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Hello ,
I'm just wondering what do you think true love really is ?
Thank you ,
Betty. (link)
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True love is when you would never consciously do anything to hurt the person you love and you would rather suffer yourself. It's when you tell your partner they're great and beautiful even when you see all their flaws compared to people greater and more beautiful then them, but you want to make them more self-confident. And you would always choose them over all those greater and more beautiful people! It's when the most important thing in your life is for the person you love to be happy.
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This might be long. Bear with me, please.
All the time I read questions about your best friend having feelings for you and you not knowing what to do. I just gave a whatever answer. Now I'm in the same situation and I guess I know how those people felt when they came here to ask their questions...
I'm 18/f. I've known my best friend (17/f) for about 2.5 years. Friends haven't lasted for longer than a year with me since I move a lot with my family, so this is just wow for me. We've been through everything together. We hang out a lot and most of the time, we talk about homosexuality and all that. She's never had a bf before, so she thinks she's better of being a lesbo or a bi. I have a bf (for a year now) but I still joked around saying that I'd like to try it with a 'she' one day.
One day, my bf called me and said that he thinks that my best friend is his 'competition'. I was like, wtf...Anyway. And I never really knew why my best friend hated my bf.
So on Friday, me and my best friend went out and we had something to 'drink'. I had 2 sips even though I'm addicted to alcohol like hell. She had way too much to drink, and she drank fast. She got drunk and I had to drive her home with her car, blah blah. We got home, and she was all giggly and dizzy and she threw up 4 times. I was with her through this whole thing, helping her, bringing her water to wash her face, etc. Now, they say that drunk people speak 100% truth when they're totally wasted. So after she finished puking, she closed her eyes and said "I love you". I sensed a different tone in her face - not a drunk one, but a really innocent honest one. I told her "No, I'm your best friend". She opened her eyes, looked at me and said "No, I love you". At that point I broke down and started crying, I dunno why...
I'm really confused because I think I might have feelings for her too. Next morning, she woke up and told me she didn't remember anything after she got home. I told her what happened, but I didn't tell her about her 'confession'. I don't think I want to. But that's not fair for her...also, I don't want her to think I'm abusing her or her decision of being a lesbo or bi and 'trying' it with her just because she's the only one available.
Keep in mind that i have a boyfriend who i'm in love with so much. He jokes saying "if you're gonna kiss a girl, make sure you do it in front of me" and stuff but I know he'd be so heartbroken. I need help. How do I confront her? I'm scared to face my best friend. I haven't seen or talked to her since Friday. And it's summer and the schools are over and she expects to hang out with me like ... everyday!
She's a great person but I don't want our friendship to be ruined...should I just wait till she tells me about it when she's not drunk next time and not tell her anything at all or ... should I forget it happened?
Thanks in advance even if you're one of those people who read the questions but don't answer. (link)
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Your friend is single and you're the closest person she has in her life. You've been through so many things together, you can talk about everything, and naturally she started having feelings for you. For most people it's hard being single, and she is probably yearning for a romantic relationship.
The good thing here is that she doesn't EXPECT you to fill that place in her life, and by all means don't give her hope unless you really feel the same about her! This is what you have to ask yourself - who do you want to be with, her or your boyfriend? I assume your answer will be 'boyfriend', so the best thing to do is let your best friend stay exactly what she is, your best friend.
I don't think you have to confront her about what she said. While it helps sometimes, there are situations where it would cause more damage than good. You already know deep in your heart that she meant what she said, and you know it's not her fault. Neither of you did anything shameful. But it's necessary that you make it clear you're in love with your boyfriend and you're not going to become romantically or sexually involved with her. So no more 'I'd like to try it with a girl' statements, because she will read into it more than you would want her to. I'm all for experimentation, but breaking your boyfriend's heart and losing your best friend aren't worth it!
If you want to talk more about it, feel free to message me at any time :)
Love,
Agnes
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I am posting this but I am not sure if I posted it already so if I did just ignore this one: I just want to ask you do you think people should dwell on a comment or stu about a comment that was made to
them an hour ago, a day ago, a week ago, a month ago, months ago, a year ago or years ago. The reason I am
asking is because I have an excellent memory but I noticed if I confront someone about something they said they
say to me "I said that" or they will say "I never said that".
(link)
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I'm sorry but... obviously you don't have such an excellent memory! :p
(feel free to rate this 1)
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I've been best friends with this guy since freshman year and we use to call each other almost daily on a regular basis to chat. Even after i changed schools we still talked and stuff. But recently he got a girlfriend (off of WoW3) which really surprised me since he use to grip about how retarded online relationships. After that, he totally changed. He stopped talking to me, spent so much time (pretty much when hes not in school) with his girlfriend on the phone or online (she lives in chicago, we live in cali) and just got so obssessed with her. Shes two years older and planning on moving to california when he graduates from high school and goes to college (this year). Just these few weeks, it became apparent that his girlfriend really got annoyed when i called him to talk and was bitching to him about it. And what he said to me today just hurt a lot and made me cry, since i didnt think he'd just throw me away for his girlfriend, but apparently he did.
Him: I need you to stop calling me
Him: I don't want you to think that I like you
Him: and you shouldn't ever have thought that I'd want to talk to you more than *girlfriend*
me: uh...
me: i never thought you liked me..
me: wtf
Him: Well good, just don't call me anymore
Him: It's irritating, and *Girlfriend* hates it too
I dont know how or why he said that, but it really hurt. since we use to have so much fun hanging out and talking over the phone. I just want to be good friends with him but apparenty there isnt even room for his girlfriend and his best girl friend anymore. What am i suppose to do? Just agree and stop talking to him completely? I dont want to lose my best friend just because his girlfriend is so overprotective of him and refuses to let him even talk to other girls over the phone. (link)
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God, I'm really shocked, I mean, even if he really had to say all those things he could have said it in a lot nicer way! Look, try to focus on other people who actually appreciate your friendship, since at the time being this guy is obviously, how shall I put it... not quite himself. I guess he's so infatuated with his girlfriend that he can't think clearly. Don't call him if he doesn't want that, but try not to despair - if he continues to feel that way about you, and if he doesn't realize he's done you wrong and call you to apologize, he wasn't worth your friendship anyway!
That part about not liking you probably meant that he didn't like you in the romantic sense, because he wouldn't have talked to you every day if he didn't like you as a friend. However, people change, and he has become a different person, a person who obviously doesn't value what you had. Try looking into the future instead of looking back, and don't make waiting for him to change his mind the main purpose of your life - you will meet other people, equally fun and good friends, and if he ever wants to be your friend again, great! If not, well, it's his loss, not yours, because you don't won't someone in your life who doesn't realize what a great person you are!
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