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I am a person who believes that negative criticism never does anything right and only demoralizes... I have been through a lot... but everytime I have fought back...There should be a certain way for making someone show the correct path...and I believe that it should be unbiased and free from personal grudges...this is what i am trying to do...where they will see me not as another columnist just trying to give advices rather see me as a friend whom they can rely upon blindly and be a support when they need a true friend...
But its a request not to use any abusive languages...
Gender: Female
Location: India
Occupation: Research scholar
Age: 28
Member Since: February 13, 2013
Answers: 72
Last Update: September 12, 2023
Visitors: 7526

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15/F Canada. I really like this boy! He's in my class, and I know he liked me too. We want to be together... but I'm not sure if I am ready yet. I just got over a break up, and it really hurt me. Advice anyone? Thank you! (link)
what are you waiting for?? jst do it!!! dont let you past overshadow your future..


25/f. The guy is my ex boyfriend, as of the end of January. We broke up after over a year of a wonderful relationship, essentially, because he's not emotionally mature enough to be in a relationship with me. I've just been through a lot (including serious lifelong health issues, and various types of abuse including emotional, physical, and sexual), and I think I feel/act quite a bit older than I am because of all that I've experienced.
Anyway, he panicked, after being disqualified from something very important to him, and seemed to regress, beginning to act like his high-school self, and point blank, I don't want to date someone who acts that young. But I feel so confused, because this irresponsible person is not the guy I love or the guy I was dating... but I think the man I love no longer exists...
I just feel like a lost little girl. I live alone, I'm financially independent, and though I talk to my parents daily, I rarely see them. I'm very confused by what went on yesterday, and I'd love some input/insight.

I went yesterday to give his mom's Tupperware back to her, since I know they're two pieces she uses quite a bit and I'd had them for around two months. She and I were very close, and she's really making an effort to stay connected with me. She (and his dad) told me I was like the daughter they never had, and they loved me, and I would always be welcome, no matter what. (We talked after he and I broke up.) So, I went over to their house and he was there. He and I still talk daily, almost constantly. I had been talking to his parents for a few days, and they so badly wanted to see me, I figured I'd stop over and see them.
I said "Sorry" to him when he came over to see me, and he shrugged and made a face like he couldn't imagine why I'd be sorry, and hugged me. I thought he was going to be at work, I hadn't intended to see him two days in a row. I accidentally caught him at work when he was about to go on break, and he invited me to lunch with him the day before.
Long story short, I was standing just barely in the kitchen, where everyone was gathered, we talked, and they invited me to take off my coat and stay awhile. Before I could think of an excuse to keep my coat on, my ex had taken it off my shoulders.
We all sat and talked for awhile about just everyday life. I told them funny stories about my job. We laughed at how neither of us had done anything for valentine's day, and how I bought myself a box of chocolates, and how his dog still listened to me better than him, even though the dog hadn't seen me in more than a month... at some point, his mom said "Dinner's ready!" and I said "Well, that's my cue to head out," and they all invited me to stay.
I said "I don't want to impose," and he said,
"Mom's making lasagna; it's delicious. You're fine."
so I said "Well... if you're sure you don't mind..." and his mom immediately put silverware in front of me. I caught his attention and gave him an "Are you sure?" look, and since he's always been great at reading me, he nodded, and we started cleaning off the kitchen table.
So I stayed for dinner. We talked, we laughed, he flicked my knee under the table, I put my cold water glass against his neck, his parents laughed at his squeaky "COLD!" reaction. After dinner, I helped his mom wash the dishes and we talked some more.
Eventually, it was late, and I had a long drive home, so I put my coat on. His parents made sure I understood that I could come see them anytime I was in town, anytime I needed a hug, or to come see the dogs, or any reason I could think of, even if I couldn't think of one.
He hugged me tight and I heard him sigh, I kissed his cheek, he looked like he wanted to kiss me, and I turned and left.
I don't know if it hurt, or if it was nice for everything to feel normal for awhile. I don't know what I'm feeling at all, really... I just hurt...
Please help me. (link)
You two are still in deep love.. true love is rare and you both have true feelings for each other..even his parents adore you...whom or what are you waiting for? If you have love.. you may have fights...you may have disagreements..irritations.. but at the end of everything you will be there for each other..my person view would be to talk about him on a serious note about being together again.. all the best


Well I have this boyfriend who is the sweetest guy ever, he gave me flowers for valentines day, takes me out to dinner, comes to all of my performances, and treats me like a princess.:) We have been dating for 6 months now but recently within the last couple of months he has been giving me one word answers while we are texting and so i ask what he is doing and his response is always "computer". I am fine with him being on the computer but I really miss our old conversations we used to have and his long sweet texts:'( I told him about this and he is still the same sweet, loving guy i know when we are hanging out, but when we are texting, it's not the same. I know that texting should not determine how a guy feels about you but why did he always used to send long adorable texts and now not so much? (link)
dont emphasize so much on texting dear.... maybe he's having some monetary probs and he's not sharing about it.....


