I currently work for Nemours Children's Clinic and I work part time for Baptist Medical Center. I have an amazing boyfriend, we have been together for about a year and a half and have a nice place together. I love animals. I am majoring in psychology and love giving advice to people!
Gender: Female
Location: Florida
Occupation: Student/ Baptist Medical Center/ Nemours Children's Clinic
Age: 23
Member Since: August 20, 2006
Answers: 86
Last Update: April 27, 2009
Visitors: 8972
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I'm 17 (female), My boyfriend is 18. The problem i'm having is things are starting to get boring and our love is falling apart. We don't fight, but it gets boring and I feel that our love is weakening. He's lived with me for the last 5 months because his mom had to move and...long story lol. But he'll be living with me here till I turn 18 then we're getting a place together. We have internet at the house again and ever since we got it back, he plays games, I get on myspace and yahoo and talk to people and that's how the day goes, then we go up to my room and go to sleep. I don't know if it's that we need time apart, or time together. We still laugh and have fun when we're together, but we barely go places together, when he wants to walk, i'm tired of sick and when i wanna walk, he's tired or sick. What can we do to make things right again? (link)
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Do you spend time away from one another? It sounds like you don't have anything to talk about because you spend all your time together, or in the same house. Try going out with your friends every once in a while and doing things with your boyfriend that requires you to leave the house. You could have a date night every week where the both of you spend quality time together. I think you guys just need something else going on in your lives so you have something to talk about and share with one another. I hope this helps.
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UM Hi ME ND MY BF WERE TOGETHER LAST NiTE ND HE GAVE ME A HiCKEY i GO TO MY MOMS HOUSE ON SSUNDAY (TODAY iS SAT) BUT i RELE NEED TO KNOW WHT TO DO TO GET RID OF THEM FAST ND i MEAN LiKE RELE FAST!! PLZ ND THNK YU (link)
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I did some research online and apparently there isn't a way to get rid of them. You could try to cover it up with makeup. Hopefully it will go away before you have to go to your moms house. I copy and pasted what I found, so hopefully this will help you out some. Next time tell your boyfriend to be more careful! I hope this helps and good luck!
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I will be 14 in 4days! Right now i am in 8th grade. I've had a boyfriend once, in 7th grade. He was in 8th grade (not the cutest guy, but he made me laugh) He asked me out on AIM during thanksgiving break. I said yes. I told my sister and shes like "you scored an 8th grader", and im like yes. My sister is now a freshman in college. So i dont talk to her that much. About this age is when i think is good to have a boyfriend, but i can't figure out the best way to tell my mom if i get one. I never told my mom about the other guy last year, because he was an 8th grader and it didnt last long. He moved wayy to fast so i broke up with him after a week. I am not officially allowed to go on a 1 on 1 date till im 16. but i can still have a boyfriend, and he can come to my house and i can go to his. The big question im trying to ask, is how i should tell my mom when i have a boyfriend. Im nervous for when that time comes. Please help me! (link)
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Happy Birthday! lol Just be honest with your mom. She knows that you're at the age where you're interested in guys. If you're honest with her now and you talk to her about things then when it comes time to go on one-on-one dates, she will trust you because you've been honest with her. If there's a guy at school you like, just let her know that you think he's cute, or funny, etc. Talk to her about your friends and let her know you're staying out of trouble. If you're serious enough about a guy to want him to come over etc., then just be like "theres this guy at school that I like, would it be ok if he came over for dinner, or to just hang out one day?". I'm sure your mom would be thrilled that you're talking to her about it and letting her meet him. Just be prepared to get the birds and the bees talk if you start to get too close to him. lol I hope this helped, and feel free to ask if you have more questions.
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I met a girl about year ago who I really liked, but she had a boyfriend and a 6 month old baby. The boyfriend is no more but she still lives with him (for at least the next month). We became friends and have always flirted a lot. We've spent some time together but I couldn't ever get further than that. We've talked about my feelings for her and have a pretty open dialog about it. She says she doesn't want a relationship.
