Hey everyone! The names Melissa and I'm just dying to help everyone out.
Sometimes i might be brutally honest but that's what people need!
If you need some help or have a question feel free to send me a message I would be more than happy to help!
Gender: Female
Location: Pennsylvania
Occupation: Sales Associate
Age: 21
MSN: missy_meliss@live.com
Member Since: February 18, 2010
Answers: 264
Last Update: July 20, 2011
Visitors: 16042
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Matt
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so i like this guy and he said he liked me but not that much. i texted him and we talked,and i got a message from him at 1:00 am saying "hey why r u ignoring me?" so i tried to get ahold of him and he told me that i was getting annoying, so i told him i would stop talking to him, and he said that he still wanted to talk to me, just not all the time. so i want to know, could this guy have feelings for me? (link)
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Honestly...no I dont think he has feelings for you. He wouldnt tell you that you were annoying him if he liked you.
Find someone else.
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I started to realize my friend who I became friends with at the beginning of the school year is a complete loser. She looks like she has a mustache and she doesn't use common sense. She's really ugly, annoying, and hangs out with complete losers.
One of my friends dumped me last year because of popularity and I wasn't popular, I'm not popular, I probably never will be, but I will be considered a 'cool geek'.
Okay here is why I don't want to be her friend:
~She has a mustache and wears boots every day, not cute boots but horse riding boots or what looks like those kinds of boots.
~She has a mustache
~She went out with a complete loser
~She doesn't use common sense
~Is friends with other losers, one of which looks like a hippy
~She calls me her 'gym buddy'
~SHE WATCHES SOAP OPERAS(and in seventh grade)
~She doesn't have a facebook, cell phone, or email.
So how do I dump her without hurting her feelings? I've been kind of ignoring her lately. . .why should I do?!! Also all of he losers I mentioned are losers according to everyone except heir 'friends'. Oh and we are in seventh grade 13 years old she is 12 though. (link)
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Haha wow. Your an immature child. In 5 years your going to realize who is your real friends and who isn't. Treating someone like how you are saying you want to is so wrong it actually makes me sick. If you don't want to be fronds with someone straight up tell them. Don't be a wuss about it. I hope one day you realize how horrible this question is.
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so what i want to know is what to do about my boyfriend cheating on me with 2 bff's.i am still dating him and he does not know that i know he is a nasty cheater. me and my 2 bff's are making a list to get back at him. so what i am saying what do you think i sould do? (link)
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I'm sorry to hear your bf did this, but take a step back and think...not only did he cheat on you, but your "bff's" were part of it. They must have known you were dating and that it would hurt you so why would they do it? Sounds to me like you need to dump your man and your so called "best-friends".
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I use to have a bestfriend we got really close cause of soccer and we have been unseperable since. Well My senior year i met this guy (which is my boyfriend now) he was already in a relationship with someone while we started talking, we both liked each other but he couldnt breakup with his girlfriend. My Best friend thought it was a bad idea and on soccer tournaments her and one of my other good friends would say rude things while i was on the phone with him, and they would constantly talk about him rude to me. We eventually got together and of course we went to lunch everyday together and my best friend didnt like that. As our relationship grew i would hardly talk to my friends about him or be around them as much, well during these 4 and a 1/2 months we've broken up 4 or 5xs and the 4th time i went to my friends for comfort but they hardly said or did anything to make me feel better.. I cried alot well he asked me for another chance and of course i said yes because i really do love him. I didnt tell my friends we got back together, the next day at school we were together and my best friend saw us and she yelled that i was stupid we got into a huggee argument and she said i only talk to them when we break up and he treats me like crap and he cheats on me etc, i was tired of hearing it so we both decided to not be friends anymore, later on i found out my "bestfriend" was talking to my boyfriends ex-which i dont like cause we fought. I havent tlked to my"bestfriend" since its been a few months if that. I neeedd adviceeee! Was she even really a friend? Did i just over react?? (link)
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To answer your question, yes you over reacted. Friends are always supposed to come first. Because friends will be there for you. You pushed your friends away, by dating a guy who is obviously a jerk. They wouldn't dislike him if he wasn't. And it seems like you do only talk to her when he breaks up with you.
