BY no means am I always right or know what to do. However, I will tell you what I would do in your situation and what I know to be the most honest and helpful advice that I can give.
Thanks for asking,
Honestymatters
Gender: Female
Location: Las Vegas Nevada
Occupation: Office Administration/Single MOM
Age: 31
Member Since: October 29, 2005
Answers: 72
Last Update: November 16, 2005
Visitors: 7109
Main Categories:
Work/School Relationships
Love Life
Families
View All
|
| |
|
okay me and my boyfriend have been together for a while and i use to always go over to his house then something happened and his parents believe the rumor i want to see him really bad and my parenst dont like me having a bf so what should i do to see him and i'm 14/f (link)
|
Dear Sooo lonely,
First, you really should honor your parent's wishes. But if you can convince them that you are miserable with out him, maybe they would understand. As for his parents believing a rumor: Is the rumor true? Or fabrication? Can you prove the rumor is a lie? IF you can prove it is a lie take your proof and talk to his parents. Above all stay honest with everyone and yourself. Hope I helped you. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
My boyfriend's birthday is coming up and I need to figure out what to get him. In his myspace he has a picture of a giraffe ( I don't know he's just random like that ) anyways, above it hes like," my birthdyas coming up, get me this " i know he's like joking, but do you think it'd be kinda funny or something if i actually got him it? Haha.. I have no idea. It's my first boyfriend I dunno how to shop for them lol. He also was joking around once and was like," Get me a red mercedes with black interior and booming music " so I was thinking about getting him a little hot rods car. I don't know. Does it sound to cutesy? If it does, can you possible suggest some other ideas? Thank you so much.
p.s. We've been dating for..2 weeks now. And by the time his birthday comes, it'll be 4 weeks and something days. Please help, once again, thank you so much (link)
|
Take another look at the picture of the giraffe. Is it the only thing in the picture?
As for the car, can you afford a real car? NOPE? Then try and find him a model of one that he can put together himelf. Those are usually fun for guys. If the picture of the giraffe is just a giraffe then buy him a big stuffed giraffe to go with the model car kit. When buying the car kit do not forget glue, paint and a fine tip brush.
Buying him the big stuffed animal says I LOVE YOU, buying him the car kit says, sorry I cannot get you the real thing.
GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
Ok, my gramma has cancer and shes dying. We dont think she will make it until Christmas. I have a big family, and we are all very close, so it's a sad thing. But for some reason, i just dont feel sad. I feel guilty, it feels like i dont care. I know i do care, but i dont feel sad. It seems like everyone else is sad except me. Am i like a bad person? Is this normal? Please help! (link)
|
Dear I'm not sad,
Reading through other member's advice, I agree with most of them. You are normal, everyone reacts differently to death. You may not even grieve after she is gone. BUT If everyone else is all sad about the news, then you should take a stand and say, "she's not dead yet, why are you all so sad" Make the most of every moment she has left on this planet. Even buy her a Christmas gift and give it to her tomorrow. With everyone around her expecting her to die soon she cannot be happy. Be the joy in her life so she can die with a smile. I hope that I have helped even a little. Give your grandma a hug for me OK. Best Wishes
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
well i was just wondering what do you do when you really have no one to turn to? when you grandmother don't care, your father is never their, you mom dosen't seem to understand and you sister just critizes you and you don't really have anyone to turn to? i just need some advice please help.. (link)
|
Dear What do you do,
I am sorry to hear that you feel you have no one to turn to, but you are wrong! You have turned to this site. We are here anytime you need someone to talk to. Also try talking to a school counselor. Or friends from school. This may be a small world but it has some big hearts in it. Maybe a neighbor down the street needs someone to talk to just like you. Get out and make friends. Then you will have more options of who you can turn to. What ever you do remember that we are always here. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
13-f ok i was having sex and my dad walked in.. what do i do i havnt seen him since and i wa but naked head to toe and so was he no blankets and .. idn please help !! i rate HIGH (link)
|
Dear OMG,
First of all I do hope that you were responsible enough to where a condom. If not, then you have bigger problems than getting up the nerve to talk to your dad!
The first rule of having sex is never do it where you can get interrupted. The second rule is never do it in your parents house.
Your dad just saw his 13 year old daughter having sex. He is in shock, unless he's known about you being sexually active. (Then he is embarrassed for walking in on you.) He is probably dwelling over where he went wrong and trying to figure out how to talk to you about it. Break the ice by telling him that you are sorry he had to find out that way (if he didn't know about you being active) and that it won't happen again. Then ask him at what age he started having sex. Talking to your father you must be open and honest, but above all get his advice and even ask him which brand of condoms he recommends.
