detail. For example: examine a door, look at the different textures and shades of colour, wonder about who made it and how and so on. The important thing is that you're learning how to keep your attention off yourself.
It is a good idea to practise this technique in private first. Just sit quietly, practising focusing firstly on your own thoughts and then deliberately focusing outwards onto a picture or piece of furniture.
b) Social self confidence can be difficult to find sometimes because it is unclear what you are 'supposed to do'. In this event, concentrate on what your purpose in the situation is: whether you're there to...
- find out if you like the other people present
- make others feel comfortable
- find out some information
- make business contacts
- and so on...
It's much more difficult to feel self-conscious if your mind is occupied with a task.
People are often most comfortable with others when working towards a common goal. The common goal of socialising could be making friends, the exchange of mutually beneficial information, expanding your knowledge of different types of people... it could be whatever you want it to be! The key is to have an aim.
3) Watch Out for Undue Criticism - Especially Your Own!
Have you noticed that people will speak to themselves in a way they would never speak to others? You know the sort of thing - you break a glass and it's "You stupid idiot. You can't do anything right can you?"
Criticism that leaves the receiver feeling upset or depressed is rarely useful.
Challenging your own assumptions about yourself and other people can really help build self confidence. Here's a few to get you started:
Those confident-looking people have bad moments too - you just don't get to hear about them!
If you feel under-confident, it doesn't mean other people can tell. They're often too caught up with their 'own stuff' to notice!
If you catch yourself saying things to yourself like "I'm no good at anything" then rest assured, you're wrong about that. Everyone can compose a sentence, get successfully to the store, eat without choking and do a million other things. Negative thinking can make things seem hopeless when they rarely are.
Don't let yourself make sweeping statements about yourself - in the long run it is this sort of thing that can really damage your self image. If this happens, say to yourself calmly and gently, "Hold on a minute, that's not true". If you can come up with some evidence that disproves the sweeping statement, then even better. It may take a bit of effort at first, but the impact on your level of self confidence is huge.
Building self esteem is not just about thinking good of yourself, it's about not thinking bad for no reason!
Just because you have felt bad about yourself in the past doesn't mean you're always going to feel that way. I have seen hundreds of people surprise themselves once they have learned exactly how to build confidence in themselves in such a way that it stays built!
The important thing is to get away from thinking "Why did that happen?" or "Why do I feel this way?" and instead move towards "How would I like to feel?", "In what situations do I feel confident?" or "What do I need to learn in order to have better self confidence in this situation?"
And something else.Try to make other feel good. Give advice or help others. And SMILE! When you feel bad smile! That helps A LOT!
P.S. The above solutions are not mine! So be sure that it works! I hope i helped! Kisses!
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OK
sooo Ive been best friends with this girl for about 3 and a half years. I can tell her everything, and i mean, everything. I used to be able to trust her with everything, and when she said " i promise" .. she meant it. Ever since she got her new boyfriend about 8 months ago though, the boy (lets call him "JOn"). has completely taken over. I feel like there is no more rooom for "jaime friendship,".. and that JOn has taken over my spot in her life. We used to hang out like every other day (about), and now , its gotten down to once or twice a every two months. Kinda sad, I think. :(
I dunno.. its adding so much stress to my life. Ive tried explaining to her how much she means to me and everything, but she just doesnt get it. I know this may sound sad.. but I love this girl a lot.. I mean who wouldnt love their bffe?... but i hate the way she treats me. Boys are only in youre life for so long.. but girlfriends can last a lifetime, and i dont think she unserstands that. (notice the subject "your teenage years are supposed to be spent looking for bridesmaids, not grooms" .... Yes, I realize that life gets more complicated as you get older.. and now that she is 16, she has a job .. where she works everyday... Literally, EVERYDAY after school and work though, she talks and talks with her boyfriend on the phone alll night long, and if i call, guess who she hangs up with? YUp, me. I know this may just sound like jealousy, and it is kinda.. but its gotten more than that. To top off things, her boyfriend used to be MY best GUY friend for about 2 years.. and now i completely cant stand him. I honestly, I wish he would just move to a diff state. LIterally. When i am around them two , I cant stand it. They only care about their realtionship. I think that it is plain RUDe to sit there at a table at lunch with your bffe and boyfriend.. and sit there, and hug and kiss him , and ignore your bffe. HOw awkward it is for me. I feel liek shit constantly, but when im alone with my bffe.. and her boyfriend isnt arounf we have THE BEST of times, and cant stop laughing. Its like we give eachother a natural high. Im just so sad and depressed now that it feels like ive been "replaced" though... Any suggestions on what i should do?? (link)
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Honey,
you have to understand that she still loves you very much. This is sure. But try to understand her. She might thinks that she has found the boyfriend of her life and that she loves him that much and she doesn't want to lose him. I can see how you feel now but i think that the best thing you could do is to talk to your friend. Apart from explaining her how important she is to you tell her how you feel. That you feel like being replaced. I am sure she will understand you. This is the best solution because nobody else can know exactly what is going on. Tell her that you care about her and that you understand how much she loves her boyfriend but explain her your opinion about your friendship... You have to do this.
