Bio♥


Hey, I'm Melody! I've been giving advice on and off since 2003. I'm a 23 year old military wife, expecting a baby boy in August, and working on my Bachelor's degree. :)

Oh, and ask me anything!

Advice

I found a lump in my breast last week. It is still about 2 square centimeters big and I believe it is still in stage 1 if it is cancerous. I did some research and I found that if I choose to leave it untreated, I have about 1-2 years left to live. I'm 15, a sophomore in high school. I've had cysts in my ovaries and the lump may be just a cyst too, but I don't want to tell my parents in case it is cancer. They have to put 2 other kids through college, so I don't want to take my siblings' futures away as well. Breast cancer victims normally die, despite all efforts and amount of money. I don't know what to do. Could you help?

You are wrong on 2 counts:

1. That if you have cancer, you are more than likely going to die. That's not true at all, and you should never assume that.

2. That it's probably cancer. If you have a previous history with cysts, then there is a good chance that the lump is a cyst too. You can get them from simply drinking too much caffeine. Never assume the worst, but always be prepared for it (as you already seem to be).

Get to the doctor. It's vital that you do. If you don't want to scare your parents, go the health clinic and have them check it out so if it's nothing, you don't even have to tell them. But you need to go ASAP.

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I know brown discharge for a woman usually just means old blood either right before or after her period. But what if it is no where near my period and I'm getting that discharge? I don't think it's a yeast infection because I'm not burning or itching and it does not have an odor. I also know that discharge is just part of being a woman and that its normal...but is brown normal?

http://www.pamf.sutterhealth.org/teen/health/femalehealth/discharge.html

That link has everything you need to know about discharge. It's always a different color, usually depending on one point you are at in your cycle. Read it, it's very informative and will tell you everything you need to know.

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For some reason I developed a massive crush on a teacher I had. She was young, attractive and really nice. I can't stop thinking about her, . I keep thinking she hates me or think I'm stupid, even though there's no proof of that, and I keep thinking she'll completely forget me and I made a fool of myself in my class even though I really didn't. The thoughts of her not liking or having a bad impression of me pain me so much,. I also find myself staring at her yearbook picture constantly and I feel miserable and mopey all the time. How do I get rid of this crazy infatuation? .I would never act on the crush don't worry about that. Don't tell me I need to get over it I already know that I just don't know how?

If its sick and wrong I understand but its happened so I just need some tips on how to stop feeling this way

There is nothing sick about it. Lots of kids have crushes on their teacher. What's important is that you don't act on these impulses.

There is no way to stop a crush. If you like someone, then you like them. You can't force yourself to quit. Try not to think about her as much though. Throw yourself into something so you won't think about her as much, and try meeting girls your own age. Eventually this crush will pass, they usually always do! :)

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15/m
i just came to a new school last week. its been a week now and i dont really hangout with anybody during lunch or anything. its not that im weird or shy or anything, its just that people there have their own friends already. What do i do?
for the last week i just walked around the whole campus in circles just to kill time until lunch ends.

i dont wanna do that anymore!

i know its easy for a girl to make friends at a new school, but its not that easy for a guy.



help.

Just so you know, it's not easy for girls either. Especially since females have a tendency to be vicious within their cliches. If you want to make friends, be friendly. Find someone who looks lonely too, and strike up a conversation with them. Or find a group of people who seem to be nice and introduce yourself. You have to put yourself out there if you want people to like you. Consider joining a club or sport as well. That's a great way to meet people that have the same common interests as you. :) Good luck.

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Hello Advicenators,

I like the Harry Potter books and the entire Twilight series. I was wondering is the Vampire Diaries by L.J. Smith was a good book or not. I think LJ Smith wrote the Night World series too but I never caught that one. Anyway, would someone who enjoys those sorts of books (Harry Potter and Twilight) enjoy Vampire Diaries?

Oh, and by the way, is the Vampire Diaries similar to Twilight in any way other than involving vampires? I REALLY loved the romance between Edward Cullen and Bella Swan...

I'm not sure about the romance part, but I think my cousin has read the Diaries, and she loves Harry Potter and Twilight as well. Get the first one from the library, and see if you like it. If you do, then buy the rest.

