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My name is Jesa, ask a question, get an answer.
Gender: Female
Location: Washington
Occupation: Student
Age: 24
Member Since: January 17, 2006
Answers: 158
Last Update: October 23, 2009
Visitors: 10668


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When i'm old enough [Im 16] I would a like to have a job that deals with child abuse.. idk what jobs there are but w.e is available to do to stop it that's what i wanna do..

so does anyone know of jobs that deal with this? how long i have to go to college? and that actually busts in on the parents and takes the kids away.. please help i would to help as soooon as possible.

please and thank you (link)
try to focus your studies between criminal justice, and psyhcology. (to make you better equipped to council victims of abuse) im not sure but i believe police do the actual busting in, but the police call in victims advocates to speak with the victims and to help them cope with everything going on. you can also look into volunteering at your local childrens shelters to get a little more involved early on. you may even be intrested in checking into the big brothers/sister organization. i believe some colleges even have courses in human services to help get your foot in the door. i really respect your passion for this line of work, good for you, and stick with it.


can I get pregnant on my period if I'm on birth control? (link)
birth control like the pill? if your on the pill and you take it correctly (dont miss any) you will not get pregnant when your on your period. since ive only used oral contraceptives as birth control its the only one i can speak with certainty on. however as far as i know all female contraceptives will cover you thru your period. if a lil book of instuctions came with your pills or contaceptive read it to find out how long it takes to get in your system and become effective, all the pills ive taken, nordette, alese, ortho tryciclin, and seasonale, all say use a condom until youve been on the pill for 7 days with no missed pills, but when i got my very first pack i was told by my provider to use a backup untill id gone 1 month with no missed pills. anyhow, as long as youve been using them correctly and used them long enough to be effective, you are good to go, even on your period. if your not on the pill sorry for babblin on them, if your on the shot or anything like that its gonna come down to research mode on the web or asking your provider. just always remember to make sure your partners clean of any possible stds and faithful to you, nothing but condoms offer protection for stds, and even they break sometimes. its easier for women to get stds because theres vaginal tearing every time we have intercourse.


Does any one know any good site to down load free music for an mp3 player? (link)
limewire, or winmx both nice ad free spyware free, and well... just free.


Ok so I finally did it with my boyfriend. We have been going out for about 6 months now. It was my first time and he said it was his first time also. Now that we have had sex that is all he wants to do. And I'm not down with it. I've told him before but he doesn't listen and keeps trying. What should I do to get it in his head? (link)
yhea once a boy has sex the 1st time they seem to go thru a stage of constant arousal. this is just my opinion of course, but i will say this, sex should not be had at all if your not ready for it. now im not saying this is going to happen with you guys, but i feel it should be mentioned, ive actually seen a guy who'd just lost his try to get some outside of his girlfriend after theyd had sex an she no longer wanted to. the problem with having sex with a virgin guy is that if your not ready for a sexual relationship it really shouldent be started,alot of boys who lose thier virginity go thru this, it lasts about a year because around there its still great but its not new. i think you should stand your ground and not do it again untill your ready, if he cares about you hell wait, WITHOUT pressuring you. if he cant overcome his hormones and wait for you then hes really not worth your time.


My boyfriend and I have been going out for half a year and I gave my virginity to him. He said that he was a virgin also. I feel that he was lying to me about being a virgin. I don't know what I should do to confront him with my thoughts. He seems to know too much about Sex to be a virgin.. I think he lied to me so I would sleep with him. How can I ask him about it without hurting his feelings?
(link)
hmmm the very 1st time you two had sex, how long did he last? less than 5 mins he prolly was a virgin. he may know alot about it from pornoghraphy. if your really having doubts you should ask him about it, it may seem harsh but if you want a good relationship honesty is key. plus if you really feel like he lied about something that big, if you never know for sure youll always have problems trusting him. i think its best to just calmly ask him, if he had any prior experience, try asking how far have you gone before we got together. maybe hes experienced in other aspects, without penetration. dont be afraid to ask, you have a right to know, if hes mature enough for sex he should be able to talk about it with you. hopefully your fears will amount to nothing, but you shouldent have to wonder about something like that, if he asks why you dont believe him, just tell him the truth, that he just seems to know alot about it.


