Gender: Female
Location: Chicago, IL
Occupation: Sales/Online Consultant
Age: 24
Member Since: October 31, 2007
Answers: 45
Last Update: November 9, 2007
Visitors: 3991
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ok so i'm a 17 year old guy and my girlfriend is now almost 17 and we're in love and have been for about a month and a half (we've been together for about 4 months now). we've master the whole kissing thing so recently i asked her if i could get a blowjob in the near future and she said that she wouldn't mind giving one to me because i deserve it. i want to make her feel good too so i told her that i would return the favor and do something for her. she's never given a blowjob before but she has received oral sex. the thing is, i have no idea what to do, or what i'm looking for, or anything. i'm thinking that i'm going to finger her first and then go in with the tongue and stuff but that's really all i've got right now. i really need some help from both guys and girls. i love her so much and i really want to make her feel good so i don't want to mess this up badly. if i did horrible though, i know she would still love me but like i said, i want to make her feel good. so any help would be much appreciated. (link)
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Step 1: Find the clit.
Step 2: Swirl/suck/lick/flick/do whatever to it.
Step 3: Do an occasional lick of the whole area/stick tongue inside her...play off of her reactions to what you're doing to her.
Do a little trial and error, and again if she reacts more intensely to something you're doing, keep doing it. You have to figure out what she likes, because all girls are different.
Here is a map of where the clit is:
http://www.infosex.com/pics/clit.jpg
Good luck, my friend.
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So, I got linked to this site and I'm basically on the last thread of my sanity, and thought, "Hey why not." The bottom line is I cheated on my girlfriend. There's more to the story i can spare, but nonetheless it was a terrible situation, where we weren't together, but turned into more of a blackmail when I got back with my girl, "If you don't sleep with me again I'll tell." After a few times of destroying my morals even more, I put an end to it, and sure enough, my girlfriend was told about what I had done thereafter. I have been with many chicks, had many heartbreaks, but this is one I can not leave behind. I have never been more sure about anything in my entire life, unlike a lot of people who ask advice on here. I have exhausted a lot of time and effort into trying to find resolution with us for months (and I know she's still in between on the idea of giving me another chance), and I would give anything in the world to obtain it. What should I do? A lot of things I read on here about cheaters are very close-minded, and leave no cushion for a human error, or even the possibility of an honest change. Please help?
(link)
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Well the first thing I will say is this: Take absolute responsibility for your actions. Do not reply to anything with "but we weren't together at first" or anything like that. The first step to making her realize that you are serious about moving on from this is the fact that you are willing to take total blame for fucking up. I don't know if you have done that thus far, but if you have, keep it up, if you haven't, own up.
Second, I am not sure as to what kind of interaction you have with her during this time, but try to keep it at a "friend" level. That way it doesn't seem like you are really pressing her to make a decision. If you still hang out, try to make it as casual as possible. It is a way for her to remember why she was with you in the first place, seeing you for the person you are again rather than the person who hurt her. Be yourself, it is the reason she was with you to begin with.
Third, she needs a reason to trust you. You are the only person who can really figure out what that reason is, as corny and cliche as that sounds. It has to be beyond "because I love you" or "it will never happen again" because anyone can say that stuff until they are blue in the face, but it doesn't matter unless they are able to see it in you. So work hard at regaining her trust, because if anything, this will be what determines both whether or not you have another chance and whether or not the relationship will withstand this type of incident down the road. Sometimes when a person cheats and is taken back, they find a way to put a bandaid on it and think it's fine. What can happen is the trust is never regained and the other person becomes extremely insecure about it and it can ruin the relationship.
I am not sure if this is what you were looking for, but that is my take on it. If you have other questions, I can try and answer those as well. But good luck and I hope things work out for you.
