I have spent my entire life analyzing the human mind and social situations. When I give advice, it's like I am helping them and myself. I will never judge you , I will never tell you anything that I am unsure of. I have taken many sociology, and psychology classes in pursuit of becomming a profiler. Please feel free to ask me anything. And if you are interested on my site I have many blogs that show how I see life and the human mind.
http://www.myspace.com/lilmegsoko
E-mail: Lilmegsoko@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: MI
Occupation: Psychology student
Age: 22
AIM: Lilmegsoko
Member Since: April 30, 2007
Answers: 113
Last Update: December 4, 2007
Visitors: 6732
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My boyfriend and I fight all of the time and he says that I don't show him I care. Im always all over him and say the nicest things to him but i dont know what else to do? does anyone know anything that can help me show him that i care so much! (link)
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Sounds like he is insecure, and crying for attention. Instead of giving him MORE attention, show him what he has already. Stop doing the things you do now. Then when he notices sit him down explain how you feel then go back to how you were. Sometimes a smack in the face is needed to make someone see how much you care.
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Ok, so normally I'm the one giving the advice, but right now I really need some advice, so here's my story...
It's been going on all of my life..My Aunt is a Cocaine addict. She has a son who is 2 years older that I am. So, about 4 years ago, when he was 12 and i was 10, my mom and stepfather finally decided to take him away from my Aunt, and he came to live with us. But, during the year after we took him in, my stepfather came down with lung cancer. He went through everything, like chemo, and radiation and it finally went away. Now, by this time which is about 2 years ago, my aunt starts doing a little better. My cousin, John, by now is 14 and we let him visit his mother more. But then his mother goes in jail, and my stepfathers cancer comes back. So, now about 1 month ago, my cousin is now 16, and a junior in high school. He is acting out in any way possible, smoking pot, having sex, and just not listening to anyone. Also, my stepfather is in very bad condition with his cancer. He can barely walk himself and he probably only has a few months, if that, to live. So we have had it, and we let John go back with his mother. But, we can't help from feeling guilty and feeling like we failed.
So, what I'm asking is if you think ther is anything else we can or should do to help? And if we should feel all of this guilt, and feeling of failure?
Thanks.. (link)
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It doesnt help that he is 16.Right now, you just need to let him go. You need to worry about your stepfather. We are our parents. Him acting out is his way of coping with his past. Not to mention he is taking after his mother. You cant help someone that doesnt want to be helped. The best you can do is be there for him when/if he decides he wants to change his act. At 16 he is still a minor. Go to social services and turn him in if you are worried about him getting hurt. Maybe some time behind bars will snap him into shape. I know a lot of kids that sound like him that changed their ways after seeing what life behind bars is like.
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what are good songs about friends like im making a slideshow of my friends and i and i need a good song about friends but nothing gay (link)
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Default- Count on me
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Hi, I really hope you can help; i've gotten mixed responses from others...
Basically, my BF discovered that in my senior year of college (I graduated last year) I had taken two semesters worth of judo classes and he thought this was really funny b/c I don't look like, I guess, a "typical" jock chick--that is i'm not muscular or buff or whatever...i'm your stereotypical "girly girl" in appearance--tall, skinny, blond hair, blah blah blah and I'm like 125 lbs....so he's laughing at me, calling me "judogirl", etc., and I was fine w/all that, if a little annoyed, but then he made a mistake: he challenged me to a wrestling match...and I beat him.
He outweighs me by like 40 lbs. and is pretty strong but he didn't understand that my judo skills would use his strength against him and he just couldn't believe I won. I figured it was a one-time deal, but he was so bent out of shape that he's challenged me several times since then, and I've defeated him every time. It would be OK if he didn't take it so seriously, but he just becomes this mean pouty jerk when he loses and keeps challenging me and now i've refused to wrestle him b/c it's no fun and I hate his sexist attitude as well. But refusing to wrestle just makes him angrier and he says stuff like "you're just afraid i'll figure out your 'tricks' and win...it's so annoying!
