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advice
i'm female
okay, i've been 'best friends' with this girl for 3 years now and we're really close! but i sometimes feel we only talk, and i mean really talk when theres something wrong in one of our lives. and i was just wondering if thats normal, i mean like, do quite a lot of 'best friends' act like just friends until theres a time when they really need each other?
make sure that she thinks of you as a best friend too because that might be the situation. does she tell other people that YOUR her best friend or does she just say that she has alot? this could be part of the problem. also it might just be in your head. she might see you as a best friend and you see her as one too but you know how to show more affection towards the situation whereas she only knows how to act like a friend because shes not used to being so close with someone.
hi, i'm have a small sleepover at a hotel with some friends, there is one girl whom i've known since the 5th grade (i went to the new school and the teacher put me next to her) we haven't even been CLOSE we just happen to hang out with the same people although NO ONE in my entire class likes her, i guess its just her attitude, and she is a tattle tell, she can also be immature (by the way we are eighth grade)my mom wants me to invite her because she "is a part of the group" like i said no one likes her, i know if i didn't invite her and she saw pictures we take she will feel bad, and i will feel bad
but at the same time i don't want to invite her and have her annoy everyone else (including me)
another thing, she has a medical problem (not terminal or anything serious) but i know her personality and i don't want her to go all crazy on me (knowing her she might confront me and get very man)
i hope its not too long, or complicated
but please help! should i invite her so i don't feel bad, but feel stupid for inviting her
or should i not invite her enjoy my party, but feel bad for not including her (or get guilt tripped by her)
thanks so much
-kelsy
aww i've been in the same situation!
okay so heres my point of view,
you think maybe you should invite her so that you dont feel guilty about it later and so that she doesnt take it out on you afterwards.
then again you think you shouldnt because she might be mean or something may go wrong because people don't like her.
theres two points i can peel out for you.
1. her getting "mad you didn't invite her" shouldnt be a reason to invite her. if she's someone who's going to be mean and selfish that you didnt invite her when you guys arent even that close of friends anyway, it makes the decision that much easier. would you really want someone like that at your party anyway?
2. do what YOU feel is right. if you think "hey maybe this is an opportunity for us all to become closer and we can talk and actually become good friends" then hey, go for it! but if your thinking "oh no she'll be so mean.." then maybe you should second think it.
do what YOU want to do. this is your decision, nobody elses.
hope i helped,
lalaloverxo.
ok well heres the deal or prob, theres this guy that i like and he likes me back, but today monday 1/28/08 he broke up with his gf and i think that hes going to go out with this chika named amanda but they were suppose to go out but he then decided to stay with his gf wich is now his ex, but like i was saying she was thinking about going out with his borther and fucking him and then rubbing it in josh's face for not going out with her(amanda), and i don't know what to do ,b/c i'm ingaged to this guy but not really we have bine on and off all the time for the past 5 years, and his name is dana and i love him but aparently amanda wants to go back out with him and i don't know if he wants her or me last time it was for his ex kathy who by the way is in 6th grade and hes in 9th grade, ok heres the questoin (WHO SHOULD I GO OUT WITH JOSH OR DANA?) and by the way my dad doesn't know that i like this josh guy but my dad doesn't like josh but he likes dana a lot more. but i don't know who i should date josh or dana. please any one please help me i don't know what to do?
woaahh haha.
okay well first of all, if you really truly loved dana, you wouldn't have to chose between him and josh.
maybe you like him like crazy or love him as your age is now, but if it was love you wouldn't have to think about chosing.
i think if you picked josh, you would have quite a rew problems.
first, your dad doesnt like him alot and parents oppinions on boyfriends are really important to a relationship.
and secondly, you would get in quite a conflict with this girl amanda.
she wouldn't do stuff with his brother and then rub it in his face if she wasn't trying to get him jealous.
so she clearly wants him.
but on the other hand,
if dana is on and off with you for a girl THAT much younger, maybe neither of them are truthfuly the right decision.