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I recently met a wonderful, mature guy in his forties (I'm in my thirties) and we spent a great night together and a long late breakfast the next afternoon in which we told each other quite a lot about our past relationships. I divorced four years ago after a marriage of seven years. This marriage was to my first boyfriend, my first sexual experience, and turned out to be somewhat abusive. I tried to get out of the marriage twice, first by simply telling him I wanted out. I stayed that time because I couldn't handle how much it seemed to hurt him to leave. The second time, I went off to an artists' colony for a month and actually cheated on him, the first time I'd ever done this before or after. I told him immediately and it was the end of our marriage. One of my friends thought the cheating was the only way my husband would have let me go.
So I told the new guy all of this. He had said something about my being mature enough to get out of the marriage or something that I thought wasn't quite right, wasn't quite honest if I agreed, so I told him of the cheating so he'd really know what happened and told him I suffered untold guilt about it for a long time.
Well now I'm wondering if I made a mistake, if my desire for honesty will simply scare him off instead. He took what I said very kindly, seemed to understand, but now I'm worried. Maybe it's just that I'm waiting for that call to see him again that's gotten me so worried. In any case, would you recommend this kind of honesty on my part in the future (on future dates, if this one doesn't work out)? Shouldn't I keep things open? Or am I just shooting myself in the foot.
Thanks,
handwringing (link)
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I think it was perfectly appropriate for the conversation you were having. It is great that you showed him you're able to be completely honest even at such an early point in the relationship. If anything, he'll see it as a sign that you're willing to be completely open about anything and that you aren't hiding anything about your past. I would be surprised if he is scared off by that. Since he is in his 40's, I doubt he is going to run off for petty reasons the same way a guy in his 20's would. You are probably worrying yourself over nothing.
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I've been dating my boyfriend for about 2 1/2 months. We've been doing great. We haven't had a big fight or anything and he's really sweet. We started dating at the end of the summer when I saw him every day. We go to different schools, though. After school started, I got a 10:00 curfew on the weekdays, a 12:00 curfew on the weekends, and only two days I'm able to take the car (I don't have one of my own, so I have restrictions on my parents' car). My mom has helped me out by giving me an extra day or a curfew extension here or there and she lets him come over and she takes him home so I can be with him without using one of my days. He only works on the weekends with his uncle and I've only been working on the weekends too. For the most part, we've gone a maximum of 2 or 3 days a week without seeing each other. We always find ways to be together.
I am getting my own car within the next day or so, so I no longer have restrictions with a car. However, I now have to pay for insurance and my own gas. Therefore, I got a better paying job where I'll be working Monday-Thursday evenings and Saturday mornings. He works Saturday mornings so it's not a problem. That means that I'll get Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights with him, and that's it. I still have the same curfew. Plus, he may have to get a job soon during the week, so we may be seeing each other even less. It will just be phone conversations for the majority of the week.
I'm about to turn 18 and I'm graduating high school this year. After I graduate, I'll be able to do more things. I can stay out a lot later, stay the night out of the house, and eventually get my own apartment while working and going to college. After school lets out, if my boyfriend and I are still together like I hope we will, it will be a lot easier for us to be together. It's just now that is going to be hard for us...at least until this school year ends in May. That means 7 months of only seeing each other 3 or 4 days a week. I'm scared to death that 2 1/2 months isn't long enough to withstand 7 months of working to see him.
