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advice

i really like this guy and we're hanging out in a few days. he wants me to choose what we're gonna do but i have no idea what to do. does anyone know of some fun things/places to do/go? i need helpp :(

oh by the way im 16.

go karting...movies....laser tag...bowling...eating...

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so i like this guy and this guy likes me. we've been talking for a couple months and finally expressed our feelings over the weekend. i was thrilled. we planned a date and when i called him to confirm times and such the next day he said that he can't be in a relationship right now. i know he still likes me but what does it mean that he can't be in a relationship right now? what are reasons that a guy would say that?

he might not be sure of his feelings right now, ask him to explain himself...wait for him to come to you, because it sounded like he second guessed himself after he told you he liked u...talk to him then take a step back, have him take the initiative

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So Ill try to make this as short as I can, but I've liked this guy name Jamie for a while. Like a year and a halff. He liked me back for a while also and we kind of hooked up and were supposed to go on a date. but ever since then it never went any further because he said he thought my "pussy smelt" but just because hes never done things like that with other girls before and he thought it was "weird" so he randomly started ignoring me even though he was always reallyyy nice. Well after a longg time and fights and ignoring etc. we started talking like normal againn, and he even started calling me alot and stuff. But then, randomly on the phone he's like " Oh, well I gtg, well not really but, I want to" so I said okayy? fine byee. After that we were talking a lott on msnn, and he was flirting with me and stuff and being really nice. And I told him I liked him and he said :O I thought you liked sam? (This other guy I liked). So I told him yeah but he keeps calling me and stuff and I liek guys that are hard to get (half as a joke half not)much after that and he stopped talking as much on msn. And when I saw him on the city bus he just smiled? when I said hi.When I asked him about it he said oh sorry I didnt mean to ignore you, I smiled? With my sleeve over my mouth. I dont know if he was joking or what? Do you have any advice on thiss? Or anything you think about it all would help, thanks :).

no offense, but this guy sounds like a jerk, u should have stopped talking to himmafter he insulted ure "lower region"...he sounds wishy washy and he is playing games with you....I suggest, if he does something else, tell him off, and stop talking to him...maybe he'll even come around if you stop giving him the time of day for while...make him miss you, cuz jerks dont deerve u

Hope I helped
XOXOXO

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Ugh... GUY PROBLEMS... AGAIN. Haha. Well i will keep it short bc i myself hate reading long ones. Well i like this guy who is a friend. We talk a lot on myspace and aim. He's always the one to say hi first and stuff. Idk i kind of get the vibe he likes me but i'm not sure. we talk in person too but not so much lately. I really like him. Ok but some girl from another school asked him to her sadies. Ugh the little slut. Haha not really a slut. Ok so how do you think i can win him. Or just get him to like me. Are there any techniques to hinting i like him? HELPPPP

ok, so its not so much about winning him, because i think u already have him hooked, its just about putting yourself out there. You want to put ureself in a posistion where you are the one he is thinking about when he is alone. When you see him, talk to him, walk by him and flash a gorgeus smile, its the little things that get boys' minds wrapped around you. Put yourself out there a little. You want him wanting you...if you really like him...fight for him girl...continue doing what your doing on myspace and aim. Dont so much focus on "winning", focus on keeping him, and more

Hope I helped!

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okay so
this guy (not my boyfriend...though we act like we're going out) when we're together...well we're all over each other. like ill sit in his lap and he'll have his arms around me...we tease each other and talk to each other in baby voices...hold each others hands everywhere, lean our heads on each other, rub eachothers legs, give each other massages, kiss... yada yada.
and im sooooooo happy.
theres just one issue.
like
when we're leaving
like
we just leave
we say bye, see you (whenever)
or what ever
but like
it just seems so unfriendly!
like
a hug would be nice
how can i make him see that??? without asking him, i dont wanna seem over clingy and stuff since we "arent going out"

well it wouldnt seem clingy if you bring it up in a casual random coversation, but a more subtle and less nerve racking approach would be to make the first move, like give him a hug or smile at him before he leaves...but before u talk to him, you need to find out how he feels about you guys' relationship. Like maybe if he feels like you guys are just friends with benefits then he wont see the need to be sincere in saying good bye...however, I think that making the first move like hugging b4 saying goodbye...if he does it back and seems like he likes that, then keep doing what ure doing...if he seems to pull back, either go back to normal or talk to him about it

Hope I helped

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i have this really good friend and i was wondering how can i flirt with him? or just drop some hints without telling him to his face, also when the time is right i was thinking of giving him a note saying how i feel about him but like what would i write? and would that be a good idea? i never done this before please help, thanks

