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I'm SarahI cheer (it's my life)
I model
I will be attending Yale, Wharton, or Brown in 2010.
I'm not a bad kid.
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I'm not sure what's wrong with me, and wheather it's paranoia, or OCD, or something else. This is really hard to explain but i'll try my best.
In my head while i'm doing something, i'll make like, a 'bet' with myself. Like I have to do something or else i'll die. It's about really stupid thing, too, but it's just become a habit ie: You have to fast forward through the opening credits of this tv show, otherwise you'll die. I found a way to kind of 'derail' it, by instead of saying,"Otherwise you'll die," saying something like, "otherwise beyonce will gain a pound," But now saying that has because an obsession. I used to do something kind of like that, but with music videos on MTV. And whatever music video I saw last before I went to bed I thought would be a representation of the next day. Sometimes I would stay up for an extra hour because I was so paranoid that if i saw a video like, 'It end tonight' I would die. I've developed this stupid habit of looking at the clock and creatingf math problems. If it were 1:01 i'd say to myself, "Addition," and "Subtraction,"(because one plus one is zero and same goes for minusing). I'd also do things like that for multiplication and division. And it's become obsessive. Like every time I look at the clock I HAVE to name a math problem, or else somthing bad will happen.
Lastly, I have this nervous tick where i'll count out the sylables to everything on my hand really quickly. And for some reason it has to either be ten or five sylables. And since th phrase,"otherwise beyonce will gain a pound," is ten slables, i find myself almost always involintarily counting out sylables.
(I don't have an obsessionover beyonce, or anything, I just said it once and it stuck)
What on earth is wrong with me? And what can I do to just be NORMAL? Please help me
i was actually really surprised when i read this because i used to do the EXACT same things, especiallly the clock thing. i had it really bad though, it would take over my life and i couldnt hardly function because i couldnt stop thinking about weird little things like that. i got tested and i had OCD. it wasnt that big of a deal i just went to a schycologist and talked to him. it sounds like that might be what you have. its nothing to freak out about though, i got prescribed some medication that eased my mind and made me stop being paranoid. my life was so much easier once i got the medicine. my advice would be to talk to someone about it because it sounds like you have OCD. i hope that i helped
(Rating: 5) thank you so much