I just wanted some thoughts on my situation. I'm extremely stressed out, because between school, work, graduation, college applications, etc. I won't see him nearly as much as I have been. Maybe this is a good thing? But maybe not. Any thoughts? (link)
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As you get older, your life gets busier. I don't talk to my boyfriend all week, not even by phone, and rarely we speak on the computer, and it's because we both work full time jobs. I just graduated college in May, so I had a little more free time, but now he started college after taking a few years break, so we basically see each other once a week and it works. You just really have to trust that you care for each other enough to not let your busy schedules come between you. Make the most of the time you do have together and try not to let little things like missing a phone call you both had planned or something like that. You don't want one your few times talking to be a fight. You really have to work at being flexible and understanding. If you're able to do that, you should be fine. After all, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
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I met this guy at my dads friends party. i liked him ever sense i saw him he was soo cute but i didnt REALLY like him till he was talking to my dads friends son and i saw his personality, a bit. then we started talking and i liked him RIGHT away. soon he had to leave but i asked for his number and he asked for mine. soo long story short whenever i talked to him from then it allways made me soo happy and in such a good mood he would waste his time talking to me. but you know i was allways cool about it i never called him to much or text him to much just like once in three days or whatevr cause i didnt want to get annoying. but i felt annoying when he didnt talk to me for a long while. so i decided to lay off about a week l8tr without talking to him i felt so bad i accualy screwed it up with this guy [i was THAT insucure]and accualy cried overnight. worst night ever over me not even talking to him! then i called him mad i thought i DONT deserve this! im gonna call him and figger out what the heck is going on cause he never calls me back, imagine that he didnt pick up. the next day though he texted me, and we talked and i was happy. the day after that i called and we talked. then stopped till i texted him a few days l8tr. now a few daays ago i talked to him and as allways i felt great talking to him, we talked about everything, and his friend was there too and he accualy flirted with me then . ALOT. he would tell me i was hott and whatnot and that he wanted to see me, stuff like that . i asked him why he hasnt returned my calls. his friend yelled out CAUSE HES LAZY! and he laughed on that. afew days later called again, you get the picture. i feel it keeps going over and over he have a GREAT time talking then he dissapears on me. he gets me all happy but know later i will get in a bad mood feeling i did somthing wrong cause he never returns texts. i dont know, is he just not into me or not much of a talker or what ? i like him soo much and think of him every day. he seems into me on the phone but after that nothing. but hey if he says hell call me that night in a few he will that must count for somthing. please advice !
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Chances are, he just really isn't into using his phone. I am the same way. Even though I can REALLY like a guy, if he calls or texts me, 90% of the time I never get back to them because I am just not a phone person. Next time you talk to him, see if you can get a screen name for an online messenger or maybe an email address if you haven't already got them. Since his friend called him out on being lazy about answering his phone, chances are he ignores his friends phone calls/tests just the same.
It seems like he likes you from the way you describe your interactions, so just try to play it cool and not overthink things when he doesn't return calls/texts. If there's one thing that people should learn it's to not "smother" someone they are interested in. If you call too much, he might get the impression that you're clingy. Big turn off if you're a boy or a girl.
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my boyfriend has been saying i love you for a couple of months now. i do say it online but not in person or over the phone yet. he understands i'm waiting for the right moment. [btw, i'm speaking from a 9 month relationship]
it's just i don't know what's wrong with me. i can feel it, but the words don't come out. i love you is like saying sorry. by the age 7 or 8, i never spoke of those words [to parents or friends]... maybe because i was embarrassed or i dont know. i want to say it but i'm afraid i'll freeze up. i'm naturally quiet, close to a mute anyway. so maybe it's the anxiety or the experience/reaction of his that's scaring me. i felt forced to say it [over the phone] in another relationship.. but this one.. i told them how i felt about it and i can wait comfortably. i think i'm strange.. it took me so long.. by the age 14.. i could finally apologize to friends.. and maybe around 16, i would go and say i love blahblah [a close friend]. but in a relationship.. it's.. a lot different. what's wrong with me? there has been times i've wanted to say it but.. it just won't come out. i freeze up and get shy. (link)
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I grew up the exact same way. In fact, my parents and I didn't start saying "I love you" until I moved away for college. It is normal, especially if you grew up in a household where it wasn't tossed around all the time. I had friends who said it to their parents everytime they left their house. It's not that they are any closer with their parents than I am, because I am actually pretty close with my own parents, it's just not something that needs to be said all the time. It can lose it's meaning if you toss it around too much. It almost means more when it is hard for a person to say and they finally say it. The guy seems really understanding and like a decent catch, so just continue on with what you're doing. He knows you love him, you just have a hard time expressing it. You will become more comfortable with time and it won't even be an issue anymore.