But not overdo this. Understand that she is different and that she wants this boyfriend. She doesn't want to lose him. Right? And understand that we have to be open mind and accept other people too. Otherwise sometime somehow you will get bored...
P.S. i hope i helped. Before half a year i had a bf and my friend told me that she feels alone and i understood her. Your bffe will understand you too.
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well me and this guy were going o ut for almost two years and then we slit up because we now go to different schools. well we were friends and everything until today he asked me out.. i don't like him in that way anymore, i just want to be friends. i'm deffanitly going to say no, but how should i put it? please help, were in 7th grade btw...
thanks! ill rate.. (link)
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How can you say it?Look, i suggest telling what you think this time it will happen because these things cannot be said earlier.They come spontaneously! But let's try!
"Well, when we were together i liked you very much.Really...But now, i grew up and i generally have different views...I believe that when someone feels that is a friend with someone else they should stay friends.That's what i believe. I think that you are a hondsome boy but you are a very good friend of mine and i don't want to lose such a good friend!I think that friendships last but relationships no. Only serious things last and i am not ready for serious things.So what about staying friends?"
I think that he will understand you and not only that. He will understand that you are a mature girl and that you are an honest person. Good things a friend can have! Don't you think???
I hope i helped you!
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Okay, so I told my friend that I found a guy interesting (as in he seems to have the same interests as me) and she just goes "ew, him? he looks stupid and he's not eve hot." i told her im not superficial and besides i want him as a friend so whats it matter?
in french class she asked me if i "still liked him" and i said yes, and she dissed him again.
another day i told her i saw him and i shouldve talked to hi but i didn't, and she says "doesn't matter, it's a waste of time anyway, haha sorry"
now im really pissed. she talks to me about this Kyle guy that she likes and she said she stayed up until 11 talking to him online and i told her he's a waste of time, for obvious reasons, and she said no he isnt blahblahblah...
what can i tell her to get her to shut her mouth and to accept the fact that i am not superficial like she is? i want to be able to mention him without her putting him down. (link)
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This is not a friend!Sorry, but this is a bitch! Excuse me, but how can you let her talk like that for the one you like? She should respect you first of all. Your feelings, your opinions, the boy you like. She is not a real friend. i do not think that you should continue trusting her. Stop telling her about him. That is better... Or tell her that you do not care about her opinion.
If you do not like that tell her to stop talking like that for the one you like and continue being friend with your "friend".
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My friend anita has been kinda of mean lately. we've never had a fight but we've known each other since we were about 7 (i'm 14 now) everytime i ring her to ask her to come out she always has something else to do like clean her room or the living room or something like that. the only time she wants to come out is when she has to go to the shop for school or her parents and i think shes just using me for that because she doesn't like walking to the shop by herself!i don't no what to do! should i try to igore her for a while? should i just ignore the whole thing and carry on with whats going on?please help!
p.s. i rate 5's (link)
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I think that you should talk to her. Tell her:"I think that something is going wrong the last days. I think you ignore me. Do you remember when(tell one of the times she ignored you)?What is going on?I thought we are friends."Remember being calm and patient.
If she will tell you that you are wrong do not tell her anything. If she will continue ignoring you ignore her too and go out with other friends. If not forgive her.
If she will tell you what is going on try to understand her and talk about it with her. Remember!Be calm and understanding!I think that such an old friend deserves a second chance!Good luck!!!
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OK a bunch of my guy friends have been acting VERY immature and disrespectful lately. They'd lie to me, disrespect me, my friends, some of their friends (who are girls, of course), teachers, etc. They'd tell me one of my best friends are against me, and all my guys friends are against me. Theers this girl i really hate, but my best guy friend would see her staring at him and he'd scream to her "TURN AROUND AND NEVER LOOK AT ME AGAIN! YOUR SO UGLY!" and i'm starting to find all this very disrespectful. Another one of my guy friends also spit on my cousins/best friends head. When she told the principal, the kid said it was "by accident." although after he spit, he ran away with his friend and started laughing without saying sorry or ANYTHING to her.