Another good vampire series is the Blue Bloods and The House of Night. Consider those?

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Anybody know of some good books? I'm seventeen and a girl and I like romance books and stuff like that but I hate books about popularity and stuff like that.

Everyone suggested the Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer, and it is a good group of books, I will give them that. I have loved that series forever, but it is highly overrated. Just keep that in mind. :)

The Harry Potter series by J.K Rowling is awesome. There is not a lot of romance in them, but nevertheless it is an amazing set of books. Way better than the movies, and those are good too by the way.

The Luxe series by Anna Godbersen is also good. The whole books are about love. You may like them. There are three out right now. The Luxe, Rumors, and Envy, and the fourth book, Splendor, releases in October.

An older book you may like is Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. It's a great book, but it's kind of hard to read. I would suggest watching the movie first so you kind of a have a jist as to what's going on. It makes it easier to understand. If you like this book, you will most likely enjoy all of Austen's novels.

All of Nicholas Sparks' books are amazing. Dear John, The Choice, and Nights in Rodanthe are some of my favorites. Even Now by Karen Kingsbury is really good. It is kind of sad, but it is a very easy read and you will not want to put the book down. The Pact by Jodi Picoult is also good. I'm not a huge fan of Sarah Dessen novels, but a lot of people our age are. So you may check them out too.

If you want anymore suggestions, let me know!

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im a freshman in college so i've only been here about 4 weeks. and i have some major questions.

1. at the moment im a biology major because i want to be a radiology technician so pre-med requires either a bio or chem major... i hate both of those, so i'm pretty miserable. how exactly do you go about changing majors? like could i just walk up in there one day and be like i want a different major and have to get all my classes changed all of a sudden?

2. i'm not sure what exactly i want to do. i'm in between physical therapy [specializing in athletics], radiology, or forensic investigation. soo.. like what the heck i dont even know what to do? how do i talk to an advisor when each "college" has its own advisor and they're geared towards taking classes in a particular subject. like how do i get this shit figured out and learn what i want to do so i dont screw around for a year taking classes i dont need.

3. we're already being told to make appointments with our advisors about registering for classes next semester, but again, everything from #2 comes up. and next semester would just be the same classes i have now pretty much [biology, chem, english, & calculus] but just the 2nd part of them.

4. i know for radiology there are a lot of tech schools that have 2 year programs where you can graduate with an associates degree to be a technician. so let's say i do 4 years at this university that i'm at now, get a bachelor's degree in.. something?... and then decide to be a radiology technician. will i still have to do the 2 year associate's degree even though i have a bachelor's degree already?

i'm sooooo confused as to how this works, and i'm really feeling the pressure to get it straightened out. i know that PLENTY of people come to college in between career paths, or have NO idea what they want to do and i'm not alone, but it seems like everyone i meet knows exactly what they want and are doing so well in their classes because it IS what they want. ahhh. help!?

Just relax. Your advisor is there for a reason, and he or she can help you answer all of these questions. I can tell you that you have absolutely nothing to worry about, so you can calm down a little bit.

If you want to change majors, tell your advisor. You really don't have to do that until your second sememster or even your second year. There is no point in doing it now. I am in a similiar situation. I also just started school, and when I was signing up for college and my classes, we had to choose a major. I chose General Studies. Basically that just means you are taking your core classes until you decide what it is you want to do. I plan on changing my major to Education next semester.

It's okay to not know what you want to do because regardless you have certain classes you have to take, such as; biology, English, math, history, et cetera. Depending on what you want to do, you continue with certain classes. For example, since you want to be a biology major, you would continue taking biology classes until you graduate and I would stop after two semesters because that's all the science I need. So really you have nothing to worry about this semester. You would still have to take all those classes regardless of what you want to do, so you aren't wasting any time. Colleges usually suggest to know what you want to major in by your second year. By then you will know if you like biology, and if that's what you want to major in.

You can get an associate's degree for Radiology, but you will make more money and have a better chance at getting a job if you have a bachelor's. If you had a bachelor's degree in let's say, English, and you decided to be a radiology technician, what you would probably do is take all the classes that you would normally have to take to be a technician that you didn't already take while getting your bachelor's. Then you would have a bachelor's in English, and an associate's in Radiology.