In a few weeks, I will be autitioning for my school's talent show. I want to sing. I want a sing a song sung by a female. But here's the catch. I want it to be an oldie's song. Like a classic that everyone knows. Any advice on what song to sing? (link)
two of my oldies faves by chicks are stop in the name of love, and leader of the pack. look into them there well known and easy to sing.


how do i slow dowm my period for a few days? (link)
well you cant really but you do have a couple options, one is to take a bath but it just results in less blood for a few hours, the other is (miricale in my opinion) the new birth control pill seasonale, you only get 4 periods a year.


ok ...is it 100% true that when sperm hits the air it dies???? so if the guy pulled out and just whiped it with his hand could it have make me pregnant? thanks!!! i rate 5s! but please only answer if your sure! thanks! (link)
it takes awhile before it dies, but you can get pregnant durring sex before he pulls out becuase the penis leaks little drops of pre cum all thru out intercourse and theres a good possibility of sperm being in those drops. only takes one. thats why the pullout method is verrry bad, false security.


I am glad these kids have a place to go where they may get some logical advice about sex (and some bad advice too which is sad)

I am just wondering how many of you "adults" think that too many are having sex too early? To me, they know very little about the consequences--most questions are asked after the fact. Perhaps this shows that sex education is not done early enough and it is not effective enough. What do you think? (link)
well i agree kids are having sex too young, but i really dont think sex ed earlier is going to help, matter of fact thats the problem, if you notice kids who dont know squat about sex are less likely to be intrested untill there 15 or so when the hormones start goin nuts, but here in the good ole US of A our kids learn about sex just watching tv and listening to the music of today. the sexual content in our everyday basic cable is enough to spark an intrest in the young who would otherwise know nothing about it dont get me wrong kids need to know the consequenses of sex including the dangers, but i saw it at 12 and even then was a lil disgusted by it. it made me think they knew we were all doin it, even tho i wasent so i then looked at my age mates and wondered who had. another thing is it does fall to parenting, i honest to god dident have my own tv untill i was 14, before that the only tv was in the living room. now i see my best friend and shes put a tv in her 2 yr olds room. it cant be denied that seeing all these "cool beautiful" kids/teens on tv having sex sparks an intrest because unfortunately the goal of childhood these days is to look and feel more grown up. instead of rushing to show kids all the lil secrets of life early enough that thier "warned" we should be teaching them morals and protecting thier innocence as long as we can. i personally believe sex ed is a cop out for good parenting, theres no doubt about it children will be exposed to sex just from media and class mates talk, but shouldent they be comming home directing there questions to thier parents? i think parents are lazy these days they figure kids learn about it in school an thats one less uncomfortable thing for them to deal with, when your that young things your parents tell you are alot more believable than some stupid video that tells you the facts of how to make a baby in technical terms, i can remember being seperated from the boys and we girls were showed pads and tampons while the boys were showed condoms. thats rediculous...WE WERE 12!!!! i dont think there was much talk about sex among my class mates untill after sex ed. its a parents job to teach thier kids about sex, when there ready, not before, if schools have to do it, it should be for 15 year olds. if you think about it an looked up the statistics id just bet back when the thought of sex ed in school was appaling, and seeing janet jacksons tit on tv really would have made people pass out, there was prolly a whole helluva lot less young sex going on back then. the point is why introduce kids to something they arent metally ready for yet? only parents can tell you about the emotional and moral side of sex. sex ed really doesent. its basically a crash course in where babies come from, using terms like reproductive organs. sorry for going on an on, just a strong subject for me. very disgusted with it all.