If I were her i wouldn't try to console you either. You need to make a decision, is this guy who cheats on you worth it? Or is someone who you've been close to for a long time worth it?
Only you can decide that.
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okay im 15/f and i think i love this boy but hes turning 13 and im fixing to be 16 im not sure how to handle the age difference and all. how do i know if hes to young and/or if i love him? (link)
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First things first, Love is something you know. Its something you feel inside of you. You don't THINK your in love, you know your in love. Secondly, i wish i could say that age doesn't matter like everyone else on this site, but unfortunately it does. You can go ahead and get in a relationship with this boy, but you have to take into account what his family is going to think, and what your family is going to think. Is it worth all of the drama? Your about to be 16 years old. Your probably in your 10th or 11th year of high school soon. Wouldn't you want to date someone you can take with you to the dances and go see movies with and everything? Like i said, if you like him, go ahead and try it. But hes going to be MUCH more immature than you are in the long run!
Good luck!
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Over the past six years or so, I've lived as a recluse. I have virtually no human contact other than what is required. In an average day, I probably say about 100 words aloud. I had a small group of 3-6 "friends" in elementary school, but I very rarely did anything outside of school with them.
Unlike most people with this problem, mine is entirely self-inflicted. I was never bullied, and I've had no "bad relationships" of any kind. I simply do not enjoy multi-person activities (including conversation). Since I viewed friendship as useless in the past, I didn't pursue it, and I am now completely incapable of participating in any kind of social interaction due to lack of experience.
Recently, over the past 2-3 years, this state has increasingly been bothering me for the following reasons:
* Having no social network of any kind puts me at an enormous disadvantage in gathering and spreading information.
* I have not a single person I can really trust with anything.
* Not having any human contact makes me depressed/lonely from time to time. Even though I don't consciously *want* human contact, I clearly need it in order to fix this.
So I eventually want to have like five friends (preferably online) who I can trust. It's no good just to have five contacts sitting in my instant messaging program; I need actual friends with whom I have real understanding.
How do I do this? Keep in mind that I have less social understanding than the average 3-year-old, and I am completely useless in a conversation. I also don't particularly enjoy conversation.
Don't tell me to "go out and talk to people". That's what all the websites say, and it does me exactly no good because I don't know the first thing about having a conversation. In all cases that I've tried to randomly participate in a conversation (_many_ times, online and off), I say virtually nothing because everything moves too fast for me and I can't think of anything to say.
I've posted this stuff to one other site, and despite talking to several of the people there, nothing good came of it. I will therefore be reluctant to contact anyone offering to "be my friend" in their response.
(18/m) (link)
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www.conqueronline.com This is a website for an internet game i Play. Its an online RPG and its alot of fun! The style is kind of old school, but you dont talk verbally to anyone. Its all about leveling up, and killing each other (haha). Ive been playing for about...Id say 8 years now, and i've made alot of friends on it. Not to mention that it definitely brought me out of my shell as a shy and quiet person. Though I wasnt to the point you are obviously.
Im not saying you have to play THAT game, but any internet game will do the same thing. Its something that is a common ground that you can relate easily to other people about, and talk about.
Its a bit hard to begin with to make friends, because most people are very strong all ready, but if you work hard you should have friends in no time.
I also play perfect world international. And if your willing to spend the money WoW is always a good choice.
But the first two games i mentioned are free so that's why I play them.
Good luck!!! Hope to see you on the game. If you feel like talking im on the server Celebrities, then Hebby, and my characters name is Lillum.