Me and two of my best friends want to take action and start getting the respect everyone needs from these guys. Does anyone have any ideas to help us start off? thank you! (link)
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Yes...You can do only one thing. BE YOU. If you do not like going out with him or something like that do not do this again. You do not need anyone. If you do not like their behaviour just tell it. At the beggining they will laugh at it or be really surprised but only by doing it you will make things change. The next time they will do sth like this with the cousin go away. Let them alone. Stand up and go somewhere else. Generally make them understand that you do not like their behaviour.If they find you ok and want to go out with you they will stop doing silly things. If not, you do not care. Com'n!They do not deserve it!
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My Friend stayed with me last night and we were so bored out of our minds....there isnt anything to do! Can yall tell me some things to do so next time it wont be so boring? A few things that might help you: we are female, 15 years old...i dont think theres anything else yall NEED to know...please and thank you! (link)
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I am fifteen too and female too. So, i will tell you some things i do with my friend...
#1Talk about boys.What better???Sending atext message to the one you like or just plan how you could make him like you.
#2Plan a party or the next big thing that will make everyone talk about you!
#3If you are alone at home call some other friends. Boys and girls!!!
#4Listen to music and talk about stars and the news in Hollywood.
#5Play sth like truth or dare.Difficult things! Imagine your friend going and kissing a boy she likes? Terrible!
#6 You can read magazines and do some tests. Funny tests and magazines you like. Teen magazines are good...
#7Do whatever you want!!!Plan the next crazy thing you will do or the moment you are there do whatever you think. And say whatever you want. This will help your friendship too!!!
HAVE FUN!!!
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My friend is really cool and stuff but sometimes she can be a huge pain in the butt. She has a lot of boy troubles. She is kind of mean to most boys and will like hit them and stuff. She still likes boys though. She says that no guys like her because she is fat, short, and ugly. Thats not true at all though she is really pretty. Then she says that everyone likes me(which isn't true) and she says that I'm miss prefect because I'm actually nice to guys. It makes me really mad. how do I tell her in a nice way that She is too mean to guys and that if she is nicer to them she might be able to get a boyfriend. I will rate answers! (link)
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Congratulations! You are a really good friend... If the situation is like that you should do something quickly! When you tow will be alone tell her that thing:"You know what i read somewhere? That all others behave to you in the way you behave to them!So, the moment i read it i remembered you. You know what? You are a really beautiful girl and to be honest i am a little bit jeallous but because you are my friend i will tell something to you. If you will start behaving them a little bit more politely they will all like you! And this one you like. I think that boys like polite and sweet girls that is why i try to be like that. They are so weird! To be honest, i like authentic people! But boys are not like us! Will you start being like that too?" I think that she will understand what you mean. Remember that you do that because you are her friend and you really care about her. If something will go wrong tell her that you love her and this is why you said it. For her own good. If she is a real friend she will understand you!
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There this guy in my gym class and he's a senior and I'm a freshman. Well I kinda like him and when I would see him in the halls I would tell my friends "oh that's the guy I like", but what I also meant was that I want to get to know him. Someone told him that I like him and well yeah he knows I like him and he knows who I am. I want to talk to him but I'm just so shy you know. So I was thinking that maybe I should just start talking to him. This is what I want to say
HEY YOUR ______(HIS NAME)RIGHT?
WELL I'M ______(MY NAME)
I THINK YOU HEARD THAT I SO-CALLED LIKE YOU, AND WHEN I SAID LIKE I MEANT TO GET TO KNOW YOU. ITS NOT THAT I LIKE YOU CUZ TO LIKE SOMEONE YOU NEED TO KNOW THEM AND I DONT KNOW YOU SO I GUESS ITS JUST A CRUSH?
okay hows that sound? any ideas? how should i start cuz i mean what if hes playin basketball or something i cant just walk up to him and just start talking. WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!!???
PLEASE HELP ME!THANK YOU!!
(link)
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Look, you should meet him when he will be alone. Try it but if you always see him with others go there with self confidence and tell him that you want to tell him sth. He comes. Then tell something smart and something that will surprise him. I mean not the usual things! For example smile and tell him"I suppose you know me right?" Or sth like that. You know why? Cause you want a dialogue and you want him to feel comfortably! So, afterwards, tell him that he is one hondsome boy but to like someione means much more. Explain him that you think he is a cute boy etc. but you do not know his personality so when you was saying that you like him you didn't mean it that seriously! Let him answer and if he will say that he understood it tell"Oh, i knew you are not only cute but smart too!" And tell your name. If he will say that he thought sth else tell him that you would like to hang out once and get known better. That would be a great chance for you!
P.S.I it is really important to talk to him and sth else! From now on, do not trust people that easily... Kisses and good luck!
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