Two weeks ago, she got drunk and sent me an email telling me all the dirty things she wanted me to do to her. The next day she said she was embarrassed and wanted to pretend it didn't happen. Last week, she sent me a txt and wanted to meet up for a drink. We had a few drinks and as I was walking her to her car, she pulled me into a back room and we had sex. Afterward, we talked for a bit and she said it couldn't happen again until she moved out. Fair enough. She sent me a message later telling me she's wanted that since she met me. I asked her if things had changed about wanting a relationship and she said no. We talked about our friendship and eventually she started talking about being jealous of me talking with other girls (she's a bartender at a place I frequent) and
We hung out again the next night and as I was kissing her goodnight, she wanted to have sex again, but I told her I realized that was the kind of relationship she wanted and I was ok with that, but I really wanted more than that from her, so I asked her to slow things down a little so I could make sure I didn't ask her for more than she could give me. She kept on pushing me but I kept on resisting because I really think we'd be good for and with each other. She started getting upset because "I didn't want her" and I was "rejecting" her. We chatted later in the night and she was really upset. I told her that I wasn't rejecting her, but I had to make sure that my feelings for her were in control otherwise both of us were going to get hurt.
I want to pursue a relationship with her. We're already great as friends (at least we were, if that hasn't been destroyed by this) but I don't know what to do next. Is a fling the best I can do? (link)
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I think you should get to know her and find out about her past relationships. She may be scared to get into a relationship because of her child or because of something that happened in a past relationship. Some girls don't know how to express them self and use sex as a method of trying to get the guy, which doesn't always work out. When you told her that you wanted to take things slower and that you wanted more from her, she may have freaked out because you may be the first guy to actually take a step back and discuss the relationship before you end up just having sex all the time. She may feel embarrassed and unwanted because of this. It sounds like she has had a few bad relationships in the past and doesn't know how to be treated by a guy. Call her and ask her if she'll go out to dinner with you. Buy her some flowers. Show her how she's supposed to be treated. Another approach that may work (if she's the kind of girl who stays in bad relationships) would be to just ignore her for a while. If you back off, she may realize that she actually likes you. Either way, it's your call. I hope I helped. Let me know how it goes, or if you have any other questions.
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hey, im not on my computer right now so i dont wanna mess with the whole emailing thing so i will just write you on here. i can write him letters and stuff and i tell him all the time how much i care about him so he knows i do and that i love him soo much. he says when he gets out of there that there will be no more trouble. (he is in there for probation violation) but i heard from 2 of his friends that some kid is saying that the 3 of them jumped the kid and that now he is gonna be in more trouble and im soo scared that he is gonna be gone again and that while hes out there some chick in canton is gonna get him to cheat on me and it hurts so bad to think about but i cant stop. i dont know what to do about anything. i wanna trust him soo bad but im scared that if i trust him and he does hurt me then its gonna hurt 50 kabillion times worse. and im also scared that if i dont trust him hes gonna get mad that i dont and possibly leave me. i mean hes never shown any anger torwards me and the 18th will be our 16 months but hes been gone for 3 of them.. and it really hurts. his mom likes me too and i just talked to her earlier and she said shes gonna find out for me this tuesday. im excited but im trying not to get my hopes up. and i dont know what im gonna do if i cant see him. i think ill go crazy! i write him all the time but i keep losing the letters i write. i sent him 4 letters at once this time. and in one of them i went off on him.. i felt really bad for sending it but he really needed to know how bad it hurt me that he broke his probation thinger knowing full well what would happen and that he would be away and then when i heard he cheated all he did was deny it... he didnt comfort me at all and be like "babygirl i would never do that to you. i love you too much." or anything like that. he was just like "nah its not true" grrr guys annoy me. im kinda scared to hang out with my friends because apparently most my guy friends like me because they keep trying to get me to leave him or to cheat and they dont realize im not gonna do that to him. it really annoys me at times. but if i hang out with alora and brittany im fine and if i hang out with kara im fine.. but anyone else its like eh.. go away. im sorry that this is really long and a lot to read but i have a lot to get out of my system and i dont really talk to many people about this because im scared they will tell people. ive only got 2 people i trust with this and thats alora and kara.. well, now you as well. thank you sooooo much for helping me. you give really good advice and id love to keep talking to you about it if your up for it. well, write me back k? buh bye.