Ok. My art teacher is little too nice to me. He makes weird comments to me like "your hair looks hott today" or "you friend kayla is cute". And he moved me up to an honors art class because he thought i was "ready" for it. Soo i moved up thinking i was a really good artist..but ever since..he just flirts with me. Also everytime i ask him a question after to class about hw assignments hes like "come to my office'. Its just weird...and he also hugs me..i dunno maybe hes just a nice person. I feel uncomfortable..wat should i do?
PS hes a new teacher..first year..and hes 24 (link)
chain of command syndrome.....tell him it makes you uncomfortable, then if it continues it then becomes sexual harrassment , you have to let him know its unwelcome, but once hes told, you have every right to go above him to a councelor or your principal. dont let it continue, if its not nipped in the bud hell think its ok and welcome. just tell him 1st, that it makes you uncomfortable. give him a chance to get more serious it could be that being new to it, hes trying to be more of a students friend then thier authority figure.


What are the pills you take to make you have your period 4 times a year? Does it make you bleed more? and does it make you gain weight easier? (link)
the pill is SEASONALE!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOHOOOOOO I JUST STARTED ON THEM SUNDAY. my doc dident say anything about gaining weight, but if you read any oral contraceptive they all say a possible side effect is weight gain. the biggest thing, my doc mentioned to me was that you can have more spotting in between periods the 1st year your on them, and also if you smoke it increases a bunch of other risk factors, like heart attack and stroke, but thats the same with all oral contraceptives. its worth it to me, but youll just have to chat with your doc about what risk factors pretain to you.


i would like to know the approiate age to wear make.. can anyone tell me if so how much make up. and is it true that it ages your face and it will get ruined faster then an average person would age because of make up?
(link)
i think i started messing with make up when i was 12, but it was just for fun then, and of course we caked it on like clowns, but i figure when you want to and your parents are ok with it, go to an older sister, your mom, aunt, any girl you trust that wears it and you like how it looks on them, theyd prolly be happy to show you more realistic and mature ways of wearing it as opposed to just dressing up an painting it on for fun dress up. i think if your going to wear make up in public please let someone older that you trust teach you how. theres way to many young girls out there lookin like trash. and if you pick make up thats moisturizing, with vitamins an what not in them, some are even good for your skin.(more expensive tho)make sure you take it off every night, leavin it on can clog your pores an give you breakouts. have fun honey.


I don't want to offend anyone with my questions but theres just so much that doesnt make sense about god and religion. i really do want to believe but i dont understand somethings and it makes me think god cant exist becaus of these things that dont add up.
firstly evolution. humans evolved from apes, there's been loads of scienctific evidence and documentries about it and you learn about it in science. But the bible says adam and eve were the first man and woman, so according to religion evolution cant have existed, well not in humans anyway.
If god is so great and loves us all, why does he make people suffer? i mean even highly religion people. the pope sufferd loads before he died and he's about as religios as people get, so why would god make him suffer?
Also, if god is so great and loves us all, why does he send people to hell? i know some deserve it but surely he wouldnt want anyone to be sent to hell for eternity?
This last point is not something i thought of, it's something that was talked about on the radio but it makes you think. There are lots of religions, but if any, only 1 must be true and the rest of them are lies. people must have made some religions up because some say theres only 1 god, some religions have many gods and all different types of beliefs, so they cant all be true. i hope someone can help me, because its so confusing and i honestly do want to believe.
sorry, if i offended anyone, i really dont want to. its just so confusing.
thank you x (link)
ok heres my take on it, theres a million religions, theres a million faces of god, ive learned alot about different ones and theres questions to all, i havent found the awnsers to. however i do believe in god, thats the crust of it. there are few things alot of religions have in common, both christian and native american, had a story for the flood (noahs ark) so i look at it this way, alot of history has passed before us, sometimes we cant explain it, so we make up what we dont know. take native americans, they know there was a flood and they have a story for it, they also had a story for the 1st man and woman. they dident know back then the milky way was a galaxy so many thought it was the happy hunting trail(heaven) the thing is god does exist, and he does love us, i think he wears the face WE PICTURE.
i dont think its a man or woman, i dont think it cares what we call it or how we picture it. i also know god(i personally prefer to think of god as a him) dident write the bible or any other religious dogma. i think "religions" as we know them, are humans explanation for what they cant explain, and its humans earliest form of laws. as youll see upon researching, most religions offer a good way of life if followed and not distorted to fit our own ends. like most religions, say not to kill or cheat or lie or hurt others, and to try to do good for others. i dont believe in hell, i think its something humans made up to keep people following thier laws. my suggestion is to research as many as possible, and when you find the one for you, youll know it. there are many paths to god, and thier are many faces to god, just find the path and face that comfort you. if your having a hard time believing in a religion, dont, you know wrong from right its inside you. god put it there. i dont think god cares if you believe in human writings, i think he just cares that you believe in him. i dont know about you but i been thru some shit, and when i think back on it, i still dont know how i got out of it alive, i only know it wasent me alone.


