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I can't gurantee that my advice will always be right. And some things I might not even know. But I will do my best to answer any questions :] I'll tell you exactly what i think, so if you don't like it, dont read it!And lately, i've discovered that one of the best answers for relationship problems is communication. talk. explain. share. it does wonders.
advice
My 12 year old son has been bullied by a boy in our neighborhood for several years now. My son has a lot of friends, but of course all his friends are around his age and scared of the bully.
The bully (Gary) is 15. A few years ago my husband and I talked to Gary's parents, because he stole a toy from my son on the school bus. Gary claimed not to have the toy, and his parents protected him--and said we were in the wrong. This only child is perfect according to them. I have given up on going to the parents. The attitude of the police is "boys will be boys" (we live in a small town).
I caught Gary in the act a couple of weeks ago. He jumped on, and broke a ramp that my son and his friends built for their bikes. I told him he was acting like a 6 year old, and that someday someone bigger and meaner will come along and "take him out". He rode off on his bike in a hurry! However now he harasses my son about telling "Mommy". Last night he threw big rocks at my son's bike, causing some damage to paint. Apparently it even makes things worse if I interfear. Usually I do leave it to my son to settle disagreements, but this boy has crossed the line.
My 21 year old son, is 6'4, 240 lbs but If I use him to intimidate the 15 year old, this would be no different than a 15 year old picking on a 12 year old. Although...I doubt Gary has paid much attention to big brother. He'd probably be scared of him, we all know Gary is a coward in disguise.
My son does not want to walk away, because this means he would have to leave his other friends behind, plus he wants to "look tough" Any tips on dealing with a neighborhood bully?
the simple answer would be to fight back. and it doesn't have to be physically either. Tactics and strategies come into play here. The saying 'safety in numbers' come to play in here. If your son and his friends make sure there are at least two people together at one time, it would be harder for the bully to pick on, right? Also, your son should try standing up to the bully and even though standing up might lead to worse results, it doesnt hurt to try right?
if my advice was really bad, here are some websites that might help:
http://www.kidshealth.org/kid/feeling/emotion/bullies.html
http://www.ncpamd.com/Bullies.htm
http://www.safechild.org/bullies.htm
these are just some... if you want to find more, you can go to google.com and type in 'dealing with bullies'.
hope i helped!
im not really sure my boyfriend likes me. there is a 3 year age difference. and he thinks i dont trust him. what should i do??
talk to him. ask him why he doesnt trust you and try to work things out. if he says he doesnt trust you because he thinks you flirt too much with other guys (just a random example), then you should stop doing and promise him you wont do it anymore, etc. As for whether or not he really likes you, you'll have to see for yourself in his actions though he sounds somewhat jealous if he doesnt trust you... but anyway, hope i helped. if you have anymore problems feel free to leave me a message!
Well my brothers girlfriend is like, a total whore. And I'm not just saying that. I have a really strong hunch that she also likes my brothers best friend. (Whom I like, but that means nothing.) The other day, he was here, and she came over, even though my brother was sleeping. Then she went out to get ice cream with him, and didn't ask my brother to go. THEN, she asked him to visit her when she goes on vacation, and not my brother. I realize that this shouldn't be any of my business, but I find it ridiculous that he's still with her when she's already cheated on him once. Plus, my older brother who's 9 years older than me told me that he heard some stuff about her from some people that he didn't like too much, and he'd have to have a talk with the other brother. I know they must have had that talk by now, and I know that he looks up to him, but they still haven't broken up. Even if she is on vacation. Really, I just don't know what to do. I need help. I hate the girl and I don't want to kill her, so I need ways to:
1) Not kill her.
2) Get my brother to break up with her.
Once a cheater always a cheater.
Uh... you definitely don't want to kill her. it's a capital offense (or whatever it was)... you should definitely talk to your brother about it. Since you ARE his sister and you're looking out for him, he might listen to you. so it'll definitely be a good idea to tell him.
also, since your other brother already talked to him, he should be more inclined to do something about it since you also realized shes not as great as she seems and it's more than one person now. If your brother doesnt listen, you and your other brother should use peer pressure! But then again, you can always be so rude and annoying that she'll break up with him to get away from you... but that ought to be a last resort or something. :) hope i helped, if not, feel free to message me!
Is it more apropriate to tell a guy your home phnoe nummber or your cell phone number?
definitely your cell phone number because not only will it avoid awkward situations with your parents or siblings who might pick up the phone, he'll know it'll most likely be you picking up the phone when he calls.