*~Carrie~* (link)
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Is he in an all boys facility? If he is, then he will not be able to have any contact with girls. I didn't have to worry about that with my boyfriend because there weren't any girls around him where he was. How do his friends know that he jumped someone? If they can find stuff like this out, why can't you? It's good that his mom likes you. If you can, just keep talking to her and let her know how much you care about him. As for you losing his letters, get a spiral notebook with preferated edges so you can keep track of his letters, and when you want to send them, just rip them out. Does his mom get to see him or talk to him yet? My boyfriend didn't get visitation rights until he had been there for over two weeks. They had to earn them. Just so you know, they more than likely read all of the letters you send him before he gets them, so try not to say too many things in them you wouldn't want others to read. Also, if you do get to visit him, they search you with metal detectors and pat you down before you go in the room. Do you know what level facility he is in? I think a level 4 is the lowest, and it goes up to 10 or 12, i think. That will also let you know if you'll be able to talk to him. What was he on probation for? And how did he violate it? When you hang out with your friends, only hang out with your girl friends, because I had the same problem. I hung out with my boyfriend's best friend and he ended up making a move on me (I thought that I could trust him since he was best friends with my boyfriend all of his life). Needless to say, they aren't friends anymore. Why don't you trust him? Has he given you any reasons not to? Also, how old are the two of you? His age will give me a little insight as to what will/ can happen if he messes up in their again. I hope I can help you out. Feel free to write me anytime to ask questions or just to talk etc. Keep you head up!
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so last week my boyfriend went to a group home in canton and he isnt getting out till the begining of next year. i promised him on our love that id be here waiting for him when he got out. sometimes its soo hard. i dont know what to do that will keep my mind off him so that i can last through this. because i really really wanna stay with him but it hurts. i had a dream last night that he called me and talked to me... and when i woke up i wanted to go back to sleep because i knew that we still havnt found out if he can call me or if i can come see him or anything. i dont know. im confused. im trying to get my friend to ask his p.o (because they have the same one) if i can have his number so i can call and ask him if i can go visit or call my boyfriend. any tips on how to convince him to let me?? (link)
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I went through the same thing you're going through with my boyfriend. He was away for 6 months and we're still together (that happened over a year and a half ago). I was so worried and didn't know what to expect. His mom really liked me and felt I was a good influence on him, so she had a talk with his p.o. and eventually we were allowed to write each other letters (he could write me once a week, and call me once a week for 10 minutes). I could write him as much as I wanted but I couldn't call him. I'm sure it's different for every place, though. The best suggestion I can give you is to write him whenever you want to talk to him. I kept a big book of all the letters I wrote to my bf and gave them to him once he was allowed to get them. It made him feel really good to know that I cared that much. I wrote him a letter every single day he was away. The first month or two will be the hardest, but it doesn't get easier. The best thing I can tell you to do is to hang out with your friends to get your mind off of everything. I know it's so hard, but you can get through it. If you are on good terms with your bf's parents/guardian then they are probably the only ones that can convence his p.o. to let him have any sort of contact with you. He is probably going through a tough time right now, being away from everyone he knows. When he is allowed to have contact with you, make sure you let him know how much you care about him and that you're there for him. He probably really needs the support right now. Do you know what kind of place he's in? Also, what did he do to get in there? How old is he/ you? I can give you lots of details on what is going to happen if you want to e-mail me this info or talk to me about it online (XBrooklynHeights@aol.com s/n XBrooklynHeights). They are going to evaluate him based on what he did to get in their and give him counseling for it. If he stays on good terms with them and doesn't get in any trouble, they may release him early (unless he has to stay in there a minimun of so many months). He more than likely will have to go to school while he's there and he'll have an opportunity to get his G.E.D. (depending on his age etc.). Please feel free to write me an e-mail if you want to know anything else, or if you just want to talk. I wish you the best of luck and I hope this helps.
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Im sorry this will be long, but please bear with me. I started talking to this guy a few months back, and we really hit it off. Problem was, he was hiding the fact that he has a girlfriend. Me and his girlfriend talked, and we were friendly with each other, but one day she said "I dont want you two to talk, I think youre getting too close" and she was right..we said we loved each other every time we talked, and we hung out a lot. We never kissed, but we held hands, and just did all the cutesy stuff. Things happened, and me and this guy stopped talking for a few days because we were fighting. Neither of us could stand it, we missed each other, so we started hanging out again. We eventually hooked up, and through a bit of trickery by his girlfriend, she found out. We fought but then things were okay but things keep getting mixed up and we keep fighting. I know I shouldnt talk to him anymore even thought I love him and I know he loves me. I need a way to get over him because I cant hurt his girlfriend like this anymore even though she has made me feel lower than dirt. I somewhat deserve it but I couldnt help kissing him back when he made a move. How can I forget about him when I still love him? (link)
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You need to get over this guy. It sounds like he is just using you. I know you love him and he says he loves you, but if he really did, he would break up with his girl friend and be with you, right? You are worth so much more. You need to be with a guy who doesn't put you in this position. I was in your exact position one time. I dated this guy and we broke up. Then we started talking again and got really close. He never told me that he had a girlfriend, and once I found out, I was too involved with him and still continued to hang out with him. He stayed with his girlfriend for several months until FINALLY I got him to break up with her and be with me. Once he did this, he still continued to see her behind my back and this lasted for over a year. I broke up with him once I found out because all he ever did was lie and cheat. Our entire relationship was a lie. He continued to do the same thing to her with other girls for several years after that, until she finally had enough and broke up with him. Whenever you think about hanging out with him, just remember how he's hurting you. He's only going to break your heart and you need to move on before it gets worse. Hang out with your friends more and get to know other guys. They aren't all like that. I'm really sorry he's doing this to you. I hope this helped. Good luck!
