Bio♥


Hey, I'm Melody! I've been giving advice on and off since 2003. I'm a 23 year old military wife, expecting a baby boy in August, and working on my Bachelor's degree. :)

Oh, and ask me anything!

Advice

im 17/f. so i've been in a relationship for a year and i just got out of it like a few weeks ago...i went to a college party last night and i started hooking up with this really hott guy but i felt so dirty and slutty so i stopped and told him that i couldn't do this. when i was with my boyfriend i was like a sex maniac haha but i never felt slutty at all because we had that really strong connection you know? i thought being single and meeting guys and hooking up is suppose to be fun? i don't understand. i'm young and i'm suppose to like this....i guess all i want is someone who cares...idk what should i do...

like if thats what college is like then i'm not that excited..i don't just want to be another pointless girl he's hooked up with...i want to mean something.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with that whatsoever. In fact it's a very good thing. One night stands are okay for some people and for others they aren't. It's all a matter of opinion. If you only want to have meaningful sex then that's great. That's who you are, and it's a very respectable trait to have. College is about many things. Just because you aren't hooking up with guys doesn't mean you won't make any other relationships. I am in college and have not been to one party. It's not my thing, but I am loving life and college. You will too. :)

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My friend and I are having a fight with our other friend.
Friend A is boy
Friend B is a girl
I am the third friend.
friend A likes friend B more than just friends. but friend A claims to be bisexual. friend B does NOT like friend A. friend B says that she like likes friend A but he doesn't know that she doesn't like him anymore.
they never told me about this until a little but ago and this has been going on for about two years now. Friend B told me. Friend A is pretending that nothing is going on.
How can i deal with friend B who has lied to me but came clean?
how do i remain friends with friend A and still be mad at him ?
please help!?

This question makes no sense. For future reference, friend A, friend B, friend C is not a very columnist friendly question. I would love to help you, but I would advise you to ask this question again, with pseudo-names instead of letters. :)

If you want, you can send one to my inbox too so I can find it right away and answer it for you.

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okay, im 15 my cousin is 17. we have been around eachother when we were kids, and i guess you could say we have 'ecperimented' but we were only 3 and 5 so idt that counts. Well we grew up a lot after that. he ended up dropping out of school and hookin up wid all these sluts. i feel he is just a good part of the family (honestly, i dont have feelings like that for him). i get along with his gf's wen they r over. but he kept telling me to send him a dirty pic tonight. i said no. so he sends me one of his man junk. oh i wanted to throw up. that made me so freaking mad. he told me he wanted one because he has always kinda liked me. well i told him if he liked me then he wouldnt force me to send something i dont want and will never send. wat should i do? im not going to tell him tha i dont like him and i like im as just part of the family now cuz im pissed at him... maybe later i will. but how would you feel if his happened. and wat should i do?

Be very clear to him that you love him in one way, and one way only; As a family member. Tell him that you think he's confused, make sure to repeat over and over again that you are his cousin. That's sick. That's unnatural. That's not right. If he persists, tell your parents.

I am afraid you are confused as well. It sounds to me like you are afraid you have feelings for him, but you also know it's not right. It's okay to find him attractive. That does not mean you should pursue any relationship with him whatsoever outside of a family one. Don't forget that.