I just saw the movie "Edward Scissorhands" with Johnny Depp and it was wonderful. For those who have seen it, I didn't get the end...when Kim as an old woman says "I don't know whether he's alive or not" and then they show Edward making an ice statue of her dancing in the snow, was she having a flashback, or was the film showing Edward at that moment she was talking?
the film was showing edward making the ice statue at the same time she was talking. it was kind of answering her implied question of wondering if he was alive or not... which was yes he is alive :)
so about two months ago i found out that my best friend basically was talking about me behind my back, so i told her off and we both got really pissed and just stopped talking. last week she apologized and it seemed like she meant it so i told her it was ok. so the other day she was at my house and she was on advicenators.com, and i guess she forgot to log out because today i came onto this site and clicked on "your questions" and saw that they werent mine so i was confused and i clicked on one. in it she basically bashed our whole group of six friends, she said only herself and my two other friends were pretty and she said one of them was only pretty "sometimes". then she continued to talk about another friend (who even though she used a different name, i could tell was me because she talked about the same stuff that she was using to talk about me behind my back) and how she thought that i COULD be pretty but im ugly right now and how can she help me. but she made it sound like im some person who doesnt know how to take care of myself, like i have no idea how to use a razor and i never wash my face so its all greasy, which is NOT true. i started shaving even before she did! and im not sure how i should react cause in one way its flattering that she cares about me enough to want to help me with my "problems", but in another way im insulted because she said that "no guys pay attention to her" which isnt true, a bunch of guys have specifically said that they thought im hot. and she said that i always wear the same clothes and that even when its really hot out ill wear jeans and a sweatshirt, but its really mean of her to assume that because she doesnt understand that im really self conscious cause shes like the skinniest person alive shes a size 00 and im a size 5, and she doesnt know that so she talks about how her friend who is a size 3 is fat to me. and when i first the question she wrote i was so mad at her, she was making all these rude accusations when she doesnt even know the truth. it makes me not wanna be friends with her anymore knowing that she thinks of me as like a little girl who doesnt know how to take care of herself and needs "help". but i cant confront her about it cause then she'll know i was snooping on her account, even though it was an accident. what do u think i should do to prove her wrong about all that? sorry this was so long. thanks!!!
Well, has she ever done it before to you? Has she ever talked about you behind your back before this incident? If she's done it before, then it would be a good idea to end the friendship since it seems like she wont be changing any time soon and will probably continue to stab you in the back in the near future.
But if this was her first time in being rude to you or making mean comments about you, then you ought to forgive her and remain friends with her. Because it could have been just a bad mistake she did and she didn't mean it. But if she does it again in the future, find yourself a new best friend who wont talk trash about you behind your back. i hope i helped :)
Okay, tonight, my mom got really mad at me. Like REALLY mad. And it was all over this stupid box of macaroni that she asked me to make for dinner. I read the instructions wrong, and thought that you had to let the water boil for 10 minutes before putting in the macaraoni. So anyway, she flipped out on me. And started screaming. And she slapped me twice. And i really wanted to hit her, but i didn't, i just grabbed her wrist's really hard. So she flipped out on me contiunously, and after i made dinner, she went on to say "i dont even like this crap anyway" and didn't eat all of it.
This isn't the first time she's done stuff like this and i dont know how to deal with it. what do i do?
Did you try talking to her? Maybe it's just a huge misunderstanding between you too? That's how my mom is with me sometimes, though it hasn't been over cooking macaroni yet. If talking to her doesnt work, try not to fight with her. Just do what she wants and until she's pleased, then dont deal with her after that. The best way is to talk to her and let her know how you feel, unless thats her nature, then you somehow get your mom to a psychiatrist (however you spell it). the worst thing to do is to fight or yell back (as i've learned) because it only makes things worse. i hope i helped at least somewhat and if you still need help, feel free to message me.
Okay…..^_^ this might take a while. Well, at camp, on the second day of the time we were there, Abby and I were sitting on a loveseat during this camp activity thing. Everyone was told that they had to sit in the middle, (which is where we were sitting) So, Mikey gets up from the back and looks around for a place to sit. He looks straight at me and sits down INBETWEEN me and abby. We are sitting there, and my heart was kinda pounding. Anyway, he starts to poke my leg…. and so of course I had to poke him back. So we went on like that for awhile. And then he laid his hand on my leg for like 5 seconds and smirked at me…. almost like a challenge…>.> so I had to do it back of course. So then, we went on like that forEVER and it was almost like the nervous game but I stopped. And then I elbowed him in the side, and it was funny!