I've considered just faking it and letting him win but I don't REALLY want to do that b/c I'm proud of my skills, and just wish he would be too...plus when he baits me w/all this "you're just a girl" crap, it gets my goat and i'm more than happy to throw him to the floor and pin him when he gets too tired to fight me off...
Have you ever beaten a boy at something athletic--whether martial arts or sports--or know a girl who has? B/c maybe if I can tell him he's not the only one he won't feel so bad... (link)
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There is a guy i know that was in jail on a regular basis. He would always rough house with me because when he made me mad i would punch him in the arm as a joke. One day he decided to try to play fight me. He got me down on the ground but i was able to not just move but flip him and reverse the position. This is a man filled with scars and such from jail. Who fought regularly and was good at it. He stopped and was like "Holy crap i just got whooped by a 5ft chick." But he accepted it. Tell your man to get over it. Sounds like he is a little insecure. ;) Good for you though I think thats great.
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so, um, what part of the penis gives the guy most pleasure when you rub it or just touch it? (link)
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The head, and the vain that runs from the bottom to the top.
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There's these so called "popular" or "cool" girls in my school, who think they are superior to people that aren't "popular" like them. I can't describe how they treat me as mean, because it isn't exactly, they kind of treat me like a dumb and use me as a way to have a good laugh with each other. For example:
Girl: (In a exagerrated way) Hi Lily!!!!!
Me: Hi..
Girl: Come on do a cheer for us! Do a split!
(This is because they know I do cheerleading)
Girls: What are you reading JACKIE??
ME: A magazine
Girls: Watch out jackie we're coming to get you! (THey both run at me and one of them proceeds to slap my back.)
They are obviously very dumb people. I admit in the beggining of the year, I used to give into them and act dumb back like they wanted (i dont know why though!). Now, i'm starting to try to stand up for myself. Like yesterday I said when the girl asked me to do a cheer REPEADTEDLY "Can you seriously stop? Seriously, it's really annoing." I feel REALLY angry when they do these things. Does anyone have any ways to show them i'm smarter than them? I just don't want to ignore it, I kind of want them to get embarrased and make them shut up. (link)
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Ok, first you need to get into the mind of a stuck up cheerleader snobby "I am better than you" highschool girl.You want to nail them hit them with their own game. They need to understand that you dont speak the moron language that they do. Here are some things that I did in school to get them off my back.
Them:Why do you dress like that?
Me: Because, i refuse to dress like you.
Them: Why?
Me: Because then people might mistake me for being an idiot.
Or you come up to them and make THEM look dumb. Do a valley girl impression when you walk by them, that always pisses them off.
But the best tactic is to hit them where it hurts. See these girls think they are better than everyone not just you. So if you defend yourself be sure that you are around a few of their friends, and if you can have one of yours by you too. Back up is always good.
Tease them about needing to spend 4 hours in the bathroom just to make themselves look like crap. And tell them how pitiful it is that they need to rag on you to keep their self esteem high.
Or when they tease you making you feel stupid. Agree with them in the sense of..."Thanks for telling me that, God what would i do without you, i am going to go tell everyone how smart you are. You came up with that yourself? Wow, your parents must be proud."
If they attack you, your appearence , or if they say something to make you look stupid...just keep agreeing with sarcasm, sometimes being a bitch is great. I mean come on, if you were stupid you would be hanging out in their crowd right. Make sure they understand that. ;)
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Okay lately ive been having really hot sex dreams about some guy at School..we are friends and talk but i dont really think about him like that untill well 2 days ago when i started having the dreams i cant stop dreaming about it.
Does this mean anything?
Does it maybe mean i like him? (link)
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Dont confuse love for lust. Especially if you have built up sexual frustration, its amazing who your mind will throw into the mix. Sounds like you definately have an attraction to him, at least a physical one. Basically you are horny and your mind is telling you while you sleep and using him as the puppet to do it.