Don't feel pressured. Just talk to your advisor and ask everything you asked in your question. They are there to help you, so let them do their job! :)

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But what is marriage? Technically it's nothing but a piece of paper that can be thrown away just as easily by signing another.


That's what you said.....
and i just wanted to comment on it Marriage is a commitment to the love you have for your husband or wife It's the person you are ganna spend your hole life with adn when iit comes down to the day you get married your on you hunny moon You have sex with that person for the first time and its a wonderful feeling knowing its with the person your ganna be with for ever you get to do things that you didnt do while you were dating because it's a new comitment and if you think about it
lets say a person has a bf they have sex there not married so it comes down to that night that is sopose to be so spechal but to them its just a nother night haveing sex it's nothing new you havvent done befor i just thought it was important to tell you srry its kinda long
and also about the bible it is man writen so just trust god and ask him about sex befor marrage.

I appreciate you giving me your opinion, but it's just not the same as mine. Obviously you believe in waiting until marriage, and I think that is fantastic. Good for you if that's what you believe in. But like Tina said while answering your question, if we respect you for waiting, you should respect us if we don't.

I believe in marriage one-hundred percent. I can't wait to get married and to tell you the truth, most likely I will be engaged and then married all in the next three to five years. And just so YOU know, I think our wedding night will be very special. Apparently you are a virgin, and if that's what you believe in then that's wonderful. But obviously you don't know what sex is like. It's an adventure every time if you love the person and you are ready. It's a beautiful experience that never gets old, and there is always new things to be discovered. You said sex wouldn't be special on your honeymoon if you had already done it before. Does that mean if you wait until marriage, that after the honeymoon sex will never be special again? I don't think that at all.

I stand by what I said about what marriage is. I said "technically" as in that is the technical meaning. People get married and divorced all the time. I know of a woman who has been married six times! Obviously it's not a very special committment to her. It is to me though. Just because the technical meaning of marriage is to have a license doesn't mean I don't think it's much more than that. I agree with you in that it is a union that should be cherished. I never said it wasn't.

I have been having sex for three and a half years, and I am only eighteen years old. Am I ashamed? No. Do I try to talk others into having sex just because my sexual experience is less than satisfactory as Peeps said? Definitely not. On the contrary, my sex life is very satisfying. And I certainly don't talk others into having sex. That's a personal decision that no one but that person can make. I would never try convincing someone about sex unless it was to tell them I didn't feel they were ready, because a lot of people aren't. I was. Do I feel I will regret my decision of having sex with my boyfriend? Never. Like I said, I don't believe in having multiple sex partners. I have sex with my boyfriend because I love him and I want to share that with him. I didn't want to wait until marriage, so I didn't. Even if we break up, I have loved him for so long and I will never regret sharing something that was so special to us at the time. It's something that we have shared together, and that will always be ours, so I know I will never regret it.

And to reply to your "since the bible is man written, just trust God and ask him about sex before marriage." That sounds all good and great, but do you honestly think God is going to say one day in the middle of the night, "Yes, it's okay." Or, "No, it's not." God doesn't work like that. You just have to know he's there with you, and make the decision for yourself.

If you would like to reply to anything I said, please reply to it in another question like you did this time. I can't reply back if you put it in the feedback. :)

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f/teen
So my hole family cousins sisters brother aunts uncles etc, all belevie in waiting till marraige and so do i Its hard cause you get tempted but i stick through it.
I know that is what god wants everyone to do and its the right way to do it.

So i was wondering on how you feel about waiting to have sex and doing other things with them?
(besides kissing and makeingout)No fingering bj all that stuff how do you feel about it?

I just recently started to go to church, I am a Christian, and I pray on a regular basis. I love God with all my heart and I feel like I am a good person. Not perfect at all, but I do my best to be the best I can be. I cuss sometimes by accident, but there are certain words that I will NEVER say. I'm sure you know what they are. I try not to hate people. I know God wouldn't want that, so I do my best to forgive or look over the people that have hurt me in the past. I know there are certain sins that are inevitable, and God never expected us to be perfect; just to try.

