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My name is Elly and I am 18 years old. I live in Michigan and I graduated High School in '07. I'm currently attending a great college, but I'm home for the summer. It's too nice outside to sit on the computer all day, so I might not be as active on here as I would like.I guess a good way to describe me is experienced. I've discovered a lot about life and I can't wait to discover more... while having fun at the same time of course! ...BUT, like everyone, I have experienced things in life that I rather wish I hadn't. And I also feel that those bad experiences qualify me to help others with this column.
I have been in a serious relationship for over two and a half years now. I personally know that love is a difficult thing to nurture. It takes a lot of work. Life is NOT a fairytale where two people can simply love each other and everything will just fall into place. It doesn't work like that in the real world.
People on Advicenators are starting to disappoint me. Everyone says "ooh I want to help! I've experienced EVERYTHING!" Yet, I can't tell you how many questions I see with answers like "you could have googled that" or "we're not going to do your homework" or "I'm so sick of 'wow does he like me?!' questions." I used to sort of be like that, but now I realize how hypocritical that is. If I know the answer to a question, I will answer to the best of my ability without making you feel stupid for asking it in the first place. Advicenators is going to turn into a pretty nasty place if people just keep brushing off questions like that.
Rate or don't rate. I really don't care. But don't give me a 1 just because I tell you something you don't want to hear. Go to your mom for advice if you want sugarcoated answers.
I can give excellent advice on:
relationships/sex
friendship
family issues
anything about animals (i worked at a vet for several years)
college
advice
Me and my boyfriend thought it would be nice to have our song...so we choose The Truth by Good Charolette ...do you think this is a good song ?
I love that song, so yea I think it's good! lol!
I don't want to be rude and I don't mean to be rude/offend anyone but I don't know how else to word this question. I live in a neighborhood that's filled with rich, snobby people with spoiled kids. I mean, it's not like mansions or anything but we're definately in the better half the average income kind of place. Now, my friend, whom I love dearly is on the poor side. Her house can basically fit in my house like 3 times and my room is double the size of hers and she shares hers with her sister. Well, I don't care about how priviledged [sp?] people are and stuff but I do feel bad about inviting people over. Like I want to invite my friend over but I'm afraid to because I feel like a total b**** and a snobby spoiled girl. How do I get over this and invite her for the first time over my house?
Everyone has different blessings. Sure, your friend might have a small house, but I'm sure she has other great things in her life to be thankful for. I know how you feel. Whenever I have people over, I often hear them say "Oh wow your house is so big!" If she starts doing that, just say "thanks" and change the subject. That way, you're appreciating the compliment and you won't sound snobby. Just because you have a big house does NOT make you "spoiled." If the girl is a good friend, she would see that it's obvious you are inviting her over because you want to spend time with her... not show off how big your house is.
i like this girl im my class but we are friends and i dont want to ask her out incase it puts her off what should i do?
Well being friends is a big step toward going out with this girl. Do you guys only talk in school? If so, it's time to take it up a notch. Invite her to the movies with either just you or a group of friends. It really doesn't matter as long as you two start hanging out outside of school. Get to know her better. Flirt with her a little bit and see if she flirts back or sends you any signs that she likes you. If she seems really eager to hang out with you one on one, she may have feelings for you. Once you feel that you two have become a lot closer and no a lot about each other, then ask her out.
i don't see how tampons work for swimming.. wouldn't it absorb all of the water? then turn it into reddish-bloodish-water and it get all in the water? or the tampon would get so full that it could absorb anymore blood? i don't get it.. please explain.
The reason tampons are good for swimming is because it is so deep in your vagina that no water can get up in there. The muscles and skin are arranged around that part of your body so that it's impossible for water and excess moisture to find it's way in there.
What is a good summer job that pays high, and I can have it as a second job? besides a summer camp?
A good summer job that is flexible, as most second jobs are, would be a personal business such as dog-walking or babysitting. You can set your own hours and charge however much you want.