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I'm the one that asked about sending a question to somebody's inbox. Okay, I'm in 9th grade now, but let's go back to 7th grade. There's this boy named Andrew. We were like best friends in 7th grade. We walked to band class together, we sat together at lunch, we talked in band, he called me almost every afternoon, etc. He was dating my best friend. I didn't like him. But when they broke up, I started liking him. So I told him that I liked him. (Oh, I didn't mention- he never asked girls out, he's REALLY shy. All the girls he dated asked him out.) Okay, so I just told him that I liked him. I didn't ask him out, because I'm not like that. I thought that he would ask me out, since he wasn't shy around ME. But he didn't. I heard that he liked me, but you know rumors. We still talked the same and everything. But it was SEVENTH grade. Little kids... Okay, so now let's move on to Tyler. I met him at church camp in the summer of 8th grade. He goes to a different school than me.(one town away, just a few minutes away) He has been telling me that he's liked me since we met. At church camp we didn't talk. But then he dated my friend, so I talked to him on the phone when she spent the night, and I went to the mall with him and my friend (his girlfriend). He broke up with my friend after a few weeks. Well now, a year later, me and him are still talking. I tell him stuff that NOBODY knows and he tells me stuff that nobody knows. I mean like, woah. We talk on the phone some, not much. He says he likes me. He tells me I'm beautiful. He's pretty popular and bad, unlike Andrew. But the thing is, he has a girlfriend. He said the only reason that he's going out with her and not me is because he knows her better and because I'm kinda shy. One night, he said "I REALLY like you" and he says "If I break up with my girlfriend, will you go out with me?" He's asked me a billion times and I say yes everytime. I'm just waiting on him, I guess. But it's kinda getting old. Okay, so the third guy, Will. I really like him. I met him in 5th grade. I go to his church pretty often. We're... friends, I guess. He's HOTTT! AH. I've been liking him off and on since 7th grade. He found out that I liked him at the end of 8th grade. At the beginning of this school year, he told his church friends that he was thinking about hooking up with me. The word spread to me and I was like "Omg. Wow. This can't be true." So yeah, the church went to a football game together, and he sat with me. (I'm kinda shy around boys and at first, just to let you know) So I didn't really talk to him.. And he sat with me at pep rallies at school. He called me, we talked. He asked me to go to the mall, I said yes, but we didn't get to go. Then he just kinda stopped talking to me. Then like a week later I read his "about me" on his myspace and it said "My name is blah..asdf .. blah .. 'i can't get a girlfriend to save my life, as my cousin jessica says'...blah" So I messaged him and said "you COULD get a girlfriend to save your life if you wouldn't give up on her while she's trying to get to know you" and he said "i know that's true but you never said more than 3 words to me... it didn't seem like you wanted to get to know me" ... so yeah, that was the beginning of the year. He knows I still like him. But he's not doing anything about it. We talk on the internet alot. But in person, when me and my best friend are sitting together, he'll come up to us and say "hey carley!" and talk to her alot and barely talk to me" .... ah, help? (link)
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Guys are very simple minded creatures. But they like to play hard to get. You want to impress a guy, be blunt with him. Forget about Andrew, lets talk about Tyler and Will. Tyler's excuse is crap. You two tell eachother everything, how can he say he knows her better? I would say he is keeping you on the side in case things between him and his gf go bad. Probably the type of guy that doesnt like being alone. There may be potential but i want to focus on Will. His excuse is ligit. Maybe he is one of those guys that NEEDS YOU to make a move. He comes up to you two and basically throws himself to you. Now i am a pretty blunt person. I hooked up with my fiance because I grabbed his face and kissed him at a bar. =) Pull him aside, and flat out ask him what his deal is. Tell him you are interested and you are sick of waiting around. Ask him if you two have a shot or not. I would word it like "We have been playing this game all year. I like you and you like me, so either stop pretending or hold my hand and lets try to do this." At first his jaw will hit the floor but when he sees you are serious he will tell you exactly what he wants. I know your shy, but when it comes to shy guys and relationships its better to just put it out there so they dont have to fear rejection. This guy seems to want proof that you are actaully interested in him. Write me back if you need more advice and let me know what happens ;) Good luck hun.