I have never read the whole bible from beginning to end. It overwhelms me even though I am an avid reader. I know some of the basic stories and to tell you the truth, I don't agree with some of them. I also don't always agree with some of the things our pastor says at church. Does that mean I don't believe in God? Not at all. I don't go to church every single Sunday, and I am sure the poeple at that church do not neccessarily consider me a "member" but they welcome me with open arms every time I do go, and that's what I like about them.

I know the bible says not to have sex before marriage, but I do. I have been with my boyfriend for over four years, and we have been having sex for the majority of that time. And to tell you the truth, I have never regretted that decision. I believe in my heart that I will be with him for the rest of my life, and I have planned on marrying him since I was fourteen years old. I couldn't tell you why I think it's okay to have sex before marriage, and I won't try to give you some out of my butt explanation as to why I think it's okay. I will say that in my opinion, the reason sex before marriage is considered bad is because it can be emotionally hurtful for many reasons. Pregnancy, break up, etc. And when you are young at that age, it adds that much more to the possible heartbreak. A lot of teens have sex with lots of partners, and I think that's wrong. I believe sex is sacred, and should only be experienced with someone you love and cherish with all of your heart. It's not something to be taken lightly, and I don't take it lightly at all. I believe that's why most people believe in waiting until marriage. But what is marriage? Technically it's nothing but a piece of paper that can be thrown away just as easily by signing another. I know the bible says to wait, but I think when it discusses marriag, it means more of a spiritual union as opposed to a written one. Keep in mind that the bible is man made, and it is open to error. It's not like God himself typed it out. There are two copies (Old and New) and both contradict themselves from what I have heard. So why should we listen to it word for word since everyone interprets things differently.

Even though I believe in God, I think the most important thing to remember is the state of being good. There have been many religions since the dawn of time, and almost all montheism religions all have similiar stories and the same basic beliefs. What makes one more true then another when they have the same stories? Basically, I believe in God, I trust in him with all my heart, and I believe in Christian beliefs. However I think the most important thing is being good, and I don't believe God sends good people to hell.

This is really long, and I apologize. I just want you to hear my whole story as opposed to, "I believe in God, but I am going to totally contradict myself by saying I think it's okay to have sex!" :) So there you go.

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i don't understand why guys like girls with the natural look. one of my best guy friends is a very popular guy. he's captain of the football, hockey and baseball team at his school. now i'd think he'd go for some hot blonde who looks like a barbie but not at ALL. he goes for all these girls who don't wear make-up. i'm like so confused! when i don't wear make-up i look very tired! i wear liquid eyeliner on the top lid of my eyes, and mascara. i wear blush every now and then & a bronzer. i honestly think i look better with makeup but now i'm having different thoughts. is it really true that guys think girls with barely any/no makeup are more attractive? i just dont understand how that is!

I believe it has a lot to do what all the other columnists said about being comfortable in their own skins. However I think the biggest thing is if a girl looks good without makeup, then she's a natural beauty. She's going to be that much prettier when she does doll up a bit.

I had a girl in my high school who wore makeup every single day of her life. I knew her for 3 years, and NEVER seen her without foundation and eye makeup. I cheered with her, and just happened to catch a glimpse of her in the bathroom during cheer camp as she was taking her makeup off, and she was scary looking! She was gorgeous with her face dolled up, but without it she wasn't the least bit pretty. Wouldn't that freak a guy out pretty bad if he married a girl who always wore makeup and then seen how creepy she looked without it?

I guess maybe that's it.

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As ashamed as I am too say this, The last time I picked up a book and read the entire thing was 8 years ago.

My question is does anyone know a really good book? Something that isn't a century long lol..

I saw someone suggest "Speak" on another post it sounded very interesting and I will look into that one. However, I like books about reality, Drama, Real life storys not so much romance novels but survival storys or something that someone went through in life. Also if anyone could suggest some really good books related to Anxiety and Depression would be fantastic!

P.S. I have already read all the David Pelzer books.

Thanks!

The perfect book for you would be The Outsiders. It's not long at all and it's easy to read. It's a wonderful coming of age survival story. It's by S.E Hinton, and I think it would be the perfect novel for you.