Waitressing is good too, paywise, because you get tips. Better yet, getting a job at a marina would be perfect because you get tips + minumum wage and you can't get that waitressing.
so you know how if the test thing says negative you should take another one just to be sure? if it says positive should you have to take another one too? can it ever "lie" when it says positive?
The only sure-fire 100% error-proof way to know if you're pregnant is to see a doctor. Whether the at-home test is positive or negative, the safest bet is to see a doctor for a test.
But, to answer your question, yes, it is very possible that even if a test says positive, it can be wrong. Same goes for if it's negative.
Okay, I'm 16, female. Today, me and my boyfriend had sex for the first time. I've had sex once before but it was almost a year ago. After we had sex, I was bleeding a little bit. when I got home later, there was a very little bit of blood in my underwear. but when i checked myself, it was a little red, but there was no signs bleeding.
It's also still a little sore. is this normal or what is it? I've already had my "cherry popped" ... or so i think?
Since there was such a big time gap between the last time you had sex and the time you had sex with your boyfriend, your vagina has basically forgotten what it's like to have a penis in there. It most likely just needs to be stretched out a little more. The soreness is totally normal. Just because you had sex once before doesn't mean your body is totally used to it. You still need time to adjust. Take it slow next time until he can enter you and cause you no pain whatsoever.
How do you know when you need a break with your boyfriend? Because, part of me wants to and the other doesnt.
Any help?
You may need a break if:
-you're fighting more than usual
-you find that every thing he does, no matter how small, seems to annoy you
-he would rather spend time away from you than with you
-both of you are really stressed out and cannot find comfort in one another
-you dread having to see him because you think you'll fight
-you catch yourself thinking about being with someone else and wondering if you'd be happier with someone else
Why don't you try this: draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper. Write on one side all the good things in your relationship, and on the other, write all the bad things about your relationship. If there is more bad than good, it's time for a break. If there's more good than bad, but the bad things are unfixable at this point, it's time for a break.
And I agree with the columnist below me: if you love something, let it go. If it comes back, you know it really is love. Good luck.
My boyfriend and my one month is tommorrow but i have no freaking clue what to get him. I mean i really dont know where he shops and stuff because we have been only going out for a month now and i hardly to get too see him because we go to different schools. Soooo i need your help. Tell me what some of you girls got your bf's for your one month or something. Ang guys tell me what you guys wanted for your one month or just a present. Thanks :]
xoxo
~katelyn~
I bought my boyfriend a T-shirt from hot topic for our one month. It had his favorite band on it.
But I'd like to warn you right now: after you date your boyfriend for awhile, you'll soon realize that buying him a gift for an anniversary every month gets expensive. REALLY expensive.
Make sure you don't go overboard with your first anniversary gift for several reasons:
1) if it's too big, he might get the impression that you're trying to hard to keep him as a boyfriend
2) it will make him think he has to buy you nice gifts every month, which might not be something he can afford
3) it's expensive for you
4) it truly is the thought that counts. I can't think of a single guy that would rather have an expensive gift than a poem his girlfriend wrote.
So basically, buy him a sweet card, do something creative for him (like write a poem or create a CD with all your fav. love songs on it for him), and spend a nice evening together watching movies.
Happy anniversary!!!
i love some boy and i think he love me to but i really want to keep on talking to him but i don't know what to say?
Talk about school. Talk about your families. If it's hard to start conversations with him, just invite him to see a movie sometime or to go bowling. The more fun you have together, the easier it will be to have conversations with him. If you think you really like this guy, it's important to get to know each other as friends in order to start a good relationship.
15/f. when a boy asks you out in person, what are you supposed to say? you can't just say YES. that would be weird. what else can i say?
I'm quite sure the asker would be just THRILLED if you said yes, but if you wanted it to sound a little "less weird," say, "Sure that'd be awesome!" Just don't sound TOO excited when you say it or you might sound a bit desperate.
