GirlOfEmotions's advice column

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Q: Here is my problem. I am gay but I dont know how to ask guys out. I am always so afriad of what they might do.(e.i. gay bashing, beat me up,) So I just admire guys from a far and never talk to them and so then I end up unfufilled and emotionally drianed. Because I dont know how to talk to them. It is totally different if they come up to me or if a friend introduces them to me then I can usually be my charming self. But I just feel like something's wrong when I am in a gay bar for almost a week straight and I dont get hit on by anyone. So how do I talk to guys and how do I get over my fears?

well obviously, all guys aren't all gay so you have to be cautious on who you approach. going to a gay bar is not a bad idea because there would be many guys that would be interested in you. they might find it more attractive if you start conversation with them; talk about the things they like doing but try not to get too personal. you'll never know if some other guy in that bar is thinking why they haven't got hit on yet. maybe it's you who they're waiting for. (;

Q: I'm 13, and I've been told for around two years from time to time that I'm kinda stiff. "I need to be more fluid and less jerky." Yeah, I suppose that is true. Only, I don't know how. I'm not very sporty.. but.. can anyone recommend some simple techniques I can do.. at home.. to start becoming more flexbile/fluid? I haven't got horrible posture or anything but I really could improve and would really like to be more fluid. I want to do something about it, and any help would really be appreciated. Thanks in advance.

dancing helps a lot. you don't have to be good at it, but the more you dance, you'll definitely improve. just give it a try. if it doesn't work out for you, there are always other alternatives such as yoga, gymnastics, or anything that can keep your body moving.

Q: So me and my boyfriend were making out and he was feeling me up and stuff, and we were obiously really close together. So while thats happening, I feel him start to vibrate. From his torso down I swear he was shaking or vibrating. My friend says he was getting off lol but wouldnt I have felt it since I was so close to him? it just seems kinda werid. I'll rate for decent advice

That means he feels really strongly about you. if he just straight up felt you and nothing was going on, then he's done it before and it'd mean that he was immune to it. but if he's acting this way, he hasn't felt that way for any other girl.

Q: i have a question bout my parens ...... well dealing with them. I am 15 years old. My parents argue a lot and i cant take it. i hate it so much and they dont understand how much sress it causes me. i dont know how to deal. how can i deal with the stress and anger they cause me? please answer as soon as possible. thank you.

Signed,
Stressed and emotional

Parents arguing leads to things and you don't have to be a part of them. They can handle their own problems. you just have to let it go. you can always spend time with one parent and maybe they will realize what theyre doing to you. you should give it a try.

Q: ok, i'm in need of some advice on this one. . .my old gf (let's call her M) from about a year and a half ago has recently been acting very very nice to me. i think she has started to like me again, but i don't like her. and plus, i have a new girlfriend (let's call her C). C and M are both friends, but i don't know what to do about this situation. . .

You're in a relationship right now, so it's best to stick with her. And if 'M' was really a friend to 'C', she'd do nothing to harm your relationship with 'C.' She lost you once, and sometimes once is enough.

Q: Well, I really like this guy. Let's call him Shane. Well, he has a girlfriend who is a year older than us. And we flirt so much. Like you'd think we were like dating. It's so weird cause I really like him a lot. I was wondering, do you think he does this with all girls or do you think he really likes me?

Compare the way he acts with his girlfriend. Does he smile at her the way he smiles at you? does he tickle? play? If he seems to be flirting with you more while he has a girlfriend; that can mean that he is really falling for you. but if you happen to see him with other girls and flirts the way he flirts with you, then he's not a keeper. And i'd feel sorry for his girlfriend.

Q: me and my boyfriend went out for 9 months and it was great until the last 2 months.. all we did was fight and we spent more time fighting than being happy so we broke up, and it was kinda both of us. anyways he's with someone else and it's so hard because i know we'll never go out again and i cant seem to get over him. i just need to know how to get over him because i know it'll work out again? needing advice on how to get over him.

it's best to stay friends with him. because think about it.. if you spend your time hating him after the break up, that's just going to make it worse and the pain would be harder on you and things would go much smoother if you still have that communication with him. and if things actually work out; he might be reminded about how a great girl you were and are. and if you guys DON'T get back together, that's ohkay too because reality is all a part of life. that's what makes you stronger. (;

Q: This past summer me and this guy on my swim team had this "thing", we both liked eachother but wouldnt admit it. We hang out at every meet and (hes shy and doesnt really talk to anyone but me and a few other guys) everyone on the team told me they thought he liked me becuase i was the only girl he was nice to and actually talked to. Anyways the problem is I only see him in the summer, he lives like 10 minutes from me but we go to different schools. And ever since summer ended I cant help but keep thinking of him constantly and I still like him a lot. Is there something wrong with me to hold on to something that never really happened? And how can i get over him?

summer flings are normal. it's all a part of a teen girl's life. and maybe that crush was really strong that u can almost call it love? it takes time getting over a guy. just keep in my mind, summer ALWAYS comes around.. so do boys (;

Q: How can you tell if a guy really loves you or is just interested in sex? I rate high!

If u see him all over other girls, then he's desperate for sex. but if he spends most of his time being w. you or around you, then sex isnt the only thing he's looking for. either way, all guys are desperate for sex but the good ones actually want that "communication" w. the girl too.