GOOD LUCK :D
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So tomorrow is my last day of senior classes (high school) and all of the sudden, I'm having problems with my best friend, Holly. Holly is by no means a perfect person by I have some of the best times in the world with her. She's like a sister to me we share all of our secrets and as a friend, I just love having her. There is a sense of friendship we have. She has some faults though and sometimes she doesn't treat her friends with the respect they deserve. That's why her bf broke up with her. So here's the short version of the saga. In march, I got mad at Holly and somehow we stopped talking for about a month and a half. It was one of the most miserable times in my life. Whether or not it was for a good reason , I still felt awkward around our circle of friends and awkward around her and it killed me. We started being friends again a little while later and I was happier than I'd been in months. Everything has been fine until up until a few days ago. She's been acting like she's above me and saying rude, snide things, and just taking advantage of me. We got into a few big arguments. Is Holly wrong? probably. Is it not a healthy relationship? maybe. I just feel so horrible that everything was perfect until the last day of senior year. I'm angry at her in so many different ways that I'm not even going to get into because the point is, I feel like our friendship might be ending THE LAST TWO WEEKS OF SR. YEAR. The LAST thing I want is to be miserable at prom, grad, yr. book, etc. because I KNOW I will be if we're in a fight. Should be mad at her for her crankiness and snide remarks? Should I apologize for "causing a fight?" I am honestly so upset because this is the worst time for something like this to be happening. I want to stick it out until the very end of the year, or else I'll be truly miserable. Help please (link)
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Im really sorry to hear about you and your friends problems.
It could be that she is mad at you, and if you can think of any reasons why i would approach her about them and try to talk to her.
OR it could be that your ending highschool. Imagine going to college and loosing your best friend. Maybe thats what she is afraid will happen and shes just trying to distance herself so that in the end it will feel like a choice to her instead of an inevitable.
College changes everything. I know that friendships in highschool seem like they will last forever, but the sad truth is, most of them dont. Im not saying dont try to salvage your relationship with her.
But remember, if it doesnt work out...its not the end of the world. You have your whole future ahead of you, dont let one person bring you down!
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what would be good for a group of newly single best friends to go do. like i got out of a long relationship a few weeks ago and from then on every few days my friends dumped their guys, idk we realize how their asses. i love my friends with all my heart, so other than shopping and going out to eat or peoples houses what is there to do? half the group doesnt drink so we dont when were together. chicks before dicks :) anything to get us closer than we already are? all between 15 and 17/f (link)
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Bowling is always a GREAT bonding experience. You get to rent nasty shoes, and make it more exciting by bowling blind folded, or backwards. Etc etc.
Go see a movie as a group. Make it a chick flick, or see Alice in Wonderland, its supposed to be awesome!
Something my friends and i have alot of fun doing, is making dinner together as a group. Everyone brings over the ingredients for a different dish. And you all work together to make an awesome meal. After that you can set the table really pretty and have an awesome little dinner party together. Or take it all in front of the tv and make it a movie night.
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I have rewritten this over and over again, re-read and re-read trying to add in every bit of detail to make the story clear and try to answer any questions about whats going on. I know it's long, but please bear with me as I feel its important in knowing exactly how everything plays in.
Pretense:
I guess you can say my story begins as a typical relationship, but things really turn strange. It started two years ago, the summer before my senior year of high school. I met the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. She had a boyfriend that shes been dating for two years so I figured I didn't have a chance in hell. She even thought I was annoying, but I persisted in trying to get close to her. One day she broke up with her boyfriend, and there I was. Really out of nowhere we started to date, and I was in love. Things moved pretty fast, constant texting, hanging around each other all the time and calling each other every night. After about a month or so though, she ended it with me and she got back together with her ex. I felt sick to my stomach.
Lucky for me her bf is crazy possessive, and eventually pushed her away again. I love her so much I took her back. For about a year we grew together and became best friends. However as our love grew, so did my jealousy and insecurity, and my fear of losing her. We were dating, everyone knew it, we did everything too had the most amazing sex, but we never had a title. And that was one thing I always fought about, her argument was we were already together so what was the point, just a name? I loved her too much to continue to argue, so I was okay with it. During our relationship she was still talking to her ex, never hooked up with him or anything, but always remained in contact. One day she left her phone unattended, and I saw his number and saved it to my phone. I didn't know exactly what I was thinking or what I would do with this number, but it would later prove to be my waterloo in the fight for her heart.