Okay! NEXT DAY! WOOOOO…Okay, I was in crafts with abby and kirstie and Marissa. And Mikey was in Ping-Pong, which is in the same room. Then I finished my craft, and he had lost at ping-pong. I walked past him to go talk too abby and he stops me. He’s all….”sit on my lap” and I was all…O_O no! and then he was all…. Please? And I said, No, cause I’m not a slut. So he asked me to sit on the arm of the chair. So I did for like a minute. But then my butt started to ache so I got up and moved into the chair next to him. Then he started to show off, and he rocked back and forth in the chair he was sitting in, and flipped it backwards on purpose. He was sitting like that for a while, but then he was uncomfortable, cause he couldn’t get up. So he asked me to help him. So I tried…. for like 2 seconds, but got bored so I gave up. Then he was whining and whining and stuff. Then he stopped and looked at me and was all, “hold my hand…” And I was all “._.;;;;;” But I did, ^_^ and then he said that I had really soft hands which made me laugh. Then abby and kirstie helped him get the chair up, but he wouldn’t let go of my hand.
THEN, , we had swimming. I went down to the pool, but I didn’t know he was going to be there, and I didn’t want to swim cause I had my cloths on, and I had my period. BUT, he kept threating to push me in and I didn’t wanna get wet so I sat next to the lifeguard. The lifeguard was all, “If you touch her and push her in then I’ll get pushed in to and I WOULD NOT be happy…*glare*” (cause she was holding my hand so he couldn’t get me.) ^_^ Heehee, anyway, so he just stood over me and dripped water on me, and splashed me, AND HE WAS SHIRTLESS! …*Drool* but then I got bored so I wen’t and put my legs into the water in the shallow end with kirstie, and It was nice and we were sitting there and I was all ahhhhh. But of course, he had to come over. So he walks over in all his wet shirtless glory and is holding a Frisbee. He dips the Frisbee under that water and all the sudden splashes me. I sat there very quietly, and he said…”You can hit me if you want…” and I was all…”I’m not going to hit you…. *and then I jumped in the water fully clothed* I’M GOING TO KILL YOOOU!” Lets just say he ran away like a little girl, lol.
Then since my group was with his for the next activity which was ultimate Frisbee, he pretended to be sick and sat on the sidelines and watched kirstie and me. We were doing handstands and stuff and it was fun. After that, we were walking back past the rec hall, and he ran up out of no-where and just grabbed my hand. It was like…*Mikey appears out of no-where* *snatch’s hand* I got very scared, but I let him hold it! ^_^;;;, then some random kid was all, “Hey Mikey! Is that your new girlfriend!” and I looked at Mikey and went “EWWWWWWWWWWW” and walked away. ^_^ Heehee, oopsie? Then after that, there was just random flirting and him throwing stuff at me and being adorable, and stuff
Then when we got back home and stuff, kirstie randomly asked him why he kept hitting on me at camp, and he said its cause he likes me!
Okay,my quistion is, do you think he likes me, and i'm wondering if i should date him, cause he is in rehab right now....and after camp he made out with some other girl. WHAT SHOULD I DO!?!?!?!?!
he could be just flirting with you, but it seems like he likes you. If i were you, i'd be more careful, but ultimately it's your choice whether or not to date him. You also have to consider, do you like him too? If you like him and he likes you, then i think you should definitely go for it. But be careful anyway, since you said he made out with some other girl, he might end up cheating on you or something. so know what you're getting into.
Ok, here is my problem. I have a group of friends. We all were pretty cool with eachother until this year. One girl was acting annoying etc. etc. and making some huge mistakes. My other friends got made at her and talk about her everytime I come over because they are dissappointed and mad at her because she made mistakes, especially a huge one. I agree with them on some topics, but not on others. The friend who makes mistakes is still my friend...but sometimes she goes and makes a white lie to me every now and then and it makes me uncomfortable. I can not side with her or else I'll lose some of my good friends, but I cant side with them either because I do not agree with everything they are doing. I am being used and pestered by the annoying friend sometimes. I try to talk to her about it....but I never can say the things I want to say right. I need help! What should I do?
