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Website: Straight UP Advice Onedayatatime
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Member Since: October 10, 2008
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Last Update: November 1, 2008
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im going threw a whole lot of shit right now in my life im 18f senior in high school . i live with my mom still but lately her ways and her rules are getting to me (shes a bit abusive )and im overwhelmed with school work.my boyfriend who is 20 is a great guy i enjoy being around him he always makes me happy but im not sure if i can have him in my life right and im a virgin that is not planning on having sex now he knows im a virgin his not a virgin im afraid that i might have sex with him too early just for comfort.but i dont think i can deal with all that in my life right now should i break it off with him. (link)
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ADVICE
I dont feel you need to break up with him, he sounds like a really decent guy. I would talk to him and tell him what you just stated here. You might want to have a little space right now, but I see no reason why you should break up with him. If he knows you are a virgin and not ready and he is not pushing the issue he probably respects you more for your decision. I think you where wise in choosing to wait on having any kind of sexual relationship. Along with sexual relations comes alot of emotions and stress. Which I agree you might not be able to handle right now. I would just be honest with your boyfriend, I am sure he will understand. I see no need to hurt him over something that you are not even sure will happen. Just be clear with him on why you feel the way you do, and the reasons why you dont feel ready yet. If he cares for you he will understand, and be ok with it. I would do everything you can to hold onto a decent guy. You will find that their are alot of men out there who would not be so understanding or nice. I would be proud of the fact that you have found someone as special as him, and not be so fast to want to discard him. I think you and your boyfriend have a good thing going and you need him right now. Especially with the way your mother is acting. If you get to the point wear you are feeling weak and might make a mistake, you are not ready for. Just say to him your not ready and you need some space and time to think about things. As far as your mom goes, sit down and have an adult conversation with her. Face to face and tell her everything that is bothering you and why. Also remind her that you are an adult and you would like to be treated a little bit better, since you are no longer a little kid. She needs to see that confidence in you and understand that she has raised you to become a very intelligant and wise person. Its hard for a parent to admit their baby does not need or really want them around anymore. So have a heart to heart talk with her. Let her see the person you have become and not what she might be thinking you are. All this stress does not have to fall just on you. You can make your situation much more bareable once you have the confidance you need to do it. Also if your a little bit scard and you feel comforable enough with your boyfriend, have him their as a moderater. If it seems like you and your mother are getting to upset and emotions are flying, ask him to be the peace maker and keep things calm. Your mother will need to get to know him a little bit better, and this would be something good for all of you. Its a real adult way for it to be discussed. Maybe then your mother will have a differant view point all around. It takes guts and confidance to be that way, facing a problem head on. Its the best way to be with what life throws at you. Do this and you can do anything you set your mind to doing. I wish you the best of luck and keep me posted on how things are going, or if you have any more questions. Feel free to drop me a line in my inbox anytime.
Always remember take a deep breath and take it onedayatatime
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Tell me one question that I can ask to Christopher Columbus? (link)
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ADVICE
If you could ask christopher columbus a question I would ask these.
1. What struggels did he face on his voyage by
sea?
2. What where his feelings when he discovered
the new world?
3. Why was he known by so many differant names?
4. What gave him the influence to want to tell
non christans about Jesus Christ?
5. What where people really like back in 1492?
6. If he could have redone anything over would he
change any of it?
I hope these help you out, let me know what you think and get back with me...
And remember onedayatatime...
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This is just a curiosity question. If a woman worked for very powerful men in a large corporation for many years as the powerful men’s secretary but no longer works for them (she hasn’t seen them in 11 years) do you think the powerful men still keeps tabs on her. Keep in mind they were very possessive of her and the bosses either treated her as a sister or a daughter.
(link)
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ADVICE
Well if these people looked at her like a sister or a daughter, they might just keep track of her. When people work at any job for any extended period of time part of that work place, can become like a second family. So yes I feel this is something that is very within reason. I myself still have contact with a few people I worked with at one time or another. These people became my friends and when you care about them, the work situation is no longer the issue. So when jobs ends, it does not mean that the friendships or feelings ever stop. So if you where just curious about, if this is something that really happens my answer to you is yes. It happens very often. As far as the former boss or others being possessive, the stronger the bond they had, the stronger the possessiveness will become. It just comes along with having the feelings of a second family. They are not related but yet you cant tell the differance. So I hope this helped you out, let me know what you think...
Take a deep breath, and always remember to take it ondayatatime.
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ohkay well i like this guy... and i THINK he likes me back, because he's teasing me that i like him!!!!!!! its soo annoying T.T
but i dont know, because hes the "class clown" soo, he might just be teasing me... AND he took my cool sharpener (its a baseball with a weight on the bottom so it spins) so i let him have it cuz, i like him LOL.
back to the question, so can anyone answer my question, if a guy teases me, does it nessecerily mean he likes me???? (link)
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ADVICE
Gonna give you my own personal experiance on this one. When I was in high school I got picked on ALL the time by many differant guys all at once. I always thought they did it to be mean, but years later I did find out that some did have an actual interest in me. It all depends on the guy, alot of class clowns will do anything to get attention. If this guy goes out of his way to seek you out and never leave you alone, he is investing alot of time into it but what for? Two answers for this one.
!. He really does like you but does not know how to go about it. Could be his friends might not approve or he is getting picked on about it himself.
2. He is doing it because of the feedback he gets out of your reactions. Maybe your a fun person to pick on. It could be a form of entertainment in a time of boredom.
But I leave this up to you to find out. You will have to flat out ask him. But even in doing this you may not get a truthful answer. You best bet would be to do this in private or over the phone with this guy. I would not do it with other people around.
Most guys in school will do anything to fit in, and peer pessure makes it even harder, when one person, or more than one persn does not think a girl is cool or pretty, they can be cruel. Not only to you directly but to the guy that may like you. I hope this helps a little, and I wish you the best of luck in finding out. However if you do get an answer out of him, let me know what he had to say:)
onedayatatime
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