you'll find someone eventualy, but both of these guys just sound like a huge heartache to me.
hope i helped,
lalaloverxo :)
14/f
ok so I have this friend...when we're like just hanging out the two of us or even in a small group (it's better with just girls) she's so much fun to hang out with and I love being her friend! but other times...
like she kinda is the leader of our "group" i guess...and I think she sort of realized it lately and has gotten kind of bitchy and "i rule the worldish" ((and also realized that a lot of guys like -or used to like- her and has become a HUGE flirt even though she has a boyfriend)) like she remarked that she figured the only reason that her ex (of almost 3 months) was hugging his gal friends (her friends too, mutual group) was to make her jealous when it reality he really really doesn't like her like that any more and was just being friendly which isnt uncommen behavior in our guy friends
shes also the kind who claims to hate conflict so if your getting in an argument with her she'll hang up or walk away which makes this kind of tricky (i think it's stupid cause it actually prolongs the conflict into a full blown out ignoring each other fight but whatever)
she used to be a really great friend and shes still fun to hang out with but how do i tell her all this stuff thats bothering me (and a few others of us) without getting into a fight..
it also doesn't help that we're in kind of a fight (about some stupid crap) right now that i'm kind of sort of trying to resolve...
please help! how do I tell her? should I tell her? what should I do?
you HAVE to tell her, no questions asked.
if you really want her to stay your friend, you need to talk.
call her, it's more personal.
if that somehow doesn't work out or she doesn't answer etc.. just IM her, text her, e-mail her, message her.. really anything.
i doubt she'll ignore it.
spill out all your feelings.
don't be aftraid to tell her something, say it all.
just try not to make it sound bitchy or it could turn into a fight and nobody wants that.
hope i hepled
Apparently my so called best friend is jealous of me. She sent an email to my boyfriend saying that we spend too much time together and she never gets to hang out with him anymore. I dont understand this cause she has been trying to get me to break up with him for a while now. I hate that everyone is trying to break us up. I really want to die. No one wants me happy. I think Im just going to tell him we need a break once again. Idk. I thought she cared about me but I guess she just wanted him. I love her to death and I dont even know what to say anymore. I cant trust anyone.!!!!!
she is not a true best friend if she's trying to get you two to break up.
the only reason she is doing this is because she likes him.
please, she is not worth it!
if you really like this guy, talk to your friend and tell her how much it hurt you to see her flirting with him.
do not break up with him if you liek him.
that will just make you an unhappy wreck, and that is pointless.
thats just like chopping your hand off because someone else wanted it and it would make them happy if you did it.
its pointless, and useless.
maybe if people are still telling you to break up with him after this, you should have a secret relationship.
like, not telling anyone.
these can be difficult but there is much less drama.
my friend threw a sleepover party last
night and i wasn't invited.. yeah she
could only have 11 people.. and they
prank phone called me like at 1 a.m and
it was obvious it was them because i heard
tons of laughing in the background.. they
didn't say anything mean but for some
reason the fact that they prank phone
called me and probably said something
about me while doing it is pissing me off..
i mean like why prank call ME ?! why not
someone they don't like.. ughh
i think its immature
what should i do?
am i overreacting?
Truthfully, don't worry about it.
girls always do that kindof stuff,
and even if it is MAJORLY IMMATURE of them..
don't sweat it.
they probolly prank called alot of other people, not just you.
maybe you just havnt heard about it because the people they called either didn't know it was them, or didn't pick up (i mean face it.. it was 1:00 am!)
so just don't even bring it up to them and forget about it.
it's no big deal at all.
My best friend, Jackie, is going out with this guy, Joe. Joe is one of my really good guy friends. Anyways, I like Joe as a friend and nothing more. But when they will do stuff together i find myself getting kind of jealous and for some reason I want them to break up. Joe and I flirt sometimes but it's nothing major. anyways im the one that got them together and helps Joe with all the relationship problems, but it makes me kind of depressed when he talks about how much he loves her and that he wants to stay together with her for years.