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Hi, my moms some sort of an alcoholic. Well, the other day my dad and i went to go buy a fake christmas tree that was very costy because we wanted one that looked real. Well, (my parents dont talk to each other because of my mothers behavior) i asked her last night if i could put the tree up. She said what tree? i said my father and i purchased a tree in sears, since we all have new cars and don't want to scratch them, we cant go pick up one. she freaked out telling me to tell my dad to return it, were not celebrating christmas or my 17th birthday this year (dec 22). i calmly asked "why?", she said my sister (21) said not to. So I called her out saying that is bullshit because my sister called me crying saying my mother said were not celebrating christmas this year. I called my sister, put her on speaker and said "why is mom saying your the one who told her not to celebrate christmas" melissa said "mom said...... what....!?" "Mom said you told her not to celebrate christmas" she said "why is she blaming me?!" i said "i dont know what her deal is but shes being a little bitch, and i have you on speaker right now in front of her and she is just embarrassed for lying to me." my sister said "i cant believe you mom, what the fuck" and i hung up.
So, me having temper problems i started screaming at her (i cant help it, i swear). i started throwing things and i took her alcohol and hid it for all of our sake. she opens the fridge for a beer and screams "GOD DAMNIT WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU PUT MY BEER?!?!!!?" she pushed me against the wall and started searching the entire house, not sure if she found it or not. She said "im calling the police on you to take you away". she locked me out of the house while i am sick, in 25 degree weather, snowing. i texted my friend to come get me and she did. so basically i just left my house without letting her know, nothing new there.
this christmas will be really embarrassing because my sisters boyfriend from england (they want to get married) is staying with us from the 21st-jan 8th. and if he sees that my mother isnt allowing us to celebrate my birthday, christmas eve, and christmas day, he'll think differently of us. my moms never been like this before. but every christmas she refuses to open presents with the entire family. she seperates my fathers presents from hers. she makes my sister and i sit in the kitchen while opening her presents, not our living room with the tree. then, after we open all of them, we go to my father. in his office to open his presents. my dads upset that my mom wont allow us to open presents as a family. but, whatever. its something that i cant change i guess..
i called my boyfriend (19) crying telling him what happened. he said that i can come to his grandparents christmas eve celebration in long island (i live in ny) his mother already said i was welcome. and his dads christmas celebration at his grandparents house on christmas day. welll, i never met ryans grandparents/side of the family in long island. i think that would be weird if i did go, they would ask me why im not with my family. i will get upset, and start crying over it. and his dad is an asshole and just calls everyone out on every little mistake so he would make me tell what happened to his entire family on christmas day. another thing that would make me upset. (theres nothing to control his dads behavior, unless if he is on medication)
i am supossed to go to my grandmothers house in ct for christmas eve like every year, excluding my mother. i really want to meet ryans extended family on that side but i dont want to have to tell them about my mothers behaviors.. i think it would be a little weird for me to be there considering he has cousins my age (16, almost 17.. will be 17 at the time) uncles, aunts, family friends, & whoever else.
i really need help. i dont know what to do, this is one huge clusterfuck.
i dont want to go home. if i do, im going to throw another fit. but my dad will be home tonight to help out if i do... what should i do about this? please keep in mind that i have huge temper/emotional problems..
thank you in advance for reading this, all help is appreciated.

First of all you need to learn to control your temper. Blowing everything out of proportion and using foul language is not going to solve anything, ever. Talk to your mom calmly and explain to her that she really hurt your feelings. Tell her you understand that she obviously does not want to celebrate Christmas, but you do not understand why. Then ask her to explain it to you. Did you ever think maybe the Christmas season stresses her out? All the hype about getting presents is enough to send any parent over the edge, especially in such a tough economy. Make sure she knows you don't just care about the presents. Tell her it means a lot to you just being with your family and that is why Christmas is so important to you.

If she just does not understand, consider spending Christmas with your boyfriend. None of his faimly has to know why you are staying with him. If his father asks, just say you really wanted to meet Ryan's extended family and since your family was not having any big celebration this year, you thought it was the perfect time. Leave it at that. You do not owe them an explanation. Tell your grandparents the same thing.

Good luck :)

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My computer doesn't have the ability to open zip files, so what's a free download I can use that WONT give me any spam or viruses?
Also, how would I use it?

I need something to open zip files of Custon Content I download for The Sims 3.

I have personally used winrar for that exact reason. It works, it's free, and I have found myself using it for more than just custom content for the Sims.

modthesims2.com has free tutorials and if I am not mistaking, a place you can download winrar from. That is the download they suggest you use. Downloading the content is confusing at first, but after you figure it out and do it a few times, it becomes easy. If you hit a snag while trying to get the content to work, inbox me and I will do my best to help walk you through it.

