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Q: Hi, what I will address won't mainly be asking for advice, but for the input of the columnists on advicenators on a very controversial issue of morals against faith in the latter of sex.

I know that among some religions that premarital sex is sinful and highly prohibited without any exceptions, but what are your opinions?

I myself am a Catholic-Christan, and believed in the "sex until marriage" thing when I was together with my boyfriend. But as we got to know each other over the years, we got into intellectual conversations about this topic and if it's argument is valid and reasonable. I'm not saying that our relationship prompted a shift in mindset on this issue, but knowing him and being with him for so many years along with witnessing other married couples made me think about this a little more thoroughly.

I started to think about it as I grew older, and I began to feel differently. The divorce rate in the U.S. is at an amazingly high rate, and more couples are breaking it off even after saving the sex until marriage "policy". On some occasions I even think that these breakoffs are due to the quality of the sex. If the sex isn't good, usually lovers leave and commit infidelity. Unless the couple is really committed to one another, they will keep trying to make the sex work out.

The way I think about this scenario now is that I believe that it is acceptable to have sex before marriage, under certain circumstances. Because a couple must establish that intellectual intimate bond with commitment, devotion, loyalty, etc. Even then does that take years to accomplish, and the time spent shows respect to each other that both partners are willing to stick it out this long and wait for each other to take action that is of great importance. Also after all that is done, the relationship goes to the next level in the stage of sex. Having sex before marriage lets the couple know how how much they really love each other and how much they are willing to commit to each other. In a sense it tests us on how much we value sex and what factor it plays in our life. And if we don't pass the test in avoiding adultery, it was never meant to be with that person, so how can a couple get married if sex and passion got the best of them to steer them toward someone else?

To conclude, although you could say I'm going against my religion, it doesn't mean that I don't have faith. A lot of the "rules" that we have to abide by sometimes do seem unreasonable, in order to understand love and all the goodness that it brings, I really don't think marriage is enough to keep someone faithful.

In no ways am I encouraging premarital sex, especially on advicenators with teeny-boppers running around having sex with their semi-erect penises, but what I am saying is that before sex comes commitment, loyalty, devotion, understanding, civility, and vice versa. But I do believe that before marriage comes sex. Why because marriage is the highest level that a couple can go through to show their love toward one another for all of eternity, and how can you reach the highest level without sharing everything of yourself to your soulmate, including your most prized possession?

I apologize if I come off a little bias, but that isn't my intention at all. I'm not promoting anything, nor am I objectifying "sex before marriage." Those couples who are able to succeed through this lifestyle, I admire you, I really do. Especially in a society that is centered around sex nowadays. But I would like to know the opinions of others to better understand this controversial subject.

Thanks and sorry for the long read! I hope to hear a lot of responses!
you did make alot of good points! have you considered being a lawyer? you would be good at it!
ok, well, you mentioned that a couple having sex is to see how much devotion they have for each other, or something like that. well waiting until marriage can also show how much devotion two people have for each other! it shows they love each other enough to save that special moment until they are married. it also shows neither of the two people are in the relationship for just sex. and that both people are more mature than that.
i don't know about you but i'm saving myself for my husband. it will be so much more special that way!!
hope i helped!
good luck with this debate thingy!
xoxo

Q: hey it's a kind of weird question..but i need to kno! lol well i'm trying to loose weight..BUT yah know how all the skinny girls have small boobs? lol well i think mine r between big n small n i was just wondering if i would run or do sit ups i kno it will make my stomic smaller but will it make my boobs smaller to??

thanx soo much!!
hey!
ok, i don't wanna offend anyone here, but bigger girls tend to have bigger boobs because they have more fat there. but running and doing sit ups will not make your boobs smaller! there is actually a kind of push up that makes your boobs less saggy. you just make your arms really wide while doing normal push ups!
hope i helped!!
good luck sweetie!!
xoxo

Q: hey. I have only had one boyfriend. What do i need to do to get a guy to notice me?
oh yea! go you! i've only had 0ne boyfriend to!!
ummm.... well... me having like almost no experience and everything.... i think you should just be really nice to the guy you like. i mean like go out of your way to say hi and smile at him! and kinda flirt with him a little. that's how i got my first boyfriend! oh, and if you can pick your seats in any of your classessit next to him!
hope i helped!
good luck!
xoxo

Q: okay so I'm 14 f. I haven't had a boy firend yet, is that weird. See I'm in french immersion, and theres only lik 3 guys in it and there nerds. so all of my friends are nerds. I moved here last year so I don't really no many other people, but still. I mean, I've been asked out a lot, but that was at my old school and I was in grade 5-6-7 so "going out" with someone was just holding their hand in school, so I don't count that. Is it sad that I've never been on a REAL date? How can I change?
sweetie, if there's something wrong with you, then there is something wrong with me to! i'm 14 and i've had one boyfriend, but he was shy and we never talked! like we would text a ton but like we never talked at school or went on a real date. so no there is nothing wrong with you! if you date someone now, it's most likely you are not gonna end up marrying them!
hope i helped!
xoxo

Q: When is a good time to tell your boyfriend of a year that the relationship is getting too serious and you're not realy for it?
if you feel that way now, call him up and tell now hon!
hope i helped!
xoxo

Q: Hey, I like this guy alot, but he always wants me to do stuff with him more than kissing. Im 14 and I dont really want to b/c Im a Christian and I dont like to do stuff like that ..but I like him ALOT HELP ME!
stand up for your faith! Don't do anything you are not comfortable with! if he really likes you he will understand. Just don't drop your faith! no sex until marriage!
hope i helped!
xoxo