I have a problem with bleeing alot during sexual intercorse what is that? (link)
are you ragging at the time? if yes, its normal. as fluids mix with the blood it apears to be alot of blood. nothing to worry about. however... if your not scheduled to be on your period and your bleeding while having sex, i can only think of one way youd bleed, your very dry, an its causing excessive vaginal tearing but even that wouldent be really considered alot of blood, if that were the case youd be in quite alot of pain, as this usually only occurs whe a woman is raped. durring sex a woman;s vagina always gets little tears in the walls(why we contract stds easier then men) but it rarley causes bleeding. ill get to the point if your not in horrible pain, and your not on your period, see a doc.if it is painful, an this is whats causing the bleeding, try lubricant like k-y jelly.


Me and my boyfriend have been together for alomost a year & a half. We are (were) supposed to get married next month. Last night we were talking and he told me something that he had been holding in since last summer that he wanted to get off his chest. I was pregnant last summer and miscarried, he told me he doesnt believe I was ever pregnant. This has hurt me so much, we are not little kids, in fact I am older than him (21 & 23) I would not make up such a horrible story, I was crushed when it happened and still cry at night sometimes when I think about it. He says he cant marry me till he has proof. Getting "proof" isnt a problem, but i feel now as though I cant marry him becuase he doesnt trust me and Ive always been told if you dont have trrust you dont have nothin. I Love him more than I could ever say and the thought of losing him upsets me to no end, but at that same time i feel so betrayed by him like im some kind of monster that would make up a story like that. What should I do? please help Ill rate!! (link)
you know, ive been married for three years now, and i feel a little differently, i think without honesty, you have nothing, trust builds from honesty,the problem with trust is, it's extremely fragile. if someone you trusted told you they suspected your boyfreind of cheating and he denies it, you are going to spend a good long time doubting him, even tho you trust him. you know all it takes is a negative word from someone else you trust to make you have doubts. i think youd want proof that he was faithful. i know this hurts you but i dont think its that he doesent trust you, i suspect someone he trusts,(parent,sibling, friend) put the doubt in his mind. it happens. if he dident trust you he wouldent have even asked for proof, he wouldve just said you lied and thats that. i think he very much wants to believe you, but on this issue something(i suspect someone) gave him doubts. i think you should give him the proof, an tell him you understand, but it hurts to have him doubt you. once he sees you were telling the truth, the honesty will build more trust, for both of you, he was honest enough to tell you his doubts, it took him awhile but he was finally honest. i think he prolly spent a long time aruging with himself over his doubts, give him some peace forgive him and let it go, because trust me if you stay together with anyone long enough, something or someone is going to cause you to doubt each other,but by being honest and and willing to prove your honesty makes trust the next time around harder to break.