Be careful though. Having such a wide array of content to choose from can be really addicting, and if you download more pixels than your computer can handle it will crash. Trust me! I learned from personal experience, and have been forbidden by my folks to download anymore content for my game. :(

Just let me know if you need help!

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http://www.windsorstore.com/shop_detail.aspx?id=90170&lcid=835

where could i get a dress like that cheaper? under $50 would be great! thankss =]

Forever21 has already been mentioned, but that would be an excellent place to look. Also check out Charlotte Russe. They have a website, and I found a few dresses that were very similiar.

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I've been taking YAZ for about 2 years now and I haven't had any bad side effects. However, reading about the lawsuits against YAZ and it's possible side effects scares me.
What other brands of birth control pills are good?

I am on YAZ too and completely understand where you are coming from. I don't think it's anything you need to be so concerned about that you are willing to switch your birth control though. Your pills come with a pamphlet that clearly discusses all the possible side effects that go along with taking the pill. However if you don't smoke or have any serious health conditions and you haven't had any side effects yet, you will more than likely be fine. Discuss this with your doctor since it concerns you so much. It should put your mind at ease. :)

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well my boyfriend and i have been getting very serious about our relationship. and my "cherry" hasnt been popped. but he suck it in without a condom....but what i was wondering was do you think even though my cherry has not been popped (atleast i dont think so because i havent bled like everyone says you do) something could happen?

If your boyfriend stuck his penis inside of you, then you no longer have a hymen, or in other words a cherry. Just because you didn't bleed doesn't mean your hymen didn't rip. A lot of girls don't bleed. Yes, you can be pregnant. But no, you probably aren't. I wouldn't worry about it unless you miss your period. You are fine. Don't stress out.

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Okay so there's a boy i REALLY like and he's said i'm pretty. I need tips to look great. See at my school you're barely allowed any make-up so i need to look naturally beautiful. HELP!

He obviously already thinks you look great, so there is no need to change yourself. :) But if you want you can 'enhance' your natural beauty.

The trick to that is to keep your skin healthy. Wash your face daily, and use an exfoliate scrub once a week. I like St. Ives because it's inexpensive and works very well. Keep it moisturized as well.

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i'm in major depression,i've seen all the doctors i can afford,if you have any advice,please help me.

Depression isn't something you can just get advised out of. You will eventually be okay though, as long as you stay strong. I was diagnosed with clincial depression and anxiety about four years ago. Whether or not I really had that, I dont know. All I know is that I was super sad all the time, and had a "fuck the world" kind of attitude. If you want my personal opinion, I think I was just at an awkward stage in my life, and I didn't have the ability to deal with normal teenage problems like I should have.

Anyways, I went to councelors, psychiatrists, all of that. I don't think any of it helped. I refused to talk to any of them, and eventually I was medicated. The medicine did not help me (maybe it helps others, I don't know) but I felt the same as I did before. I told others I felt better, so eventually I didn't have to take it anymore. I got better on my own. I am not advising you to do that, if medicine helps you then by all means, take it. But it just didn't work on me.

What I did was count my blessings. I told myself that instead of fucking the world, I was going to fuck the bad stuff. Revel in the good things in your life. I had my health, my family, school, I was much luckier than I thought it was. You are too. Even if everything in your life seems terrible, you still have life. That's all you need.

Get out there and do something! Meet some new people, take up a new hobby, whatever. If you need to talk to someone, you can always inbox me. I'll get a response to you as fast as I can.

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17-f

For the past 2 years or so i have been having breast pains and pains in my armpit and neck/under my jaw area. They are random pains and not easy to ignore. I have the pain daily not always at once but today i have been feeling it going all through that area all on my right side too. Everytime i breath all of those spots hurt especially my breast & armpit. I have no idea what the pain is from and have been to a doctor and they didn't even attempt to figure out what it was. Any ideas on what it could be?

