BEAUTiFULxoxLiES's

advice column

about

advice

15/f.
i have a crush on this guy at my school. hes smart cute easy to talk to hot nice athletic funny. the total package i guess you could say.
but the thing is i'm so overly shy i can't talk to him because i don't know what to say. so i had my friend go and say that she was doing a poll for a class and have her find out things about him. (stupid i know) so anyway he found out the truth about the reason why she did this. i don't know how because i didnt tell anyone and he found out that i liked him but he just thinks of me as a friend. which was a relief because i knew he could have said he hated me i was planning on asking him to sadie hawkins and become good friends with him before i ask him but i'm too embarrassed to even say hi to him because of what happened so i feel that its impossible for me to ask him to sadie. and i'm worried he might think of me as a coward or a liar because of the fake interview. did i ruin my chance of being his friend, asking him to sadie hawkins, and possibly having a relationship with him? how can i get over my embarrassment to talk to him and should i confront him about what i had my friend ask him these questions thanks for your time :)
p.s i know you guys probably think i'm an idiot for this but i am so shy it's not even funny please try to understand

Try to make a joke out of it...like come up with a clever line to say to him as to why she did that for you..rather yet text him. Or if you want to confront him in person just make sure he's alone. You might still be able to pull off the 'going to the sadie dance ' with him..but you gotta come clean as to why you had your friend ask. I mean I'm sure he'd like to hear from you that you like him then someone else, even if he doesn't feel the same. So try to do that and if he shoots you down - well then you gotta move on.

[view]

15/f... ok so basically, in just about every relationship i've ever been in, I've been the one to screw it up. I'll either break up with the guy or I'll do something that I know will cause him to break up with me. It's just that, if i'm friends with a guy I can totally be myself around him but the second we start dating, it's really really awkward! I don't know why I keep doing this! And usually, because it becomes so awkward, i'll break off all our dates or something with some lame excuses as to why I can't go and eventually he'll break up with me :( Now, there's this really awesome guy that I think I might have a chance with. I just talked to him on the phone for like 3 hours (Which is a MAJOR thing for me because I NEVER talk on the phone ever because I am TERRIFIED of those awkward silences) and it was so cool because I just talked and we didn't run out of stuff to talk about :) this guy is really cool and we have a lot in common, but I know that the second he asks me out, it will ruin everything :( How do I prevent this? I want him to ask me out, I just don't want everything to be ruined between us :( he's so cool I just don't want to lose him... thank you for reading :)

Well you might want to give him heads up that you are like that..so he can prepare himself. I mean you sound like you're just scared of getting hurt, I've been there - trust me. But you just have to try your hardest and make things work especially if you care for this guy. But like I said - do tell him as to what you tend to do. He might be able to stick around if he knows what's going on instead of just thinking that you're losing interest.

[view]

I'm a senior in high school and there's this i guy i liked and still like and talked to a lot last year. I pretty much didn't see him all summer. Today was the first day of school and I was scared he wasn't gonna be happy to see me but thank god he was and said hi to me and talked to me. I really, really wanna keep talking to him and i really want him to keep on flirting a lot with me but there are a couple of problems. One, we were both in the play together last year, which brought us together but i think he might not be doing it this year and i'm scared it just won't be the same as last year if he doesn't do it. We're in a few classes together but it's not the same. Also, the bigger issue is that he's pretty popular and hangs out with a completely different crowd than i do (he hangs out with pretty much all girls, though) so it's kind of out of the question for us to hang out. It's kind of also out of the question for us to go out for the same reason (i don't really care about that THAT much though, i kind of just wanna flirt/socialize with him A LOT like i did last year). Do you think i should still try to make an effort or just give up? Is there no point?And how can i keep socializing with him if he doesn't do the play?

Ok one, many people will tell you ' tell him how you feel ' but we all know it's deeper than that. Just start texting him, fall into casual conversations with him, hang out with him, and once you both have gotten in the habit of texting every day there's going to be something - and you'll notice a few hints from the way that he talks to you. When it gets maybe 2 weeks into you guys talking...try to throw him hints that you like him.

[view]

My best friend just recently got married to a girl he's been dating for the last year.

During that time, they never touched one another and refrained from sexual contact. She was a VERY pure seeming girl in all ways. When they first started dating she was very open about telling him something around the lines of her wanting to be pure on her wedding night. He, obviously, assumed this meant she was a virgin girl.

My friend is 26 and he's had a crazy past (he has had sex with plenty of girls during his high school and college years). So, needless to say, he knows what "feels good" sexually and what simply doesn't for him.

The girl he has recently married has also had a sexual past, it turns out. She apparently failed to mention it during the months leading up to the marriage though! Instead of just telling him EVERYTHING there was to know about her, she presented herself as being religious and modest for most of her life. So, come the wedding night, he was excited he had gotten married to a pure woman and was looking forward to living a righteous life with her.