16/f

Well, to flirt with him make it a gradual process, so if he does not feel the same way its not a flat out disappointment for you. Like do a little at first: maybe touching his arm, horsing around by jumping on his back, talk to him on the phone, make flirty jokes. Then if he doenst resist, start maybe leaning your head on his shoulders, hugging him closely, making jokes that could be interpreted as flirting or not, . And keep on progressing, then when you get really close to him, and able to be really comfortable with each other, and you think he's taking the bait, ask HIM (not you first) how he feels about you, and you may even volunteer some of your feeligns on him. I hope all goes well. I am actually doing it now, and its all about trial and error, gradually egetting forward and blunt. I think I'm doing good so far...so I have faith you will end up with your friend if that is what you want

Hope I helped

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my boyfriend and i have been going out for almost two months, and i used to really like him. i had liked him for almost a year and then once we got together (maybe after a month or so) all of my stronger feelings for him just faded away. i was positive that i was in love with him when we were just friends, but now i can barely stand him at times. it seems like i can't even flirt with other boys and that sometimes bothers me. i feel like i was waiting for just so long and then once i finally got it, i wasn't into it anymore. this has really been bothing me because i don't know if i should break up with him or just wait and see. i'm his first "official" girlfriend and i'm afraid i'll crush him if i break up with him. please help me!!! what should i do??

Just because he hasnt had a girlfriend before does not mean you should spare him a break up, its your happiness hun, maybe the fact that you wanted him for so long it became your gaol, and once you reached it it doesnt seem as appealing. I say if you dont like him, its time to break up, but if there is a still a chance, talk to him and give him a little bit longer. It sounds like you want to be free again, go for what you think you need

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14/f

k well i kinda have 2 questions here.

1:
like me and my friend dante got really close this year as friends but just friends and i'm always laying on him when i'm tired like just putting my head on his shoulder. i mean i'm just really comfortable around him.but is that wierd though because we are just friends?

2:
this guy i'm talking to right now, steven, is a really sweet guy and we both like eachother but were not going out just yet because he just got out of a realationship and wants a break. well taht's what he told me. i only get to see him in the morning so i kinda want to know how to be more flirtatious and alittle more forward without seeming awkward you know?

thank you so much =]

1. no its not weird at all, every girl needs a friend that she can be so comfortable around that she can be affectionate with without hving an agenda. You know the kind that you can lay on top of without anythought, just because. The kind you can be close with without feelings. Just don't lose that

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ok so im a 15 year old girl and for two years idk
why but i think girls are hot i can't help but look at there bodies and stuff and i actually have and internet girlfriend but i know i like guys to but they don't really you know make me happy sexually i mean i can see myself doing it with a girl and a boy together but i can't with just a boy and idk why i need total help . i know for years ive been tryin to hide that i think girls are hotter than guys but know that im about to be 16 i want to figure out my sexuality and have it out in the open so i can start looking for that special someone so any advice will be greatly appreciated thanks in advance .

Sorry to break it to you hunny but I think you are a lesbian, thats ok, but i think your still stuck on guys because that is what you are taught is natural, but dont fight the feeling if you've felt this way for years now. Because your obviously confused I want you, as slutty as this seems, to go on a random date with a guy... dont be too forward but get pretty far, if you think it is too weird and you are sure that guys are not for you, then by all means, be happy with you know you are. In the words of Chris Crocker: " Love yourself, know yourself, because who else knows you better than you." I hope everything works out. Be yourself. BUt first find out who that is. Hope I helped XOXOXOX

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ok i'm going to start off here ...ok i loss my virginity in sep. to this really cute sweet guy.((he's my bff cousin)) and we've had sex together 3 times and out of all this time he never told me that he had a girlfriend my bff and him live together ... to make a longggggg story short he broke up with his gf like a couple of weeks ago and before that i gave him a love letter telling him how i feel about him. but anyways now since he's single he havent said any thing about the letter but i go over there almost every weekend and the tension is there im very shy around him and he know that i love him and i just wanna pounce on him sooo bad ...ok hes single now but i wanna be his girl friend badly... how do i tell him verbaly that i do ... p.s i have his number but never calls ...o yeah he called me umm monday but i was in the shower i diddnt call back help me i really love him