It sounds like you are having a problem with your lymph nodes. I do not know that for a fact, but from what you have described and from what I found off of webMD, that's what it appears to be. However lymph nodes shoul dnever be painful, just swollen.

You need to go to another doctor if the one you have already been to didn't help you. Tell the doctor that your last one didn't help you, and that the pain has been getting worse. It's VITAL that you go to the doctor as soon as possible.

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How was Nikki Reed discovered? Please state the source you got the information from. Thankyou;)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikki_Reed

That has some really good information.

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Sorry if this is in wrong thing.

Ok lately this year i've been txting or aim some girls and they all say im annoying and i need to leave them alone. This one girl said she would give me a 2nd chance and i sorta liked her so i tried i guess to be less annoying or whatever it seems that i do. So she doesn't txt or anything and so i haven't been txting her lately or aiming her. Then tonight i said hey whats up and she flipped out. This other girl i know that is friends with her has done the same thing so what do i do wrong?

Forget them. Their names are probably under the definition of bitch. What is the point of liking a girl when she doesn't even want you speaking to her? I don't see a future relationship brewing there. Find a nice girl who enjoys your company. This girl is just playing with your heart...or she just really sucks at playing hard to get. :)

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ok so i was watching tv the other day and there was the 'ab circle pro' and i was reading a few reviews online and the majority of them said that it was poor quality. does anyone here have one? what do you think of it.
and i was also looking at a thing on the internet that said if you stick a broom or something over your shoulders and turn your abs without moving your hips helps alot.
has anyone tried that and thought that it worked?
and lastly, what are some other types of workouts that are easy and work well to get toned abs.
sit ups hurt my back alot so i dont really want to be doing them. but i will if i have to.
thanks.
oh and next year i might be joining a trampolining club so that would work too wouldnt it?

You can do crunches and sit-ups and buy all of the commerical ab machines on tv, but if your muscles are covered up with a layer of cellulite it won't do a bit of good. You need to focus on cardio before worrying about toning your muscles.

Joining the trampoline club will help you tremendously because it's a great way to get a cardio work out.

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i'm 15 years old/female.

and i have terrible breakouts.
i have post-marks from them too..
i know that teens are supposed to break out a little bit,it's part of puberty, but i want to keep it under control.

here's my current skin routine:
i only was my face once a day, night time, and it's in the shower. i use avons professional skin care face cleanser.
after that i use the lotion, ( i'm currently out of the toner pads that come with the set) and then i use the Neutrogena spot treatment.it says that it will visably reduce the sign of acne and post-acne marks in 8 hours. it dosent really seem to work though..but i read that it may take three weeks.
i used to have REALLY bad acne, i would have three or four on each side of my face, on my fourhead, my chin, and some on my nose. and they would be HUGE. and they would HURT. baddd.
i would get heachaches from them. and when i went over them with makeup, they would just hurt even more.
so after that, i started using proactiv, but i got imune to it, i guess. haha.

i've been trying to clear my breakouts up again, but it dosent really seem to be working.
i heard that if you wash with warm water, adn rinse with cold water, then that helps alot.
and would it help if i boiled hot water, let my face over it, and the steam would like clean out my poors though?

if anyone has any suggestions, or tips, they would be greatly appreciated. (:

I would also vote for the Clinique 3-step system. It's a little expensive, but it's worth it. Try not to mix products when you can. Mixing them can make your skin worse. It sounds to me like you have a pretty good skin care routine though, so if your face is still giving you problems you should consider visiting a dermatologist. They will be able to customize a skin care regimen just for you, and they may put you on birth control to regulate your hormones.

Good luck! :)

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okay, im a nineteen year old female and i really want a baby. im NOT old enough, and i know im not ready, but i cant help wanting one. there is no way that i will have one right now, because i dont want to hurt the chances of my child's future, so i WIll wait to have a child. i was just wondering if anyone has ever felt the same excitement for motherhood so young, like me. and, if you have, i was wondering how you deal with it, because its been making me sad lately.