Come time to finally get intimate with on another and consummate the marriage, she tells him that she hopes that he's the best she's ever have. He thought that sounded a little odd to say so he asked how many guys she had previously been with. She couldn't seem to pinpoint a number and just kept telling him, "just a few..."

He was upset but had married the girl so he thought he might be able to get past this shock. They go on to being intimate and he finds out that not only is she NOT a virgin like she had previously presented herself to be but her vagina is SO loose! He said there was almost no friction at all and it was a great let-down for what he was expecting his wedding night to be. They had to stop "trying" to have sex and just go to bed because the didn't know how to make things pleasurable for them both.

Now, he's thinking, "What have I gotten myself into! She is obviously not what I thought she was! What else is she hiding from me that is important?"

The next day he asks his friends (including me, of course) to go out and find some information on his now wife. We go out, ask some questions in some bars and to people that seem to know everybody. We find out she was a nasty freak right before they started dating! She use to go out clubbing, drink, smoke, had a lot of miscarriages as well as a handful of abortions. She was constantly with new guys and use to mess around with women, too! One guy even said he thought he might have sold her pills to get high with before.

We couldn't keep this stuff from my friend that married her so we told him the truth of what we had found out. He's SO devastated that she never bothered to tell him these things!

He knows he needs to confront her about these things but he is afraid and doesn't know what to say exactly. I mean, hell, his marriage can fall apart in a matter of minutes--HELL, it already has in his mind! I can't say I wouldn't be any happier myself though. I think I would have left her on the wedding night when she said she wasn't a virgin (I mean, she did act like she was one during the entire time they were dating)!

What should he say to her? He's SO hurt and wants to run away, to say the least. Can anybody help me to help him?

First off, it's not your marriage to get caught up in between, but I would be doing the same thing for my best friend. The best thing he can do is confront her, if it doesn't work and she gets defensive then well they don't have an open communication and their marriage is gonna go down the drain. If he knows that the things he has found out bother him so much he needs to tell her or he's just going to drift away farther from her instead of just TRYING to work things out.

[view]

so my boyfriend and i broke up (the reason why is WAY to long to explain) and i broke up with him, then we got back together, and the next day he broke up with me. anyway i was so mad at him for so many reasons, and i still get mad when i think about it, but at the same time i want him back. he broke my heart and i still want him back. whats wrong with me? how do i get over him?

thanks SO much for ur help

oh i have/had the same problem. Your heart is different then mine so its gonna take time to heal. of course you cared so you want to be with him because you have feelings. The only thing you can do is take one day at a time, hang out with your friends, take your mind off him. Its okay if you think about him and its okay if you cry over him but its just going to take time. there is no brilliant advice to do it, it just takes a while but you will get there.

[view]

i really like this guy. and we started talking a lot towards the end of 9th grade.. and like over the summer we talked and texted.. and one night we even stayed up till 2 in the morning talking online. we talked for four hours. and now 10th grade has started and we kind of haven't talked very much. i mean we texted for a little once... and i talked to him online like once... but that's it. i feel like he lost interest in talking to me. and like i want to reach out and keep talking to him but i don't want him to think of me as bothering him. he never reaches out to me... so should i just stop?

i don ' t think yu should give up . i think if yu like him try . and give him hints that yu want to hang out more . and stuff like IM him and maybe even ask him y yu two lost touch. yu will re-connect if he sees that yur trying . but if after yu guys hang out hes still acting the same then maybe he has lost interest just . ask him . or like i said hang out with him . hope it works out girl . bye

[view]

i am a fifteen year old female. the boy i have been making out with recently wants to step up our relationship. he wants to finger me which i am totally ready for and excited for. the only concern is that i have a lot of pubic hair, so i wonder if he will be grossed out. should i shave it for him? Thanks.

i personally think yu should shave it like idkk its gonna be better even for yu like when your on yur periods just telling you but its your choice to keep it if yu want to girl

[view]

okay,here is the scenario

i met this gal on the net,so what happens is that it is a chatroom,right,and we chat and soon find that we share the same interest and all that.we did not have cyber sex and it was just pure talk,later she sent me her photo and her msn.we soon had a great chat,but she has never seen me before.she then confessed her feelings to me on one night so here's my question:

1)does it count as love when a gal says she loves you when she has never seen you before,but loves your personality,chatting with you and everything else.

don't ask why i did not sent her my pic yet,i'm working on it,but i just wanna ask if it counts as love or not till this point where she doesn't know how i look like but likes my personality and other stuff.

its possible that she could love yu. she might've fallen in love with yur personality its normal . it could be real love . if its not it possibly could grow into that. be careful dont screw it up

[view]

okay so i like this guy and im pretty sure he likes me too, but the problem is my friend used to like him. she is now involved with another guy and she told me before that she didn't like him anymore. would it be wrong if i started to go out with him?

i had this same problem. the girl said she didnt like him and she was with someone else. well guess wut she ruined it for me too :-/ she started a whole lotta stuff and we broke up. but if yu think yu 2 could stick it out if something like that happened go for it girl dont even wait

[view]