College: Early September, everything goes wrong. We both got accepted to ucf. Over the summer before we moved up she said she wants more space, and wanted to be alone during college. I was worried at first because I wouldn't be living on campus, but she would. And so would her ex, right near her. She was still close to me though and was always around, so my fears slowly slipped away. But then we moved in. I got a run down apartment off campus, it smelled like mold and had roaches galore. I was broke, home sick, and miserable. I grew desperate, and wanted to cling more to the only person I knew up in college with me. She however, was hanging out with her good friend/roomate at the time, and some big black kid that lived on her floor. He had helped her moved in and they were hanging out a lot. I wanted to hang out with her but she insisted she needed her space. Days went by and I didn't see her. My classes were all online, and I was in my room by myself all day. My thoughts and dreams haunted me. I had to call her. I kept calling her, and each time she never answered. She was out hanging out with her new friends, while I was home alone missing her, driving myself crazy. I dunno why I did, but I took her exes number and called him. I asked him for advice? I dunno why, it was the stupidest thing I've ever done. It only made me seem more crazy, and shocked her how I got his number. I told her, and she just couldnt trust me anymore. So here's where the strange part comes in. Long story short, her mom eventually called me and asked that I stop bothering her. At that point I realized how alone I really was when the girl I cared for most asked her mom to tell me to leave her alone. I told my buddy who went to a different school about what was going on, and like a "great" friend decided to play a joke on me. He had our other friend text me and say to leave her alone, shes texting me saying your harrassing her. I freaked. Of course this was untrue, but I panicked nonetheless. So I called her mom back and promised her I would leave her daughter alone if she could please tell her daughter to stop telling my friends Im a stalker. I realized I had been acting really irrational, and wanted to put an end to the madness before things got out of hand. But unsuspectadley...things did go out of hand, in the worst way possible.
The police involvement: That same day after speaking with her mother, I went to a restaurant on campus with an old high school friend. I didn't hang out with them much, but I figure since Im on my own now its best I start making new relationships. Well, remember that big black kid that was helping my "ex" move in? He appears at the restaurant with his buddy, and they approach my table. I have to add that I was online earlier on instant messenger and put where I was as my away message, which ill explain why its important later. So this kid storms up to my table ready to fight and says "why the F*** are you talking shit about me to *******'s mom??" I said to him "woah, are you crazy?? I don't even know who you are I didn't say anything about you I was talking about someone else" He said "bullshit i'll kick your ass" And I said "f*** you psycho" and as i turned away to ignore him and pick up my hamburger out of nowhere he decks me in the face. I was stunned. Everyone in the restaurant was watching at this point. I got up, but my friend that I was with insisted I call the cops. The black kid teased me and said "yea call the cops bitch!" and walked out. So I did, I called the cops. They come, ask what happened, and asked why this person I did not know hit me. I told him he was friends with my ex, and that they might have known I was at the restaurant because of my away message on the instant messenger. I give the report, and I go about my way. About 30 minutes later I get a phone call from the police asking me to go to the station, the story apparently is more complicated. So I arrive and from there on I quickly turn from the victim to the criminal. The police told me they had the kid who hit me in custody, but now I was in trouble. They had with them cell phone records and all the emails I had been sending my ex, and they were now ready to press harrassment charges against me. I was so shocked. They said they went to question her about why that kid came, and apparently she turned it around on me and wanted to file a harrassment complaint. By the end of the day, I was told that if I ever make contact with her or any of her friends or family I'd be arrested. My world fell apart and my heart sank to a low I couldn't describe.
September passes...the longest month of my life. I never really dreamt before, but everynight was a nightmare. I couldn't sleep.
October comes, I had already deleted her number and everything out of fear of being arrested, but I still had her as a buddy on aol instant messenger. I think we were both afraid to talk to eachother, because she began to communicate to me...through away messages. We begin by saying how sorry we are for everything. Long story short, after weeks of this weird communication, we agree to meet. It started with lunch, and before you know it I was sleeping over her dorm and we were having sex. No one knew we were seeing each other, it had to be secret. This part of my memory is quite fuzzy, because after that we began to fight again. And literally a week later she was dating that ex of hers. I was shocked. Apparently, during that month after the incident she found comfort in being with him. And apparently he was being an ass again and she decided to see me again. Seeing me only lasted a week, and then it was back to her not making any contact with me, and she was back with her ex.
