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However lately I've had a lot on my mind.. For one my dad's health is getting worse everyday and there's no hope of him getting better because everything is a big joke to him... He just found out he had diabetes. My sis has cancer and 5 babies... My mom is as stressed as I am and she works 50-60 hours a week so she's not really here for me to talk to about stuff. I'm in college and I work part time and that's my only outlet.. I don't have tons of friends, but I'm just in over my head... Help, I need somebody.. HELP, not just anybody!! (link)
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Listen, everyone in your family is stressed out. Which is very unhealthy. And you need than just college and working as an outlet.
You don't need friends, (well not right now of course). You just need a good listening ear, or someone to communicate with when feelings gets to crucial.
I'm letting you know that I am here if you need someone to give advice. You can contact me via email if necessary. Or instant messenger.
-Cinnamon B-
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ok so i came back from a school field trip yesterday and when we got there she started being a little rude to me. As the day went on she got worse. When we got back to school she was completely ignoring me. Then today I came to school with a majpr sunburn from yesterday. When i got to school she wouldnt stop hitting it. I told her to stop many, many times but she would just ignore me and hurt me more. Later on today she was eavesdropping on me and my friend and i was saying how my sunburn on my left shoulder hurts really bed so she comes and hits me x3 harder. I snap on her and start crying but she continues hitting me. Can anybody give me any advice. She has been my best friend for almost 3 years now. Thanks by the way im 12 years old and a girl she is also 12 but 1 month younger. (link)
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Tell her in a firm projected voice, that she's not being much of a friend. She's being ANNOYING, and a PEST. Tell her, regardless of how long you tow have been friends, it doesn't give her the right to act like a complete stranger.
If she continues getting out of line, the its time to give the friendship a time out, until she knows how to act.
Good Luck
-Cinnamon B-
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What do you do when someone doesn't like you and nothing you do can change that... especially when this person is your boyfriends mom. (link)
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They always say "he/she will come around". But then there is that other saying "he/she is stuck in their ways". When you're in a situation like that, when someone doesn't like you for any reason, you have to confront them. Find out, directly from them, their reasoning for not liking you. If there isn't a reason (which would most likely be stated) simply inform them, that Disliking you for no reason isn't disliking, its Hatred.
That is what I call a disgusting act of immaturity, especially when someone is beyond their childhood years. They need to re-evaluate themselves because there are internal problems going on within them.
Family (general) of spouses, aren't usually the ones who would agree with the relationship. It happens, and you would either have to deal with it, or just walk away.
In time, you would see if things were really meant to be, as things happen for reasons which we will Never know.
Good Luck!
Let me know how things go.
-Cinnamon B-
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17.F
In the last several months, I have discovered true happiness and am on a quest of self-improvement. I have come to realize that one of my best friends for years is one of, if not, the, most negative person I have ever met. I love and support her, but I have come to realize that I need new friends who are positive like me. I feel the need to associate myself with positive people.
There is one girl I know from school, but we are not friends necessarily. We had a couple classes together last year, and I realize that I really want to be friends with her and have her positive attitude rub off on me. I have two classes with her this upcoming year. We each have our own friend circles, but I really want to get to know her and I feel that she will be a really great friend to have in my life. I am pretty good at making friends, but does anyone have any advice for me? Maybe I can ask her to be my partner in those classes or sit near her. I don't want to come off as forward and obsessive, though.
Does anyone have any advice for this situation, or life advice for me? I appreciate all comments and criticisms. (link)
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Well, one of the hardest things in our lives, are to make a mutual connection with people, in general. Friendships can always be created, but in this case, your situation is more serious. You're not only looking for that connection, you're looking to build something that would be life term. Its terrible that you have surrounded yourself around the negatively energetic people, glad you realize its very unhealthy.
You have someone who you feel can potentially lead to something long living. Friendship that feels like the relation to sisters (of course everyone would want that). Seems like you would have to initiate either the meet or conversation. Start off with a random topic about the class that you share. Or maybe how the school year is going for you two. Trust me, there's nothing that can go wrong accept if she doesn't want to be friends (which is unlikely, but may occur).
You have a greater chance just getting to know her, not necessarily jumping straight into personal discussions. Stick to generalization, until the conversation drifts elsewhere. You'll be fine!
Good Luck!
Let me know how it turns out
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my best friend is liking this one guy; lets call himm steve. And lets call her Macy. (link)
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She could really be falling for this guy, and I as I see, you're being pushed aside every time like you don't exist. I know the feeling, she's not the only person I know that does that to people, best friends, and family too.
As soon as a guy that they are so interested in, is in their reach, they aren't going to let him go that easily. That's when they lose focus on their own life, and mixing up their priorities.
Try to catch her alone, so her mind isn't to much into "Steve". Express your feelings, make her understand that by revolving her life around "Steve" its putting a strain on your friendship. Make her understand, that you've always been there for her, long before this particular guy came along. If she doesn't get it, let her know you can't continue going through with this, and the best way to live your life, is to let her go.