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I'm 17 almost 18 and I fell in love with the perfect guy we've been dating a couple months now and his family loves me and my family loves him. We have both hinted at marriage and we both are going in the same direction. He's 21 and I met him through friends. But i'm scared that I'm going to get my heart broken. He's the first guy thats ever been nice to me in a relationship and didnt expect things from me. I guess I'm just confused on how to take all this in. We both act almost as if we are almost ready, but I'm getting impatent waiting for him to pop the question. What can I do to hint that i think we should take the next step or should I wait for him to do it?
love,
~Christina~ (link)
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It is so great that you found someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. I'd suggest that you wait it out and let him ask you. You can ask questions like "how many kids do you want" and make comments like that to him that suggest you're thinking about more. However, keep getting to know each other and in time, when it's right, he'll ask you. You have your whole life ahead of you to get married. Enjoy dating for a while and all the things that dating brings. And I suggest that before you actually get married that you do pre-marrital counseling to discuss different things about the two of you (different parenting styles, raising kids, how many you want, money issues, religion, carrers etc.) Just be there for each other and motivate one another in your careers/ school. Save up for your own place and such (I assume you still live with your parents) and get ready for the long road ahead! I hope this helped and good luck!
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For the past 2 years I have gotten really close with this guy who is A LOT older than me. He's 36 and Im 14/f But latley we've gotten really close. Like were dating? I don't know. its not like he's a pervert or anything. But I've i guess fallen in love with me. We're both musicians and we share an amazing passion together. I can stop it whenever I want to , but i can't. I guess you can't help who you fall in love with. The thing is that no one knows about it and hes married! So im really confused. but if i tell my mom or anyone there goes my lessons with him and band and everything ive worked for. and i love him. what should i do and is this okay that were together? (link)
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Please, go talk to your mom right now about it. She won't be mad at you or think anything less about you, but this is wrong on his part. I know you feel like you have a connection with him, but this is what pedophiles do to manipulate young girls. Just trust me on this. You have to tell someone about this and stop it before anything else happens. He has to be reported. Him being married, which is the least of your worries, is very wrong. I don't know how else I can stress this to you. Please contact me asap (e-mail XBrooklynHeights@aol.com, s/n XBrooklynHeights) so I can help you. This is so important.
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ok im 15 years old and i am having signs of being pregnant and me and mi bf never use condoms i know that doesnt help well like i've been getting lightheaded alot, tired quickly, breasts are tender, ankels are swolen, stomach hurts if u push on it, hungry... and like mi bf always pulls out and everything and ic ant tell by mi periods because its hereditary for me because wen mi mom and g-ma was pregnant they still had there periods and i know its rare but its hereditary for me too so i cant tell by that please help me! (link)
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I'd suggest to get a pregnancy test to make sure. You can get one at any drug store. They cost between $10- $20, depending on what kind you buy, but make sure you read the directions very carefully so you do it correctly to get an accurate reading. The symptoms you had are signs of pregnancy, but could also (slight chance) be cause by other things. Another major symptom is morning sickness and cravings. If you don't want to tell your parents just yet and you can get a ride some other way, just to make sure, you can go to Planned Parenthood (get the address and the phone number out of the phone book to see where the closets one is to your area). You can just call them and set up an appointment (you may be able to just do a walk-in). They will give you a free pregnancy test and go over the results with you. If it is positive and you are pregnant, they can help you get set up with an insurance company (if you dont have insurance already). Also, they will give you free vitamins to take for the baby. Another option is adoption if you do not want to keep the baby. And if you choose, abortion is a third option. I would suggest talking to your mom about it if you have a relationship with her where you can. I know some girls don't and become scared and end up getting an abortion. I hope everything works out for you. Feel free to contact me if you have anymore questions!