--Stuck in the Middle
i think, you should tell your friends when you dont agree with them. you could say like 'i agree with you about blah blah, but i think you're being a little unreasonable on blah blah'. something like that. you dont have to agree with everything they say. you can have your opinions about certain situations.
With your other friend, you should just be honest and straightforward with her. She might not want to hear it, but that's what friends are for right? being able to tell each other the truth in situations. i hope i helped at least somewhat and things work out for you.
i don't know if anyone is like awake now but...
i cannnnot fall asleep.
and i'm oh so tired. help.
i think its called insomnia? i'm not sure how anyone could help you with that...uh... you could take sleeping pills, i guess or try drinking a glass of warm milk?
these links might help:
http://clubs.calvin.edu/chimes/970110/f2011097.htm
http://www.43folders.com/2006/06/16/better-sleep/
http://www.accomplishlife.com/articles/624/1/Top-10-Drug-Free-Ways-to-Say-Good-Night-to-Insomnia
i hope i helped! I'm obviously not able to fall asleep since im posting on here at 1 am haha.
I want my boyfriend to take me out on a date but how do I make that happen? Last month was our anniversey. (a year being together) and he didn't take me anywhere. It seems like I only see him when I go to his school once a week. The weekends we don't do anything anymore. Some people told me to let him do what he wants and that I'm a clingy girlfriend..but I've been waiting for almost 6 months! He won't take me to one movie.. because he doesn't have a ride. What do I do?
talk to him about it. thats one of the most important things in a relationship, communicating essentially. If you think it might be too awkward or rude to confront him about not taking you out, then you'll have to be original and invite HIM out on a date. kind of strange, because normally a guy asks a girl, but you gotta get things moving! You've been going out for a year, what makes you stay with him even though he doesnt take you out on dates? Also remember, dates arent everything in a relationship.. an important aspect, i guess, but you have start things off by asking him 'hey want to catch a movie this weekend' or something, to indicate that you want to go on a date or hang out. If he claims he doesnt have a ride, have your parents or friends give you guys a ride.
hope i helped =) feel free to message me for any more help
I have a wonderful grandmother. She is the most kind, wise person I have ever met. She has 4 children, one of which is my father. Another one is named Tary. She is unemployed. She was married and had 3 kids (2 twins and a girl). Anyways, when her husband died, Tary had nowhere to live because she and her husband did nothing. So, my grandmother offered her to live with her. Not a good idea. They completely take advantage of her and I feel so sad for her. She's a pushover, and her back has been bad for years =(. I've told my cousins (Tary's children) how lucky they are to live in my grandmother's house, and they simply said, "It isn't her house. It's our house too." Tary doesn't pay my grandmother anything for food, bills, or gas.
My grandmother is slowly getting poorer. She lives in a bad neighborhood, so she sent the 3 kids of Tary to a private school. They all failed in it, though, so they have to go to public now. Also, Tary's twin boys' birthday was a week ago. One got a cell phone, and the other got an iPod, and they're both 13! They probably didn't even say thank you. =(
My dad and his other siblings have talked to my grandmother about it and she denies it all. If I bring it up, she'll be upset. I just don't like seeing her go through this.
What do I do?
if your grandmother wont do anything about it, your father and his other siblings should, since it'll only do her good [as far as i can tell]. Have you tried talking to tary? If she isnt willing to listen, then your father and other aunts/uncles will have to do something about it. Even if your grandmother gets upset if you bring it up, you have to sooner or later. tell her its for her own good and that you guys are all worried about her.
My boyfriend asked me to go to the movies with him today. The only problem is, when we got there, he got sick and ran into the bathroom and THREW UP !! YUK !!!! Then I just went into the movie and told his friend to have my boyfriend meet me in there. (cuz i didnt know he was even sick yet) He ended up going home without telling me OR CALLING ME !! how rude is that !? About an hour after the movie started he FINALLY called me and told me he got sick and threw up !! I left the movie early and went home.....for like HOURS I was crying in my room !! The most embarrassing part was that, when I got home, ALL MY BROTHERS 10TH GRADE FRIENDS where there, staring at me while I was crying my eyes out in front of them !! What should I do about my boyfriend !?
Kelly 13/f
It might have been that he was too embarrassed to tell you that he was sick/threw up. You shouldnt take this too hard unless this happens a lot. Try talking to your boyfriend and asking him why he didnt tell you sooner that he was sick. And let him know that if hes sick, he should tell you right away instead of leaving you in the theater for an hour. This shouldnt be that big of a problem though, so dont worry about it too much.