ok, so this sounds like this could work in your favor. Dont go too much longer without talking about the love letter. You need to know how he feels about you...not just reasong his actions and body languages but hearing him say it. I've been in this situation, and waited almost two weeks before i or him brought it up, because I was nervous, like I'm guessing you are, beause you dont know waht he is really going to say. But I did it subtlely. i told him that I knew that he read it, and that i knew that he knew that he had to say something about it eventually (yes I made it sound confusing on purpose, to make it a lighter atmosphere). Anyway he got the picture, and i let him bring it up...no matter what exactly he says, you have to hear him say what he feels. I loved the guy too, so i know how you feel. BUt you have to confront him...about him having sex w/you and having a girlfriend and then breaking up with her, and where that leaves you guys. With my situation, I talked with him on the phone the same day he read it, and he never brought it up. So you have to take the initiative. I hope he says what you hope that he says. I hope I helped!

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Okay, so i have a boyfriend of 3, almost 4 months. He is one of the sweetest guys i have come across in a long while, but lately, that has changed. For the past 3 weeks he has barely been hanging out with me, or talking to me. He is apologizing and "trying to fix it" but its just hard to deal with, really hard.
While on the other hand, i have another boy that likes me. That i liked before me and my boyfriend started dating, but i just found out he likes me, about 3 weeks to a month ago. We talk a lot [just as friends for now] and hang out, and i am starting to like him more and more. And he is a lot sweeter to me than even my own boyfriend is at this point, and i feel like i want to be with him.
The catch is, i am my boyfriend's first real girlfriend and he is a junior in highschool, while i am a sophomore, so i would feel bad to be his first broken heart, especially if he really is trying to fix things, and i have no idea what to do.

Well, think about your happiness first...u being his first girlfriend should not be ure excuse for him. I think that you should sit down and have a heart to heart with your boyfriend. Tell him that things just havent been the same lately and that you are feeling like you guys' relationship is being strained, and may possibly be ending, if you and him dont make the effort. Then, hear his response. If his answer seems heartfelt, try it for like two more weeks, and see if it is alot better and if he's trying. If his response is so that you think its not worth it...i suggest you end it, and then continue talking to the other sweeet guy. If you do end up breaking up with your boyfriend, try not to rush into things with the other guy, that way you ensure that you are over and done with your boyfriend, and that you really want to be with the other.

Hope I helped!

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ooook so there is this guy. i met him in 2006 and ever since, he's all i've thought of. everything in my life i do to impress him or whatnot. hes one of my close friends and he knows i used to like him, although im sure he knows i still do. whenever im with him i just feel...happy. i feel like life is perfect and like i never want to go home. and when im not with him, i feel crappy. i feel self-conscious, depressed, etc. did i mention he goes to another school and i only see him like once every 3 weeks? so, as you can expect thats a lot of time feeling depressed and crappy.

i want my life to move on. usually about once a month i try to get a life of my own and make other friends and try not thinking about him. but it never works and im beginning to think it never will. so this is where i turn to advicenators. i need help. im sick of feeling depressed, im sick of not having my own life, im sick of my crappy friends who never want to talk about real-life problems, im just sick of the life i claim to live.

any thoughts?

funny thing is, I am kinda in the same situation, exvept i live 50 miles away from him, and I see him every weekend. But its not that i feel depressed when I'm not around him, but I just dont feel like talking to a whole lot of other people. So this is what you should do....win win situation: continue being around him whenever you can, since he makes you feel happy, but during the time that you are not with him, it is important to make a concious and hard effort to strike up conversations with other people (girls and es. guys). That way you are occupied, and you will start to feel better about yourself. Find other ways to occupy yourself. And another big suggestion (if you dont dothis already) start talking on the phone with the guy that you only see once every three weeks. Its easier to be away from someone if you keep in close contact during the week...whether it be phone, email, myspace, facebook, etc.
It will get easier....but only if you believe it will

I hope everything works out
XOXO

btw and if you are religious (cuz I am) ....try praying

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my boyfriend used to be the one to care more and like me more and everything so he used to tell me to care more and now im the one who is overcaring and telling him i love him..he used to tell me he loves me and now doesnt anymore because he says i take it too seriously..how do i get him to do nice things for me again and show me again that he DOES care..please help me im so hurt. =[

Well, since he is your boyfriend, you should def. talk to him abotu how you are feeling. But dont sit down and talk tooo solemnly, so he wont think that you are backing him into a corner. You should stop telling him you love him as much, and back off just a little. That way, if he does still care, he will pick up the slack. Maybe he wants to be the one to do that stuff. Act like you dont care. But still be a good girlfriend. Its possble. I really hope you save relationship.
XOXO

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So i want to get my boyfriend (13) something for christmas. Not to expensive ($20). any ideas? i've already ruled out video games, cologne, and clothes. i really appreciate it your help. We've been going out for about 3 monthes and he said he'll like what ever i get him but i dont want to get him something stupid =P
PS- i was thinking a movie. any good movies?

you can get him a tie....or better yet get him a gift card to a video game store, or his favorite store. Put like $10-20 on it, and a nice heartfelt card. Thats the best, thats what i got my boy friend.