Ive never really told anyone this but here goes... I am 13/f and I like hollister, abercrombie, etc., I have alot of friends, I have a boyfriend, all the usual. Anyways I dont know how to explain this but I feel like a boy. I wear girl clothes, and I like boys and stuff(im not lesbian) but inside I just feel like a boy. I think its really weird. I used to wear guy clothes and stuff but that was when I was younger. Do you guys think this is weird or what? Is there like anything I can do to fix this annoying problem? Or at least I hope im not bi... (link)
ok if your not lookin at girls an thinking "oooh baby", your not gay or bi. chances are you are not an actual boy, born into a girl's body.(it happens)
i can understand why itd make you feel weird, but the thing is i think it's pretty normal for you to feel this way sometimes. i mean look at it like this, yes women have come a long way since the 1800's but... there's still alot to be desired. women are still paid less in many cases then men at the same job, parent's give thier sons more freedom then thier daughter's. it's also been proven by many girls who walk the street at night dressed as boys that they are safer then if theyd gone out as girl's. so it's really not that unusual for a girl to want to be a guy, and if you do guy thing's like climb trees, run with the boys, or where jeans and tee's instead of skirts and tank tops you might start to feel like one of the guy's, and if you still feel like a guy inside, even tho your dressing girly, you might just be missing, being one of the guys. if you enjoyed being a tom boy, and now your kinda forcing yourself to dress and act girly, it's just not who you are. alot of women feel like they should have been boys its mostly the strong independent types that would take on the world, just as strongly as a man....if only the world would let them.


how would you define cheating??

kissing, sex, multiple relationships, etc etc??

i was juss curious.

thanks!! (link)
i think cheating is defined by the people in a relationship. one person your with may think hugging the oppisite sex behind thier backs is cheating, the next person, could care less but draws the cheating line at kissing.if you really want to know what YOU should consider cheating, ask your boyfriend/girlfriend, where they draw the line? after all, its only your partner that can tell you what would hurt them, and what they think is nothing. if your only asking for yourself, you should try thinking about how it would make you feel if your boyfriend/girlfriend kissed,hugged,held hands,went to a movie or whatever with the oppisite sex, picture each thing as if it had happened, the things you picture that make you feel, angry hurt, and or betrayed are prolly things youd consider cheating. it just depends on you an the person your with.


I'm currently expecting my first child and my due date is fast approaching. I recently told my husband that I'm hurt that no one has offered to throw a baby shower even though everyone around us (family, friends, coworkers, church members) knows that we are expecting. He said that I should throw a baby shower for myself. I'm afraid that it would be a breach of etiquette and come across as greedy. With our current financial situation, the gifts would be helpful, but I want the shower more for the companionship and celebration that comes with it.
1) Would you consider it greedy if someone were to invite you to a baby shower they were throwing for themself?
2) What would you do in this situation? (link)
id confide the whole truth, (the need for the gifts) and how hurt you are to someone you trust (that wont blab to everyone) ask them to find out if theres one being planned and if not ask them to mention it to the right people, in a nonlachant way. i mean theres no reason for you not to get one, an you shouldent have to throw it yourself. if it were me theres a few people i could tell the whole truth to an they would see that i got one. i mean theres got to be at least one woman in your life that can go up to your friends and casually say, "you know what we need to do,and i cant belive i dident think of it sooner, we should really throw a baby shower for -----your name here--- it could be like our last group party without kids runnin around" honestly i wouldent give myself one because they may intend to suprise you. but id definately confide to someone that would never rat you out about your feelings or the lil bit of help you need. that way if one isent planned them mentioning it will get the ball rolling.


hey i was just nairing my arms and i think i got a burn on them..is that even possible.

p,s= i only had it on my arms for like 4 minutes (link)
nair if left on longer than directed or if put on sensitive skin can cause chemical burns. ive only had this happen once just a small spot on my eyebrow, i rubbed in a little neosporin an kept makeup, lotions, an other beauty crap off it. it healed up in about 4 days. if the burns hurt really bad an cover more than a 3 inch area id see a doctor in case the burns are too serious for home remedies. you might also have luck with a cool damp compress.
not ice tho, it will only damage the nerves more.


what does it mean when people say like...id tap that? (link)
basically saying (in vulgar and disrespectful terms) that the one saying "id tap that" or "hit that" would like to have sex with the person thier saying it about. although considering the way people say this i think sex is a nice way of putting it, what they are actually saying is id f*** him/her.




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