Q: i want to re dedicate my self to the lord but i need helping makeing my way up becoming a better christian...i have tried to read the bible but i need an easier way to understand...can anyone help me
i'm sooooo glad you want 2 rededicate urself 2 da Lord!!!!!! that's sooooo awesome!!!! if you need help, pray and ask him! and sun. and wed. church is great. NIV teen study bible! or life application bible. they're both awesome!!!! new living translation and NIV are the easiest to understand for me. but you might like something different!!
i'm sooo proud of u! if you need anymore help i go to a private christian school, so it's like church everyday!! ya, one of the classes is bible! it's awesome! soooo, if you need more help with spiritual stuff, just drop one in my inbox!!!!
hope i helped!!!
i'm prayin 4 ya!!!
xoxo

Q: Does anyone no how to get eye makeup off, anything but vasiline or is thta the only thing that workds?
ok there are these eye makeup remover pads and they are really good! the brand is Almay. they are moisturizing eye makeup remover pads. and they come in this short fat tube type thing.
hope i helped!!
xoxo

Q: Did anyone marry someone their high school love?!

:)
my best friends parents were high school sweet hearts! that is soooo cute! my sisters teacher knew her husband since kindergarten!!
hope i helped!!!!!!!!
xoxo

Q: Once one of my friend told me she cuts herself.
I was very worried so i told my bets frined. Now we arnt bf anymreo and she told everyoen saying "Alex told me Danielle cuts" not daniele is mad at me and evryone is clalign me a gossiper What do i do
i think you should forget about everyone else, and apologize to the girl that cuts. become friends with her again and try to help her. cutting ain't fun. trust me!
hope i helped!!
xoxo

Q: well were havin celeb day at school besides the olsen twins can anyone think of two celebritys me and my friend could do?

thanx a bunch!
hilary and hailey duff
lucy and ethel!!!!!!!!
hope i helped!!!
have fun on celeb day!!!
xoxo

Q: im doing an art collage on candy but im running out of candy to draw, so what kind of candy should i draw???
CANDY!!! ok i'm better now. lol ok
1) dum dums
2) krackle
3) do different brands of chocolate! dove, hershey, palmer, dark chocolate
4) different brands of gum! hubba bubbla, bubble tape, etc.
you have already covered everything else!
hope i helped!!!!!!
xoxo

Q: I just found out that this girl i know is about to die because of cancer. I dont know how to handle it. someone please help me!!
wow... hon i am so sorry. the only way i know of to handle that is just rely on God. He will get you through this. and pray for the girl with cancer. i will. and i'll pray for you. and if you are not a christian, try it out! you might like it!
i really hope i helped.
good luck sweetie,
xoxo

Q: i'm trying to name my new kitten that i got a few days ago.
She's a simease mix, does anyone have a good name to name her? ( It's a girl! )
OOOOO!!!! i love you! i love this question!!! ok! here we go!
1) sweetums... hee hee! i love that name!
2) peaches
3) princess
4) angel
5) cricket
6) daisy
7) sunflower
8) cutie pie
9) sugar
10) mooo... i love that name!! :-)
11) meow
12) jumma
13) killer
14) kitty
15) spunky
16) whatever state you are from
17) texas... that's my state!
18) sweetie pie
19) honey bunch!
20) your favorite color!
21) your favorit band
22) hershey
23) skittles
24) honey
25) baby
26) precious
27) crystal
28) diamond
29)emerald
30) whiskers
31) muffin
32) minni
33) paws... you know like jaws! ha ha ha!
34) pepper
35) caramel
36) autumn
37) summer
38) spring
39) rainbow
40) sparkle
41) shimmer
42) twilight
43) dream
44) cinnamin
45) glimmer
46) sweet heart
47) cocoa
48) oreo
49) rose
50) liberty
51) america
52) blossom
53) bloom
54) bluebonnet
55) trixie
56) tuffy
57) tiny
58) bruiser
59) morning
60) dew
61) chika
62) fluffy
63) fifi
64) mittens
hope i helped!!!
xoxo



Q: I know having bulimia,anorixia or anything like that isnt pleasing to God...but is it considered a sin?
i'm sorry but yes it is a sin. when you have anorexia or bulimia it means you are not happy with Gods creation. and that makes him sad. you are also hurting yourself. and that also makes him sad. and you are sopposed to treat your body like a temple. and if you have an eating disorder then you ain't treating your body like a temple.
"Don't you know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him; for God's temple is sacred, and you are that temple."
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
hope i helped!
xoxo



Q: I just want to know what are some things you can say to a girl to charm her and make her like you. Such what are some things i could say to the girl i like to just slowly make her like me. Are there anythings that girls like to hear that charms them. Thanks any help is pretty much appreciated
tell her you think she's beautiful. make her feel special. give her alot of attention. complement her on her sense of humor. tell her the little things you notice that you love about her. like maybe the way she laughs. complement her on her personality! make her feel important!

Q: I have REALLY horrid discharge..and sumtimes it can stain my panties an off-yellow...does anyy one know how to make it stop...or when im going to NOt have discharge any more?
hey!
i had that to!!!! mine stopped when i got my first period, but it still happens every once in while. i just wore pantiliners. keeps you feeling fresh and clean!! hope i helped! good luck sweetie!!
xoxo

bio
honeybunch
hey ya'll!!
i LOVE to help people! ask me anything, i've probably been there! i've been through alot!!
alot of my advice will probably contain some refrence to God! i'm a strong christian! God is awesome!! can't wait to hear from you!!
love always!!
xoxo

Info
Gender:
Female

Location:
Texas

Occupation:
volleyball player

Age:
14

Member Since:
March 15, 2005

Answers:
57

Last Update:
April 18, 2005

Visitors:
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