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You know how it's bad to mix some medications with alcohol - is there a bad effect if you smoke pot and drink? (link)
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Depends on your tolerance. If i drink a LOT then smoke, ill get sick. If you dont have a high tolerance be careful , it makes me want to get sick just thinking about it.
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Ok, so about 4 years ago, my dad got fired from his job and got diagnosed with manic depression. To be honest he was hell to live with. After a while of being on the medication though, he started to be back to the slightly more outgoing person he'd been before. He's never been the same since really, but a month or so ago he started to try and take himself off the medication (he didn't like not being able to drink or use 'heavy machinery').
The past week or so though he's been pretty much back to how he was before. And what's more, he's lately made a friend at his new job, and he told us that there were rumours going around that they were having an affair or something. Now I KNOW that's not true, but my mum's pretty riled up about the woman, and she and my dad keep fighting. I'm really worried that something's going to happen, either to my dad, or between my mum and dad. Any advice would be really, really appreciated ^_^ (link)
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stay out of it. Its amazing what we can miss when it deals with parents. Let them handle it. There is really nothing you can do but be there for both of them and assure them that you dont think there is an affair. There could be facts you dont know about because they dont want you to know. Keep your head up im sure they will figure something out.
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I'm 15/f. I need to ask somebody a question. It's pretty long. I'll send it to your inbox, if you're interested in helping me. I don't want to put it on here, because someone that I know might figure out that it's me. It's about me and some guys. Thanks :) (link)
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go for it hun
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My period hasnt come yet
and it was suppose to come somewhat a week ago
I havent had any sexual intercourse.
What is going on, and is it going to come anytime soon?
Im not pregnat am i? i mean how could i be, i havent had sex. (link)
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the change in climate can make your period irregular, so can stress but if you worry about it it wont start. Take a warm bath and relax for a while that always made mine start.
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Ugh. Okay. I have this friend, and she's about two years older than me. I don't think she's bi, but its possible. Anyway, this morning her boyfriend broke up with her. Up until now I never even considered that I liked her, but she said something about being nobody's type, and I just felt like I wanted to kiss her and make her feel better. I think I do like her. What do I do????? (link)
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fun question. Women as you know are complicated creatures. But we like people to be blunt. It sounds like you do like her, but dont mistake love for lust. I did that and ended up with the worlds craziest girlfriend. If you want something with her,here is what i would do. Since you dont know if she is bi or not. Bring up her opinion on something gay related. example...gay marriage. Or "if (persons name) was gay, would you do her?" This will show you her opinion on gay matters, and will also give you the ability to hint to her that you have feelings for her.
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one my good friends, "liz" has a boyfriend, "andy" of about a year and a half or more. she is completely in love with him, and they're cute together. she's a sophomore and he's a junior (and so am i and my boyfriend.) they went together to prom last week and everything, even though she goes to a different school. another couple that rode in our limo with liz & her boyfriend and my boyfriend & i was our friend and his date-- megan. now things get tricky.
megan and andy sort of have a "thing" for each other. (yeah, let's just say that was an awkward limo ride.) andy and my boyfriend play baseball together, and so i sit with liz. but for the past few weeks, megan has been coming to the games and rooting for andy. and since liz doesn't go to school with us all, we can all see andy and megan flirting and everything quite often. liz and andy even went to one of megan's track meets becuase andy "felt bad because she comes to all his baseball games." (which is, well, bullshit.).
my question is whether i should tell liz or not. my best friend and i tried to discreetly talk to her about it and asked her what she though, but she didnt' seem to be concerned-- i think she's too blinded by being in love with andy. (which in this case, is a bad thing.) if i tell her all this, i know it will break her heart, and i dont' really want to be the bearer of bad news. but then again, i dont' want to have her get her heart broken by him, and then come to realize everything later. advice, please! (link)
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confront megan. Get her answer from her. If she says something that makes you think they are seeing eachother behind her back... Some good ways to tell, watch her body language, she will get figity, also, if she gets really deffensive right off the bat, chances are there is something going on. If signes seem like yes, confront him, look for the same thing. And explain you are only doing this in your friends best interest. Your her good friend sometimes you are supposed to be the bad guy when it comes to the boyfriend. then tell your friend. I would keep a close eye on them. If she wont listen to you your best bet is to catch them red handed. I would do the same thing. Your a good friend.good luck.