By the way, only read Lovely Bones or any other Alice Seabold novels for that matter, if you are ready to be scarred for life. It's a pretty depressing and gross book. Ellen Hopkins novels are the same. Just a warning :)

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hello im 18/f and i've had my current job for about 2 years now. I just cannot seem to save money though. I have a car and its paid off. I couldnt save money so my mother created a new bank account to help me that way i couldnt take any money out which i needed for insurance. But thats just for insurance. I dont want to have to rely on her to help me. I do eat out alot and spend my money and things that are worthless, i just cant seem to save. I think to myself oh its just $5 or whatever the price may be and i buy it. Being in college now, even though im living at home, im finding it hard to pay for things. Can anybody give me any advice on how i can still have access to my money, but not be so tempted to spend it?

Thanks
Ashley

You have a job, and that's a great start.(One up on me anyway!) So be proud of yourself for that. The first thing you need to do is realize that these "five dollars here" and "fifteen dollars there" really start to add up. That's probably what is hurting you most. So limit your going out to eat time to 1 or 2 times every two weeks, and don't exceed it. Also give yourself a set amount of money to spend on leisure activities, and don't let yourself go over it.

You didn't specify what kind of bank account you have (checking or savings) so I am going to assume it's checkings. If you don't have both, get both. Sign up for a debit card, but remember to be responsible with it (don't overdraft). Keep up with how much is on your card, and that will be a good way to have access to the money on your account. Have your insurance money come out of your checking account.

Let's say you make 200 dollars every 2 weeks at your job. Take 100 dollars and put it in checkings, take 50 and put it in savings, and take the other 50 to keep with you for the 2 weeks. Take all the money you need out of checkings (being sure to keep enough for your insurance) and don't touch your savings. You'll be surprised about how much you will save.

If it's too hard for you to put money in an account you won't touch, you can sign up for a program through your bank that automatically takes out a percentage of how much you make on your paycheck and puts it in savings. That way you save money without even realizing it.

You will be able to access your savings account whenever you want for emergencies, but if you have 2 accounts and tell yourself you aren't allowed to get into your savings, you are more likely to save money.

Good luck!

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I am a virgin and not by choice. I'm 17 years old, almost 18 and I can not have sex. I am extremely tight down there. When a guy fingers me or I finger myself, I can only fit one finger in. When a guy does it, it kinda hurts since his finger is bigger than mine. I've tried having sex but it won't fit at all. It even hurts him. I can't even get two fingers in. Is there something wrong with me? What should I do?

There is nothing wrong with you. First of all, every girl is made different. Some are wide-set, while others (like you) are tight-set. That doesn't mean you cannot have sex, it just means it may be a little more difficult for you then someone else.

When you have sex, you must be completely relaxed. If you are even a little tense, most likely you won't be able to get anything up there. So completely relax yourself, and make sure you are well lubricated. If need be, buy some. A little bottle is cheap, so it would be about the same as buying a box of condoms.

That should solve your problem.

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i hav a 16 yrold daughter who has been living with me for 2 mth,and she tells me last nite she is 5 months preg.she is a below average student,with out a plan for the future.she wants to keep the baby and i am against it,i have told her my reason.i also told her she cant live with me with a baby.was i to hard on her?

Yes, you are being to hard. This is your child you are talking about and regardless of her grades, you should support her and let her know YOU think she's the greatest thing in the world. What motivation does she have to get good grades or want a good future when her mother's reaction to her is, "She's a below average student without a plan for the future" ??

One thing you must keep in mind is that having a child changes people. You may think she is a below average person, but having a baby is the best motivation in the world. Talk to her, and tell her how you feel. Legally speaking, you can't kick her out (she's too young) and you can't force her to have an abortion (she's too far a long and it's her choice). So talking to her is your only option. Until she is eighteen you are legally responsible for her.

If you honestly don't want her to have the baby, you can discuss adoption with her. Other than keeping the baby, that's pretty much your only option. But hear her out if she wants to keep it. Tell her she HAS to get a job, she HAS to support it, and she HAS to get her life on track. If you still don't want her living with you when she's eighteen, it's your option to kick her and her baby out. But why be hostile? This is the situation you are presented with, so you must make the best of it.