October passes...as does November, December...January..all the way through April. Each day I fill my heart with more hate, my eyes with more tears, and my mouth with more alcohol. I tried to occupy myself, and get over this bitter situation. Just drop it I kept telling myself, its over, she screwed you over so hard. So I drank, and hung out with trashy people. I could tell myself I was having fun...but every night I put my head on that pillow, and my thoughts would haunt me. Everyday I missed her, wondered about what she was doing. I still loved her. I was miserable. I hated everybody and everything. Months went by and I never heard from her. I was nearly failing school. During a lot of this time I had been going to counseling. It helped somewhat, but the answers I was getting didn't seem to help. Everyday I grew more hateful, and more miserable. To say the least, I was not myself anymore and I turned into a completely different person. Anxiety attacks were constant, and I was in a constant state of panick. I really didn't know how I could ever survive. I hadn't had a good day for as long as I could remember. It was the worst I had ever felt, and was losing the will to live.
So sometime earlier this year we make contact again. I don't really remember how, but apparently she had been dating the same kid all year and had eventually broke up with him. She still didn't want to see me, but slowly but surely we started talking. The summer went on and we were like peas and carrots again. She moved back home for the summer while I remained in school. We talked all the time, and things were going great. This fall semester started and we were with each other 24/7, sleeping over each others houses. I was the happiest I had ever been.
My current dilemma: Last week, I made a huge mistake. She wanted me to help her with something on her computer, so while she showered, I worked on her computer. I finished early, and while I was sitting there I couldn't help but notice something. I don't know how I stumbled upon this document, but it was a conversation between her and her ex. I read it, then closed it. I made no mention of it. That night I slept over her place, and then later the next day while at work she texted me asking to be honest with her and asked had I gone through her computer. I panicked. I knew what was coming. I told her no. She said thats funny, under recently viewed documents something here was opened that I know I didnt open. So I told her. And then she cut me off. She said I'd never change, it was just like how I took his number out of her phone. I was really miserable, and my anxiety was driving me crazier than ever. How could I fuck up what I tried so hard to fix?? Our relationship was already so fragile because of our past. A couple days later she starts talking to me again. We take it slow, no more sleeping over of course. We go to the gym, and she even comes over to my house for dinner. I had to go home this past weekend to get my car ( I had none for the past month ) so she drove me to the bus station. I talked to her online that night while I was home, and then said goodnight. The next day we were talking and I made mention of how tired I was. And she said what time did you go to bed last night? I said right after you did. I wasn't really thinking about exactly what happened because I was wrong. She said I was full of shit because she went on later on and saw I was online. I was still online for a bit longer but didnt really remember. To me this was no big deal, but she called me a compulsive liar. She ignores me again. The next day I'm on the phone with her and talk about plans of going to disney world, I had already gotten tickets. She said thats not a good idea. And I kinda freaked and said why not?? We had been planning this for a long time. At this point she didnt even want to speak to me and said ill talk to you later and hung up. A couple hours later I texted her...no response. I texted twice more and still no response. The next day I made no attempt to contact her. Today comes...I drive back up to school, I text her. Still no response. I texted again and said I need my parking decal because it was in her car. She finally responded and said shed leave it at the front office of my apartment building. So she did. No conversation, she doesnt want to talk.
So this is me now. I find myself in desperation, looking for any sign that things will be alright. My anxiety is keeping me up all night and all I want is for her to know how sorry I am, and how much I regret going through her computer. I don't want her to not trust me. I care so much for her. If only she could know how sorry I am and how much I want to correct the wrongs I've made. I fear I may have lost her again and it will kill me if this happens again. I can't go on another year beating up on myself, being alone, being miserable. At this moment I am the most miserable I have ever been, more so before because I was given a chance at redemption, and I ruined it. I don't know what to do. I want her in my life so badly. I ask you out of desperation for help, I never meant to hurt her. What do I do?
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This doesnt sound like love, it sounds like an obsession.
You need to move on from this girl, its good that your already seeing counseling, but maybe you should go more often?
This girl has used you, hurt you in so many ways, why would you continue to waste your time with her? She is making a fool of you, getting you in trouble with the police, having her friends go after you her family?
I suggest you see a counsler, if you cant sleep try sleeping meds once or twice a week, i know they arent always a good idea, but it seems to me like you might need them just to get some decent rest.
Delete her number, delete her IM, and let her go on with her messed up relationship with her on and off again crazy boyfriend.
Im sorry that she has hurt you and used you this way, and im sorry that you cant move on, but you need to, or you'll never be a happier person.
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