Hope you take my advice

XOXOXO

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whats the difference between loving someone and being in love with them?

Good example ummm, the boy I like and am also good friends with. I love him. And not just as a friend, I honestly love him, but I am not in love him. I think it is more that you are in love with someone, when it is mutual. Like if me and the boy I like ever end up together, it will be then when i fall in lvoe with him. Also, it is better to love someone first on your own, because you can fall in and out of love with someone. And when you do , if you loved them first it is easier to part ways, and be somewhat satisfied .I hope i answered your question.

XOXO

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My boyfriend of 3 months and i broke up a week ago today. I have had the worst week and the stupid thing is, its all over the reasoning as to why we broke up. You see, things had been weird with him the week leading up to the breakup and i asked him what was wrong and he told me the news... hes moving at the end of the year. ten hours away to be exact.

I messaged him telling him that I didnt want to wait around to have my heart broken at the end of the year and he agreed that it would be 'smart' of us to break it off sooner rather than later. He said letting me go was going to be hard but it was better this way.

The thing is... i know i love him. And that I really just want to be with him. We are still friends but have stopped the whole couples thing (no touching...no kissing etc) but everytime i see him i just want to fall back into his arms and be how we used to be.

He told me the only thing that would change would be that we wouldnt do couple things but we could still go over to each others houses and be good friends and that he would always love me.

I really dont know what i should do, do i gradually de-attach myself?

Is it wrong to feel like this, and should i try and mask my feelings of love from him?

Was it smart to break up now and save the heartbreak later? Should I tell him how i feel or would that just make him feel worse for moving when i know he doesnt want to?

Is it wrong to feel jealous when i see him talking and mucking around with other girls and is it wrong to still message him and talk to him at school AND have him over at my house like old times?

HELP!!!!

NO, your feelings are just fine, and they make sense. Look, dont take the safe way out, especially in love. The fact that he is moving is just reason to spend alot more time with him, and bond more. If you have to break up when he moves then fine. But for now, what you need to do is be completely honest with him. if he loves you back then he will understand and most likely will feel the same way. Get back with him, and Cherish the time you have with each other. Never minimize ure happiness, because of uncertainty and fear...work through it gurl. PLEASE. and no, i am kinda in the same situation, and talking to him the same amount of time, and having him over ure house, and keeping things the same except for the physical isnt wrong, it just is more reason to continue being with him. but i understand why you broke it off, because I probably would have done the same thing..But that is just fear, and when you have a good guy that you know should be with, and love, then gurl, by all means....GET URE MAN BACK!! I hope you end up with him, and that everything works out!

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I'm 15.
and boyfriendless.
and it sucks.
so i was talking to my friend Amelia, and she says i don't flirt with guys enough. all of my friends are guys, I'm really feminine, but i have a lot of guy friends, and i tend to act... not flirty? i guess.
ugh, idk. i guess i'm asking, if theres anything i can do to to flirt more/ be more confident?
don't laugh, this is my first post.

I would never laugh, my advice for you is to find maybe two guys that catch ure attention (u can start out with one if you like)....but these guy(s) have to be accessible, like ones you see on a consistent regular basis. If you dont flirt alot, then it might not come as easily, (im like this), so imagine ureself looking at them sheepishly (u know shy, with a hint of a smile) until they notice and then look away. The catch is that if you want to be in control, when they catch you looking, then you have to look away slowly, maybe even smile first. U have an advantage having alot of guy friends, because that means that you shouldnt have trouble going up to a guy and talkin to them. Smile alot, and when you are talking to them, stare at them straight in the eyes, and giggle. If youare doing it right (which im sure u will be) then the boys will be receptive, and react to you. When you notice that they are reacting in a good way to ure gestures, then believe me, you will feel in control and more confident. If you dont like them like that, then thats cool, at least you will have the confidence to go for someone you really like. I really hope i helped