I'm sure hearing that your baby is pregnant is a big shock, and i'm sure it made you say things you didn't mean. Obviously you feel you were too harsh, or you wouldn't be questioning what you said to her now. So just talk to her and discuss the situation calmly and rationally. Good luck!

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So yesterday (sunday) my sister had plans to go to her boyfriends house for a bbq. (16f) My mom bought an apple pie and a cute small pot of flowers (yellow) for her to bring. She flipped out saying its so stupid and nobody does that, and all her friends say its dumb and "gay." I thought it was a really good idea. Anyway she was late, and almost didnt go because she got into a huge argument over it with my parents and refused to take them. She wasnt even going to call her boyfriend to tell him she couldnt go. We even tried to get her to just bring the apple pie. My mom ended up bringing it when she dropped my sister off, but it was almost such a waste, we bought two apple pies one for us and one for them so it wasnt like we could just eat it.
Opinions? thanks. and help.

Like someone else said, at her age things that may seem polite and expected to you may seem out of this world and embarrassing to her. Instead of getting upset, try talking to her about what happened. Ask why she didn't want to bring the gifts and hear her out before accusing her of being unreasonable. Then explain to her why you thought she should have brought the gifts. Let her know that even though her generation may see that as strange or outdated, his parent's generation would see it as a very nice gesture. Then explain to her how important it is to have the blessing of her boyfriend's parents and next time, that would be a good way to do it.

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I recently started my freshman year at college and i'm having trouble making friends. I know some people but they are on a different floor and i don't know them well enough to just be dropping in all the time- and since there are a bunch of them on that floor they are always going out together. And the floor i am on doesn't have that great of a group of girls. I have a really good roomate but thats about it. And i can't just be wandering into other dorms hahah.

How can I make some friends without seeming like a stalker?

I just started college, and I was extremely nervous about being by myself the whole time. In high school, I had a very select group of friends that I was with all the time, so I didn't really know how to make friends. It came easier then I thought it would though. You just have to put yourself out there, and be friendly. I have always been friendly, but being shy is my downfall. I just put that behind me though, and talked to as many people as I could. I have only been to college about 5 times (I drive from home) and I have made a friend almost every one of those days. The first day was hard, but after that it was easy.

Before class, talk to someone you sit beside of. Ask them what they think about the class, what they are majoring in, where they are from, etc. Those are always good topics to start with. They will usually lead to conversation. Try introducing yourself to at least one person in every class.

Have you considered joining a club or group? I want to be a teacher, and my college has this organization called Americorps and the members go to all the different elementary schools in the area to teach younger children how to read. I plan on doing it next year. If your college has some kind of organization that is germane to your major, consider joining it. That would be an amazing way to make friends with people you have something in common with. If not, join the student government, newspaper, or other organization that you feel may interest you.

You said you like your roommate, and that's a great start. Ask her to introduce you to all of her friends, and you can introduce her to yours. If you like your roommate, you'll more than likely enjoy her friends' company as well.

Don't worry about people thinking you are a stalker. College is different than high school from what I can tell. In high school, if you walked up to a group of girls and tried to introduce yourself, they would probably think you were a loser. But in college, that most likely won't happen. Of course there are probably some girls that haven't grown up and still act immature and petty, but the majority won't be like that.

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Forgive me this is a bit long but please listen..

I have a friend who is 7 weeks pregnant, We have been friends for 13 years. She is not married, Lives at home with her parents and is always asking me for money to help with her gas or too pay for her when we go out.

Since she told me she was exspecting her first child which was about 4 days ago, I have not wanted anything to do with her only because she is not ready to have a child and I am not happy with the decision of her keeping it..However it is her life and she is 23 years old and old enough to make her own choices. Before I found out she was pregnant I have not talked to her in some time because she hasn't been the best of friend to me for a few months now she has lied to me, betrayed me and even talked badly about me behind my back. I know for a fact if I continue to be friends with her all I am going to hear is how she is exspecting this baby etc.. and I frankly don't really want to hear it as I have my own issues and problems in life. I do not know how to tell her I no longer wish to be her friend and I think we should part ways, I don't want to come across as shallow but I have my reasons for not wanting contact with her she is also the type of person where I need to be straight forward with her to get the point across.