I am an 18 year old female and I feel the exact same way. It scares my boyfriend to death, but I think he is beginning to understand that I can't help the way I feel. Like you, I would never try to get pregnant right now but the urge doesn't just go away.

One thing that helps me is talking to my boyfriend. It's scary, but we've been together long enough to where if I can't express ALL of my emotions to him, then we have no business being together. He is definitely not ready for kids and he has no problem expressing that to me, however he's very understanding and talking about our future, how we will raise our kids, etc. really helps but the baby mania off at least for a little while.

You already seem to do this, however thinking about what's best for your future babies helps too. Think about how much better off you and your baby will be when you have a home, a career, and a stable marriage/relationship. Then make it a point to do well in college if you are going and/or focus on making your career plans. :)

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I have to go into the hospital and they are going to put an IV in my arm. How bad does this hurt?

Has anyone had an IV before?

I am not going to say it feels good, but it's not as bad as you think. Just don't watch, and as long as a doctor or nurse knows what they are doing, it will be over before you know it.

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how do you deal with people that constantly need/want attention. Not in a desperate way but people that always like to be the center of attention and talk a lot and always need to have everyone listen to them? i am pretty but i dont talk about it or emphasize it so much but I do have this new friend who is really pretty too and she just likes all this attentions and is always getting it and talking about herself and stuff. idk how to deal with it???

Some people just have a big personality, and in return they receive a lot of attention for it. Honestly, she probably doesn't even realize she's doing it.

If she's a new friend and you don't like her personality, then consider hanging out with other people that you do like. That may seem kind of harsh to a lot of people, but if there is someone in my life that makes me unhappy I am not going to continue being around them. After some of the things I have put up with in the past I have finally come to the conclusion that I don't need anyone in my life who is going to make me any less than happy.

If you do like her company regardless of this problem, try addressing the situation. You have to be careful though because you do not want to come across as bitchy or jealous of the attention she receives. If she always talks about herself say something like, "As much as I enjoy talking about the things going on in your life, I thought maybe we could talk about...blah blah blah" That way you aren't personally attacking her, but you are stating the problem and trying to resolve it.

Unfortunately there isn't anything you can do about her receiving attention. You can't chastise her for being popular or well liked. Join in on the conversation and try not to be so meek, even if you do have a shy personality. Throw yourself out there, and maybe you will receive some attention as well. :)

Good luck.

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So when i told my stylist that i wanted to grow my hair out, she told me that i should still be getting it cut every month. She does a good job with my hair and all but i feel like she's just trying to get more money for me. If hair grows from the roots then I dont understand why getting it cut more regularly would help it grow faster. Can someone please explain this to me. Also, any other tips to help me grow out my hair would be much appreciated.

I thought up until very recently that in order for hair to grow out quicker, a regular trim was neccessary. According to Cosmopolitan magazine though, it's just a myth. Getting your hair trimmed every month is not going to help your hair grow faster, but it is essential to keeping your hair healthier looking. Split ends do not just go away, they will continue splitting up until your hair is completely damaged, so you should still get a regular trim. I doubt you would need to do so once a month, but once every few months would be ideal.

You cannot make your hair grow noticebly faster, but there are a few things you can do to aid the process; start taking the vitamin called "skin, hair, and nails" This keeps your skin vibrant, your nails strong, and apparently helps your hair grow faster. I have no idea if that's true, but I have heard it helps. Regardless it will keep your hair healthy, and that is always a plus. :)

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so i have to columns of data in excel that goes for like two pages. Is there a way to make it add the two columns of each row together in one step?

Highlight both columns that have your data plus the following column you want your answers to be in and hit the arithmetic button in the top right hand of the page. If that doesn't work, add the first row together, and then drag the little bold section in the right hand corner of the box with your answer in it all the way to the last row of data.

Hope that helps. :)

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