Sex is not a bad thing, on the contrary, it is a beautiful thing no matter who you are with. I am not going to criticize you for having sex at the age of thirteen. Some girls mature faster than others, just be responsible about it and stay protected.
GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
Hi. I'm 13/m and my sister is 14/f. Last night she was IMing a friend from another state who said he wanted to have sex with his girlfriend. Then they got into a discussion on why it's right or wrong to have sex before age 16. My sister believes that she should wait until she is 16. I belief any pre-marital sex is wrong, and I refuse to lose my virginity until I am married.
Later in their conversation (I was being a little brother and looking over her shoulder) he said that my sister's boyfriend wants sex too. My sister said no, but the other guy was just like "ooooooo yes he does". Then I remembered that theory that all a guy ever wants is sex. Hence, the song Punk Rock 101 by Bowling For Soup: "She thinks that it's love, but to him, it's sex!"
I don't trust her boyfriend. I've transferred a call to my sister, and he really didn't sound all that great. Also, my sister refuses to let me meet him in any way. He can't come over, because I just can't meet him. I tried to IM him. My sister told him to block me. What the hell?
I'm afraid of two things: number one, does he want sex? Saying no is probably harder than it sounds... and number two, will this change her image of him? Will she be consious of the fact that he may or may not want sex? I know if I were in her shoes, I would. I don't know... I'm just worried for her... (link)
|
Dear MY Sister's Boyfriend,
BeautifulMadness is right. Don't become the over bearing brother. Give her the privacy he needs. If you want to get to know her boyfriend better, promise her that you will not interfere with their relationship! Let her know that you just want what's best for her and if she ever needs anything that you will be there for her. If she decides to have sex, that is her business, not yours. The only thing you can do is voice your concerns and then let it go. She will either come to you or she won't. Either way, honesty is the best policy. She will appreciate you more if you just be there for her, no matter what she does in her life. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
How do i start well when i first started school there was this guy and i liked him when i first saw him. I looked for him on my first day of school and i wished i could see him again anyway as time went on he got my number contacted me and he even took me home. He asked me if he could kiss me and i think i kinda just hugged him because to be honest i get really scared of that sort of thing i think ohh what if i do it all wrong and he does not like me afterwards. Now A few days went by and he asked me out i gave him an excuse that i was not allowed a bf his name was james. I said that to him because another boy told me he liked me and i thought it would be horrible to say yes to one and no to another. So lets call the other one Jack.. Jack asked me out three times and i said no. My friend told me yesterday Jack does not like you anymore hes gone off you. How can he have gone off me that quick? ahh i kinda like jack aswell.Thing i need help on is i think i like James more and james is taking me home on monday and if he trys to kiss me i really want to but i don't know how???? and i don't want to hurt Jack... because i kinda have feelings for jack aswell... Someone help before monday please because hes taking me home on monday Thank you. ahh another thing is in school jack always wants to be with me and james does not... (link)
|
Dear Two Boys,
First thing to keep in mind is be honest with both boys, but date them both. Remember, dating is just a way to get to know them better. While dating you are not obligated to kiss, have sex or even hold hands. If you decide to go steady with one, then quit dating the other. You said Jack has "gone off you", this just means he has given up trying to get you to go out with him. It does not mean that he doesn't like you. Call him, tell him the truth. You have been asked out by other boys and cannot decide who to go with. Tell both boys that you want to get to know them better by dating both with no commitments to either one. Who knows, you might like Jack more than James once you get to know them both. IF they are not OK with this, then they are not interested in getting to know you and are not worth your time. Take things slow, patience is a virtue, trust me, the one that really likes you will do anything for you.