It's rude of you to judge her and say she isn't ready to have a baby. Like you said, it's her life so let her make her own decisions and don't chastize her for it. It really doesn't matter if you are not happy with her decision, because it's not your decision to make. And you would be suprised about how quickly a baby MAKES you grow up, whether you are ready for it or not.

Anyways, if you don't want to be friends with her, then don't be. You don't have to call her up and say, "Hey, I don't like you anymore, so I don't think we should hang out." Just decline her offers to hang out, and gradually stop answering her phone calls. It's that simple. You all aren't children, you are adults. So start acting like one. :)

...And I did read what you wrote. That doesn't change my answer in any way, shape, or form.

I was rated a 1


17/f
I'm in a bitt of a tough situation...I met this guy and he's absolutely the greatest sweetest person I've ever met.. We started out just talking and soon it became more than just talking.. But my problem is he's leaving to college in two weeks =(..I mean the college is only a train stop away but he's dorming there ..I guess my question is ...what are the chances this relationship is going to work out? I mean isn't he going to be too busy to be in a relationship? And college means parties and new girls =/...I have talked about this to him and he tells me not to worry but its hard..I really like this guy and I'd hate if this didn't work out...help?!

The odds are against you, but that doesn't mean it can't work. My boyfriend went to college for 2 years while I was in high school, and we are still together. I am in college now, and I don't see us breaking up over it. Neither of us stay on campus though. However I have a friend who's boyfriend went to college last year, and he's staying in a dorm. They are still together, but their relationship is much more strained then it used to be.

You will have to be open-minded and willing to accept the fact that you probably won't see him nearly as much as you used to. Studying is most likely going to take up a huuuge portion of his time. Plus parties, extra curriculars, etc. and the time you spend together is going to be limited. You also have to have a lot of trust in each other. If you don't, the relationship doesn't stand a chance.

Good luck!

I was rated a


I'm going into my senior year and I got my license in June, so I've been driving a lot over the summer. I have a car (well, technically, it's not my car it's "my parents' for me to use." I've been taking the bus every year of high school. I've honestly never known any seniors who took the bus to school, actually I knew one but she didn't have a car or people she could go with. I really really wanna drive myself to school senior year. I told my parents I would pay for all of the gas and they said no and that I would have to take the bus. I'm so freakin sick of the bus and I hate the fact that all my friends are gonna be driving to school and I'm gonna be the only idiot senior taking the bus when I HAVE A FREAKIN CAR. Should I see if I can carpool with any of my friends and maybe that will get them to let me. Uggh, it's so annoying, my parents don't understand high school life at all.

Talk to your parents like an adult. Explain to them that you feel confident enough in your driving to get yourself to school and back, and you promise to hold all responsibility when it comes to gas. Tell them what a safe driver you are (bc if you aren't you have no busines driving yourself anyways) and prove it to them by not getting any tickets or getting in any car accidents.

You may also want to explain to them that you will be out of school next year, and if you are going to college, then there's probably not a bus you can take. So it's better to get the experience now. You may talk to them about carpooling with a friend, but I wouldn't recommend it. When friends get behind the wheel together, they sometimes get careless. And plus, unless your friends are super responsible you can't trust them to get you to school on time. They may resent it as well. They are paying for the gas, the wear and tear on the vehicle, plus they have to get up earlier to come pick you up. So I wouldn't if I were you. :)

I was rated a


My tampon is stuck.
and i put another one up there.
and now it hurts.
what should i do.

If this just happened, you can try to take them out yourself. The first one should be easy to reach. Pull it out like you would any other tampon. The second one is obviously pretty far up there, but if you spread your legs wide and relax, you might be able to pull it out. Just don't panic. Your vagina only goes up so far. It's not lost forever ;)

The other columnists are right though. If you leave this problem as is, then you are at risk for TSS. So go to the doctor ASAP. Don't be embarrassed. Something like that happens to everyone at least once. :)

I was rated a


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