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ok so almost 2 years ago i started talking to this boy was friends he dated my best friend at the time a little while after they broke up we started "talking" then he asked me out one night like 2 days later he broke up with me he told me at the time it was cause he needed time to talk to me more and stuff turns out he was drunk well we "talked" for about a month dont see how he could be drunk that whole time well after we stoped talking he dated a few of my friend for some months then the summer came we got friends like good friend he was gonna ask me out then asked someone else out then they broke up he was gonna ask me out asked one else out then they broke up and i was so close then he thought i liked his friend asked someone else out and he hated me for a while then we got back friends when they broke up and we was kewl for a while but only friends then out of no where he would be mean and that went on for a while then not to long ago we got back friends and things were going great and then he found another girl and now he says mean things about me i told him to leave me alone so i can get over him but hes the only one i think ill ever want and idk what to do i know this is long but please someone give me advice.

I know how you feel, and at least you are aware of the fact that if you keep on being around him, then you will continue to want him and think about him and ultimately like him still. If you really, truly want to get over him, then I think you should space yourself from him, and figure out and tell yourself why it wont work out, because it sounds like he is not only a bad friend, but wouldnt be a very good boyfriend. Even if he talks to you, stand strong, and distance yourself away from him. When you think you dont like him anymore, then try talking to him for a little while and see if the feelings come back. If they do repeat the process. I am kinda sorta in this situation too, and the best way to get over him is officially tell yourself that you are going to try to better your friendship with him...and dont forget to look for someone who is better than him, that would be a good person to start a relationship with.

I really Hope I helped
Alesia

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14/f

this is long, sorry.

i know this guy named Corbin, & he goes to my church. he'll be in 10th grade, but i'll be in 9th. he's good friends with my brother, because they both like the same music and they were in the church worship band together.

i went down to this church camp for a cookout and concert w/ my church, and he was there. when we were waiting for the concert to start, me and him and like 5 other people from my church were out there. there was this piano, and i started to mess around and play this really pretty song, Clair DeLune. well he's like really good i guess, and he came over to the piano and showed me how i did it wrong, then played the first minute or so perfectly. and i kindof have a weakness for guys who are good on the piano/guitar/ect... and then when he was done, he played "The Luckiest" by Ben Folds, which is my favorite song and it's amazing. that song always makes me cry, so of course i teared up a little, and he gave me a big hug and such.

this concert was three christian rock bands, and the third one is called Our Hearts Hero. they're really good friends with our church and such. when they got on stage, i was in the front row, standing. and corbin came adn stood right behind me. there was other places to go, but idk. so when they started to play a slow and sad song, i looked in this mirror that was on the wall behind the stage, and i saw that corbin was looking at me. i was too scared to turn around, so i just payed attention to the band.

after the concert, corbin came over to me, and we started talking about showchoir and how i was thinkign about quitting, for next year. he's in the band that plays with them, and he was like begging me to do it, and he said "please? do it for me, we'll see eachother every day!"

soo the basic question i have here is that how can i know he likes me? i mean he goes to my church and i see him a lot so i don't want it to be awkward if i ask him and he says no.
i really want himt o like me because he's everything i want in a guy...

thanks in advance.

I am really happy for you, because it sounds like this Corbin is very interested in you. You dont have to ask him, because it sounds to me like he will act like that all on his own. If he is everything you want in a guy, def. talk to him more, get to know him really well, and make sure you stay on his mind. I personally am tryin to work with a church relationship, and you know what the best part about that is? You can easily invite him over for a church dinner, or even better: invite him, with like two other mutual fun chruch friends and go to dinner and a movie (thats what I do with my church friends). It seems like you are gettin your wish, i think he def. has feelings for you. Good luck

Hope I helped

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So today we had this presentation today and I ended up sitting infront of this boy that I've liked for the longest time now. Randomly out of the middle of nowhere, his friend and him decided it'd be fun to bug me by nudging be in the back with their foot, pretending to step on my fingers etc. They didn't hurt me in anyway but when I'd turn around to tell them to stop this boy I liked had the biggest smirk on his face. It was cute.

Him and I have never really talked but if I am not wrong we have exchanged glances, awkward moments ect..

Would this just sound like a completely random act or an act of affection?

Ok, next time, you get a chance to communicate with him is too ask him for it himself. meaning, if you want his email address, ask him for, same thing with his number. Guys are weird like that...maybe he was just suprised, or had to get off. But the things he was doing to you, sounds like he wants your attention, and that could be looked at potentially as flirting. I say next time, start up a conversation/flirting thing with him. Be consitent, but not clingy...he obviously wants your attention, make sure you have his

Good luck with this boy

Hope I helped

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