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i met this boy a couple months ago at a football game. hes been friends with some of my friends. (thats how we met) so we've been talking on the phone a lot and he told me he likes me but i want to get to know him first before i decide if i like him. ohh and he doesnt go to our school. his birthday is coming up and hes having a party at his house. he invited me and i want to go but he didnt really invite any of my friends and i dont know any of his friends. i want to go so i can hang out with him but i think i would feel realyl akward since i dont know anyone. should i go? ahh...i have soo many questions! what should i expect? (people says he makes his moves fast on girls) what should i wear???? and most of all...what should i get him?
thanks soo much in advance.
i rate high (link)
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Just ask him if it's alright if you bring a friend with you. I'm sure he will be fine with that.
Aside from that if people say he makes his move fast, make sure he actually likes and you like him before you "do" anything with him. If that is his reputation, there's a chance he's got his mind in a different place than yours. So becareful, and don't go unless you can bring a friend with you. You don't want to be a party where you don't know, or more importantly, don't know if you can trust anyone around you.
If you don't know the guy too well just yet, I would maybe get him maybe an iTunes gift card for 10 bucks or something. It's simple and it's something that anyone would like to get and you won't have to guess what kind of music he likes.
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20fcanada.
lately my love life has been a complete mess.
ive never been 'single and looking' before in my life... so now i find myself alone in a new city with very few friends and i was wondering if anyone had good ideas on ways to meet quality guys?
(i work at a lingerie shop, so i dont have the chance to meet guys at work, and im taking some sewing/fashion classes... again, no -straight-guys )
Thanks. xo (link)
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The last thing you want to do is try the bar scene. That is a dead end, right there.
Try going to libraries, cafes, museums, etc. It sounds corny, but you are likely to meet some decent people in places where people are sober and not expecting to prey on young, drunk girls. Anywhere in public with lots of people, really.
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16/m
I have this friend. Well, now we're more than friends because she asked me out today. and i said yes. I really really like this girl, but im afraid things are getting awkward between us, and because of it she'll break up with me. and this is only the first day...
Im not sure if maybe im just being paranoid or something, but the only way we knew each other was because we made fun of one another and joked around. now that we're more than just friends, I don't know what should change and what shouldn't.
the point is, i really like this girl, but i dont really know HOW to be her boyfriend. i dont want us to be ruined. and i dont want us to break up either... thats why this is confusing me.
anyway, here's my main question: is this just the type of thing we will get used to? or is this never going to work out between us? PLEASE help. (link)
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Be yourself. The more you act awkward around her, the more she will pick up on it and feel awkward her self. Just act the way you did before you became a "couple" and you will be fine. If your friendship was based on humor, then that is what she sees in you and likes about you, so continue on with the jokes and stuff of the like.
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Ok so I have a "friend" who lives like 8 hours away. We've been friends but i just recently moved and now we've been talking. We are like bf/gf but not actually. He and his chick friend[she has a bf] came to my place to visit so we could go to a theme park a few weeks ago and he slept with me and she slept on the couch. And we had sex[i'm 19and he's the second person i've ever had sex with..and i'm his 3rd]. They only stayed a day and then they had to go back home. I expected that we would finally be official but he told me that he was confused and he didn't know if it would work..he's also going into the army in like a month.And then the other day we talked and he still said that he really really likes me alot but he doesn't know how it will work. And so, but he still calls me baby and still acts like we are b/f and g/f but theoretically we are nothing so i'm soooo confused...HELP (link)
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He is stringing you along in order to be able to sleep with you until he goes into the army. Then once he is gone, he has an out to say "I'm far away, it won't work." and then he is able to wash his hands of it. I would say make a clean break from it before you become anymore emotionally attached than you already are. Guys will say and act in any way necessary to sleep with a girl. Like the other answer said, cynical...but for the most part, true.
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