OK My bro. is the same age i am 13. he seems to think boys are stronger than girls. But i showed him off. and beet him at like 15 different things. so my question is which do you think is stronger boys or girls.
this is a really debateable question. supposedly, guys are physically more stronger thang girls because of genes, though that's not always the case. It just depends on the guy/girl in the situation. Sometimes girls can be stronger, sometimes guys can be.
In the middle of February I fractured my wrist in a basketball game. Well, I got a cast, (from wrist to elbow), and i took it off because it was bothering me. Now, whenever i do stuff like bowl, play pool, pitch fastball softball, throw, basically anything involving movement with my wrist, alot, it hurts for several days after. I was wondering what I can do so it wont hurt forever because it never healed 100%. If I got a cast again, and kept it on, lol, would it heal because there would be no movement for 2 - 3 weeks as opposed to my wrist guards and ace bandages. Answers will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
you should try seeing a doctor for advice. If a cast will help you heal your wrist then might as well not move it for 2-3 weeks as opposed to being able to move your wrist with the help of wrist guards and bandages but having it hurt. Besides, if a cast will help it heal, then 2-3 weeks isnt that bad, compared to years of pain. =)
I can't help liking this girl even though there's all these reasons I shouldn't. I'm going to graduate next year and she's a year younger so she'll still be in high school; she knows I like her and specifically told me that she doesn't like me the same way; we talk a lot on a personal one-on-one level, but when there are others around she hardly pays attention to me. Recently, it seems things are becoming more awkward between us - we talk less and I feel like she's putting up a barrier.
My question is two-fold:
- I know I should probably give up on her, but I want to at least remain friends - is that too much to ask?
- I don't know exactly HOW to stop liking her and wanting her to like me in a more-than-friends manner.
wanting to remain friends with her isn't too much to ask for. Maybe shes afraid of the fact that you like her which is why she avoids you and things get awkward. It's always hard to give up on someone you like; but it's sometimes best to do it.
Try to hang out with other people than this girl and put some space between you guys. Dont talk to her one-on-one if it just gets awkward. Figure out what you like about her and see if other girls have it too. After all, she isn't the only girl out there. If she doesnt want to remain good friends with you, why bother trying? Maybe it's the fact that she doesnt want you to like her that causes her to avoid you. Try talking to her about it and if things get too awkward, try to spend some time away from the girl. besides, with graduation, you have a better chance of finding other girls to like and maybe you'll find someone else in college.
if im incoherent or not helping, feel free to send me a message! i hope things work out for you.
I just got a new computer and it has a CD burner. I really want to use it. Does anyone know where I can go so that I can download free music and then put it on a CD?
Thanks in advance* I rate high*
Oh, and I already tryed Rhapsody
you could try emp3world.com It's free music but some of it doesnt work.
Well Sunday is Mother's Day. My boyfriend does not have a Mother. He lost her to breast cancer 4 years ago. I don't know what to do...Please help me/us.
if your boyfriend knows your mother very well and vice versa, you should invite him over to spend mother's day with your mother or at least spend some time with him on that day.
I like this guy named Eric but like hes supposably a "geek" in our school but I dont care. I just dont know what to do. I mean hes a really good friend of mine but what am I suppose to do just go up to him and be like i like you. Um no. Theres a semi coming up too and I really want to go with him.. but I dont know how that would happen. Im just confused and dont know what to do
well first off, your idea 'just go up to him and be like i like you' actually isn't that bad of an idea, lol. guys sometimes need things to be put obviously for them to get it. You could do that.... only... in a more subtle way? explain that even though you two are really great friends, you want to take the relationship further or something? Or do something sweet and like leave notes or something... but its definitely better to tell him in person than online/phone or through other people. And ask him to the semi...? it's not weird for a girl to ask a guy to a dance. i asked one of my guy friends to homecoming before, lol
I'm 18/F and I have literally done nothing sexually. The furthest I've ever gone is one closed-mouth kiss 4 years ago that lasted a few seconds. How pathetic is this? Why aren't guys attracted to me at all?
There's a guy I kinda like now and I really want to hook up with him but I have no clue how to go about that considering I've had zero experience. Help!
you dont have to have any experience to have a good relationship. You're 18 and you want to do something 'sexually' already? It's not pathetic and actually normal in most cases. Just because you haven't done anything sexual doesnt mean guys aren't attracted to you. It just takes time.