Sometimes I want to tell my boyfriend that he looks good.... but how do I say it?
The thing is, I don't want to say GOOD or beautiful. :/
I only know of cute. I joke around with pretty.
I comment about his eyes a lot.. But the 'cute' thing gets old.
Or does it not?
*Your opinion?*
It might sound cheesy, but I know from experience that guys LOVE being called handsome. Sometimes my boyfriend says I'm beautiful and I say, "Aww you are too!" Guys like being called cute, but they like all kinds of compliments including hot, sexy, handsome, gorgeous, etc.
i just can't take my life anymore. i have issues with my family, alot of my close friends treat me like crap and are hypocrites/manipultive jealous attention-seekers, i dont have a boyfriend or anything, nothings really going right.
im just so sick of everything.
no im not suicidal at all.
i just feel like crap.
i can't wait to go to collage and move out of this place.
any suggestions - how do i make myself feel better?
Join a sport or club that does things that interest you. It's a good way to meet new people and make new friends with the same interests as you. I'm not sure how old you are, but maybe get a job that will help you to get out of the house a couple days a week and earn a little extra cash so you can buy a few things and spoil yourself every now and then. Plus, jobs are another good way to meet people, not to mention help you handle more responsibilities.
Anyway, I'm not sure what kind of issues you have with your family, but next time you're at home, why not strike up an interesting coversation with your parents or surprise them with a picnic lunch and go to the park with them. Just try to spend at least a half hour of quality time with them, even if it's just a nice conversation with them. You can get to know them, they can get to know you, and you'll learn to respect each other a lot more. It works. It helps. Try it.
Another thing that might help you be a little happier is to get a pet. I don't know if you have any pets, but I find that nothing cheers me up like a nice slobbery kiss from my puppy. Even if it's just a fish or a hamster, they can crack you up with the cute little things they do and can make you an all around cheerier person.
And next time your friends act like hypocrites or are gossiping or doing anything else that might make you annoyed by them, change the subject to something more enjoyable. Crack a few jokes, invite them for a girls night in to watch cheesy movies. Either try to make peace, or stay away from them. If you can't make things better with them, there's no point in staying friends with them because they'll make you more upset.
If all else fails, and you still feel pretty badly, make a list. Draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper and on the right side, list everything that is good in your life. On the left, list everything that is going badly in your life. That way, when you're feeling blue, you can look at the list of good things and appreciate those things and try to add to the list. Then, you can look at the bad things and determine ways to make those things better. It's cheesy, but it helps and no one has to see it but you.
Life gets better. Everyone has rough days. I know you can get through it. :)
okay. so, i've been wanting to get snakebites for a while. its where you have one lip ring on one side of your mouth and another on the other side of your mouth. the only thing is my mom won't let me get them, because she thinks they'll hurt too much and that they'll get infected? has anyone ever had snakebites, and do they hurt alot, and waht are the chances of them getting infected and around how much do they cost?.
thanks.
Piercings can get pretty expensive. I suppose it would depend on where you got it done at. Check with all the areas where you live in which you could get the piercings and compare prices. You probably won't find anything cheaper than $40-$50. Even that seems low. When my friend got her nose pierced, it was $80. As for pain, yea, it hurts, but it's no different than any other piercing. Your body is going to reject the piercing at first, causing redness and swelling, but that will fade with time. It's important that a professional does it for you so it won't cause any permanent damage and it's even more important that you clean the piercings twice a day, perhaps more. As long as you keep them clean and follow the advice the professional gives you, an infection is highly unlikely.
Can you be catholic or do you have to be baptized when born? because my family come from a long line of buddism but I don't beleive in it, I beleive in God but i don't know how to make it offical, etc or if i'm talking to him for nothing
You can get baptized at any age. All you have to do is go to any catholic church in your area, tell the priest what's going on, and the church will welcome you with open arms. Congrats on wanting to convert! I hope it goes well!