Above everything, be honest with everyone. If they cannot handle it, then you are better off without them. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
Im good at giving advice, but when it comes to my problems its alittle harder. Theres this boy, hes one grade unger me(hes a soph and im a junior) and me and him were hookin up, I found out he was still hooking up with his ex, and I was stupid and gave him another chance, it happened again, and now we dont even associate anymore, but for some reason I cant get over him. I try to show off in front of him in school, and try to take the ways I would see him. Why is it so hard for me to get over him? Im just so confused and I dont know what to do. Please help... (link)
|
Dear He has someone else,
Teen girl is right, after a while you will get over him. It's experiences like these that make us stronger. He isn't over his EX, obviously, or he wouldn't be with her. As long as you keep showing her that you cannot let him go, she is going to keep him on her leash. You gave him chances and he blew them, move on with your life, he is not worth your time. Who knows, maybe there is a guy that is worth your time right under your nose. You just cannot see him because you are too busy wanting what you cannot have. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
To anyone, but especially to other Wiccans:
Hey,
I'm a Wiccan, and I think it's a beautiful religion and I really love it, but lately I'm finding I just don't have the time. I've read so many things that just say 'MAKE the time!' but that is so impractical when you are fifteen and in the middle of 21 GCSEs and an A Level (I kid you not...if you are English you will appreciate how hard that is lol)! I really desperately want to be a better Wiccan, to learn more about my religion, to be closer to the God and Goddess and nature, but I have no idea how. I walk to school and so I often try and think about and appreciate the nature...but I'm usually half asleep! Does anyone have any ideas?
I know that spellcraft isn't the only element of Wicca, and it is by no means the most important, so please don't suggest that I just 'do some spells'...for one I don't have the time and for another, my faith in this religion isn't quite so superficial that I can make myself believe I am being a better Wiccan by waving an athame through some incense smoke a few times a week. As Scott Cunningham once wrote in an excellent article, the ritual doesn't mean a thing if you don't mean it mentally. True Wiccanism relies on belief, not ritual. (link)
|
Dear A Better Wiccan,
You said it all in your last line, "True Wiccanism relies on belief", just keep believing. You're fifteen and the Wiccan society is not going anywhere. Take care of things and when you have time, then learn more about the religion. Above all, GET MORE SLEEP. You cannot learn more about anything or enjoy life around you if you are too tired to keep your eye open. GOOD LUCK
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
Okay well, I like this Boy named jonathan. But I am afraid to ask him out. What if he says no or somthing . Well the most basic thing is that I am really shy and dont know what to say to them. umm. like what I say I have his phone number or I can talk to him at school but what should i say to him??? Please help if you give me a good answer then I will give you a rating so if you want your rating to go up you can answer this seriously and I will for sure give you a five is if it's good advice (link)
|
Dear Help Please,
Being shy is natural and often comes with fear of rejection. Don't be afraid to speak up. IF he doesn't have a girlfriend start with talking to him at school, only call him if he gives you permission. If you are too afraid to talk face to face, then pass him a note. You could sweep him off of his feet by giving him a letter telling him the things you like about him and that you would like to get to know him better. Find something that you both have in common. Ask him what kind of movies he likes to watch, if he wants to go to the movies with you or come to your house and watch a movie. Maybe he is having trouble in one of his classes and you can tutor him. There are endless possibilities, but always remember the worst he can do is say no. If you don't try and talk to him then you will always wonder if he would have said yes. What ever you decide to do, keep in mind that Jonathan is not the only boy worth asking out. Good luck and keep me posted, OK.
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|
I am kind of scared because one of my friends got sexualy harrassed today, a guy lifted up her shirt in the hallway. One of my friends says that her boyfriend tried to rape her or sexually assalt her in the bathroom, she wont tell me if thats true. What should i do to get her to answer me, and what should i do about her harassment?? (link)
|
Dear What Happened,
Being scared for your friend just means that you care. Let your friend know that she can talk to you about anything. Give her your advice once and let it go. Tell her that she doesn't have to report anything she doesn't want to, but that she should not allow anyone to treat her disrespectfully. Don't nag her or try forcing her to talk about it. The harder you try to do something about her problems, the more she is going to resent you. This may lead to a quick end in friendship. If she doesn't take your advice then just be there when he learns the hard way and needs a shoulder to cry on. Good luck!
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
Well, I am scared to death of my mom for no apparent reason. I am scared to do school work while she is awake because she might get mad at me. I hate to ever get money from her. It is so bad that I fear to even get a ride from her because I have this big fear of guilt. Isn't that hopelessly pathetic? I don't know why but I feel that if I let her do anything for me, that I am being a shitty child. Please someone else tell me that I am not just crazy or weird or someone else tell me that they have this issue.
15/m (link)
|
Dear Typical Teen,
Being afraid of your mom is typical of most teens, I know I was. You shouldn't feel guilty about getting rides or be scared to do homework while she is around though. Moms are most happy when their kids need them. What is it about her behavior that has you feeling guilty, or scared? Have you tried opening up to her about your fears? Honesty and communication are the key to a healthy relationship. When you have these two bases in any relationship there will be trust and understanding. NEVER KEEP YOUR FEELINGS BOTTLED UP!!!
Sincerely,
Honestymatters
|
|