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Ok well I've liked this boy for lets say 5 years now pretty pathetic i know well anyway there is no one to ask him for me telling him is deffinatly out of the question because the problem is hes my best friend! so what to do i feel empty every day that i dont tell him a little bit of me dies i just want to know should i never tell him move on wait longer date someone else see how i feel i dont know i need help please! Ive turned down lots of great guys just because i like my best friend so blease HELP ME!! Thanks alot for those who answer
confused chick (link)
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If your feelings about this guy are that strong, maybe you could drop hints to see how he feels. Flirt with him a little or see if he wants to hang out with you. Besides, if he finds out you like him, whats the worst that could happen. And, if you don't ever tell him you'll regret it later. There is also a possibility that he likes you too and is scared to tell YOU! What if that happened and you guys went your whole lives never knowing how the other felt? Just let him know that you really care about him somehow and that you think about him a lot. I know you said that was out of the question, but it's worth a try. Maybe you could write him a note and tell him that you think you may have a crush on him. Maybe not let him know that you've been totally in love with him for the past 5 years, but that lately you might have become somewhat interested in him and see what he says about it.
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Ok...there's this guy i like, but im not the type of girl who can just walk up to somebody and start a conversation and ask them out. I want him to do it. Is there anything i can do to maybe get him to notice me more?? (link)
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Find reasons to be around him more. Become friends with his friends or maybe you could see if a group of friends wants to go to the movies or bowling and ask him along (and if you can't do it, get a friend to!). Throw a party and invite him. If you could find it in yourself to talk to him, maybe you could start a conversation about a class you are taking together (assuming you are in the same class or even go to school together). If not, maybe you could talk about a mutual friend (nothing bad, of course). See what kind of music he listens to and try to talk to him about that. Or, if that fails, you could write him a note. I hope I helped a little. Good luck.
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Hi,
I’m going to try to make this brief since I know you don’t have time to
be going through pages of my problems. You see, I am love with this guy
DJ, I have been since I was in 6th grade, when we started off as being
friends. That eventually grew into being best friends, and before I
knew it, he liked me. But I didn’t see it because at that point I didn’t
know what it was like to be liked by a boy. When he liked me, I was
going through stages of struggling with makeup, getting my first period,
desperately trying to learn how to shape my eyebrows (which always ended
up being pencil thin), and trying to figure out where I belonged in my
social circle (at the time I was more in the “gangster” kind of
clique).
He was my first love, and no matter how hard I’ve tried, I could never
get him out of my head, nor my heart. I’ve liked other boys, but he had
always been in my heart, and there was not a time in my life that I was
definite that if he asked me out I would say no. He was (and still is)
a very handsome boy that all the girls swoon over. When I was in 6th
grade we were very close, until something happened at the end of the year
which caused us to part. In 7th grade, things were very wishy-washy,
meaning that we weren’t very good friends, although we didn’t exactly
hate each other. We talked every now and then if something bad happened
between one of our friends but nothing other than that. I felt things for
him on and off, and he remained in my heart, but I knew that the way
things were going, that it would be pointless to try to get us together.
I told him during the year that I liked him sometimes, but of course,
since we weren’t very good friends, he didn’t care very much. And there
were also times that I told him that I didn’t like him anymore which
was always a lie since he was always in my heart. A few days ago he
instant messaged me saying that he felt stupid for walking out on me, and
that he regretted it because he realized that I was a good friend. So we
are now best friends again, and I’d have to say that I’m pretty happy.
I want to tell him how much he means to me, that I dream about him at
night, and that I am overally just completely in love with him. The only
thing is that as I am in love with him, he is in love with this other
girl Casey, the one that he was going out with in 6th grade, when he
liked me, but he cared for her more so wouldn’t leave her for me. He had
told me that at the beginning of the school year that he would ask her
out again, which is coming on September 6th. I feel that my time is
running out, but since we have only just became being best friends again, I
don’t want to rush things, because I don’t want to mess things up and I
want us to have a relationship.
I need some serious help on what to do from here.
He means everything to me and I only wish that I meant the same to him
in his eyes.
Please help. I’d appreciate it so much you have no idea.
(link)
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Try to spend more time with him, either hanging out or talking on the phone or online. Maybe invite him to go to a movie and let him see what he's been missing out on. Spending more time with him will make you closer and hopefully make it easier for you to open up to him. You definately need to tell him how you feel though. If you don't, you will regret it later. He could be too shy to tell you how he feels. Just let him know that you've been thinking about him a lot and see how he responds. I hope it works out for the two of you!
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