I'm not going to tell you everything about my life but what's going on now. I know I'm young (15) but I've been sad me whole life. I've always tried filling my sadness with a boyfriend. Even if I knew I wasn't happy but I've haven't dated anyone cause I just want to have my highschool love .I want a boyfriend who will like me for me & not for my looks. Guys always say your sexy blah blah blah. People have no respect for me. I want someone that will make me feel like nothing bad will ever happen when I'm with them but no. Im scared to be with someone at the same time cause I'm also every bad at having relationship. I grew up learning use your looks to get by life. I was once in love or so I though. When we first started dating it didn't last long he broke up with me. & I cryed for 8 months for him thinking he'll come back I know he will but when I started getting over him I ended up losing my virginity to him but he only like me for my looks he once told me " I'm physically attracted to you" I was so stupid for doing that that day I lost it I fryer my eyes out but then I realize I'm not going to cry I'm going to learn from it. But ever since that I can't find that right Guy for me. Idk I'm just lost with love. Thanks for reading this hopefully you give your comments on this (link)
First of all dont panic so much..and forget about losing virginity and all...what has happened has happened and you cannot change the past..do u think that since people call you sexy they dont respect you??being sexy or good looking is not a crime, neither does it make people give you less respect...
But using your looks only to get by life is wrong...and thats where you made the mistake..but you can always rectify yourself.Use ur brains and talent...and if you dont have them...use your hard work to make things work out..this will not only earn you respect but you will feel happy about yourself , your achievement... your self respect...stop making life pathetic for yourself...you are just 15...stop craving for a boyfriend..go get a life for yourself first...true love will come hoping along...have patience dear sis...all the best


I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and a half now and I actually do love the kid, he's amazing and completely faithful and he loves me but I think Im falling for my best friend, the way he looks at me gives me butterflies and I cant help but blush whenever they mention his name, and I love talking to him and I feel like I melt when he looks me in the eyes and I notice the way he always stares at my lips when we're talking and then glances at my eyes every five seconds or so, I sometimes feel like I'm friend zoning him but he's never really actually told me he likes me like that and he likes some other girl or so he says. But, I have no idea what I should do, help ? (P.S this is the first time this has happened to me) (link)
Now let me get it straight...when your boyfriend proposed you, did you say yes because you loved him or because you wanted a boyfriend and he was there for you?? DO YOU actually LOVE HIM??? if you do love him dont think of fiddling around with any other person..dont even think romantically about him...he's your best friend only...it is temporary attraction...divert your mind..this best friend of yours hasn't even told anything to you..set your proirities first..have you ever thought of how and what you have felt if you were in your bf's position??


whenever my in laws come over i got to my room, the kids are either younger or older than me and I'm 17. Am I wrong for going to my room ? (link)
You are running away from a situation..face it bravely..In life you have to face many grave situations..


I have spent 2 valentines day without someone, the last time I had a boyfriend was 2011, he jilted me and it really hurt, since then I haven't had a serious relationship and that's what I am looking for.. Since 2011,I have been with about 4 guys not basically a relationship but a fling or I just decide to say yes out of pity and then break up... I haven't found what I want, someone who would fill that space my very ex boyfriend left, someone who I would love and who would love me back... I don't club, or party, my 2 close friends think my life is boring, they have boyfriends and they always spend the week or vals day with them I just feel so left out, my roomates also have boyfriends, I'm very pretty, 5'5 and slim but I don't know why I can't get someone within the age of 25 to date me... Please tell me what to do its been 2yrs (link)
dont be desperate...this way you will never be happy..love will find a way..I am 24 and I dont have a boyfriend since the last few years..and I dont think it has anything to do with lifestyle or looks...its that finding a perfect match needs time..its a basic instinct of girls to love someone deeply and be loved back in return...but its not something like some commodity which can be obtained just by the click of a mouse..its a priceless thing...and thus needs the right place and the right time to spread its magic..meanwhile enjoy life as it comes your way...bf is not everthing...enjoy activities which you enjoy doing!!!


My boyfriend and I took a lot of pictures for Valentines day, which all happen to be on his phone cuz my phone sucks and his is a lot better. So we were on our way to his soccer game and he had twenty minutes to warm up. I asked him if I could send myself some of the pictures from his phone and he said okay. So I was able to send myself one picture. I was basically attaching the rest of them all in one text. He is sitting right next to me putting his cletes about to go and warm up. He stops me and tells me he needs his phone im thinking uhm, you are about to warm up, you don't need your phone. So he says, it's my phone. I didn't even send the one I was attaching and gave it back. I was mad. he made me feel curious like what is he hiding? Then he tells me im wrong for being mad. Am I? (link)
I am telling you to follow your instincts..not to trust blindly..sometimes what we see dont appear to be the truth...so jumping to conclusions is not right...that does not mean that I am telling you wait until something bigger happens..I am telling you to wait so that you can get more chances to test his loyalty...chances are there he might pass those tests..You are telling that he might be cheating on you...but you are not sure..so start taking note of his words and actions... but view his every action keeping in mind all aspects which may be the truth..I mean that dont look his every action with suspicion... If any where he gets to know that your doubting his actions two things may happen 1. If he is loyal, he might get immensely hurt and break up and you will be left with repenting 2. if he's not he will become more careful so that he will try to cover up everything and you may never reach the truth..and all the way he will blame you only.. so wait while observing him..be careful..dont be mad..be tactful.