It can be a temporary thing, sort of like a silent treatment in a friendship.
Then it leaves her with no choice but to make the right decision.
If she let's "Steve" go, you can encourage her, that she'll find someone that wont interfere with your friendship.
And if she doesn't let him go, then you know, that you would continue being pushed aside until you've had enough.
And yes, you might just be losing your best friend to a guy.
Hope everything goes well.
Good Luck!
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There was this girl who I was friends with for five years, & we were in a really big fight last year over stupid things & we didn't talk for four (maybe five?) months. The thing is, this afternoon, we talked for the first time in a long time & she apologized. She really has changed. The thing is, two of my ex-best friends told me that she tried to get them to drink, & their mom told my mom. SO, my mom already doesn't like the girl, PLUS now she thinks she drinks. I know it's not true, cause the girls who told me that turned out to be liars. My mom still doesn't like her & doesn't want me hanging out with her. Everytime I try to talk to my mom about the conversation I had with her & how she apologized, she just changes the subject. How can I convince her that she's changed, so I can actually hang out with her? (link)
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You 1st need to go back to the source. Those who started up that lie, are the ones that must fix it. Now, they made an innocent person look 100% guilty.
Confront them, let them know that it was wrong what they did, and let them imagine someone did the same to them. Let them know, that it can be done, from anyone who feels the need to start trouble.
Have them give your mom information on how that lie started, and they're reasons to why they did it.
Let your mom know that it was a lie, and tell her that you want to discuss this further. Most parents, leave to their last words, but everyone is privileged to their own voice. Find a way to get her to understand you and what you're intentions are.
Your feelings are on the line as well, because you can easily lose her as a friend, maybe even for good.
Push harder, make it a serious issue, if you want a chance to continue being her friend.
Hope everything goes well. Good Luck!
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15/f
[kind of long. but i really need help]
there's this girl that i'm friends with. we used to be best friends, but lately our relationship has been kind of strained. she's just been so out of control the past 2 weeks that i have no idea how to handle it. we were basically the same two weeks ago.
we're both 15 going on 16, and we had never been drunk, or done anything illegal, or had boyfriends, or h/u'd with anyone. well it started when she went to this persons sweet 16 and got drunk at an afterparty. at first i was like whatever. everyone gets drunk as a teen, no big deal. then last friday she told me she smoked cigarettes, something we swore to eachother we would never EVER do. i was in a different state this week visiting relatives and while i was gone she threw a wild house party and did weed and got completely drunk and h/u'd with 4 guys and got fingered. and she may have had sex but she doesn't even remember. I feel like she's changing too fast and there's nothing i can do about it. and even though i wasn't even in the same state as her when this party happened, i somehow feel responsible. like i let her down in a way. like i was the reason she started hanging out with these kind of people because i had been a bit too clingy and pushed her away and made her want to rebel against everyone. she doesn't understand that she can get in serious trouble for what she did, if anyone ever finds out. and the worst part is, i don't think she even feels bad about it. she'd wanted to get drunk and high and make out with guys so bad. she told me this. and it seems like she's kind of happy about it and i just don't know what to do to make her understand how worried i am about her and how dangerous this kind of behavior really is without sounding too motherly and like a loser.
any advice is appreciated. (link)
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The best way to start is letting her know that you care for her like a sister, since you don't want to seem motherly. Let her know that her actions can lead her somewhere she may never get out of, if she continues to pursue this type of behavior.
Give her examples on things that you can do together to keep her occupied and away from things like drugs, especially drugs...
Don't feel responsible for her actions, and don't beat yourself up because you wasn't there when that big event took place.
By you blaming yourself, it wouldn't make you seem any better than she, when you are. You're keeping your distance away from bad influence.
Never blame yourself and hold yourself responsible for anyone else. You're not controlling them, they have a mind and body of their own. She did what she did, and she did it because she wanted to.
But most importantly, let her know that even though she will be out there doing her own thing, you will still care and be there for her when she'll need you the most.
Letting her know that, would keep her mind grounded that at least someone still cares, because she might be going through that type of situation in her life.
Be there for her, and support her, like a true friend/sister you are, she needs you. Let her confide in you, and everything will fall into place.
Good Luck!
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In life, I like to be polite to everyone. This has become a problem because whenever I hang out with my guy friends. At least one of them starts to like me and think that I like them back. I really try not to act flirty but its getting to the point where I'm losing my guy friends after having to turn them down. Its really bothering me, I miss just being friends with them. What do I do? (link)
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Come striaght out and announce it to them that you're looking for a great friendship with them, and to not take your niceness too seriously.
That way, they would know if they're flirting, and you're being nice, that's just your personality.
I'm sure they'll understand.
Good luck on your friendships!
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