Q: Ok here it goes..
I really like this guy, I'm 13 and in 8th grade and i really like him. the problem is, he's in 7th. but i see him beause our yougner brothers are on a basketball team together. I don't know if he likes me, but i like him and i want him to notice me. We have a dance coming up on Feb 9th or 10th, so how couldi get him to notice me. like...
What are some tips to get him to notice me and stuff?
.:rate 5's:.
thanks
Kate

You can always attend your little brother's and his basketball games to see him. you can also start conversation after the game so he can get a clue that u have some kind of interest in him. theres absolutely nothing wrong with talking to a seventh grader.

Q: Does anybody know were i can get psp8 brushes?
or atleast psp8 stamps.

You can always go to google and type in "photoshop brushes." That's what i did when i had Photoshop. I don't think the version of photoshop matters.

Q: Does neone know, it there is a way to find out if a female has a disease like by symptoms. She didn't go to the doctor, so how can she tell if she has a vaginal disease?

One of the obvious symptoms is constant irritation. That's my only knowledge of it. But it can only be determined by a doctor.

Q: my hair is soooo dead i have been wearing it curly lately so it gets more healthy .. but the thing is my hair isnt curly so it looks really bad. any ideas of a reconsturctor that really works? and i need somethign that will help make ur hair grow faster

Getting your hair trimmed once a month will always keep your hair healthy. It doesn't even have to be trimmed short but it would prevent split ends and being nappy.

Q: Well this weekend me and my 2 best friends are having a sleepover and were outta things to do!!
Got any ideas?

movies, magazines, prank calls.. pretty much what you see in movies. even just lyin down and talking bout random things (hint: boys) right before you sleep is always fun.

Q: okay well there is this guy that asked me out last year && i saw no. but now i regret it..because i guess i like him now..but now he is going out with my friend && everybody is like saying they are PERFECT for each other..&& i heard that he brought her a ring from jared`s && now i can`t stop thinking that it could have been me. but i`m not sure if i tell him he likes me he might reject me && me && my friend may not like me anymore..

we all go through hard times--which is a part of life. if we didnt live through difficulty, then i guess it wouldnt really be called life, riight? so i guess this is one of the many mistakes you'll be making in life. ive done this many times. i was always scared when a guy liked me so i`d stop talking to him. and now, he's going out with my friend. yes; i still do think about what could have happened if i wasnt such a coward and went out with him but that was my loss and i learned from that. you might have heard this a lot but im going to say it and its true: there ARE other guys out there. (;

Q: 13/f

Okay I'm gonna hang out with my guy friend (who is super hot and I really like) He is coming to my house and we are gonna just watch movies and cuddle on the couch and stuff so I need to wear something comfortable. I was thinking about wearing my PE shorts which are black and loose and down to my knees. Then a white wife beater that I cut a V sorta shape of the chest part. And a black bra. Then my hair in a cute but messy bun. Do you think thats cute? or slutty?

Thanks, I'll rate 5's

If you're showing a lotta skin up top, it's better to wear pajama pants to balance it out. and the top you described would actually look really cute! but P.E. shorts have to go. sorry bout that. (;

Q: I am 13 and I still don't have my period!I don't know what is going on, I weigh more than a lot of my friends and they all already have them!!!What do I do????
Love always(please help),
Gina

This is like deja vous for me (; i got my period a little after i turned thirteen. probably a few months before i turned 14. Girls get it at different rates. It's usually genetic so probably your mom got her period a little later than others too. It's normal.

Q: for the past two days, i've had a really bad gas problem. i've been in school and i've had gas and it really hurts. every time after i eat i get this.. is this the stomach flu or what?

If it was stomach flu, you'd be throwing up. I highly doubt it's stomach flu. There are a lot of cures for bad stomach aches even gas problems. there's always those simple chewing tablets called TUMS that help a lot.

Q: Dear Advicegiving people,

Yeah.. that subject was REALLY retarded. But yeah.. ok.. my LOVING boyfriend and I have been going out since July 8th & he's really sweet & all & I know he loves me because he tells me all the time & like.. I just DONT want that right now. I DONT want a serious relationship. And he's not the cutest thing ever, but he IS sweet & would give me the moon if I asked, like he's like the perfect boyfriend, but I dont WANT that. I want there to be rough times & I actually want him to disagree with me from time to time, but he treats me like a princess & thats just not what i want, but i dont want to be treated like crap either.. I just dont know right now. I want to break up with him, but i dont want to hurt him! HOW can I? Is it even possible? He's 15 by the way & so am I.

**Sorry it's soo long**

Hahaha that's how all relationships start out. The guy treats the girl like a princess. But once you guys get used to each other, the guy gets lazy and will eventually tend to be stubbourn. thats the point where things get bumpy. you can't expect drops and loops at the beginning of a rollercoaster. it takes time to get the ride starting. But if that's the only reason why you want to break up with him (just because he's perfect) that's your loss of a good man.

Q: I wonder whether any music folks out there can help me? I'm working on my audition piece "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" from the Phantom of the Opera. On the sheet music, the phrase "too many..." (in the line "too many years fighting back tears why can't the past just die?" if you have the sheet music) the syllables are three quarter notes. Above the quarter notes is a bracket with "3" written on it. What does this mean?

That would mean you would sing those quarter notes equal the length of a half note. so if you were to hear how long a halfnote sounds, you're supposed to sing those 3 quarternotes the same length as a half note. that might sound confusing, but i don't know any other way to say it.