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me and my bf are ready for sex, but whenever he tries i go all tense and my vagina goes tight, and i really cant help it. when hes fingering im not as tense and tight but then we try having sex and its way too tight to get his penis in. its really embarrassing and i realy want to have sex.
f- 18 (link)
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Use a lubricant, of course its tight you guys never have sex. :) Buy some lubricant but be sure to get water based.The oil based will make you itch and sticky it can also cause effection. KY is usually best. There is a kind with an orange cap, its got a warming liquid in it. Its great pick it up anywhere they sell condoms. Just remember the vagina tenses when its excited. Sounds like you are ARE ready. Slap some lube on and enjoy good luck sweet heart.
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Well I have big boobs for my age and theres like light colored stretch marks on like the top of them. Do those ever go away? Oh and is it normal for your boobs to have like tiny hairs on them? (link)
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it happens. Use coco butter on them it will fade
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Is masturbation healthy? (link)
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Well it does burn calories. And i mean you cant get yourself pregnant, you know what you like, and there is no chance of getting STDs so i would say yes.
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okay you answered my question about what i can do for my boyfriend and you said...
There is a trick i learned in a sex class i took back in the day. All you need is lubricant and your hands. Flat palmed focus on the head, circling it like you are waxing something. Hold the bottom of it tight and use the other hand to stroke,move your thumb up and down the vein that runs up.The tighter you hold the more blood that will rush to the head. Which is what you want. Focus a lot on the head. They love it. Trust me he will walk up to you with a bottle of lube and puppy eyes ;)Switch it up and try different things while doing it too. You will know when you do something he likes.
but im a little bit confused
can you try to explain like where to hold it and stuff a little bit better? and what do you mean "like you are waxing something"
thanks! (link)
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The most sensative part of his penis is the head. There is an indent on the head from the hole that leads to the vain that goes all the way down. on that indent take your thumb and run it up and down while you stroke the rest of it. When i say waxing, i mean take the palm of your hand and circle it around the head. You can also make your hand into a fist large enough to stick the head into and stroke just that section with one hand and stroke the rest of it (tightly) with the other. When you stroke use a cricular motion like you are screwing something in. I know its kind of weird sounding, but once you start you will understand what i mean. Like i said focus on the head and the big vain coming from the indent. Oh and when you are using one hand and holding the it, old it tightly on the bottom right above his sac if you want occassionally move it up and down that rushes the blood to its head, which is a lot of fun for him If you still need help let me know. Ill try to word it better.
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i feel like whenever i do stuff with my boyfriend hes mostly doing stuff to me or making the first move. like i wanna make him feel good too but i just dont like know what to do. some help please? (link)
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There is a trick i learned in a sex class i took back in the day. All you need is lubricant and your hands. Flat palmed focus on the head, circling it like you are waxing something. Hold the bottom of it tight and use the other hand to stroke,move your thumb up and down the vein that runs up.The tighter you hold the more blood that will rush to the head. Which is what you want. Focus a lot on the head. They love it. Trust me he will walk up to you with a bottle of lube and puppy eyes ;)Switch it up and try different things while doing it too. You will know when you do something he likes.
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does it always hurt when you have sex the first time? and also... like does it feel kinda like when you put a tampon in.. because that doesnt feel good so when i have sex will that not feel good either? (link)
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When i lost my virginity it didnt hurt at all. All women are different. As long as he takes it slow though you should be ok. No ,it doesnt feel like a tampon, in fact its a completely different feeling. A tampon doesnt hit your walls. If you are planning on losing your virginity , tell him to take it slow , and explain to him you are nervous about it hurting. A good guy will understand that and be gentle. It also helps if maybe you are the one who puts it in. That way your in control so if it does hurt you can stop =) Good luck sweety
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