And then the other night he was like, "Haha i love you ___(my name)" he meant it in a friendly way but it like gave me a weird feeling in my stomach. But I'm like positive I don't like him! So what's up with this? How can i get over it?
okay, its alright, your just jealous, not because
you like him or anything major like that, but because she has a boyfriend that cares that much about her. You want to have a relationship like that too and by seeing how sweet he is to her, it makes you sortof want him. Don't worry, you'll find someone just as great as him. Try not to interfere with their relationship though. If you
flirt with him too much, he may start to like you.
and even if that makes you smile a little, if you had a boyfriend that treated you so well and your BEST FRIEND was sortof interfering with it, would't you be upset?
ps.. 90% of the time guys say i love you to their friends.. they mean it. i think this guy may have feelings for you.
I wasn't really sure what to put this under, bu there is a dance this coming friday and I don't have anyone to go with and I''m not sure whether I should go or not. My friends are going just with friends, but I don't really look good in a dress and can't stand wearing high heels. It sounds like fun, but I don't want to look awkward in front of everyone. Plus I don't have a dress or shoes. What should I do?
of course you should go! it's a great experience and time to meet new people, and to just have a great time. go with your friends for now, and if any cute guys ask you to dance, you can go with them. If you don't want to wear a dress, try to find a cute skirt and shirt or dress pants to wear. or, even if any of your friends have an outfit you can wear. plus, you definatky don't have to wear heels. there are plenty of really nice dressy shoes, that are flatts.
Hope i helped
last summer i met this guy at camp, and he was really cool and really cute. He told me he liked me, and i started to like him. well, we live in different states, so we only talked on myspace. I stopped liking him pretty much the week after camp. well, eventually we stopped talking and i guess he deleted me from his friends. we haven't talked in over 3 months now. Well, last night, i got a friend request and a message from him. He is COMPLETELY different and i'm not sure if i want to go back to being friends. He has a girlfriend, so he's def. not trying to get me to like him again.. but idk what to do. Should i talk to him?
okay well, you two definatly can't pick up from where you left off if you know what i mean, but there is absolutly no reason you shouldn't be friends with him again. he most likely just deleted you from his friends because he was upset you didn't talk anymore. i think you should definatly give him a chance as a friend.
i'm 14 years old and i recently got a boyfriend that i really like, and me and him are doing great. but, since i've got this boyfriend, i seem to be spending less time with my friends. and they've been getting mad at me some. it's not that i don't want to hang out with them, i just somehow make plans with my boyfriend first. if anyone has advice on how i can manage friends & a boyfriend please help. i greatly appreciate it.
thanks,
xo megan.
i can understand completely where your coming from. i had a friend in the same position as you. Well, for your friends to know you love them and always will, plan a night just for them. Go to the movies with just you and them [without your boyfriend!] maybe on lie a friday night, then hangout with your boyfriend on saturday. also, it might seem like you hangout with him alot more than you do if you talk about him alot. while your with your friends just try to keep the talk about him on the downlow.
15/f
Why is it that whenever a person tells another person a secret or something ...some kind of news.....and that person is close to the other person...and no matter how much you BEG them...and PLEAD NOT to tell the secret...they still ALWAYS do.
What does this mean? Should I stop telling people secret stuff?...I mean....How can I NOT?....I tell my own SISTER stuff....and she spills the beans.
How can this be stopped?
What should I do if I crave to let my emotions and secrets out? Because there's a lot building up inside of me over time. And I can't be trusting of ANYONE anymore...since like all of them (the people) basically stuck a fork up my ass. And backstabbed me with a dagger.
:(
you might want to keep a diary of some sort.
if your friends and siblings have stabbed you in the back, most likely, they will do it again. If you need to let your emotions out you could keep a journal or something in your room and write down all of your secrets. Just make sure you hide it really well, and don't tell anyone you have it, or they might just go looking for it, and tell people your secrets.