Okay so here's the deal. I am 18 years old and for about a month I have been having horrible right side abdomen pain and then it starting moving around my belly. Well Friday (it is now monday) I had pooped and I looked and it was covered in red blood. And the poop was really easy to come out (kind of mooshy) well I called my GI who I just seen the day before for the fist time about my stomach pain. And he said come in immediately. Well when I got there he done a rectal exam and said there is no active bleed down there and said it might be internal. He sent me for a CT scan and I don't know what he was looking for but they came in and said it was negative I could go home. Well when I got home I went to poop again and there was a little poop and more blood actually a lot of blood. More blood then poop. So I went to lay down because it made me dizzy then a couple hours later went and pooped again and this time it was just blood. Well ever dince then there is poop and blood still and I have diarrhea. I don't have a fever as I know of and I have nausea and the abdomen pain still but that seems to be getting worse. So if anyone has any advice or know what it could possibly be please let me know. I don't have a colonoscopy scheduled until the last of next month. I am still pooping blood but its not everytime now when I go poop. Please help me! (link)
Colonoscopy will answer all questions...one thing is that dont take tension...the more you think and brood about it...the more time will it take to heal...it may be due to colitis or some small polyps...there may be other reasons too...but dont worry..many people have this kind of problem...its not life threatening..


The other night I dreamt about me going out with this guy in one of my classes, and it was really great.
We don't talk unless its to do work and then we only talk about the work.And I wasn't thinking about him at all during the day before the dream.
But ever since I've had this dream I really like this guy-whereas I didn't before.
I don't normally believe in dream interpretation, but now I really do think that dreams mean somehting.
Just wondering if anyone knows what this could mean or knows any good dream interpretation sites? (link)
Dont read too much into it.. you may end by breaking up your heart...it may be some simple liking which you have for this guy in your subconscious mind part...nothing more..dont complicate matters..


my name is Rachel and i am 23 years old starting in January i am going to be baby sitting my cousin who is 21 years old but he has autism and has the mind of a 2 year old and when I go over there to his house i have noticed that all he does is sit there and watch barney. I mean there is nothing wrong with him watching barney every now and then in my opinion but i was wanting to get him to try to do some other things. what kind of games can I play with him or does any body have any arts and crafts ideas that I can try? Does any body of any fun ideas that I can try with my cousin while i am baby sitting him ? (link)
My suggestion would be to talk to his parents about his nature, interests etc. snce they konw him the most they can be the best one's to talk to..


13/F

My dad hates me. He is ALWAYS trying to send me to foster care! He won't just send me because he doesn't want to make my mom leave him. He wants her to see me as a devil. Here's an example: I was with both of them the other day and my dad said "We're going to get pizza and you get none.' and after I told him I didn't want to go, he said "See?! This is why she needs to go to foster care!"

My mom now thinks of me as a bad person - He's ALWAYS trying to make me tell him to "Shut up" or "Shush" so then he'll have an excuse to hurt me and get me out of the room (I don't have a room anymore because he didn't let me. HE MAKES ME SLEEP ON THE FLOOR. )

I don't want to go somewhere else, though, because I want to stay with my family - Just without him here. He doesn't abuse me, but he sort of "comes after me" if you know what I mean. Whenever I call him abusive, he says it's a punishment! When I do NOTHING! So what should I do? Ignore him for good? He's so mean!! (link)
My first question to you would be that Is he your real dad?? even if he is....how can your mom allow him to let you sleep at the floor? do have any bros or sis?anyways coming to your problem, you see life is very small..and you have to accept the fact that he will never change...the only thing you can do is to collect a lot of proofs against his abusive behaviour...like video recording, voice recording etc. and show them to your mom so that she can understand his real nature... even if that does not help you can take the help of any elder who is near to your mom...who can understand your problem and make your mom understand your problem...any random person wont do becoz she will den only believe her husband..but if still your mom doesnt see to the point I guess there's nothing you can do except try to keep your temper cool infront of your mom so that he wont be able to provoke you into saying nething bad...and one small piece of advice... concentrate on your studies and career... and make yourself an identity so that u can secure your future...becoz in d midst of all these if your career suffers, you will find ur self in utter misery... please let me know wat happens next...tc




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