17/m
Aight, i'm confused
my girlfriend tried explaining how tampons work? because i wanted to have sex and she couldnt because her tampon or something? ok, if the tampon goes in the same hole, does that mean she can have pleasure from it?
signed,
clueless
Girls are not pleasured with tampons. And they aren't pleasured by having a penis inside them either. It can make them aroused, but they will not have any pleasure from a tampon or a penis. Girls are pleasured when their clitoris is stimulated. The clitoris is about 1.5 inches above the vaginal opening.
Hope that clears things up for ya!
okay i'm 13 and i havn't had my period yet. i live with my dad so its really hard to bring up that subject, and i cant shave my legs because,again it hard to bring up the subject. i have air under my arms, and i'm guessing i should be shaving...but how do i bring up tht subject. what should i do? i cant go to anyone else either.
thanks in advance
Your dad knows that you're going to experience these things sooner or later. Simply tell your dad that you need some "feminine products" from the store. Ask for some money, if you don't have your own, and have him drive you to the store. He can just wait in the car while you go inside and get the things you need. Get yourself some creme and a good razor, along with some refills, some pads in case you start soon, and maybe pantyliners if you need them. When you started living with your dad, he knew that, as a girl, you would need to shave your legs and deal with your period, so he will be sympathetic to the subject.
What does sun lotion actually do and do to your skin? Is those things that say SPF15 and stuff a sun lotion or are they in a different category?
If you wear a lot can you prevent getting a tan?
Sun screen, or sun tan lotion, protects your skin from the harmful UV rays of the sun, while at the same time allowing the melanin in your skin to use those rays to develop vitamin D. SPF 15 simply means your skin will only get the damage the sun would give you in an hour over a span of 15 hours. Make sense? You can definately still get a tan with sun lotion. If you want a good tan, use a lotion that is at least SPF 8 and no higher than SPF 15. If you don't want a tan, use SPF 45 or higher. It really depends on your skin type.
i did something totally embarassing on friday that makes me never want to go to school againn. okay well we were reading some boring paper thing in science and it was about organisms and how they pollute water or something like that, i don't know. well my teacher passed out a worksheet and we had to write down the answers to the questions from the text, and by mistake (i wasnt paying attention) i wrote down "orgasm" instead of "organism". when my teacher was correcting the papers and she came to mine, she just literally burst out laughing and that freaking asshole TOLD THE CLASS that i wrote that down. i died of embarassment, seriously.. i cant even face that class anymore. what can i do?!!?!?!?! pleasee helppp. thankk you.
First of all, you need to confront your teacher. NO ONE can make you feel inferior without your consent. Tell her that what she did was immature and it really embarassed you and she had NO RIGHT to reveal your name to the class. Your confidence will most likely astound her and she will never make fun of you again. As for the kids in your class, if they tease you about it, just laugh about it and don't let it show that it bothers you. If they see that it DOES bug you, they'll keep doing it. But if you laugh about it, they'll stop.
Hey i am a 13 year old girl and i have a boyfriend and he's like reeeeeeeeealy sweet and he loves me but.... When ever im sad he like just gives me this look as if i have done somthing to affend him. Then he just walk's off and dosen't do anything about it. so what should i do???? Can someone help me please im crying:'(
Love,
sad and no one cares!!!
Point out to him nicely that this bothers you. Ask, "Why don't you ever hold me when I'm sad? I'm not asking you to fix all my problems, but do you think you could try to make me feel a little bit better?" Tell him that if he was ever sad, you'd be there to cheer him up in a heartbeat.
Maybe your boyfriend thinks your too emotional. Are you upset or crying often? If you are, that might be scaring him away. You didn't say how old he was, but I'm assuming he is your age. Plus, if you're his first girlfriend, he might not know how to deal with a crying girlfriend. Perhaps he's scared to say the wrong thing.
Just sit down with him and have a talk about. Communication can solve many many problems.
Good luck!